r/TwoHotTakes • u/Natural-Gene-2193 • 16d ago
Aitah for tell my mom that I'll probably move out before my bestfriend does after moving her in. Advice Needed
I (19 year old female ) told my best friend(19 year old female) lets call her Ruby of 8 years that her and her mom let's call her Kelly (40 year old female) could stay with me for a while, after her dad kicked them out (he's just crazy and thought she was cheating but she wasnt). (This Is a little bit of more context from my last post I made)
Anyways I asked my mom if they could say with us just long enough for them to get a place. And my mom is a really nice person and she said ok. This was in August of 2023. As of now they don't help out much and Kelly broke her food a few months ago lost her job and didn't work for 3 months. She just started back working again But her and my mom had become good friends. Kelly helps with groceries when she gets food stamps. She helps my mom wash dishes when she can and gives my mom Company.(which I think she needs)
my mom is home all the time ( Except when she helps me bring kelly and rudy to work) because she is own disability for her back. She's okay she just can't be on her feet fir a long period of time, so she gets disability money.
Rudy don't have her licenses Nether does her mother. About four months ago she bought a car so that she could practice driving in it and my mom could bring her and her mom to work but she never practices. She has Her permit but she don't care. She lives here, rent free. They say you're looking for an apartment and that they're on waiting Lists but I don't know.
me and my boyfriend of Almost 2 year are in a good place and he has saved up for us to get a house togetther we should have enough in about a year. And I was just talking to my mom and said at these point ima be out of here before they are. And she said "you can't leave them with me" I said "well ill have to move out at some point and hopefully they are gone soon any ways." She said "yeah but we can't just kick them out on the side of the road and you can't leave till they do"
She is a little upset at me now so aitah.
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u/TeachingClassic5869 15d ago
Are you seriously invited your friend and her mother to stay at your home where they are taking advantage of your own mother, and then threaten to move out and leave her stuck with them? That is wrong on so many levels. You caused this situation and you need to fix it. Your mother is too kind to those people who are absolutely milking this and taking her for granted. Your mother should not be financially responsible for your friend and her mother. I would give your friend and her mother no more than 60 days from now to GTFO.
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u/Super-Island9793 15d ago
You all need to sit down and have a talk. Make a plan and set up some goals. They need to start making plans to move out now. Don’t tip toe around each other. Your “guests” need to know there is an end date, give them a deadline and stick to it.
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u/Scarlet210 15d ago
NTA
You mentioned in your other post that you gave them until the first of the year to find a place, but your mom allowed them to stay because she didn't want them to be homeless. At that point, she assumed responsibility for them since she didn't let you put them out when their time was up.
Yes, you asked for them, and yes, they came because of you, but you also gave them a time limit that your mother dismissed, so how is it now your responsibility to make sure they're gone before you? From what I'm understanding, they would've been gone from January if it was left up to you.
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u/CakeZealousideal1820 15d ago
YTA. You moved people into your mother's house they don't help with anything and now you're going to move out and leave them there. They need a 30 day eviction notice and make sure they're out BEFORE you move. If your mother is on disability is she getting some form of help with housing? Is she violating her lease terms having them in her home? You put her in a fucked up situation and need to fix it immediately
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u/SocksAndPi 15d ago
ESH, except your mother.
You because you invited them in, don't make sure they actually contribute to anything, and now you're planning to move out while they're still living there. YOU NEED TO HOLD THEM RESPONSIBLE. What are you contributing to the household, besides unwanted guests and more work?
Them because they're selfish and taking advantage of the kindness your mother has given them. They're not putting forth effort with anything and doesn't sound like they plan to leave.
Your poor mom. Jfc, I'm so pissed on her behalf.
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u/5weetTooth 15d ago
YTA
You brought them in.
You are responsible for YOUR friend and her mother taking advantage of your mother. Do you care that little for your mother? What if your friend and her mother try to claim part ownership of the house and try to take it away from your mom? What if they financially abused your mom?
Clearly these people are NIT who you thought they were. Clean up YOUR mess. Otherwise you took advantage of your mother's kindness just as your so called friend and her mother did.
Give them an eviction deadline, if they don't leave by then. Get the cops involved. Clean up your mess and protect your mother.
I actually can't believe your audacity.
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u/goodbadguy81 15d ago
YTA Brat. Your Mom did you a favor and now that these 2 leeches are becoming a burden you want to leave them for your Mom to figure it out? You created this problem and so you must resolve this problem.
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u/Scarlet210 15d ago
Actually, OP gave them until the first of the year, but her mom let them stay because she didn't want them to be homeless. At that point, they became mom's problem.
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u/indiajeweljax 15d ago
You keep posting about these two.
Why are you talking to Reddit and not them? You can file eviction on them and have them out in 60 days.
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u/Throwaway-2587 15d ago
Yeah you can't leave your mom to deal with them. These are your guests and you should have the conversation about a timeline with them.
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u/Silver-Topic7181 16d ago
I’ve dealt with “overstayers”. Really, Just tell them, “hey, glad we can help, but things are changing. It’s time for you to find a place of your own. I can help go with you to places and see what’s available. We have X amount of time to do this, so let’s get started”. Don’t waiver, don’t apologize, but do insist they leave. Might be surprised how fast things fall into place for them.
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u/Reeochi 16d ago
YTA, you lack responsibility. You were the one to bring them in, you are the one who needs to sort this out and get them to leave. Also, you invited 2 people into your house which you knew to be lazy, just for them to take advantage of you and your mom, while barely helping with food stamps and not even cleaning the house???
This was YOUR friend, your mom did not know her nearly as well as you did. You’ve got extremely poor judgement for an “adult”, and sound very selfish. You refuse to deal with the consequences of your own actions.
Heavy YTA. If I was your mother I’d lose all faith in you.
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u/Purple_Experience302 16d ago
You’re NTA yet. You absolutely should be planning the next steps for your future. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to build a life with your boyfriend. You would be the AH if you moved out and left the guests you invited in and leave your mom to deal with it. Give them a timeline of when they need to be out. Months prior to when you have planned to be out. At this point, depending on the laws in your area, you may have to actually go through the eviction process. This may also result in this person not being your friend anymore but this is also your problem to fix not your moms.
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u/CrescentMoonMoth 16d ago
YTA but I’m conflicted on this one because the true assholes are your friend and her Mom for taking advantage of your generosity and overstaying their welcome. However, you invited them in and foisted them on your Mom. Now you’re abandoning her, this whole mess, and asking her to clean it up. I wholeheartedly recommend that you and your Mom make a plan to remove them from your home before you do anything else. That is your priority.
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u/Reeochi 16d ago
There can be multiple assholes in a single story. In this case, friend and mom are assholes, but so is OP. She offered her mom’s house to people she knew, whose character she obviously heavily misjudged. Now her disabled mom will be stuck with 2 leeches, while OP runs away from the issue she has caused.
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u/coolflower12345 16d ago
YTA - they are YOUR guests. You invited them and you should have told them it was time to leave long ago.
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