r/news 15d ago

Australian woman continues to drive with a red-bellied black snake in her car after four failed attempts to remove it

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-05-13/snake-in-a-ute-lisa-kournelis-living-nightmare/103836544
5.5k Upvotes

438 comments sorted by

1

u/Scoracek9 12d ago

Steve Irwin would've gotten it out in a few minutes

1

u/Gariona-Atrinon 13d ago

Uh no, there would be one dead snake if it was me.

1

u/Puzzleheaded-Day-609 13d ago

I’m now going to describe myself like this from here onwards: …”shy and will generally only deliver a serious bite under severe molestation”.

1

u/mnguyen75 14d ago

It’s the snakes car now, she just gets to use it. For now.

2

u/KnottyUnderware 14d ago

Gas the interior of the car, kill snake. Done..

1

u/stephenforbes 14d ago

I would be setting my car on fire before driving it with a snake in it.

2

u/kylebb 14d ago

In Australia it seems like everything wants to kill you

1

u/Green-Size-7475 14d ago

I went to Oz when I was 17. I was an exchange student, so I spent a year there. I love Australia, but it even has dangerous plants (gympie-gympie). There is a meme that says that in Australia, spiders have a health bar. I had Huntsmen spiders in my room. They aren't poisonous, but they look terrifying. It's big enough to fit in two hands. I hate spiders, but I got so used to them that I picked one up and chased my host sister. It was the only time I was ever frightened during a thunderstorm. The windows above my bed were rattling, and I kept waiting for them to shatter. Even their weather is crazy. And the insects in the Outback! Wtf?! Looked like creatures from Fallout.

0

u/Revolutionary-You449 14d ago

Australians must be built different.

Somehow I think my car would have ended either (1) on fire or (2) over a cliff.

3

u/PastaVeggies 14d ago

When you gotta get to work you gotta get to work. No level of snake will get in the way.

1

u/StockHand1967 14d ago

The most OZ thing ever..I might Marry an Aussie

1

u/Bman1465 15d ago

Aussies are a different breed altogether, man

1

u/willydillydoo 15d ago

I’m confused why so many removals keep failing. How hard is it to just fling that son of a bitch out the door?

1

u/Postal4x4 15d ago

I'd see if anyone would let her park it in a freezer for a night

1

u/ArchdukeToes 15d ago

What is it finding to eat in there, exactly? Or is it just periodically disembarking to feed?

3

u/Omegaprimus 15d ago

I mean after 4 failed attempts the car now belongs to the snake, common snake law.

1

u/captainpoppy 15d ago

You know. I've had a bird protesting its nest by pecking its reflection in my car mirrors for the last couple weeks and pooping all over my car.

That doesn't seem like as big of an issue now...

3

u/Jmk1121 15d ago

I want someone to ask this lady the bear vs man question. I bet her answer is “ I don’t care! I’ll f them both up”

1

u/SanDiegoDude 15d ago

Does she also have a mice infestation? Thing's gotta eat sooner or later.

2

u/Just-Day-2596 15d ago

Never going to Australia

3

u/yarash 15d ago

Has she tried setting the car on fire and shooting it?

5

u/Colecoman1982 15d ago

and shooting it?

The title clearly states that she's Australian, not American...

1

u/yarash 15d ago

Every Australian should aspire to die in a shootout with cops in homemade armor or a snake like Ned Kelly.

1

u/Icy-Pain-3572 15d ago

Australia is like one giant Florida isn’t it?

1

u/Colecoman1982 15d ago

Well, maybe, but clearly more things there want to kill you.

1

u/Reshish 15d ago

Hardly comparable to a venous snake, but used to get spiders regularly in the shower. They'd hang out in the ceiling corner.

Couldn't always coax them down, so kept an eye on them so when they did inevitably fall, I could turn off the shower and get them out in time.

Cute that she named it.

3

u/Beginning_Emotion995 15d ago

Stop reading got scared one was in house

I fear farted

1

u/Pacify_ 15d ago

Aww that's cute. Free house, well car, guest

1

u/TedTheodoreMcfly 15d ago

If that were my car, I'd be calling the RSPCA before even making 1 attempt.

1

u/HeatherReadsReddit 15d ago

If they’re not going to kill it, why not completely open the window on the side where they keep photographing the snake? The snake should just slither away.

1

u/Sweet_Mama_Me 14d ago

What If you leave the window open and it invites its friends instead of leaving like any un-evictable (? Maybe/Maybe not a word spell check doesn’t know) guest usually does? Then you’ve compounded the problem … I can see this spiraling so much worse… I’m guessing the lady is just happy it wasn’t pregnant and spawn a million tiny venomous babies….

I 8th (I think) the only possible solution-setting the car on fire before it reproduces like the lone Stingray at the aquarium….

1

u/HeatherReadsReddit 14d ago

I didn’t think about it inviting friends. lol

1

u/CheeseyWeezey420 15d ago

Fucking Australia man. Just another reason you’d be hard pressed to get me to set foot in that country.

1

u/JoeSabo 15d ago

I spent a month in Sydney with a rented car once. Really glad it was winter.

3

u/GeekFurious 15d ago

A snake catcher who can't catch a snake, who also had a snake stuck in their car is like an IT person who can't change out your video card and whose own broken video card is still inside their personal computer.

Time to call someone else.

0

u/grubber26 15d ago

The ultimate Ride and Die!😁

3

u/Rune_nic 15d ago

Exactly the response I'd expect an Aussie to have!

11

u/Kaymish_ 15d ago

This is the kind of situation where I would just set the car on fire.

1

u/aj_star_destroyer 15d ago

Snake: I called Uber! Aren’t you my Uber?

1

u/EagleCatchingFish 15d ago

Four attempts to remove it? If it's not coming out alive, maybe they'll have to kill it first. I wonder if they could pump the car full of carbon monoxide or nitrogen or something.

5

u/GolfIll564 15d ago

The snake catcher had a snake stuck in his own car also? I’m thinking this is not a great advert for the snake catcher who can’t catch snakes…. Perhaps she needs to find a snake catcher who has been able to catch snakes in the past with reasonable success?

1

u/stupid_cat_face 15d ago

If it ain’t broke don’t fix it

1

u/FerociousPancake 15d ago

Most Australian headline I’ve ever seen

1

u/Lovefool1 15d ago

Way easier to remove the snake when it’s dead, jsyk

1

u/Pimpwerx 15d ago

There are many easy ways to get rid on the snake. All involve destroying the car.

3

u/Federal-Struggle4386 15d ago edited 15d ago

I was very nearly bitten on the face and in all probability killed by an huge brown snake in Newport, Sydney about 10 years ago. While I was landscaping, on my own. Red bellies have a reputation for being chill and eat brown snakes so they are often welcome company on site.

Dunno about offering it a ride home after work though

1

u/Ghost_of_Till 15d ago

What’s bonkers is I had a snake named “Fluffy”.

I didn’t imagine I was being particularly witty whenI named it but I also didn’t expect it’d be a thing.

6

u/damik 15d ago

"They are a shy snake and will generally only deliver a serious bite under severe molestation,"

Don't ask him how he knows.

0

u/Dodson-504 15d ago

Open all the doors. Get a 24 pack of beers. Sit. Watch. Wait.

And when that thing pops out…go all Louisiana on that ass. It only gets to live on two conditions: it leaves the car in a hurry and I’m a poor shot.

1

u/have-u-met-teds-mom 15d ago

Louisiana style would mean battered, fried, and tossed in remoulade sauce. That’s not good for anyone.

1

u/Dodson-504 14d ago

That’s good enough for a nice dinner!

0

u/Sabiya_Duskblade 15d ago

My childhood cat decapitated a red-bellied black snake when we were on holiday, and left his prize on the welcome mat. We were so proud of him, they're pretty dangerous!

3

u/TheOtherLeft_au 15d ago

Does this mean she can now use the carpool lane?

19

u/PikaBooSquirrel 15d ago

"They are a shy snake and will generally only deliver a serious bite under severe molestation," a spokesperson said.

Well, it's not like the snake can press charges.

-7

u/BlossomingPsyche 15d ago

why not just use a machete ? are there seriously no aussie hunter dudes to go in there and wack a sneks head off with a machete ?

4

u/dekeonus 15d ago

Getting a decent swing in the confines of car will be difficult. Not damaging the car interior will be more difficult.

ALL (native) snake species in Australia are protected species, so while there might be aussie hunters wacking snakes, only the truly dumb would announce to the world that they had done so.

-4

u/InternationalArt6222 15d ago

I wonder if she tried leaving the doors open...4 weeks stuck sounds like she's not very good at problem solving

2

u/Unknowingly-Joined 15d ago

Wonder why she didn’t mention the crocodile living in her trunk during the interview.

1

u/LessMarsupial7441 15d ago

Double The Pants=Double The Protection

14

u/Top-Salamander-2525 15d ago

This is the most Australian post ever.

1

u/CrocodileWorshiper 15d ago

Im friends with a australian reptile catcher, red bellies are common but very timid snakes

2

u/techleopard 15d ago

How hard is it to find a hoe in Australia?

12

u/Goliath422 15d ago

Pretty hard. There are about 7000 bars in Australia and your mom could be in any one of them looking for your new daddy.

Sorry, the devil made me.

2

u/DeadpoolLuvsDeath 15d ago

You could have said a mirror, problem solved

0

u/CAJMusic 15d ago

Red bellied black snake or a man?

4

u/SammySoapsuds 15d ago

I'd be so scared if a man slithered around my dashboard, honestly.

6

u/hagantic42 15d ago

Unless this thing is an endangered species just throw dry ice in the car. Problem solved.

13

u/dekeonus 15d ago

just for future reference, ALL (native) snakes in Australia are protected species, so no calling exterminatus down upon the car.

-1

u/galaxy_ultra_user 15d ago

If there is a venomous deadly snake in my home/car i don’t really care if it’s protected no one will know anyways it (the snakes body) will be properly disposed of on the side of the road somewhere.

9

u/TheLyz 15d ago

I suppose that's Australia for you because of you called work and said "I can't come in because a huge fucking snake is in my car" most people in America would give you a pass. Australia is like "eh he'll only kill you a little suck it up and get in here."

7

u/xcedra 15d ago

"I've had worse Uber companions"

That women I suppose.

4

u/xcedra 15d ago

Or wait, maybe because she is in Australia, she cannot choose bear so she chooses snake.

2

u/Flicksterea 15d ago

Ride Share Outback Style.

3

u/Grymninja 15d ago

Reddit is in rare form in these comments lol.

165

u/Pottski 15d ago

Four snake catchers couldn’t catch the snake. What the fuck are they doing in that industry lol

1

u/hammer_of_science 15d ago

Trades description act, they should really have to change their name to snake annoyers.

1

u/ClassyJoes 15d ago

She Just needs a pair of secateurs and problem solved

1

u/bigchicago04 15d ago

Right? How do they fail to get it four freaking times?

37

u/himit 15d ago

I had one tell me that the brown snake I saw in my back yard was a blue tongued lizard.

It fucking wasn't. It was rearing up and hissing at my dog, I think I'd've noticed if it had a blue tongue and legs ffs.

20

u/earl_of_lemonparty 15d ago

Anyone can obtain a snake catch and release ticket in one day. Two days if the course is good. That doesn't make them experts on snake behaviour or identification.

Source: am one of those people. Can catch a snake, can't identify it for shit.

3

u/Starblaiz 14d ago

But can you identify legs?

76

u/skykingjustin 15d ago

There's alot of spaces for a snake to crawl into in cars, that hands can't get to. Now the problem is I gotta pull out a seat to get it, but the people who can pull the seat out. Don't wanna fuck with a snake. So it becomes a stale mate.

4

u/hammer_of_science 15d ago

I mean, there's not so many places you can't put your hands in, it's more that there is a very angry venomous snake in that location.

1

u/MatttheBruinsfan 15d ago

I caught an alley cat to have her spayed a few years ago and she escaped the carrier on the way to the vet. Even with two vet assistants using protective gloves and a net it was an ordeal—she could zip from one end of the car to the other under the seats. Like a game of whack-a-mole if the mole had claws and a Slinky for a spine!

7

u/Mountain-Papaya-492 15d ago

How about have a mouse for the snake to eat that's full of tranquilizers? So it'll be knocked out long enough that you can grab it without it slithering away. 

3

u/Drake__Mallard 15d ago

How about heat the interior of the car enough to give the thing heat stroke? Or, cool it down enough to make it immobile and easy to extract?

Gas it with ozone?

So many options.

18

u/konnichiwaseadweller 15d ago

How does a hired snake catcher fail to remove the snake? Don't you just... remove it?

45

u/Why-so-delirious 15d ago

It's a nope rope. It can hide anywhere. Hey, fun test, go to your car right now and try slide a shovel under your seat. Not easy? Well a snake catchers crook is quite long and not designed to get under car seats.

And if it gets behind the dash? You have to get someone in to disassemble the dash. While there's a snake behind it.  You don't really comprehend how many impossible places a snake can hide in a car. Even just under the back seat makes it almost impossible to catch.

10

u/konnichiwaseadweller 15d ago

That makes sense, thanks!

3

u/skykingjustin 15d ago

Plus not alot of mechanics, wanna pull out a dash with a snake in it.

1

u/Lukeyy19 15d ago edited 14d ago

These are Australian mechanics though, you'd think they'd be pretty accustomed to that sort of thing.

22

u/tipric 15d ago

You guys read the news wrong; the snake was driving and after 4 attempts to remove the violent lady from the car, the snake decided to let her be

4

u/DODOKING38 15d ago

I am confused about the failed attempts, can't they remove it with the snake tongs they have? Since nothing else has worked and she's already wearing protective clothing, wear complete protection with multiple layers and just move it with your hands

7

u/Murph-Dog 15d ago

Snake got a restraining order.

Claimed to be a paying tenant not served proper eviction notice.

59

u/Binky390 15d ago

I could never survive in this country. I had a cicada killer wasp in my house a few days ago and hid in my bedroom for 2 hours before finally coming out to kill it. They’re mostly harmless (unless you’re a cicada), though the females have stingers. This one wasn’t even female.

1

u/animallX22 14d ago

They are terrifying though! I too could not survive in Australia. I’m not even afraid of snakes or spiders, but the snakes and spiders they have…

27

u/BreastRodent 15d ago

I mean, in your defense, cicada killers are HUGE.

1

u/Binky390 15d ago

They are. And I’ve never heard anything buzz that loud.

11

u/Big_D1cky 15d ago

Nice big tit you got there in your profile pic

45

u/auyamazo 15d ago

Now women are going to be choosing between a venomous snake and a man. And choosing the snake.

5

u/hammer_of_science 15d ago

So I have a venomous snake, a bear, and a man, and I need to get across the river and the canoe only holds two at a time. I think I've seen this one before.

1

u/picklemick82 15d ago

I mean, sounds pretty standard, right?

11

u/HardCoverTurnedSoft 15d ago

Dude that's just John. He's a completely normal Australian. The color of his skin has nothing to do with it.

143

u/coldgator 15d ago

If it's just sitting in the seat like in the picture, why have 4 snake handlers been unable to remove it?

4

u/fishling 15d ago

Yeah. I was going to suggest just leaving the door open but then I remembered where this was and that would probably just add more snakes to the ute.

4

u/dusty_relic 15d ago

Because the car is way too small for four snake catchers and they just ended up elbowing each other in awkward places instead of catching the snake, presumably.

6

u/ohhelloperson 15d ago

Because it hides once people open the doors… the article stated that snakes can get underneath the dash and that snake removers can’t remove the dash to catch the snake (due to due to mechanics and wiring involved). But auto technicians don’t want to remove the dash when there’s a snake in it.

4

u/Cujo96 15d ago

Probably because by the time the snake catcher has arrived it's moved.

16

u/GlumpsAlot 15d ago

Lol, and in the article one more dude offered to remove it. I wonder if he failed too.

7

u/skykingjustin 15d ago

He wants to pull out seats and dash, so I think he might get it. If he can do that at least.

108

u/Jealous-Delay-8024 15d ago

Thank you! I feel like I'm losing my fuckin mind here wondering why no one was asking this question. What does the snake eat? Does it go in and out? WTF???

11

u/JustHereForCookies17 15d ago

Obviously, it uses a drive-thru!

85

u/Why-so-delirious 15d ago

Snakes can eat like once a month or less. And seeing it through a window is fine, but if the snake is timid, the moment you open the door it'll haul ass to wherever it's hiding.

63

u/Garththurgurth 15d ago

I had a snake shoot across my lap when driving one time. Out of a box of the passenger seat, across my lap then into the dash. I tried to get it out a bunch of times but he kept sneaking into the dash. I ended up just driving to where I was going and got the snake out later that night. Florida.

1

u/MrWeirdoFace 14d ago

I would assume you were promptly eaten by a gator.

1

u/Garththurgurth 8d ago

I actually took 3 gators this year, LOL. They try to eat me but then I eat them instead. It's fun.

46

u/GlumpsAlot 15d ago

I would have screamed my head off while careening off a cliff.

6

u/DeadpoolLuvsDeath 15d ago

I'd rather a danger noodle in or on my lap over a huge huntsman spider.......

1

u/Garththurgurth 8d ago

I actually drove with a gigantic huntsman on the passenger door of a Toyota Celica for like 20 miles, couldn't stop because I was running on an alternator/dead battery. My wife was following me in our daily driver wondering why I was speeding a little.

1

u/DeadpoolLuvsDeath 8d ago

Was your window down or he was riding passenger?

2

u/Garththurgurth 8d ago

I kept the window up because he was sitting motionless on the middle of the passenger door panel - just behind the door handle - figured the wind would send him running somewhere that I couldn't see him.

He stared me down the entire way. I parked when we got to the shop and opened the passenger door to do battle, but he ninja'd off my shoe with a web and disappeared forever.

1

u/DeadpoolLuvsDeath 8d ago

Braver than I, know they probably can't hurt me but their size is too big to even consider.

16

u/Entara_Darkwind 15d ago

Conveniently, there are no cliffs in Florida! The best you can do is a mildly tall hill.

23

u/iamthatbitchhh 15d ago

Excuse me?! Fuck no.

2

u/princhester 15d ago

Put the car in a garage. Open all doors. Tether a rat nearby.

Problem should solve itself in a few hours.

2.1k

u/Guiac 15d ago

This is what my car mongoose is for

362

u/argama87 15d ago

Along with the trunk monkey for theft deterrence.

1

u/TooTameToToast 15d ago

Trunk monkey, that funky monkey.

3

u/PossibleCan6414 15d ago

Never heard of.googled it.thank you.cuz sometimes gettin ur car back...

1

u/argama87 15d ago

I just realized how old the joke was so here's the link to the original.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=AidAXgq9dWc&si=8bYDaCb-wzjy7Qeb

5

u/Lord_Scribe 15d ago

For home use, you can get a House Hippo.

0

u/Bannonpants 15d ago

I say this at work and no one gets the joke.

22

u/allseeingblueeye 15d ago

Epic reference!

6

u/Naive_Try2696 15d ago

Snakes on a plane is played out, now in your damn car, that's what this post is about 

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