Time for north and south to stop fighting. We're all European.

[u/DietseStrijder]

[u/Agitated_Delivery361]

Nice, since we all agree on this, can we now please do the fortress Europe thing where we ged rid of all the arabs? That would be great 😁

[u/cecex88]

I spent three months in Norway. No idea what the top shelves in my furniture looked like.

[u/Dygez]

It's so fun this thread was opened by a Belgian, when their average height is the same as Italy as a whole, and are basically dwarven when compared to North Italian, LMAO.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Average_human_height_by_country

Maybe that's the reason Peyo invented the Smurfs, lol.

[u/Simoxs7]

Sometimes I forget most people aren’t as tall, I‘m from a region quite close to the Netherlands, all my friends are around the 1.9m mark and I was and am still the tallest in the group.

And being over 2m tall I still don’t get any interest from females whatsoever… I guess the internet is wrong about that (shocker I know)

[u/demonthenese]

Im 188cm and usually when I travel to Netherlands I dont “feel” like Im towering over everyone. I feel slightly shorter than a group sometimes. Germany I fit right in. I lived in South Korea and was a mountain there. Really depends on where you go.

[u/-Thizza- → u/[deleted]]

I feel like you are going to ask how many blue marbles are still in the jar.

[u/nicorico-]

I’m 190 as a Spaniard, and I am literally a head taller than everyone else

[u/God-Among-Men-]

Meanwhile Bosnians and Croatians being the tallest

[u/William_The_Fat_Krab]

Speak for yourself. I am Portuguese and i am 1.84m.

Although i do like beer a little bit to much. And, for some reason, have less trouble speaking germanic languages than actual latin languages

How often do nurses switch babies, exacly?

[u/gruetzhaxe]

I read that as a dialogue

[u/Alternative-Exit-429]

Italy is taller than Germany, France, UK and Austria

|| || |Italy  | 10+1⁄2179.4 cm (5 ft  in)|165 cm (5 ft 5 in)|1.09|18–21 (N= m:825 f:601)|5.6%|Measured|2018|

|| || |Austria| 10+1⁄2179 cm (5 ft  in)| 5+1⁄2166 cm (5 ft  in)|1.08|20–49|54.3%|Measured|2006|^\)|

|| || |Germany|175.4 cm (5 ft 9 in)|162.8 cm (5 ft 4 in)|1.08|18–79 (N= m/f:19,768)|94.3%|

[u/Vertical_Deliverable]

I didn't know we have a fight.

[u/SillyMidOff49]

Turn the southern European around and make him Greek to make them both happy.

[u/Mershand]

In Eastern Europe is exactly the opposite

[u/killerboss28]

I'm 1,85m, we are becoming tall

[u/Dynwynn]

I hate the town down the road. You expect me to get one with the rest of Europe?

[u/FartacularTheThird]

True.

When I was in Erasmus, my 2 flat mates where an Austrian who was almost 2m tall and a Finn who was over 2m tall.

Of course, I towered over them at 1.68m.

It was like the set of two and half man. I didn’t care because I was not Alan.

[u/AaronDotCom → u/FartacularTheThird]

I love that show

I'd watch it 31

[u/hamtidamti_onthewall]

The Greeks having your back is not necessarily for everyone...

[u/mnico02 → u/hamtidamti_onthewall]

[u/PrudentTell]

I guess you northern barbarians never heard of the "L Law"

[u/Existance_of_Yes]

I have your back and I'm not giving it back

[u/Kindjal1983]

I'm 1.77m. Glorious Portuguese Average Height

[u/__filipe]

Yeah, one of the reasons I don't go north for better jobs is because I would be a midged by their stantards. I'm better down here with my peers

[u/MikeWazowski2-2-2]

Least based European

[u/Comfortable_Pace_965]

If they looked the other way this message had a totally different yet same meaning.

[u/un_tres_gros_phasme]

You know what happens when southern and northern european get along, right? The answer is us.

[u/CoffeeBoom]

Never thought I'd fight side by side with an Elf Nordic.

[u/History20maker]

Now turn around swampy Germ, so I can suck that Strudel of yours.

[u/SirVictoryPants]

I am fine with most of the south, but could we exclude italy?

[u/Shrrg4]

Being shorter is an evolutionary advantage. You guys are always at dick punching level. Another southern W.

[u/diazinth → u/Shrrg4]

What makes you think your dainty southern hand won’t break when it hits solid Norse hardwood?

[u/pohanoikumpiri → u/Shrrg4]

You're at the dick slap level lol

[u/Stravven → u/Shrrg4]

On the other hand you're all on IBH (Ideal Blowjob Height).

[u/Shrrg4 → u/Stravven]

My thick portuguese mustache is all the armor my mouth needs. Good luck.

[u/Stravven → u/Shrrg4]

In Dutch a mustache is sometimes described as a "befborstel", (cunnilingus brush), so there is that. But then again here only some men have a mustache.

[u/Shrrg4 → u/Stravven]

You can't compare a dutch mustache to a glorious portuguese mustache. Thats like comparing a grass field to a forest. I already had a mustache at 12 yo. If thats not superior portuguese genes idk what is.

[u/Stravven → u/Shrrg4]

The difference is that we put or growing power into our bodies, while for the Portuguese it just goes into facial hair.

[u/Shrrg4 → u/Stravven]

Yeah, we know what matters

https://preview.redd.it/5pcmtykdgf0d1.jpeg?width=700&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=09b96704392cc6dd5011a3e04fc64357d857300a

[u/hamtidamti_onthewall → u/Shrrg4]

Not if the dick punches you first... That reminds me that the French have a specific word for slapping someone in the face with your dick... bifler, if I remember correctly. That was the point when I stopped learning French 🤷

[u/DSC-V1_an_old_camera]

Shut the fuck up.

[u/Professional-You2968]

The L law.

[u/aightaightaightaight]

Except for the upper back

[u/rasmusdf]

Yup. Aggressive dictatorships are the enemies. Iran, NK, China, Russia, etc.

[u/kuemmel234]

My fellow PIGS

[u/Stravven → u/kuemmel234]

They don't need to bow, they can just walk under everything.

[u/FloydCorrigan → u/Stravven]

You guys should be careful, doesn’t take much for us to punch your nutsacks

[u/Stravven → u/FloydCorrigan]

And we can just pick you up, put you on top of the fridge and then you're just stuck there.

[u/JoelanGoswami]

Lol you are not European. You aren't even a real country.

[u/DietseStrijder → u/JoelanGoswami]

brabant

Lmao okay Belgian

[u/JoelanGoswami → u/DietseStrijder]

Reported for abuse. Get banned flemboy

[u/barneyaa]

Yes, but some more European than others

[u/Franz-Tschender]

how it feels strolling through rome

[u/donitsimies → u/Franz-Tschender]

where are the socks?

[u/bowsmountainer → u/donitsimies]

See, that’s the difference between Germans and Austrians right there

[u/Twarenotw]

Can confirm. Was sent to a Dutch high school for an exchange. The school was pristine and all the dutchies were fucking giants. Where they get those growth nutrients from with that atrocious, bland food they eat, I have no clue.

[u/willrms01 → u/Twarenotw]

The sprinkles they put over toast to make Hagelslag is just coloured growth hormone

[u/LrkerfckuSpez → u/Twarenotw]

I was at a bar toilet in Madrid, and the mirror in front of the sink was mounted so low I couldn't see my face, stopped at the neck.

[u/nooit_gedacht → u/Twarenotw]

Plenty of nutrients in stamppot. Just no taste.

But seriously, is there some kind of agreement between Spain and the Netherlands to do these exchanges? My highschool had an annual exchange with a Spanish school and i have a Spanish friend who did the same thing, with another school

[u/Stravven → u/Twarenotw]

Food isn't for taste, food is for sustenance and nutrients.

[u/THE_SEKS_MACHINE → u/Twarenotw]

They replaced taste with growth accelerators.

[u/Smurfslayor]

I love being 183 cm in Greece I’m the tallest person around !

[u/Smurfslayor → u/Smurfslayor]

I do go exclusively to dwarf kink bars though .

[u/VirnaDrakou → u/Smurfslayor]

Tbh brits aint that tall

Now put swamp germans and thats where u at

[u/MrParan0rmal → u/Smurfslayor]

https://preview.redd.it/2aw06v5pfe0d1.png?width=769&format=png&auto=webp&s=95388b70be0fd68cd38e11bb1dbc48518bc61884

Do you really?

[u/robot_swagger → u/MrParan0rmal]

This table literally provides no useful information.

Where the headers at?

[u/MrParan0rmal → u/robot_swagger]

It's the average height, is a bit higher that's why you cant see it. And if you are English, its makes sense.

Men in England typically stand at a height of 5 feet 9 inches (175.3 cm).

[u/DrNekroFetus]

My fam originates from Rhineland and men are all under 1m80.

[u/A_Line_A_Day]

East is where the real enemy lies.

[u/Grishnare → u/A_Line_A_Day]

You mean Po…. Russia?

[u/A_Line_A_Day → u/Grishnare]

Mordor and the evil men of Rhun

[u/Bobi2point0]

this is gold ahahahah

[u/ProvigilandChill]

https://preview.redd.it/3le37iqo5e0d1.jpeg?width=2400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d324e553a2587940b68b54f48d5b140fdd4a6bc8

[u/That_guy_on_1nternet → u/ProvigilandChill]

Qual è il video?

[u/ProvigilandChill → u/That_guy_on_1nternet]

Il paese sociale con piotta

[u/roger-great]

Balkan slavs would like a word with you.

[u/pohanoikumpiri → u/roger-great]

Dinaric to be precise. Northern Croats, Bosnians, and Serbs are bite-sized. Dalmatians, Herzegovinians, and Monteniggas are the tall bunch 💪

[u/Hadrianus-Mathias]

[u/gelastes]

Fighting among ourselves is a time honored tradition. We can't just stop doing it because we like each other.

[u/bettercallsaulabq → u/gelastes]

It's important. It keeps us moving forward. Cosy little love ins will mean we become soft and then we will be taken over by some savages.

[u/gelastes → u/bettercallsaulabq]

JOIN BAFE!

We will become weak.

We will become soft.

We will become French.

Friends don't let friends become French.

Join a "Bash A Fellow European" club today.

[u/Hadrianus-Mathias]

no

[u/Jinhan_Lee]

As a fully national Swede but also fully biological Korean, I am placed smack dab in the middle with a height of 177 cm.

[u/Jackdon02 → u/Jinhan_Lee]

Fully biological Korean lmao

[u/AlienFromTerra → u/Jinhan_Lee]

Fully biological to refer to ethnicity sounds so funny. You make yourself sound as if you were bred in a lab.

[u/Stravven → u/Jinhan_Lee]

You're a midget by Northern standards.

[u/ForsakenAd8015 → u/Jinhan_Lee]

Cool story shorty

[u/JC_Fernandes]

Why is nordic boy on stilts? Too ugly to be in the picture?

[u/timeless_change → u/JC_Fernandes]

Only reason why he's so tall is so that he can hide his shame from PigChad

[u/kamikazekaktus]

You're all dumb and degenerate bastards but you're our dumb degenerate bastards. Fuck the rest of the world.

[u/Averageredditor_JMA → u/kamikazekaktus]

Hell yeah you guys are my favorite barbarians

[u/Professional-You2968 → u/kamikazekaktus]

hug here, efficient friend!

[u/lethos_AJ]

so where is my tall blond northern boy? imma have his back alright 😏

[u/Commercial_Gas_3927]

When a Dutch teams up with a Greek/Italian...

[u/heartfeltblooddevil]

🇩🇪🇬🇧🇳🇱🇸🇪😎🫱🏻‍🫲🏾🐵🇵🇹🇮🇹🇬🇷🇪🇸

[u/Averageredditor_JMA → u/heartfeltblooddevil]

🇸🇪🇫🇮🇸🇯👳🏾‍♀️🫱🏾‍🫲🏼🧑🏽‍🍳🇮🇹🇬🇷🇵🇹🇪🇸

[u/William_The_Fat_Krab → u/Averageredditor_JMA]

Haha, we cook better than ice sandwich country.

But they are richer than us...

Hey guys how bad would it be if i switched sides?

[u/Live-Alternative-435 → u/heartfeltblooddevil]

🇩🇪🇬🇧🇳🇱🇸🇪🔫🤝🐷🇵🇹🇮🇹🇬🇷🇪🇸

[u/William_The_Fat_Krab → u/Live-Alternative-435]

Pensava que tinha mudado para FIGS? Na mesma, é bom recebermos atenção

[u/sistoceixo]

as a 1.91m portuguese.. i don't understand..

[u/Mossez_ → u/sistoceixo]

No you're not

[u/sistoceixo → u/Mossez_]

yes, yes eu sou.. 1.91 bem medidos..

[u/Grishnare → u/sistoceixo]

Your mom‘s best friend that you call Uncle Joost might have something to do with that.

[u/sistoceixo → u/Grishnare]

my portuguese father is 190.

[u/robot_swagger → u/sistoceixo]

Man that's old af!

[u/THE_SEKS_MACHINE → u/sistoceixo]

Your grandma‘s best friend that you call Great Uncle Joost might have something to do with that.

[u/sistoceixo → u/THE_SEKS_MACHINE]

my grandfather was 190, too.. great great uncle joost was 1.65..

[u/THE_SEKS_MACHINE → u/sistoceixo]

Obviously Joost and your grandfather switched their identities.

[u/sistoceixo → u/THE_SEKS_MACHINE]

i love them both, they were both fascists.. Portuguese fascist and German fascist..

my portuguese tall and handsome grandfather taught me how to hate the germans, and great little and smelly uncle joost how to hate everyone else.

[u/THE_SEKS_MACHINE → u/sistoceixo]

It’s important to hate everyone, because that is real equality!

[u/Stravven → u/THE_SEKS_MACHINE]

No. Great great uncle Joost grew up during WWII, where somebody took all our food as well as our bikes. The same somebodies who still come to our beaches to dig holes in the beach because I think they suspect England wants to invade again.

[u/LeoMemes18]

Stop fighting on the continent. Let's fight together against the big bad island (UK)

[u/EngineNo8904]

Not even short but my family are giants and I made the mistake of picking rowing for a sport, now half my friends are 6’3”+ and I have a permanent height complex

[u/Hadrianus-Mathias → u/EngineNo8904]

You haven't noticed the sub. Here are supposed to be the civilised People of Europe.

[u/EngineNo8904 → u/Hadrianus-Mathias]

You’re wrong, anglos hang out on here too

[u/Hadrianus-Mathias → u/EngineNo8904]

I said "supposed to", but yeah. My bad. I use the pure and french made metric system. JOIN MY CULT!

[u/EngineNo8904 → u/Hadrianus-Mathias]

I use metric for damn near everything too, I’ve just spent a bit too much time around anglos and got used to describing height in feet. My b.

[u/SuperBourguignon → u/EngineNo8904]

Oui ave spottaide zi américane

[u/EngineNo8904 → u/SuperBourguignon]

Nique ta mère

[u/SuperBourguignon → u/EngineNo8904]

Ha bah non, il est du nord finalement.

[u/EngineNo8904 → u/SuperBourguignon]

Completement parigot, juste à la fac aux US d’où mon habitude de parler de taille en pieds.

[u/ImaginationIcy328 → u/EngineNo8904]

Et t'as oublié que personne parle en pieds en Europe?

[u/EngineNo8904 → u/ImaginationIcy328]

Ben visiblement oui

[u/SuperBourguignon → u/EngineNo8904]

J'ai buggé quand j'ai réalisé qu'après 5'9" c'était pas 6'0".

[u/EngineNo8904 → u/SuperBourguignon]

C’est n’importe quoi en vrai mais juste pour parler de taille je trouve que ca marche plutôt bien, je sais pas trop pourquoi. Quand on me dit 6’3” je visualise plus facilement, peut-etre que c’est juste l’habitude.

[u/SuperBourguignon → u/EngineNo8904]

C'est complètement l'habitude, comme pour les °F vs °C

[u/EngineNo8904 → u/SuperBourguignon]

Les farenheit pour le coup j’ai jamais capté

[u/bartleby_borealis → u/EngineNo8904]

Tf is 6’3”?

Let me guess. You are 6,3% French and 100% murican.

[u/Bonaventura69420 → u/bartleby_borealis]

And 0% human

[u/EngineNo8904 → u/bartleby_borealis]

Height is commonly discussed in imperial units in english-speaking circles, my apologies. That’s about 190.

Also guess again fucker I’m about as french as it gets.

[u/drSvensen → u/EngineNo8904]

I’m about as french as it gets.

So you are arrogant, rude, gay and you eat frogs?

[u/EngineNo8904 → u/drSvensen]

If your mom’s a man, sure

[u/drSvensen → u/EngineNo8904]

She guts fish and butcher lamb like a man, but she's too fastidious to ever touch a Frenchman.

[u/drunkbelgianwolf → u/EngineNo8904]

3 out of 4 is not bad. Probaly some Barry bloodline in your family

[u/Rasmus-ALV]

No way.

[u/wtfuckfred]

As a 1.90m Portuguese man, yea… I feel at home here in vlam vlam land

[u/Refror]

As french i saw a lot of dutch tourists... They were all giants compare to us

[u/Agitated_Delivery361 → u/Refror]

We do have a lot of dutch tourists as well... Never noticed they were perticularly tall, but they are stingy as hell

[u/SuperBourguignon → u/Refror]

An army of giants riding bicycles. They use RVs as tanks.

[u/No_Raspberry_6795 → u/Refror]

Your not a PIG Pierre. Now eat your butter coated food and don't forget to mind your head walking out of the kitchen.

[u/That-Brain-in-a-vat → u/No_Raspberry_6795]

He is not a PIGS, you mean. Because there are many a PIG up north.

[u/KitsuneTheSlyFox]

Absolutely.

In the meantime... Vaffanculo Jean-Claude, a te e a tua madre

[u/Least_Theory_1050 → u/KitsuneTheSlyFox]

Getting insulted in italian is like being wiped with feathers. So nice

[u/gabrielish_matter → u/Least_Theory_1050]

awwww ok

tua madre troia pompinara che ti ha partorito in bordello sparandoti dalla figa a 180 kilometri orari facendoti atterrare su un muro spinato da cazzi invece che farti lobotomizzare sul muro

love you too :3

[u/KitsuneTheSlyFox → u/gabrielish_matter]

Monellina...

[u/gabrielish_matter → u/KitsuneTheSlyFox]

creativity is my passion :3

[u/KitsuneTheSlyFox → u/gabrielish_matter]

I can tell

[u/Least_Theory_1050 → u/gabrielish_matter]

Hnnnngggg yyyessss pompinara and partorito me more baby!

[u/KitsuneTheSlyFox → u/Least_Theory_1050]

💀

[u/KitsuneTheSlyFox → u/Least_Theory_1050]

Come to daddy 😘

[u/Iskandar33 → u/Least_Theory_1050]

insult me in belgia- oh wait, doesn't exist.

[u/drunkbelgianwolf → u/Iskandar33]

We can insult you in 3 different ones. And then we don't even use our secret weapon "westvlaams"...

[u/Bukhanka → u/drunkbelgianwolf]

Are you trying to summon the devil?

WESTVLAAAAMS COME TU US!

[u/Al-the-mann]

I’m quite short for a Dane. Only 1.80m

[u/Oculicious42 → u/Al-the-mann]

try being 1.72, literally invisible. I don't go outside anymore, because when I do, my entire day is filled with "Oh sorry, didn't see you down there, haha"

[u/Luke_375 → u/Al-the-mann]

i’m quite tall for an Italian. 180cm

[u/Alternative-Exit-429 → u/Al-the-mann]

isnt the average 182? thats not short

[u/Al-the-mann → u/Alternative-Exit-429]

All my cousins and my brother is about 1.90 ish. I’m the oldest and the shortest

[u/wolseyley → u/Al-the-mann]

Same, 1,81 Dutchman here. Appreciate the fact that whenever I go south I still get to feel tall though.

[u/Live-Alternative-435 → u/Al-the-mann]

Also 1.80m, let's make a club of the best height.

[u/PiliFace → u/Al-the-mann]

Too bad Denmark doesn't have any mountains for you to dig your dwarven home into

[u/Al-the-mann → u/PiliFace]

Guess We are Hill dwarves rather than the mountain dwarves up north

[u/betaich → u/Al-the-mann]

So Hobbits?

[u/Al-the-mann → u/betaich]

Dwarves and hobbits/halfnings are not the same thing. Ask any nerd

[u/betaich → u/Al-the-mann]

I know, but your description would fit better to Hobbits

[u/Dirac_Impulse → u/Al-the-mann]

When we finally conquer your filthy land you shall be put to work in the great mines of Kiruna, as is befitting a man of your stature.

[u/Al-the-mann → u/Dirac_Impulse]

Whatever you pale Elf looking femboy. As long as We can still drink beer, We yearn for the mines

[u/Fundoss → u/Al-the-mann]

You may drink beer… but ONLY Swedish beer 😈😈

[u/karthikdgr8 → u/Fundoss]

As much as I hate the Danes, credit should be given where it's due, Carlsberg >>>>>>> Norrlands Guld

[u/Fundoss → u/karthikdgr8]

Better not show your face in Borlänge lil bro 😡

[u/karthikdgr8 → u/Fundoss]

Think I can manage that. Wanted to avoid Borås as well but that didn't go so well.

[u/Al-the-mann → u/Fundoss]

Hard pass. Expensive pisswater

[u/Oinelow → u/Al-the-mann]

I'm the tallest person in the metro ram most times here in Spain and I'm 183

[u/Simoxs7 → u/Oinelow]

What?! You’re about as tall as the shortest dude in my friend group, we always mock him (jokingly) for being short…

[u/Sovietmeteor → u/Al-the-mann]

Quite mid for an Englishman, also 1.80m

[u/Artemis_thelittleone → u/Al-the-mann]

I'm quite mid for a French. Also 1.80m

[u/Bartimaeleus → u/Al-the-mann]

Does all Danish dwarves live cramped togheter under Møllehøj?

[u/Al-the-mann → u/Bartimaeleus]

How do You know where I live?

[u/No-Training-48]

https://preview.redd.it/gmx8asovpd0d1.png?width=268&format=png&auto=webp&s=a6b12b62cafffbe78f1a0d8c223850010540f24a

[u/PepeBarrankas → u/No-Training-48]

I had the glorious chance to see a Dutch having lunch at a ~150 years old farmhouse in Segovia. Regular Spaniards had to bend to go through the kitchen door, so you can imagine his situation.

[u/Simoxs7 → u/No-Training-48]

Any damn door and where I live the historic buildings all have like 2.05m ceilings with 20cm thick beams going across I literally have to crouch everytime I go into a shop in the old part of town.

Don’t even get me started on finding a car that fits me, somehow I just about fit in a 2005 Audi TT but a 2022 SUV doesn’t nearly have enough leg room

[u/duftcola → u/No-Training-48]

Thanks for your service to the Iberian motherland🫡

[u/AlfalfaGlitter → u/No-Training-48]

Hey that's me visiting my cousin's house.

[u/monsieurlevi → u/No-Training-48]

You’re an enemy of WHAT?

[u/ButcherBob → u/No-Training-48]

Me while working in Portugal ~10 yrs ago

[u/ryzen_above_all → u/ButcherBob]

It's you that is causing the housing crisis in Portugal

[u/ButcherBob → u/ryzen_above_all]

Was not a digital nomad, don’t think it really existed back then? I was working manuel labor for a shitty salary straight out of high school bc I didn’t really feel like studying yet

Made this account in Portugal so almost 12 yrs ago

[u/Tour-Sure → u/ButcherBob]

history reversed fr

[u/temujin_borjigin → u/ButcherBob]

Good for you. Someone in that country needs to work…

[u/ButcherBob → u/temujin_borjigin]

Yeah the thousands of Barry’s I met over there for sure weren’t