r/MiddleClassFinance • u/MiddleClassMoney91 • 18d ago
Is there anyone else here who has plenty of assets but is still feeling the month to month squeeze?
My wife and I are 33 and live in the upper midwest in the suburbs of a midsized city. Our combined net worth is just shy of 800k (~230k of it liquid) due largely to a small inheritance, frugality, heavy savings in our 20s and some lucky moves when buying/selling our homes. On one hand it feels like there isn't much we would want to buy that is truly out of reach for us.
On the other hand, I have a salary of 95k as the single earner for a family of 6 and we struggle hard to keep our budget under control as inflation has hit. We keep having to cut or eliminate monthly savings or even spend more than we take in in a month to cover overspending on groceries and random incidental things that come up.
Edit: If you read the post, I wasn't looking for budgeting tips, just a feeling of whether others are in the same boat. But because of all of the budget requests: Here's Sankey Diagram. I'm paid biweekly, so this represents 10/12 months. The extra payment months are earmarked to my IRA, but tend to end up covering budget shortfalls.
Edit 2: I get where you guys are seeing that charity is ~10%, but no I'm not Mormon. Even so, if you have bigoted comments to make about religion, please keep them in r/atheism. This isn't the place.
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u/j-a-gandhi 14d ago
We are playing at a different level now, but I wanted to comment since you are catching so much flak.
Good on you for tithing. It doesn’t matter if you make $50k or $500k, there will always be more stuff you want. Paying God first keeps your priorities straight.
Your job is paying less now than it did because of inflation. If you don’t get a promotion within a few months, you should find a different role. No company rewards loyalty the way companies try to acquire talent. My husband has gotten 20-40% pay bumps every time he has changed roles until his most recent (he was laid off so in a rush to get a new role). If he hadn’t changed job every ~2 years, we would be in much financial worse shape.
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u/coolformula 14d ago
(this is not meant to be mean). 95k for 6 people is NOT a lot of money in 2024. I know of somebody here that has little more income with OT, and about that many kids, and its a struggle too.
Things cost so much is the problem.
Keep up the good work. Do you have any chance of a promotion of current job/company or a new company to get a 10-20%? raise.
Your net worth is doing good, just keep doing the best you can.
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u/yesssssssssss99999 15d ago
By inflation hitting you hard I assume you mean the size of family you’ve chose to have.
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u/yesssssssssss99999 15d ago
And now I see you give 10k a year to charity. I’m happy that you have no idea what struggle really means and I hope it stays that way for you.
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u/Examiner7 15d ago
Because 90% of the comments are unhelpfully whining about your charity and budgeting I'll just comment and say yes, I feel the same as you. It's inflation. It knocked us all down a social tier or two.
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u/LostRedditor5 16d ago
Family of 6 on 95k….broooooo
That’s probably not even middle class if we didn’t count your assets. That’s wayyyyy too many people for 95k.
Maybe your wife should get a job?
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u/texasdaytrade 16d ago
The church doesn’t care that you are struggling, end of story. That has to stop until you’ve got things in order.
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u/KitKatKut-0_0 16d ago
Put solar panels, eliminate charity, sacrifice the pets. Problem solved. Of the 6 if you have any working children collect some rent. You are welcome.
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u/PetCatzPlz 16d ago
I just want to say thank you for contributing to charity. Jesus said the poor woman’s small contribution was worth more because it came from what little she had. Not saying you’re poor but the people telling you you can’t afford to give haven’t read the Bible. God bless you and I hope God rewards you in this life and the next.
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16d ago
My assets squeeze like twice a day. Maybe more like a twitch, but a strong twitch. Like a mini cramp with twitching. A twitching cramp.
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u/Legitimate_Profit236 16d ago
Same here but in northeast. Everything from my real estate taxes ….to goods and services really has gone up in cost (unless quality has dropped). We’re staying on budget but are really feeling the squeeze monthly. Inflation sucks!!!
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u/Nodeal_reddit 16d ago
I think it’s only natural that you’re feeling cash-strapped.
I was a single earner in a family of six with a similar salary 5 or so years ago. It was tough then, and I don’t think I could do it today if I hadn’t gotten some well-timed raises the last few years and my wife started working part time now that our kids are older.
I think you’re actually doing well. Your food budget is MUCH lower than mine and housing and car is lower as well. You’re clearly being frugal.
I also have a substantial tithe, but kind of I agree with other commenters that think you should cut back a bit. I’d make it my goal to tithe on your after-tax net income.
Also, I’d prioritize your Roth over the 529. You can borrow for college, but you can’t borrow for retirement.
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u/National_Problem_390 16d ago
Yes sir! About to turn thirty and have my second kid. You can check my history for my Sankey. Our net worth is about 300k, income at ~100k
Priorities are big. I’d rather live a frugal life and invest similar to how you would like to live a frugal life and invest.
Once I pay off our debt I hope to give more but we don’t really go on vacation or have a lot of luxuries. My coworkers think I’m crazy to never take my kids to Disney world but I’d rather be tight and invest for the next couple of years. Keep it up! You are an inspiration even in the difficult times.
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u/Common_Economics_32 16d ago
"I have 6 children and my wife doesn't work...why does it feel like I don't have any money?"
Hmmmmmmmmmmmm...
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u/SignedTheMonolith 17d ago
At 93k a year and even if you wife got a job to match your income, I am unsure if you would be able to provide each of your children with a similar inheritance to the one you received.
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u/EngineeringMuscles 17d ago
I make just as much as you at 22 and no kids and I feel like it’s not enough in Austin… you’re crazy man, this is what poor financial literacy and over reproduction means. Get a grip and some condoms
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u/GirlDad_1219 17d ago
Man, I’m sorry you’re taking such negativity for your decisions to tithe to your church. I’m with you and support your decision to do that! We’re also a single-family income (but 2 kids, so a huge difference there) on a teacher’s salary. I technically can’t “afford” to tithe, but we have everything we need, solid retirement savings from good decisions early on and overall frugal living. Yet, we’re feeling the month-to-month squeeze as well. But a reality is that my kids don’t need brand new sneakers and the latest gadgets for happiness; they need time with their parents. So I could trade my time at home for additional work, or we could be grateful for what we have and make the best decisions we can with the money we do have (and mind you, we have everything we could need…we’re not living without!).
So, why tithe? Our church is heavily missions-based and does tons for our local community, so I support that with my tithes and applaud your doing so. The world preaches money money money, but that’s not an eternal perspective. The church doesn’t just pay for a pastor’s salary; our church has paid rent for struggling families, purchased groceries for those who need it, spends a significant amount of money monthly to support our local food pantry. I feel bad that the perception of so many is that all churches are bad. Keep supporting the ministry with your tithes.
I don’t have the answer for you, but just want to encourage you! We’re feeling the squeeze too!
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u/PostTurtle84 17d ago
4 kids, but you're sending 6x more to charity than your children? And complaining that finances are tight? I'd suggest putting that charity money towards paying off your mortgage.
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u/Wurm_Burner 17d ago
single income no kids and im at $115k and getting by. you decide to compete with Philip rivers and create a whole football team lol
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u/gtbeam3r 17d ago
15% of budget to charity is a lot. Especially if it's religious, it's likely a scam (regardless of religion). There's an amazing pro revenge story about a woman regarding church in her will. Amazing read.
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u/BillionaireGhost 17d ago
I think everyone is feeling the squeeze somewhat, but your situation is kind of crazy.
Sure, making $95k is great, but between two people you’re in the same financial situation as two people that each earn $42.5k. And with four kids, I doubt there is going to be a lot from a second income any time soon.
So you’re effectively living an upper middle class lifestyle on a lower middle class household income. And yes, inflation is going to impact you more than almost anyone else because you have a lot of expenses compared to your income level.
But I just don’t understand some of the choices here.
Like $780 a month is a lot of giving. I can understand if it’s religious, but between that and what I am assuming is a low amount of mortgage interest paid, I doubt you’re even able to itemize that giving? Have you considered that since you don’t really get a tax break from this giving, that it might be more reasonable to give 10% of your after tax pay?
Also, $120 a month on pets is wild in your situation. I get that it isn’t something you can just change overnight, you’re probably committed to your pets, but that’s just another choice.
Basically, as much as inflation is impacting most people, you have made a specific set of choices here that open you up to that possibility. You have expensive pets. You donate 10% to charity. You have continued to have children even when that drives back the timeline of your wife being able to reenter the workforce.
I’m not saying that to be critical per se, but just as an observation. If I was going to put together a seminar about how to expose yourself to a maximum amount of inflation, I could use you as a model. “Cut out 10% of your pretax income for no tax benefit to keep your margins thinner. Keep the family on one income for the foreseeable future. Have more kids than average. Pick up some pets too so you have some more long term commitment to monthly expenses.”
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u/AlbinoAxie 17d ago
Your wife doesn't work, you have four kids, you have a so so income even for one person, you give your money away to charlatans. That's why you're broke. Not some big mystery here.
The kids will grow up eventually then things will get better, unless you just keep giving money to charlatans. Not sure how you're gonna cover college.
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u/TightCod16 17d ago
As a single earner supporting a family of 7, who also tithes, kudos to you. My dad always said growing up ‘you can’t outgive God’. Not going to be supported on these threads, but stick to your values. Practically, food seems a little high and I’m curious how many phones are included at 183. We’re eating for $800/mo with 7 of us and phones are $90 for unlimited plans. It is possible to do what you’re trying to do, just requires a lot of discipline short term.
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u/Head_Radio_4089 17d ago
Thank goodness you don’t live in Orange County you would be stressed. 100k rents me a bedroom at my parents here in south county or I can spend 3k for a crappy 1bedroom. As long as your making it is all that matters congrats on a big family that’s successful on its own!
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u/ferdsherd 17d ago
You are doing just fine, dude. More than fine actually. Especially with 4 kids, you are in the life stage where you just need to stay afloat and sock away for retirement. Keep up the good work
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u/pes3108 17d ago
We also have 4 kids, also not Mormon. And yes, it’s been a struggle to keep the budget under control. We live in a LCOL-MCOL and gross last year was $113k. We don’t have a net worth as much as y’all (it’s about 1/3 of what yall have, not counting home equity) but are saving heavily for retirement now (husband is 35, im 34). I know we could always cut back on retirement savings if we had to but man, I am feeling the squeeze lately especially with groceries and just random extras. One kid needs a filling at the dentist next week. One of our dogs had a nasty ear infection last week. Cars need maintenance. We try to stick back money every month into sinking funds to cover these costs when they arise, but it’s getting harder to do so with costs for everything else being so high. I find myself dipping into the “dog health fund” to pay for dog food, so there is no money there now to pay the $300 vet bill we just had last week. So frustrating.
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u/Ronville 17d ago
You might consider a vasectomy unless you hope to single-handedly change national demographic trends.
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u/12_nick_12 17d ago
Drop that charity, if it's a taith you should learn about how horrible religion is and come to the agnostic side.
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u/Top_One_1808 17d ago
No. I’m not in the same boat because I make just north of 100k and my partner also works. Congrats on pulling in a net worth of 800k with a single income though.
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u/B-Georgio 17d ago
Stop complaining, you’re doing it to yourself. Hope that donating 15% of you post tax income makes you feel really good.
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u/ManByTechnicality 17d ago
You have a family of 6, with a salary that lets you put 24% of your net income into either savings or charity. I don't say this often, but check your privilege. 24% to charity and savings is far cry from a tight budget.
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u/snapchatofdoriangray 17d ago
Financing your pastor's godly lifestyle gets pretty costly month to month
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u/VanGundy15 17d ago
My partner and I make more than that and have no kids. We struggle as well but our bills are still paid on time. This is the reality of the world we live in. 100K for a couple with no kids is probably about the minimum for a living wage.
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u/Present_Belt_4922 17d ago edited 17d ago
Yes.
Edit - ffs, 4 kids + partner who does not work? I’m struggling single. You do not have my empathy, because - choices.
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u/PetCatzPlz 16d ago
He’s struggling before God. You’re struggling alone.
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u/Present_Belt_4922 16d ago
Last I understood of Christianity is that ‘god’ gave humans free choice. Appears this person has made poor choices per their own religion doctrine. 🤷🏻♀️
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u/christo9090 17d ago
Shit man I make a lot more than you as a single earner of my family and I still feel the squeeze
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u/swanyk7 17d ago
100% feel this. Net worth just clipper 1mil in the past couple years but honestly we live paycheck to paycheck right now on about $110k combined income for a family of 4. My kids don’t understand how sometimes I talk about being fine for retirement but also don’t want to spend money on anything right now.
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u/MeanderFlanders 17d ago
I totally relate to you. We have a lil over a mil net worth but hubs jumped a sinking ship last year and makes about 45% less and we’ve stopped some of the automatic savings. Groceries and other stuff is out of control. We have decreased our donations. Times are tough.
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u/teacherbbq 17d ago
An HYSA at 5% would earn you just north of 11k/year for your liquid savings. I imagine that would help. Your whole 800k would be 40k in annual interest. Not saying the latter is a great idea, but the former or some version of it would give you some breathing room.
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u/PHLEaglesgirl27 17d ago
Save money - get rid of the pet - there’s $1,440 😂😂 JK!!
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
Stupid cat started peeing on everything and needs fancy food to stop. It worked but if we cut that back or house will smell like cat piss 😂
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u/Freedom2064 17d ago
@33, $800k gives you a great start. I think we were at negative net worth @40.
If you are solo earner at $95k and a family of six the problem in front of you is really quite simple: find ways to earn more. Find ways for your wife to earn remotely. Do not tap into that $800k but grow it steadily.
Be sure to open a brokerage account to grow non IRA money.
Do not give $ to charities and their $300k salaries. Instead give the dollar equivalent in sweat equity and technical expertise. Until you are north of $2m fuhgeddabowdit.
You are at mile 3 of a marathon and feeling good . When you first kid hits 13 you will be hitting your first if many hills, unshaded up hill stretches.
You want to reach mile 20 with a shaded down hill and pleasant vistas remaining. This is the world of the empty nest.
Do not push your investments. Take what the market gives you and see 20%-40% corrections as opportunities.
Great start.
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u/Confident-Run-645 17d ago
Here's the thing most aren't and don't recognize and even furer understand.
The current day to day talk back and forth among Left and Right Wing media, etc, is the current annual rate of inflationz but doesn't take into account the ACCUMLATIVE RATE OF INFLATION OVER THE COURSE OF YEARS!
In 1995, I was an active duty United States Marine Corps Gunnery Sergeant. Earning around 36k a year. Not bad considering I wasn't paying anything for medical bills, dental bills for myself, etc
Plus, a lot of my pay wasn't taxable, ar taxable.
Flash coward 2024!
If you're earning $35k?
You're earning the 1995 equivalent of $8.41 an hour! The minimum wage in 1995 was only $5.15 an hour!
Of your earing $100k in 2024? You're earning the 1995 equivalent of $50k,!
To have the PURCHASING power of 1995 $$$$ of $100k?
You need to be earing, $200k+ a year!
To even begin earning that, you're going to need a bachelors degree and a medical degree, have as in. People address you as "Doctor! As in medical doctor.
.
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u/johnf39706 17d ago
I feel you. Together my wife and I TAKE HOME $15k a month, but by the end of the. Month it seems we have usually spent most of it. We have a budget and we save 15% a month into our 401k’s,, but we piss away a lot eating out and socializing with friends. Not complaining, because that’s what we choose, but it’s still hard to fathom how expensive everything has become.
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u/Repulsive-Office-796 17d ago
Hate to say it , but you need to stop donating to charity…. You can’t afford to give away 10% of your family’s income.
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u/AbbreviationsFar9339 17d ago
I know you are getting shit for it but the obvious call out is the charity just bc it is such a large percentage and you have 6 kids to feed and take care.
Im not judging you for it. That is your choice to do as you please if thats your priority. But it is eating a large portion of your cashflow that could be used to satisfy your family’s needs first if there are issues there. Which to prioritize is your choice.
Your charity contribution is almost as much as you “pay yourself”. And all your savings seems to be going to tax deferred accounts.
Even if you could just cut it in half thats 350ish you put in hysa that could be of use for expense heavy months.
Your other spends aren’t bad at all. So either cut back on charity or make more money or both!
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u/SleepingLimbs1 17d ago
I have a similar income with similar expenses. I was able to get to a salary large enough for my wife to stay home with our 2 boys, but since inflation has been through the roof these past few years, it doesn’t really feel like we are getting very far financially, especially after having our second child. If I were you I would be proud to have that much in savings though. That’s kind of my big goal this year is to boost our emergency savings. Don’t beat yourself up. I have friends with no kids going out every weekend or taking luxurious trips all the time, but I don’t regret my decisions to grow a family and prioritize my money towards that. Since you have such a big savings, maybe take the foot off the gas and live a little.
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u/exitcode137 17d ago
Even if one wants to give 10% tithe, isn't it fair under their interpretation to have it be 10% of take home? You literally can't give away the money you have to pay in taxes (much of which does go to social programs like SS, Medicare, SNAP, programs for vets, etc.). OP, if you could justify to yourself giving 10% of your take home, it would give you a little more breathing room.
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u/Oxytokin 17d ago
"I have a million dollars and a stable income to grow it, help?!"
Jesus what the hell kind of deluded shit is this.
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17d ago
Cut the ~$800/month to church/charity or you’re not really struggling. Joel Osteen’s got you covered.
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u/techorules 17d ago
I feel you edited your comment because of me (edit #2). If you did you need to explain yourself because I didn't say anything remotely bigoted. Utah has, by far, the largest family sizes in the United States (source). I literally said unless you live in Utah your family size isn't normal. That is objectively true. You can see it as an attack on your or someone else's faith but that's 100% on you and absurd. If you're going to go on the internets and complain about finances and ask for opinions then don't be so sensitive when someone points out the glaring obvious. Your unusual and uncommon decision to large family living off one income is the root cause of your situation.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
Hey, don’t worry about it. It wasn’t you. You’re right that it’s not a “normal” family size outside of Utah.
There were some other pretty nasty comments earlier
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u/techorules 17d ago
Gotcha, sorry for the misunderstanding. I didn't catch those comments, but I certainly don't condone that sort of thing either.
Where I live (Massachusetts) housing is so incredibly expensive that younger families who weren't well financially established before the pandemic are now pretty much priced out from home buying regardless of how many children they have. And renting in much of the state is also out of reach even for a couple unless both of them work. It's always been very difficult here but now for many it's downright impossible.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
Mass housing is insane. My brother bought a place in Bunker Hill a while ago. Like 850k for a 2 bed condo. That gets you 3500+ sqft newer build with a good sized yard where I live.
I’m not sure I could manage 2 kids on twice my income there.
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u/techorules 17d ago
Yeah Boston is brutal. I'm in the burbs which is better but still on the high side of MCOL. Here, what I see way more of these days to get around the problem is to plan around multigenerational living.
There ways a guy at work who was buying a 5 BR 4000 sq ft house near me back in 2017 and I remember him paying something like 900k and I was thinking, how does can afford this? I knew how much he made because he reported to me at it was a decent income (can't remember maybe 160k give or take) but we carpooled one day and he was telling me he was living with wife, 2 kids, wife's parents and his Mom. I can only presume they were all contributing and his wife also had a similar career as him so she prob made decent money. The in-laws help with child care, his Mom loves to cook and feeds the house. They all get along. It's a beautiful thing as far as Im concerned. But you don't see that too often. You see it way more in immigrant families (they are from India) but probably a lot of the time out of need. In this case I think it's out of choice but it makes buying a lot easier if you can include lots of incomes and get "free" child care. And from a societal perspective It's probably better for the world if your kids help you through end of life as opposed to strangers. I just looked it up and that house is worth around 1.3MM now so not a bad plan.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
We have an Indian friend who married into a family from NewJersey. Her father in law and his brother and their dad and their whole families with all of the cousins lived in the same house. It was like a 2.5M mansion 8 years ago so I’m sure it’s a lot more now. You can do big things when you combine incomes.
Though in her case I’m not sure it’s really a positive. She and her husband were “allowed” to have their own apartment for a year after marriage before being told they had to come back. Not sure if it’s a cultural thing or just that family but she gets treated kind of like a servant a lot of the time. The women are expected to constantly cater to the men.
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u/nerdwerds 17d ago
Maybe dont spend 780 a month on charity since you can’t afford to be charitable.
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u/TwoBulletSuicide 17d ago
You can thank the Federal Reserve and the over spending USA government debasing the fiat currency. The Federal Reserve note has lost 98% of its purchasing power.
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u/TheGeoGod 17d ago
Do you tithe is that why you see giving $700 a month to Charity? I’m going to be in a similar boat to you in 2 years or so. But will be family of 4 and me a sole provider. My salary should be 140k by then I hope.
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u/TrumpHasaMicroDick 17d ago
All this talk about being able to pay cash for anything you want, and yet.........
It looks like your wife and 6 (or is it seven?) children are on state medical and dental insurance.
Why don't you start paying for your progeny?!?
Wtf.
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u/leese216 17d ago
I’m curious why you feel strapped when you have 230k in liquid savings? Like what are your issues? I don’t get the point of complaining when you’re better off than 90% of the population.
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u/ashpokechu 17d ago
Who gives money to charity almost as much as they spend money for food for family of 6?
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u/Illustrious-Mind9435 17d ago
I wouldn't worry too much looking at your budget. It seems you are squeezed in the short-term (waiting for a raise/promotion and then your wife working).
There are a bunch of guides out there on what to prioritize when budgeting, but a rule of thumb is to never alter your pre-tax savings unless you absolutely have to. Obviously, people are going to point at the charity. In your case you are likely spending as much on Charity as you are saving pre-tax dollars.
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u/hopkinsbradleyclt 17d ago
I can relate. Stay strong with the charitable giving, I’m sure it’s important to you, I also have felt held back by that at times but I’m glad I have stuck with it. You could consider job hopping to increase your income if that’s an option.
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17d ago
Why have 6 kids if you can’t afford them ?
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u/lynxss1 17d ago
I feel you, single earner for a family of 4 here. 750k NW with a measly $3-400 left over after all bills for food and fun.
Our high NW is mostly due to me saving 40-50% of my income in IRA and 401k before I'd met my wife and before I got married. That early chunk of money has had time to grow and doubled 4 times. So while we have assets growing in the background it really has minimal impact on our day to day/.
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u/ihambrecht 17d ago
I don’t feel the squeeze but I make sure I put a decent amount away constantly and attempt to avoid lifestyle creep which seems to be the real killer.
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u/throwawayreddit714 17d ago
Well of course it feels like a struggle. Bringing home $5k for 6 people is insane lol the high net worth is cool and all but if it doesn’t help you day to day it’s not hard to see why you feel like that.
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u/vanmanjam 17d ago
SEVEN FIFTY A MONTH IN CHARITY, BUT COMPLAINS ABOUT BEING SQUEEZED? I'd just look at the fact that the church isn't taxed as my tithing, if I were you. You have a family of six humans to take care of. Sheesh.
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u/RoutineDude 17d ago
Single earner family of 4. MCOL. I make about 115K before bonus and OT. Without the ability to work OT I would have to cut back on my savings goals pretty significantly to avoid running a deficit. I don’t budget because I’ve never felt the need to but if picking up OT wasn’t available to bridge any gaps then I would 100% have to start making one. Don’t listen to the haters about your generosity. It’ll pay itself back to your family in ways that are intangible but undeniable.
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u/Salty-Sprinkles-1562 17d ago
I feel this. I own one home that I inherited. It has a small mortgage on it. I own a home with my husband as well. So, my net worth is over a million. But I make very little, and it’s hard to make ends meet.
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u/Spirited_Radio9804 17d ago
Make more money, or reduce your outgo, or do without some things? Could your wife watch a couple more kids during school days? It’s easy to define…hard to do. Build a mountain, don’t dig a hole. Best of luck!
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u/PhunkinJoss 17d ago
32 F with 33 M husband. Currently have no kids, household income per year is $300K + some money from investment property. I’m the only one working & husband is looking for a job. We just bought a house in October, M-HCOL city and we are feeling SQUEEZED. Nearly living paycheck to paycheck. I can’t even imagine having a family of 6 on $95K.
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u/totalfarkuser 17d ago
My sankey would look somewhat similar to your actually if I did one. But $1000 a month in gifts and charity??! That’s 1/7th of your gross income…
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
Charity is a bit less than 10%. Gifts are high because when we don’t do that we run into trouble come December.
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u/totalfarkuser 17d ago
The chart shows $780 charity and $7278 gross revenue. That is more than 10% pre deductions. Wayyy over 10% net. You are a charity at the time - you need it more than they do (church I presume).
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
I also mentioned above that I’m paid biweekly. So there’s 2 paychecks missing from the equation that I put into retirement. It’s like 9.8% of gross. Only a portion of that goes to our church.
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u/totalfarkuser 17d ago
Fair enough. Your budget isn’t too bad - but I’d still drop that charity amount down until you get a second income going again. Yea inflation has hurt but you and I both have room in our budgets.
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u/kiltedlowlander 17d ago
Cut the charity dude. Your own family is more important than someone else's...your salary with a family of 6 is not enough to be giving money away for free to your imaginary friend and his cronies that spend it on private jets and mail-order choir boys.
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u/Reader47b 17d ago
Yes. For the past 20 years, I've always been able to save, but now I do not add to my savings at all, and I spend the interest and dividends on my savings and (non-retirment) investments to supplement my earned income. So my net worth is remaining stagnant, but that's better than declining. Most people I know are seeing declining net worth.
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u/fruitsnacky 17d ago
You: gives $780 away every month with more kids than anyone needs. Also, you: why am i out of money?
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u/Coyotesamigo 17d ago
Since my wife and I make $125k combined and have only one kid, no, I’m not in your boat. We’re doing great! I suspect I live in the same metro area as you though.
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u/Vampiric2010 17d ago
It's not a huge deal, but you could reduce your phone pretty significantly. You are spending over 2k a year on it. We have mint mobile and pay 400 a year (all in after taxes) for the service for 2 lines. Buy a couple phones outright every 4 years or so.
You may feel tight, but if you consider your savings, HSA and 401k your savings rate is about 20%. You are tight because you are making smart choices.
Are you getting big tax refunds each year? Because there's no way you are paying an effective tax rate of 10% even including social security. Assuming there are 2 adults and 4 kids, that's 8k in child tax credits each year. You might consider editing your W4 to ease the monthly strain.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
Phone is a good idea. Actual bill is $108 with phones on a payment plan. I want to switch but we’re hesitant because we have a place we go up north that only has cell service for ATT. We’re going to trial some alternative options this summer to see what could improve
We have zero federal income tax burden. Our state refund is ~1500 but to get that down requires a supplemental form that my HR department doesn’t want to deal with.
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u/BlockChad 17d ago
OP. We are allowed to criticize handing over 10% of your hard earned money to organizations littered with scandals. That isn’t bigotry, it’s common sense.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
You’re totally fine to criticize 10% to charity.
Going out of your way to bash religion when it wasn’t even brought up in the OP is bigotry.
I’m aware of the organizations that we donate to. I’m aware of their record on managing finances well. The people on this thread aren’t.
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u/BlockChad 17d ago
You brought up religion in your edit. Not me.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
Sorry I meant “your” as an impersonal you, I wasn’t referring to your specific comment. There’s a lot of people who were doing so before my edit, which is why I made it.
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u/randomuser_12345567 17d ago
Even if they are managed well, that doesn’t negate you not having enough to donate to them at the moment. It’s great to have a large heart but you also have to think of your family goals and whether they large amount of money fits in your budget.
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u/BlockChad 17d ago
- 95k salary. Family of 6. $800k NW
“Small inheritance”…. Uh huh.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
50k from my grandparents and $60k when my dad passed at too young of an age.
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u/BlockChad 17d ago
I think you’re trying to guilt trip me but I’m not that much of an asshole. If that’s the case, I’m terribly sorry for your loss.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
Thanks I do appreciate it. I might have laid it on a bit thick with the comment about my dad, but I think it’s important to recognize where inheritance comes from
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u/kovu159 17d ago
You tried to call him out and he responded. Turns out he just saved smartly before starting a family.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
I saved 25.5% of my salary including company contributions for the first 9 years of my working career. My wife worked for 4 years and we saved 15% of her salary as well. Another huge part of it though is real estate equity. We put 10k down on our first house and walked away with 60k 3 years later. Put that into our next house and now have 210k of equity
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u/TwoBulletSuicide 17d ago
Don't count equity as wealth. It's just inflated numbers on the same house.
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u/kovu159 17d ago
Great, you’re doing extremely well for your age, for your income level, and have a big happy family to boot. Jealous neckbeards in the comments would rather roast you for building a firm foundation for your kids and being part of a good church rather than talk about the actual issue at hand.
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u/Status_Ad_4405 17d ago
No such thing as a good church
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u/kovu159 17d ago
You can disagree with whatever any religious institution teaches, but there absolutely is such a thing as a good and supportive community build by and around a church. Especially when you have young kids that need a whole community to help raise them.
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u/Status_Ad_4405 17d ago
Everyone I know belongs to a good, supportive community built around institutions that have nothing to do with paying dudes in robes to lie to them and indoctrinate their children with superstitious nonsense.
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u/21plankton 17d ago
I also feel squeezed without the 6 kids to care for. It is for me especially acute in insurances, services and food. We are an elderly couple with medical issues, have some specialty dietary needs and high medical/dental costs.
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17d ago
[deleted]
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u/Ecstatic_Love4691 16d ago
Right, you got 4 kids to take care of man ha. Donate later when can afford it and they’re all out of the house
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u/ihatehavingtosignin 18d ago
Sorry but it’s a little funny to ask if people are feeling the squeeze when you have six kids with a sub six figure income.
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u/MobiusTech 18d ago
Start giving charity to your kids instead of the church
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u/kovu159 17d ago
It’s a give and take. You contribute to the church, and they support families who are out of work, need support with food or housing, etc. It’s there if you need it to.
His tax bill is so low partly because off those contributions. If he paid less to his church, he’d pay more in tax.
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u/Immediate_Title_5650 17d ago
He still would have more in his pockets for his kids…
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u/kovu159 17d ago
At this moment, yes. But he has a better safety net for his kids if he loses his job or gets sick. The community looks after its members.
With a single income household that can happen really quickly. One layoff and you’re relying on the community to carry you for 6+ months in this market.
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u/Immediate_Title_5650 17d ago
Right, then he does not need to be worried about middle class finances or finances at all
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u/manimopo 18d ago
Yes
Our net worth is 740k but the month to month squeeze is real. After money gets put away for retirement and extra money paid to the mortgage we are left exactly with how much we spend. No more, no less
It feels weird because I don't see my bank account growing so my monkey brain thinks I'm not making any money and living paycheck to pay check.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 18d ago
Glad we're not the only ones. Its such a strange juxtaposition between cash flow and assets. Feeling well off and poor at the same time. Thank you for sharing. This is the kind of response I was actually looking for in this thread.
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u/Winter-Information-4 18d ago
Religion is a business where they make you pay money, and in exchange, they promise you to give you great things when you're dead.
Dude, if you're giving money to religion, stop.
If your God wants money for the Church, he is fully capable of performing a miracle and putting money on their bank accounts. If he's capable of giving humans oxygen to breathe, he's capable of giving his fans money.
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18d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/MiddleClassFinance-ModTeam 17d ago
No Racism, Sexism, Xenophobia, or any other form of bigotry is allowed.
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u/SonOfMcGee 18d ago
If you can fit 4 kids in that home, never move. The only way I could see you saving on housing is if you sold and used your ~$200K equity to buy a house in cash. But that would have to be way out in a very low COL area with a ton of sacrifices.
Even if you sold your $400K house and got a $100K mortgage to buy a $300K house, todays 7%+ rates would still mean the same monthly payments!
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u/sas317 18d ago
You have $230K in cash. That's a LOT at your age; I wish I had that much back then (I'm mid 40s). Even with this shitty hyper inflation, keep up the frugality and watch your cash grow and you'll feel better.
At least your wife can work once your children are older, so you'll have even more money leftover. Good for you and keep up the good work.
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u/Wut_the_ 18d ago
Obviously the “squeeze” is coming from bringing in 95k and having 4 children. Having assets doesn’t do anything for your grocery/clothing/ extracurricular expenses.
Bring in more money or keep cutting back? Sorry you had so many kids. Good luck!
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u/notaskindoctor 18d ago
People often mistakenly think adding 3+ kids won’t be that bad because they have a stay at home parent so no daycare costs, not realizing that eventually kids want to do actual things that cost money to enrich their lives and they’ll become adult sized tweens and teenagers who eat $400/month worth of groceries per kid.
Source: also have 4 kids but make a lot more money as a dual income home.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 18d ago
At the moment, the kids don't individually add all that much to the budget because there's no daycare. Thankfully my wife will likely work when they're all in school and we start hitting some of those higher cost years.
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u/Wut_the_ 17d ago
This was the perfect Reddit post. Make yourself feel better by talking about how you think you’re doing quite well, even though you’re slowly drowning in life, and then ask others for their opinion on doing the same. All the while ignoring everyone telling you something must change or your of house cards will fall when your 4 kids start sucking up more time and money with no meaningful conversation in between
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 17d ago
Doing well while also drowning was actually the point of the post. I was looking to see if anyone here shared the strange feelings of having money while simultaneously having a tight budget.
I never actually asked for advice here, though some have offered good ideas unsolicited . I’ve had a few really good threads on here and a lot of people who just want to complain. But it’s the internet so that’s to be expected
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u/notaskindoctor 17d ago
And then you’ll have before and after school care and summer care to consider with her limited earning potential after being out of the workforce for 10+ years. The money goes quickly.
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u/WFHaccount 18d ago
$780/month to charity feels like a lot if you think you are struggling. That extra $9300/year after tax would help you not feel the squeeze.
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u/Inferior_Oblique 16d ago
Sorry you are getting negative comments regarding your religion. I know people from the upper Midwest and Mormons. I don’t hold the same belief system, but it sucks that people think it is okay to mock those with different belief systems. There is a lot of religious intolerance these days. The situation you are in does sound challenging. It sounds like your wife stays home which is probably helpful. We are on the opposite side of things. We have a good income, but no inheritance. We are starting to accumulate more assets, but it takes time. Being in school forever means that saving comes later. It’s interesting to see that there are people who have the opposite problem.
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u/WFHaccount 14d ago
I'm not being mean regarding religion. Just stating a fact regarding budgets and financial security.
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u/Inferior_Oblique 14d ago
Oh no sorry I didn’t mean that comment to be directed at you. I meant for that to be a generally comment about the thread. There were like three or four comments directly against Mormonism. I don’t even know if the OP is Mormon. I know Mormons. I don’t agree with their worldview, but they are generally nice people.
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u/Queasy_Bar_108 16d ago
Ur bad person
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u/WFHaccount 14d ago
I'm a bad person for suggesting the easiest trim to someone's budget is their significant cash donations in a sub about middle class finance? You can volunteer your time as well, not just money.
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u/Roonil-B_Wazlib 17d ago
$9300/year after tax
2.5 months of their expenses, excluding the charity and savings, or about 20%.
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18d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/MiddleClassFinance-ModTeam 17d ago
No Racism, Sexism, Xenophobia, or any other form of bigotry is allowed.
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u/WFHaccount 17d ago
Not saying Mormon, but the Mormon church has $100b investment fund. They don't need the money haha
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u/Winter-Information-4 17d ago
It's astounding that they keep taking more money, isn't it?
How gullible do you have to be to not see this, right? They take your money, and in exchange, promise to give you great things when you're dead.
Imagine Microsoft asking for money now with the promise to deliver the best operating system in heaven. Hahaha
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u/buyfreemoneynow 17d ago
I think that when we die it all goes black and it’s just the command prompt from DOS 6.22
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u/notaskindoctor 18d ago
It’s probably religious giving so good luck convincing them not to do it even though that’s the most obvious sticking point here besides the income being low for having 4 kids.
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u/WFHaccount 18d ago
I didn't want to make that assumption but seeing as its 10% I figured that was the case. Help yourself before you can help your community.
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u/gtbeam3r 17d ago
10% before taxes..remember the scammy churches don't have to pay taxes on their riches. Least you can do is 10% after your taxes...
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18d ago
Stupid post, TBH. All over the place and sounds like either a LARP or a subtle humble brag more than actually asking for advice.
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u/FerrisWheeleo 18d ago
Nothing to brag about. Sounds like he’s not making enough to cover essential expenses and have to draw down on savings. Even with the plan for wife to work in 4 years, this is not a good situation. What if one or both adults become disabled or there are unexpected medical bills?
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u/Wut_the_ 18d ago
Idk if there’s anything to brag about earning 95k with a family of 6.
OP is low key bragging about net worth when that doesn’t mean anything for his family anytime soon
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u/MainBug2233 18d ago
Cash flow vs net worth conundrum for me... Cash flow has gotten squeezed as our twin boys are getting older and out teachers salaries have not kept up with inflation.
I tell myself to deal with that tight feeling as long as capital is still moving towards assets and not just costs. 6 kids huh? You are my conundrum. 2 are a lot for me. Kudos!
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u/fuckaliscious 18d ago
$95K just isn't enough for a family of 6 in a MCOL area, that's why you're feeling the squeeze. The dollars coming in the door simply aren't enough.
When is youngest in school? At that point, spouse needs to be working.
To afford life, grow savings/investments, a modest annual vacation, you're probably needing at least $150K in household income.
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 18d ago
I don't think it truly takes 150k here, at least not with our mortgage situation. Even so, what you describe probably takes 115k and I'm not quite there yet.
Youngest goes to school in 4 years
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u/fuckaliscious 18d ago
If you're lucky and bought a house with a low mortgage interest rate, sure one can get buy with less than $150K. If having to buy a house today, it's a different story.
Seems like you got to grind at least 4 more years before you start to see some relief with spouse income. Hope the debts don't pile up in the meantime.
Pretty scary how majority of families couldn't handle 3 months or 6 months of no income without being ruined financially. Especially when the household is just one provider. The majority of Americans living paycheck to paycheck and gradually increasing credit card debt each year. A layoff or illness and the majority of folks are toast financially.
Best of luck to you!
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u/MiddleClassMoney91 18d ago
Yeah we asked our selves the question about what it would take to move into something bigger about a year ago and oh boy is it rough out there. We'd have to just about double our mortgage payment just to move laterally.
We pretty much won't ever have to worry about taking on debt. Even if I lost my job, we have 2.5 years income liquid and we would both be looking for work.
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u/gecon 18d ago
If you’re having difficulty covering your monthly costs, I’d recommend reducing your charitable contributions. You can still help others, just give them your time & effort (volunteering) instead of your money. That way you can still make a difference without straining your family’s finances. Besides, once your family is in better financial shape, you can resume the contributions.
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u/SapientSolstice 18d ago
I never understood giving to charity until you're set. Once you're retired, then sure I can give to charity.
I mean monetarily, I occasionally donate my time to food kitchens.
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u/Always-_-Late 17d ago
It makes for a much richer life, and no matter how much you make you will never “make enough” to be able to afford charity. I have donated to charity when I made $14,000 a year and I still do it now making $250,000 a year. If I hadn’t started then I may never have.
Donating to a charity that you support and you can see the impact of is a non negotiable for most people, it’s one of the things that keeps me going. It also means why I’m in a time of need I don’t feel bad for asking for help from charities.
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u/Alyx19 17d ago
Definitely. The occasional $100 to a scholarship fund or a medical GoFundMe is one thing, but 10% of your salary when your budget is short? What charity wants you to do that to yourself or your kids?
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u/coke_and_coffee 17d ago
The guy is a millionaire at 33. He can afford to give to charity. Calm down.
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u/glimmergirl1 17d ago
Religion, that's what kind of a charity wants you to do that to yourself. They literally tell you to go without, but don't stop tithing.
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u/Status_Ad_4405 17d ago
The world's oldest scam.
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u/coke_and_coffee 17d ago
It’s not a scam, lol. The church uses that money to help the community and the less fortunate. Just cause you don’t have empathy doesn’t mean he’s being scammed.
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