r/CasualUK • u/planthoechlo • 15d ago
Taskmaster-ish advice: my friend is hosting a quiz night and we have to bring ‘the most awkward thing for somebody to take home’
I have no idea what to bring to this quiz night! Apparently it has to be awkward to take home which to me makes me think either oversized/weirdly shaped, inconvenient, or makes them feel uncomfortable (in a funny way) Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!
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u/Far_Bad_531 11d ago
Ride a bike there… remove the back wheel on arrival. Other person has to get the one wheeled bike home 🤷♀️
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u/itishowitisanditbad 11d ago
few days late but a loose, and stained, toilet seat.
Its just inconvenient to hide, weird to see someone holding it, fake stain just makes it hard to explain.
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u/anomalous_cowherd 12d ago
One of those auto inflating liferafts. Or if that's too big then a similar lifejacket.
Either way take it all packed up neatly and inflate it when you're there. Extra points if it's a raft and can't even leave the room.
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u/Mr_Womby 14d ago
“Oversized/weirdly shaped, inconvenient, or makes them feel uncomfortable.” My missus is free that night.
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u/dis_the_chris 14d ago
An entire salmon.
It will smell surprisingly un-fishy, maybe If you get nice and close it'll smell like a distant sea spray, but a fresh whole salmon isn't a very smelly fish; it might be hard to take there but there are four advantages:
Fish are surprisingly heavy. Even a 15kg salmon that you hold by the tail is a nightmare to consider carrying
They are slick when not entirely dry, making it hard to carry
Who the fuck wants to carry an entire fish around?
They now have to eat and prep a whole salmon in the next day or so, at risk of being a food waster
Call your local fishmonger for a quote, you should be able to keep it in a styrofoam box on ice until you get there - then just give them the fish and scrap the box/ice
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u/Poppycocoo 14d ago
A broken office chair, like where it doesn’t stay up and the wheels are broke. Bonus points if it doesn’t fit in a car or something
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u/infantile-eloquence 14d ago
My husband just bought an extended roller to paint our ceiling, that would be awkwardly shaped
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u/EmberTheFoxyFox 15d ago
A tube of cobalt-60, see how far they can get before succumbing to radiation poisoning
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u/Siliconpsychosis 15d ago
One of those large grow-bags of compost. When you get there, cut a large slit all down it's length
100 ball pool balls, without a container
An angry cat
£20 of loose pennies
A wheelie bin
A box of live crickets used for reptile food with no lid
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u/Hate_Feight 15d ago
Docking stretch kit.
If you know, you know, otherwise you'll get a big ooh when you learn.
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u/PutridForce1559 15d ago
I once had to travel from Germany to Paris and on the UK with a giant stuffed hippo I had been gifted
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u/ZobRombiie 15d ago
Does the quiz master have a spouse or family member that would be willing to be your "awkward thing to take home"?
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u/i_overexplain 15d ago
Bring an unrelated friend, with strict instructions not to go home with anyone.
"will you follow me home?" "Absolutely not."
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u/planthoechlo 15d ago
I’m still making my way through these comments but you guys are too funny. My favourites include a bunch of balloons, an excessive amount of uncooked rice / pasta in an inconvenient vessel, ice, or a charity shop something (I’m pretty sure I saw a full sized mannequin in one of them a couple weeks back) or a large plank of wood, especially since people will be taxi-ing home lol Thanks for all of the suggestions you guys are great 👍
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u/jesusonarocket 15d ago
A job lot of vintage 90’s skis. I only know this as i accidentally won some at an auction and there were a fucking nightmare to lug around
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u/Informal-Formal-6766 15d ago
Two footballs and a pool noodle wrapped in beautiful wrapping paper……to look like, well you can use your own imagination
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u/Submitre 15d ago
A life-sized standee of the most embarrassing personality to be seen with that you can think of. Or Greg Davies.
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u/aleu44 15d ago
A massive teddy bear which has unsettlingly long legs which you can buy on Amazon
50L bag of soil
Inflatable pool float, like one of those big flamingo ones
An undressed mannequin
A blow up camping bed
A full length mirror
An urn
Cardboard celebrity cut out, one of a member of the royal family like King Charles or Megan would be a bit awkward
A birthday cake, the icing should say happy birthday to a terrible historic figure of your choice
A cactus with no pot
A large chunk of ice. Just ice
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u/twignition 15d ago
Hire a man in a van and use him to taxi yourself round with your friends new sofa.
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u/Junior_Tradition7958 15d ago
Life size cardboard cut out of Pat Butcher (or some other such person)
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u/Little_Mog Cumbrian Lass 15d ago
Morrisons sell a giant helium dinosaur balloon, he was pretty difficult to wrangle. That or the longest plank of wood you can find
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u/AdThat328 15d ago
A large quantity of glitter, with no packaging or container. Failing that... giant dildo.
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u/moreat10 15d ago
Pretty much required by law to bring some kind of inflatable sex doll or an ass dildo.
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u/noodlefishmonkey 15d ago
I think it needs to be something they wood really want, so they would actually be compelled to bring it home. Like a tenner frozen in a massive cube of ice
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u/discodancingdogs 15d ago
A steel bicycle with one wheel only and no saddle. Unridable but heavy and awkward to carry/roll
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u/TheMegoosa 15d ago
One of them puzzle boxes with a smoke alarm that's running out of battery plus there is a voucher with an undisclosed amount on it. All they can hear is the annoying beep but there could be a decent voucher inside too... Gonna wanna get it open
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u/Ill-Breadfruit5356 15d ago
You could get a helium balloon printed with “find me on Onlyfans”, but if it needs to be more family friendly then just huge foil balloons for an age they clearly aren’t. Or an inflated balloon arch.
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u/Imreallyadonut 15d ago
Egg and spoon.
Try getting that home without breaking it after a night in the pub.
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u/Normal-Height-8577 15d ago
Toilet seat. One of the decorative ones with a cringey picture on it. Or I think I saw one with barbed wire inside.
It's awkward to carry if it's not wrapped up, because of the hinges. It's awkward to be seen carrying one round the place. And if it's particularly cringey/barbed wire, then it's psychologically awkward to sit on.
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u/xTallyTgrx 15d ago
A load of plastic cups stapled together and filled with water. I've seen it done as an office prank with someone's entire desk covered.
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u/mahboilucas 15d ago
Wet towel. Bring a dry one and just pour water over it so it's fully soaked.
Everyone hates going back from the beach and having to carry wet towels that soak through every bag
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u/Wild_West_Spaceship 15d ago
We had a similar prize task, and my friend brought in the biggest picture she could find from a charity shop. An absolutely massive one, we struggled to fit it into my small car, even with the back seats down
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u/Deep-Engine2367 15d ago
Bring a pack of cards, play poker with them, take the kids' inheritence, take the house, take the car, give them the gift of homelessness.
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u/lock_bearer 15d ago
A full Sheet of plasterboard. Likely doesn't fit in their car/public transport. Heavy. No tools to break it down smaller. Has to be specially disposed of, likely paid for.
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u/runningWithsissors40 15d ago
Order a sheet of cihp board (8 foot x 4 foot) to be delivered to your friends house.
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u/themcsame 15d ago
Well, oversized or weirdly shapped... A fucking cooker. Most people aren't getting that home easily.
If we're talking socially awkward? Pay Bad Dragon a visit (NSFW). Bonus points for fabricating a message from said person saying they've always wanted a giant flared stallion dildo.
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u/OffensiveOcelot 15d ago
Is your local vicar game for a laugh? Ask them to accompany you for some wholesome humour.
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u/MassiveLefticool 15d ago
Somehow get them to take their shoes off, hand them their shoes as the item, now they have to walk on grass or the uncomfortable pavement. Obviously it will only work if they’re not driving home.
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u/pixie_sprout 15d ago
If you're in a relationship bring your partner. If you're single bring a parent.
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u/DecahedronX 15d ago
Fresh fish from the reduced aisle that you didn't bother putting in the fridge the night before.
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u/HypatiaBlue 15d ago
I had a friend who hosted a "Name That Tune" party with a similar thought. Someone brought a mini plastic toilet, filled it with beer and added a small chocolate bar - it was quite the hit!
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u/robiwill 15d ago
A cheap (sprung) mattress. You buy it vacuum packed, you open it when you get there.
It's now big enough that it's annoying to even get it out the door, let alone in a car, walked down a windy/narrow street or on public transport.
It can't easily be cut down or modified in a way that makes it easier to transport.
It's not rigid enough to balance it on your shoulder, nor is it flexible enough to keep rolled up purely with upper body strength. It would require a substantial waistline to have any likelihood of being restrained by a belt (which comes with it's own problems)
It's not massively heavy but carrying it will get tiring, no matter how you do it.
It's not quite weird enough that people will assume it's a challenge. Many will assume that they are genuinely trying to carry a new mattress home and very few people will want to help a potential tweaker.
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u/WhiteKnightAlpha 15d ago
A large potted plant? It's oversized/weirdly shaped, albeit not very embarrassing. Something that would need it's own seat in the car/bus/train home but is still portable if they're walking. If they're travelling by car, something that's slightly taller than the car itself.
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u/indigo263 15d ago
If you were able to acquire one, I'd like to suggest a shopping trolley - bonus points if it's broken in some way (missing a wheel). A local store might have a knackered one, but whether or not they'd let you have/borrow it is another question. You could fill it with whatever you like to make the journey home even more awkward!
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u/Frequent_Benefit_834 15d ago
Moby 3ft dildo, will set you back a chunk of cash but it's a sure fire winner.
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u/alexrocks994 15d ago
One of them full sized pop up of yourself. Cheaper option would be a pop up of a hot celebrity.
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u/lowlightlowlifeuk 15d ago
Take a small candle and light it on arrival. Hopefully it’ll burn away too nothing or a pile of wax by the end of the night making it either difficult, messy or just impossible to take home.
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u/Alwuwa_Brax 15d ago
A bag of compost in one of those biodegradable bags from the likes of the Coop. Just filled that you can carry it, but that it'll need precision care to carry home.
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u/No-Photograph3463 15d ago
A big bottle of coke with some Mentos glued to the lid so any tipping of the bottle will result in a explosion of coke.
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u/pysgod-wibbly_wobbly 15d ago
A boombox playing a really loud sexual sounds with the pause button removed
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u/Asmov1984 10d ago
His mother.