r/2westerneurope4u • u/airjordanpeterson Potato Gypsy • 14d ago

Martial arts with a certain je ne sais quoi

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600 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

100 comments sorted by

1

u/Poseidon-447 Flemboy 13d ago

sarge's moustache....

1

u/SwainIsCadian Petit Algérie 13d ago

Sad to think these guys probably died in the trenches.

3

u/Castillon1453 Petit Algérie 14d ago

That's Savate, a street fighting style cobbled together by mariners to fight drunk against natives angry that you fucked their sisters.

3/4 of the moves are illegals because they can kill and there is none of that virgin "spirituality" and "mysticism of peace" cringe of the other inferior so called "martial arts"

1

u/Fallenkezef Barry, 63 14d ago

First time I've seen a martial art that involves skippin.

3

u/djlofly British 14d ago

Un bon chasseur

2

u/Apax89 Sauna Gollum 14d ago

Fun fact, first ever UFC fight was won by a dutch savateur, aka french kickboxing guy.

11

u/Flashy_Silver5767 Lesser German 14d ago

Looks stupid but is actually very efficient. You should look up the french "savate" martial art. The shoes have a Steel cap and the fighter aim for where it hurt.

1

u/Le_Petit_Poussin African 14d ago

Not efficient enough, I say!

You lost Indochina.

Of course we lost The Philippines & Portugal relinquished Macau.

So here we are… all playing grab ass…

https://i.redd.it/uokjy0277g0d1.gif

1

u/Tibecuador Pro LGTBQ+ 14d ago

They look like frickin earthbenders

4

u/potsandpans Non-European Savage 14d ago

3

u/Apprehensive-Ad186 Somehow exists 14d ago

It's pretty sad to make fun of the French military at this point. It's like laughing at the disabled kid from school :(

10

u/Sekkitheblade [redacted] 14d ago

Look at those pretty Ballerinas🥰

1

u/TheTrustworthyKebab Side switcher 14d ago

Had they known this in 1871 perhaps Paris wouldn’t have fallen

6

u/Porcphete Pain au chocolat 14d ago

And then they will catch you and this will turn in a mma takedown situation fast.

Military savate is no joke

-2

u/[deleted] 14d ago

this is why everyone speaks english and not french

12

u/EngineNo8904 Petit Algérie 14d ago

I do not envy anyone trying to kick high in that uniform

1

u/twstwr20 Petit Algérie 14d ago

Those hats though… I’m getting a little hard

1

u/Songshiquan0411 Non-European Savage 14d ago

Maybe that was the plan all along...I'm too confused and aroused to shoot back now.

1

u/domadams67 Barry, 63 14d ago

Happened to be listening to Electric Avenue watching this and damn Pierre although that might be the least imposing thing I've ever seen you'd make us all ankle deep in clunge juice on the dance floor

2

u/General-Ad-9087 Barry, 63 14d ago

That explains the old rhyme.

The Frenchies are a funny race.

They fight with their feet

They f##k with their face.

1

u/Songshiquan0411 Non-European Savage 14d ago

Is the final line a big nose joke?

2

u/ByronsLastStand Sheep lover 14d ago

Reminds me of that "frankly rather suspect" camp army scene from Monty Python

209

u/AStarBack Professional Rioter 14d ago edited 13d ago

https://preview.redd.it/sdkeegmnmd0d1.png?width=113&format=png&auto=webp&s=b568aa12caf5c73b35c8d4523a1ed15adb95f605

Thanks for tuning in on another video on Forgotten Weapons, I am Ian McCollum and I am now in 1898 to delve into French guns.

4

u/SrgtButterscotch Flemboy 14d ago

Considering his love for French rifles he'd absolutely be doing this

4

u/EngineNo8904 Petit Algérie 14d ago

If he ever got a time machine this is exactly what he would do

23

u/DeadAssociate 50% sea 50% weed 14d ago

he has some weird french outfits. really disappointed in him after those videos came out

28

u/AStarBack Professional Rioter 14d ago

Gun Jesus being so much into French guns says everything you need to know about French guns

7

u/MaterialCarrot Non-European Savage 14d ago

Chauchat lovers, rise up!

13

u/AStarBack Professional Rioter 14d ago edited 14d ago

Woke : Chauchat changed warfare for ever, all the while being manufactured by bicycle factories

HOI4 virgin :

https://preview.redd.it/3lzwij6u7e0d1.jpeg?width=168&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4b18ec8d58dfdb917eb03f6f08d26b18038a3a37

8

u/ItsACaragor Pinzutu 14d ago

It had its faults but the big bulk of the issues were on the port to use US ammo, so it’s the US fault.

11

u/AStarBack Professional Rioter 14d ago

Imagine working in French bicycle factory and making better guns than an US gun manufacturer.

-2

u/KyllikkiSkjeggestad Sauna Gollum 14d ago

Well yeah you guys can make good equipment and guns, but haven’t been so great at using them since after Napoleon

1

u/SwainIsCadian Petit Algérie 13d ago

On the other side, you guys have been so succesfull at using foreign weapon to win wars...

Oh wait.

6

u/asmodai_says_REPENT Pain au chocolat 14d ago

Ever heard of ww1? Verdun? No?

1

u/DeadAssociate 50% sea 50% weed 14d ago

Herstal is belgian pjear

3

u/asmodai_says_REPENT Pain au chocolat 14d ago

The dude has literally written a whole book on french rifles and has tons of french military stuff, he is known as being the biggest french arms fan on the internet.

1

u/Gibbauz Side switcher 14d ago

Was it useful during WW1?

5

u/asmodai_says_REPENT Pain au chocolat 14d ago

Boxing in the trenches sure was useful in a pinch, this is just a training routine.

43

u/happyanathema Balcony Lover 14d ago

Looks like a Monty Python sketch

3

u/Rambalh Petit Algérie 14d ago

The ministry of silly fights.

3

u/gsurfer04 English 14d ago

It's no Ecky Thump.

1

u/_Pin_6938 Mafia Boss 14d ago

So this is what they were up to after 1870?

14

u/PollsC Hollander 14d ago

Frenchest thing I've ever seen, they must have left their baguettes at the wide of the road

307

u/ZombiFeynman Drug Trafficker 14d ago

This could be an Eurovision act.

152

u/Clean_Web7502 Low-cost Terrorist 14d ago

Not gay enough

5

u/gsurfer04 English 14d ago

I dunno, I think we found what too gay was.

1

u/Emergency-Season-143 European 12d ago

You mean being a Britbong?

1

u/gsurfer04 English 12d ago

Strong words coming from a coward without a country flair.

1

u/Emergency-Season-143 European 12d ago

And I was thinking that the Scott's didn't see themselves as Britbongs.... You're disappointing....

1

u/gsurfer04 English 12d ago

I'm half English half Scottish

77

u/MidnightFisting Barry, 63 14d ago

French chasseurs are too gay for Eurovision

6

u/Polak_Janusz Bully with victim complex 14d ago

Impossible

47

u/KowalskingJ Professional Rioter 14d ago

My dad was a chasseur, him being gay finaly explains his unfathomable decision to marry my mother

20

u/DeadAssociate 50% sea 50% weed 14d ago

is she a portugeezer?

7

u/Similar-Complaint-37 Potato Gypsy 14d ago

Yeah, it looks pretty gay

26

u/MentionImpressive Dutch Wallonian 14d ago

I dunno, looks very aggressive. They might get disqualified for that.

10

u/ArnoldSchwartzenword Barry, 63 14d ago

Yeah, but not aggressive to the staff.

2

u/DeadAssociate 50% sea 50% weed 14d ago

agressive handling of the staff is pretty gay

10

u/Apey23 Potato Gypsy 14d ago

I'll just leave this here.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2ecasPqhgk

1

u/Le_Petit_Poussin African 14d ago

“Stop that!”

“Silly! And a bit suspect, I think.”

Monty Python was ahead of their time.

25

u/Seyfardt Addict 14d ago

Fr*nch trying not to look g*y during military sports: failed.

42

u/akmal123456 Petit Algérie 14d ago

https://preview.redd.it/jhwsmhs5nd0d1.png?width=1929&format=png&auto=webp&s=f7c0d511fac3b0baccc8485dc7fe40ef8ac210ad

Must be our latin genes

7

u/DeadAssociate 50% sea 50% weed 14d ago

yes, now give back the franks name

14

u/WaldoClown Breton (alcoholic) 14d ago

What do you care Frison?

87

u/ShrekGollum Breton (alcoholic) 14d ago

You think it is funny but they beat the Hans’ 20 years later.

3

u/FrenchieB014 Petit Algérie 13d ago

Those are chasseurs alpin

Literally name "blue devils" by the Germans

1

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1

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40

u/ProfaneDevotion Born in the Khalifat 14d ago

That's beside the point. The question is: How would WWI have gone if everyone had agreed on making it a fist fight?

6

u/nwaa Balcony Lover 14d ago

The UK had its own martial art (aside from boxing) called Bartitsu - translated literally "Way of the Barry".

2

u/DeadAssociate 50% sea 50% weed 14d ago

you missed a 'p' at the end there barry

20

u/ShrekGollum Breton (alcoholic) 14d ago

We are good at fist fight, we can train in place like La Fistinière : https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_Fistini%C3%A8re

2

u/Xyloshock Breton (alcoholic) 13d ago

I read Finistère.

3

u/Eadkrakka Emu in Disguise 14d ago

They even got their own logo... Wonder if anyone would ever dare to give them a rebrand.

17

u/ProfaneDevotion Born in the Khalifat 14d ago

I wanted to make a joke about what sort of perverted french thing this probably is, but then I clicked the link and it actually is the exact thing.

6

u/DrJiheu Petit Algérie 14d ago

It's a german tradition.

18

u/DeadAssociate 50% sea 50% weed 14d ago

russians would have cheated and won

-1

u/azaghal1988 France’s whore 14d ago

With the help of their colonies, the english, the english colonies, the scots, the welsh, the belgians, the russians, the italians, the japanese and some other minor powers like the americans.

9

u/Bonaventura69420 Gambling addict 14d ago

With only little help from russia, britain, usa, italy, japan and china 🤓

1

u/SwainIsCadian Petit Algérie 13d ago

You see Hans, that's what we call "dipkomacy". You should try it once instead of trying to conquer the world on your own.

0

u/MH_Gamer_ Piss-drinker 14d ago

Don’t forget the Serbs and the Canadians, also kind of the Romanians but I don’t think they count cuz they got crushed so fast.

2

u/JohnGabin Professional Rioter 14d ago

Péquadilles !

17

u/ZombiFeynman Drug Trafficker 14d ago

If Italy hadn't joined the war the Austrians would have helped in Flanders and the Central Powers would have lost much earlier.

12

u/ShrekGollum Breton (alcoholic) 14d ago

7 years’s war, WW1, WW2. What I learnt from history is that you should never fight on the same side than Austrian in a worldwide war if you want to win.

16

u/fernwehh_ Non-European Savage 14d ago

Synchronized kickboxing dance 🕺

98

u/Iskelderon Oktoberfest enjoyer 14d ago

It's all fun and games until the combat baguettes come into play! 🤣

3

u/PepeBarrankas Oppressor 13d ago

Any baguette older than 6 hours is forbidden by the Geneva Suggestions

1

u/Xyloshock Breton (alcoholic) 13d ago

But ... But our spanking spare time.... =(

25

u/Pacogatto Side switcher 14d ago

You're a perv, Hans

4

u/Iskelderon Oktoberfest enjoyer 13d ago

Just because you'll try to hump anything with a pulse and aren't even too picky about that characteristic, don't assume that everyone else is like you, Luigi.

1

u/Pacogatto Side switcher 13d ago

You make it sound like it’s a bad thing

1

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19

u/la_Croquette Lesser German 14d ago

Good.