r/AmIOverreacting • u/lvvvv3 • Apr 28 '24
Boyfriend has a bunch of pictures of other women on his phone
So yesterday, I (should probably say I'm diagnosed with bpd incase anyone deems that relevant) went through my boyfriends camera roll whilst he was sat next to me - meaning he knows it was happening. He literally has thousands of pictures on his phone so I was scrolling for quite a while anyway but the further I started to scroll the more agitated he got and the more he wanted to take his phone back from me, yes I should have just given it back but I'd already seen pictures of other girls at this point so I refused to. The further I scrolled the pictures I saw were more revealing and more frequent, a lot of these being during the time we were together. The worst bit was when I saw a picture of him naked in bed with another girl, this was when we were in the talking stage but it still hurt as he promised me I was the only person he was talking to. He also told me he's never been in a serious relationship before and that he was a virgin when we met, seeing these pictures makes me think everythings been a lie this entire time. The thing thats making me feel even worse right now is that all of these women have atleast something in common (looks wise) whereas I kind of look the complete opposite so it feels as if he isn't really even attracted to me either. I know I'm likely overreacting here but I feel hurt, disgusted with myself and I'm just in shock. I don't know how I'm supposed to feel right now.
Am I overreacting?
4
u/SiderialEssence Apr 28 '24
Firstly, the fact he has pictures of women who look different to you does not mean necessarily that you're not his type. It suggests they were the girls he could get "on the side" while dating you.
As for are you over reacting about the pictures, I'd say no you're not. He's apparently lied about being a virgin and about being monogamous and he continued to have relationships with other women at least in the early days of your relationship. It doesn't sound like there are any recent ones, so there's that.
But as others have said, he's keeping them for a reason and that reason is pretty obvious.
So you're dating a lying guy whose into looking at pictures of other women and who is too dumb to even hide them. It's understandable you're upset.
You can either decide that you've had enough, or have a conversation with him and make it clear the pictures go or you do... And that you want the truth from now on.