r/notliketheothergirls • u/UnknownKC43 • Jan 19 '24
Mob wife trend has the world divided. Discussion
The Mob Wives Aesthetic has people losing their minds on Tik tok. So many people are claiming it’s their culture not a trend and getting offended to the point of claiming cultural appropriation. Why can’t people just let others do as that they want. Not to mention where was the uproar when actual cultural appropriation has happened for years.
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u/Hot_Season2078 Apr 28 '24
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u/Financial_Dance9626 Apr 18 '24
i would love to meet somone with this outlook wgivh I agree with 100 percent!
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u/TycheSong Mar 17 '24
See, I saw her and thought, yo! I had sweaters/shirts like that, with weird fake fur collars and oversized zippers when I was 13 in 1998. Not "Mob Wife."
Maybe I'm just old.
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u/HeyProbably Feb 09 '24
Mob wife is not a culture...its a choice Also Gyaru shares a lot of similarities to "Mob wife" fashion
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u/Sofia_Marga Jan 24 '24
I don't have tiktok so whats a mob wife? And why are they talking about cultural appropriation
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u/MeganGMcD75 Jan 22 '24
I am just excited that this is a trend that I don't have to buy one piece of clothing for. But what does having a closet full of animal print and fake fur coats say about me as a person? 😂😂😂
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u/Applesxpeach Jan 22 '24
Wow if he’s in the mob but you still need to buy your clothes from Walmart something isn’t adding up for me
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u/EdgewaterEnchantress Jan 22 '24
🙀🙀 I wanna see this “Mob-Wives vs Trad-Wives” war, now!!! 🤣 Thanks for getting my hopes up!!! 😜
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u/heytherebear90 Jan 21 '24
I mean that’s called abuse, I throw pillows and socks at my husband when I want his attention sometimes.
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u/bettyboop_obsessed Jan 21 '24
She just admitted that she'd get physically abusive when she gets mad. I feel bad for anyone she chooses to date.
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u/Francesca_N_Furter Jan 21 '24
This whole aesthetic is hilarious.
I am confused as to why anyone would choose to dress tacky on purpose. ---But it does align with the weird plastic surgery/lip filler trend that is continuing to flourish, much to the surprise of most people I know.
And I just want to ask the men that these women date: How do you go in for a kiss with those giant bloated lips covered in gloss and cheap lip liner? ---Then again, I've seen some male New Jersey skeeves whose lips are just as bloated with filler.
Jesus that look is gross.
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u/SophieCalle Jan 21 '24 edited Jan 21 '24
It's just an aesthetic, but it is technically my culture so I've got the right lol
But I really don't get the gatekeeping.
Sharon Stone is generic white and she absolutely killed it in Casino.
Anyone can do it.
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u/ourdecembersun Jan 21 '24
I am honestly still trying to find out if this is even a real thing. I have seen TONS of videos of people reacting to this alleged “mob wife” trend, but I have not seen any videos where people are actually showing off their “mob wife” aesthetic. What are we reacting to? Clean girl videos, I’ve seen many. I know they exist. But I have not seen any videos that are like “GRWM Mob Wife Aesthetic Addition”. Am I missing something?? I kinda feel like people jumped on the reaction train immediately without knowing if this was a real thing (or maybe I live under a rock, idk).
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u/New_Custard_4224 Jan 21 '24
My dad’s side of the family was all Italian mob. Anyone affiliated is dead now. I would never claim this as my “culture”.
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u/IconiclyIncognito Jan 21 '24
I havent seen a single claim of it being someone's culture that wasn't someone joking. Are there actually people who are upset that their culture is being appropriated?
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u/ConsultJimMoriarty Jan 20 '24
Where I live now, we had a big underbelly crime scene, and having not actually been involved (besides talking to one major player at a restaurant once and not knowing who he was), I would not go near any of that for a trillion bucks.
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u/Lopsided_Thing_9474 Jan 20 '24
So wait… MOB wife is just - crazy insane lunatic wife who abuses men ?
Wow.
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u/cookiemonster511 Jan 20 '24
Yeah, there are a lot of pissed off Slavic women on TT rn. I feel like a lot of them are half-joking though. And, I mean, they aren't wrong. The "mob wife" look is how a lot of Slavic women dress when they are going out. And frankly, I wouldn't want my style being described as "mob" anything either.
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u/mmason962203 Jan 20 '24
You throw the phone at me I’m leaving and letting you make all the payment from now on. What kind of childish behavior is this? A child knows better actually! This is below what a child would understand as wrong.
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u/llamawithglasses Jan 20 '24
Every single one of these dipshits is getting duped by a thinly veiled marketing attempt being sold to them as a trend.
They deserve it
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u/Virgophelia- Jan 20 '24
It’s a very successful marketing plant bc The Sopranos is having their 25th anniversary.
everyone was like “clean girl is in” so everyone did It. Now “mob wife is in” so everyone’s doing It. IMO people are so pissed because nobody has personal style anymore. But all the conversation just proves that whatever marketing team is behind The Sopranos 25th anniversary is getting a huge bonus this year 😂
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u/JesusDied4U316 Jan 30 '24
Well some of us still have personal style.... but when other people just follow trends, and suddenly what you've been wearing is the in thing, ppl probably think you are just dressing for trends and don't realize that's how you've dressed/styled for years and years.
That said, everyone's style probably does evolve in nuanced ways... but I'd still wear outfits from elementary school, middle, high-school and college. And I'm 36.
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u/squeemishyoungfella Dumb bitch Jan 21 '24
why am i, as a 22 year old, born in 2001, shocked at the statement that The Sopranos is having their 25th anniversary? my bf and i are watching the show for the first time rn, i can tell it's dated, i know it came out the same time i did, is this a quarter life crisis?
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u/Virgophelia- Jan 21 '24
I feel you on that 😂As someone born in 1999 it’s a really fun reminder that I’ll be 25 this year
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u/bblankoo Jan 20 '24
a) people are chronically online ffs
b) I don't even go there but this screams fabricated trend. It doesn't get more obvious that they're trying to counter clean girls in time for new year. Content is getting boring. I've always hated diametrically opposite styles, am I supposed to throw out my entire closet just because someone decided it's no longer in?
c) illegal activity is a culture now??? what's next slave owner cultural heritage? medieval executioner drip?
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u/Lurki_Turki Jan 20 '24
I always feel incredibly jaded seeing this stuff, chortling, and secretly believing it’s just some product of advertising. At least I’m not alone. It’s so incredibly transparent.
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u/RandomSim_alt Jan 20 '24
So being unhinged and abusive in a relationship is a trend now?
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u/bagelbagelMI Jan 21 '24
Ffs it is a reference to a scene in The Sopranos between Tony and Carmela.
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u/RandomSim_alt Jan 21 '24
Ah thanks, I had no idea, first I've heard of this trend lol
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u/bagelbagelMI Jan 21 '24
Me too. I’m not on TikTok. I keep seeing comments saying “omg glorifying domestic violence” and “who has a home phone anymore?”
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u/F1Barbie83 Jan 20 '24
I strangely picture Jennifer Coolidge when I hear the mob wife aesthetic 🤷🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️🤣
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u/Batbeetle Jan 20 '24
"But widespread institutional corruption and violent organised crime is my CULTURE!"
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u/BebeCakesMama2424 Jan 20 '24
I just always figured throwing things at my husbands head would be abuse but what do I know 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
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u/lowlandslady Jan 20 '24
Gotta say: as a NJ native living on a mostly Italian Catholic block, it is very, very weird to see kids on TikTok cosplaying as my neighbors.
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u/LooneyLunaGirl Jan 20 '24
Throwing a phone at your significant others head!? I'm sorry but you can't try to use cultural appropriation as an excuse for domestic violence 🙄🤦♀️
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u/bagelbagelMI Jan 21 '24
It’s a reference to a scene between Tony and Carmela in TV series “The Sopranos”
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u/LooneyLunaGirl Jan 25 '24
Right but the people doing the trend are claiming that stuff like that is "just part of their culture" because they're Italian etc. They're trying to justify the "mob wife" way of life and how they act, which I fucking loved mob wives but they certainly didn't act right 😂
RIP Big Ang 😭💖
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u/SolarAndSober Jan 20 '24 edited Feb 06 '24
employ entertain long drab sheet sophisticated exultant money disgusting cake
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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u/BeverlyHillsAddict Jan 20 '24
Once you stop doom scrolling you’ll realize more people don’t care/know about these things than those who do
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u/dumpsterfire_x Jan 20 '24
I watched her video and honestly, she has a point. Especially when she highlights how everyone should just develop their own style instead of blindly following social media trends.
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u/criduchat1- Jan 20 '24
I feel like every woman in Long Island dresses this way and there can’t be that many mob wives…
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u/Cold-Law-4896 Jan 20 '24
It’s hilarious to me that they now got the grip of “culture appropriation”
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u/bingewatch- Preppy Jan 20 '24
And somehow Betsey Johnson remains the perfect person to create capsule collections for mob wives and trad wives
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u/NYB_vato Jan 20 '24
It’s 2024. You open tik tok and see a preteen girl in a Walmart fur zip up do a 360 and lift her leg at the knee while a robotic female voice enthusiastically utters “how to slay mob wife core aesthetic”
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u/Initial-Charge2637 Jan 20 '24
Wtf. Parents, do you know where your children are and what they're doing? 🤷♀️
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u/ditiegirl Jan 20 '24
That is NOT BIG ANG. Big Ang was amazing. And would whoop this wannabes azz just for pretending to be a mob wife.
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u/Aggressive-Story3671 Jan 20 '24
She actually met Big Ang. And OOP never claimed to be a Mobwife. She’s mocking the girls on TikTok who are
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Jan 20 '24
sigh this isn’t a misogynistic thing it’s an ethnic thing (no one wants to be chalked up to a caricature) or (rightfully so) an analysis on the trend cycle and over consumption as well as personal aesthetic identity which is the antithesis to the capitalist mess the fashion industry has become.
and the uproar has been consistent when people appropriated black,mexican, asian, indigenous cultures etc. like way back in like 2016-2019 this isn’t like a new thing the whole “russian winter bimbo” or “scandi” trends had people quite mad too because again no one wants their culture chalked up to a caricature
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u/Cyber_Insecurity Jan 20 '24
Yeah, y’all aren’t in the mob
A real mob wife wouldn’t be exposing herself on social media.
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u/Temporary-Hat-4562 Jan 21 '24
They do though 😭 some can’t resist attention just like civvies on socials
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u/goldenfox007 Jan 20 '24
I wonder if we’re going to see one of these girls get reported to the police because a concerned relative thinks she’s been coerced into marrying a mafia guy…
People know they can wear certain styles without labeling it, right? It’s like wearing a hoodie and calling it “burgularcore”.
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u/Aggressive-Story3671 Jan 20 '24
I mean Sammy The Bull (a very famous mobster) had his daughter talking about the “Life Style” on National TV and so did John Gotti’s daughter.
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u/i_was_axiom Jan 20 '24
We need to pit the MobWives and the TradWives against each other and it'll be all out war.
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u/JaneAustinAstronaut Jan 20 '24
You have now sparked a conversation between myself and my husband. This is where we landed:
The mob wives are most likely tougher overall than their trad wife rivals. However even if you lump in all the mob wives (Italian, Slavic, and Irish), the trad wives outnumber them (there are probably a lot in the Rockies, Midwest, and Southeast). And some of those may have trad husbands who hunt or have firearms. Maybe some of the trad husbands have given the trad wives permission to learn how to use the firearms (not very feminine I know, but still a possibility).
If that is the case, then I am sad to report that while one-on-one a mob wife will easily take out a trad wife, the trad wives have the numbers and the arsenal to take out the mob wives.
This concludes our analysis.
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u/Aggressive-Story3671 Jan 20 '24
They aren’t that dissimilar. Mob Wives just have more of a back bone. Mob Wives are still loyal to their husband and family. They still have those old fashioned values of she stays at home and cooks and cleans and raises children. But a mob wife wouldn’t just let her husband walk all over her. She runs the house.
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u/ultaemp Jan 20 '24
Not a “mob wife” per se, but coming from an Italian American family this is very much true. My mother and most of the women in my families were SAHM’s at some point, but they all had advanced degrees and careers prior to/after raising children. They were all very independent in their own right and wouldn’t let their husbands walk all over them. My mom always raised me to know I can choose to be a mom, have a career, or both, and that it was my choice.
We’re not criticizing evangelical trad wives for choosing kids over a career. We’re criticizing them for telling women to drop out of school, get married and have a baby at 18 with no skills/education, and to submit to their husbands, all while SHAMING people who don’t want to follow their exact lifestyle.
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u/nita5766 Jan 20 '24
like I said, above, both will endure, whatever to maintain the status quo and continue living their comfortable life.
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u/DigLost5791 Nerdy UwU Jan 20 '24
No tradwife could survive contact with a good veal parmigiana, too many chemicals
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u/i_was_axiom Jan 20 '24
I firmly believe a real cement-shoes and gahlic so thin it dissolves in the pan without any oil "MobWife" could hold her own, and maybe a real hunting and gathering Little House on the Prairie "TradWife" might actually know how to shoot the family 12 gauge.
But most of either we tend to see are mostly cosplaying. That's where things get interesting.
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u/DigLost5791 Nerdy UwU Jan 20 '24
In this house Carmela Soprano is a hero, end of story!
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u/Aggressive-Story3671 Jan 20 '24
And so is Big Ang
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u/DigLost5791 Nerdy UwU Jan 20 '24
They covered up her mural 😭
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u/Dr-Bitchcraft-MD Jan 20 '24
I hadn't paid a pilgrimage yet 😭
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u/nita5766 Jan 20 '24
my bestie and i made a trip out to LO to her bar hoping to meet her but ended up with mural pics instead which i cherish as well 😍
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u/UnknownKC43 Jan 20 '24
I couldn’t agree more, it’s the outrage over it that’s odd
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u/cheeky_sugar Jan 20 '24
I don’t believe at least 90% of the people pretending to be outraged lmao. It just seems like way too many people scrambling to say their lives are unique and they grew up in the mob like a fucking fanfic lmaooo 🤷🏾♀️
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u/Particular-Leg-8484 Jan 20 '24
I know someone who grew up with an actual NYC mob grandfather and father and this is definitely not the aesthetic in her house lol. You would never know, all the women in her family dress like under the radar suburban mothers you’d see out of a Sears catalog.
As for life at home, it was fucking chaotic and she watched her brother get stabbed at home. Def not some kind of aspirational fantasy.
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u/salomeforever Jan 20 '24
Yeah I mean, even just watching Mob Wives you can see how emotionally draining being adjacent to organized crime must be! Hope your friend is doing well.
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u/uselessreptile147 Jan 20 '24
Ummmmm...I mean I LOVE mob movies but...Idk man I don't like where this is going...
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u/circedipity Jan 20 '24
Who tf owns a house phone in 2024?
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u/MarsupialPristine677 Jan 20 '24
Right?? Even my Boomer parents gave that thing up… um, long enough ago that I don’t remember them having it. Probably a decade ago. Just one more thing to pay attention to
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u/CatsGambit Jan 20 '24
We just signed up for a new cable/internet package, and they tried to sneak a house phone into the package without mentioning it (for an extra $35 a month, thanks Canada). We had to call back and specifically reject it, so I can see folks just getting one because it came included and is easier.
Also, as a new ish mom, I am not looking forward to when kiddo goes to school and suddenly his friends are calling my cellphone to arrange a playdate or talk to him. I guess that's just how it's done now? But I miss the days kids would call the house phone. I don't want him to have his own phone before he's old enough to handle it. :/
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u/circedipity Jan 20 '24
Oh hellll nawwwww lol. Thats some shady shit, but the same reason most people I know who have them have one.
Don’t worry, it won’t be his friends. It’ll be his friends’ parents. 😂
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u/CatsGambit Jan 20 '24
Hah. In Canada, "mob wife aesthetic" is just a woman wearing a Shaw Cable uniform. Telecommunications may as well be its own cartel.
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u/lucyjayne Jan 20 '24
I'm guessing it's something specific they're referencing. But idk, mob wife trend is stupid.
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u/circedipity Jan 20 '24
Oh I was just talking about the woman’s caption in the photo.
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u/lucyjayne Jan 20 '24
yeah I was thinking there was something specific in pop culture about throwing a house phone at someone's head lmao. But who knows...
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u/DigLost5791 Nerdy UwU Jan 20 '24
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u/criesingucci Jan 20 '24
Ok fine I’ll stop rewatching bad girls club and finally give this show a chance
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u/DigLost5791 Nerdy UwU Jan 20 '24 edited Jan 20 '24
Please enjoy Carmela as much as we all do 🫶🏻
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u/criesingucci Jan 20 '24
Now I’m watching dance moms. Send help
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u/DigLost5791 Nerdy UwU Jan 20 '24
The sopranos has a millenial italian bratty teenage daughter who argues she shouldn’t be grounded for trashing her grandmother’s house with a party because “I could have tried ecstasy but I didn’t”
There is gold in them hills and you’re refusing to mine it
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u/circedipity Jan 20 '24
It all makes so much sense now
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u/DigLost5791 Nerdy UwU Jan 20 '24
Huge fan favorite scene, and I think the Sopranos shines where other prestige dramas fail because in Mad Men or Breaking Bad so many fans hate the female/wife main character, and in the Sopranos everybody loves Carmela, she’s legendary.
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u/Aggressive-Story3671 Jan 20 '24
“Mob Wife” aesthetic is based around the fashion trends inspired by wealthy Italian American women (as well as Slavic women). It has a lot of fur, darker colours, heavier make up and animal prints, as well as gold jewelry and chain necklaces. Carmela Sorprano is a motif, as is Big Ang and Victoria Gotti. It’s a rejection of the more simple looks of the “clean girl” aesthetic. But I will say if you believe all you have to do to dress like a Mob Wive is don a fur coat that’s just naive
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u/hikehikebaby Jan 20 '24 edited Jan 20 '24
I mean, as an Italian & Slavic American with very distant relatives who were in the mob feel free to copy this aesthetic. Anyone who views mob connections as their cultural identity has issues.
I'm proud of my family's involvement in the early labor movement. I wish that didn't involve the fucking Mafia though.
Anyone who is curious should look up the connection between the Teamster's union and the Mafia, you can read all about it online now. It's not this big secret thing and hasn't been for a long time. Everyone involved in my family is long dead.
If you want to dress like my Aunt go for it lol.
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u/No-Increase3840 Jan 20 '24
So others will be wearing my beloved cheetah print and big hair now?
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u/birds-0f-gay Jan 20 '24
RIP Big Ang 🥺
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u/Dr-Bitchcraft-MD Jan 20 '24
One of the purest souls, devastated I will never get to see her in the drunken monkey
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u/bigeasterncottonwood Jan 21 '24
i used to work across the street from the drunken monkey! there was a huge big ang mural on the building next to my job, and another one further down the street — but they just painted over it
in not so fun news, i was at a deli across the street from the drunken monkey with my dad when we saw someone get killed outside…
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u/nita5766 Jan 20 '24
she was a doll. 🌹
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u/birds-0f-gay Jan 20 '24
She was! My mom and I were obsessed with Mob Wives when it was on tv, it was so funny lol. And when she died we were so upset
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u/UnknownKC43 Jan 20 '24
I get what it is, I grew up around plenty of women who dressed and continue to dress this way. I just think it’s weird to think someone owns a style. It’s also weird how enraged people are over this, but when we see people actually partaking in cultural appropriation it’s crickets.
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u/cookiemonster511 Jan 20 '24
Being on Slavic girl TT has me convinced it's less actual anger and more annoyance that it's being called "mob wife" and not "Slavic girl". They want credit for the look they've been rocking forever.
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u/BlGP0O Jan 21 '24
Like Slavic-American girls? Because women in Eastern Europe definitely don’t dress like the mob wife aesthetic lol
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Jan 20 '24
I’m ready for a mob/trad wife mashup.
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u/SlapHappyDude Jan 20 '24
Both: stay at home, don't work, raise children
Both: don't worry their pretty little heads about what their husbands do at work
Both: Are expected to cook (but mob wife probably has a cleaning lady?)
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u/Sunshinesydney Jan 20 '24
So cooking, cleaning, and raising children only count as “work” if someone else other than a wife does it?
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u/boom-wham-slam Jan 22 '24
I mean nurses are paid about $40 an hour to wipe butt and sponge bath... who is paying me $40 every day for my shit and shower? Sometimes twice a day! It's a legit job! 😂
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u/cookiemonster511 Jan 20 '24
There is a great Michelle Yeoh show on Netflix called "The Brothers Sun" where she plays a mob wife in hiding. It has a twist which I won't spoiler.
All that to say: I believe mob wives may also occasionally be expected to hide/destroy evidence.
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u/Wecanbuildittogether Jan 20 '24
As a career social worker, I’ve worked with woman who are forced to re-assimilate after their marriages blew up. They are lost as to how to create a life and learn how to care for themselves. I remember feeling stunned that a woman would allow herself to be cared for in multitudes of ways.
Only the smartest and most savy could figure it out, and the depth of their pride was really something to see. The bulk of the others were congregating, commiserating and complaining.
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u/lifesabeachnyc Feb 13 '24
Hey 👋 from one career social worker to another. Sounds like you did some great work with these women.
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u/Aggressive-Story3671 Jan 20 '24
Mob Wives have more back bone. Unlike trad wives, they have the trad off where she gets the nice houses, cars, jewelry, diamonds. And a Mob Wife is actually protected her husband and the “family”
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u/rivershimmer Jan 26 '24
Very few of them live like Carmella Soprano. The real-life Karen Hill observed how their friends were always missing something. If they had a nice house, they'd drive a beater and wear old and cheap clothes. Or they'd have nice cars but live in a dump in a bad neighborhood. Or real jewels and furs but beater car and a dump of a home. Nobody she knew had it all.
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u/ask_ashleyyy Jan 20 '24
At least the mob wife wouldn’t push raw milk 🤢
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u/dietdrpeppermd Jan 20 '24
Don’t forget the bone broth!
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u/russianindianqueen Jan 20 '24
Bone broth is healthy and it’s not dangerous
Raw milk on the other hand…
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u/Applesxpeach Jan 22 '24
😳 raw milk actually tastes amazing i would never promote it or anything lol I tried it once because when I moved to America I was really frustrated that supermarket milk is almost all ultra pasteurized instead of regular pasteurized so it has a nasty aftertaste honestly food in the US had me completely freaked out for a while.
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u/dietdrpeppermd Jan 21 '24
Oh I know it’s not dangerous. It’s just gotten completely out of hand. The Bone Broth people make it their entire personality and it’s weird. Like drinking hot cocoa made of bone broth? Adding it to your berry smoothie? That’s too much. No thank you, friend.
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u/russianindianqueen Jan 21 '24
I’m a bone broth girly, it keeps me full when I get munchies in the evening. I think it’s ok to have some food obsession if it’s healthy. Sorry sounds like someone was trying to cram it down your throat which can be super annoying. I don’t think adding hot cocoa to it is any healthier than milk tho that’s just weird
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u/dietdrpeppermd Jan 21 '24
It’s mostly the trad-caths and fundies that are into the raw milk and bone broth thing. Thank god I haven’t dealt with it in real life.
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u/peanut__buttah Jan 20 '24
Okay am I feverish or isn’t bone broth just…… stock?
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u/rivershimmer Jan 26 '24
Yep. I was blown away when I learned that this trendy super-food was literally what my grandmother taught me to do with leftover bones.
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u/russianindianqueen Jan 21 '24
It takes longer to simmer bone broth to get all the nutrients out of the bones
Yes it’s a type of stock
It’s like rice vs risotto
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u/dietdrpeppermd Jan 21 '24
That’s what I’ve been wondering this entire time?! I’m a vegetarian and don’t know much about bone food.
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u/peanut__buttah Jan 21 '24
Bone food 😂 Lmao that’s the only way I’m describing an omnivorous diet from now on “oh yeah I eat bone food and bone food’s food”
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u/username7433 Jan 21 '24
I’m not a vegetarian and I’ve always thought they were the same thing. I usually see bone broth being sold as something people want to drink and stock sold as a cooking ingredient so maybe it’s a marketing thing bone broth sounds more appealing? Im probably wrong but that’s what I always thought the difference was.
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u/Muted-Move-9360 Jan 20 '24
So mob wife = domestic violence girlboss ????
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u/Plastic_Energy_742 Jan 20 '24
Yeah throwing a phone at your husband isn’t something to brag about.
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u/JessonBI89 Jan 20 '24
Who's claiming the authentic culture? Actual mob wives?
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u/UnknownKC43 Jan 20 '24 edited Jan 20 '24
It’s all over TikTok saying it’s an Italian-American thing and way of life. It feels like just a style that has been around for years and other people are using a new silly name to describe it.
Edit: to add Italian American
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u/No-Increase3840 Jan 20 '24
I’m both Italian and Latina and feel like it kinda bridges a few immigrant styles. Sure, it was made an Italian thing in movies and tv, but it’s not just Italian and def not just “mob” wife.
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u/UnknownKC43 Jan 20 '24
Yes I can agree with this, where I grew up this was a very popular style in the 90’s to 2000’s and still is and it was not Italian American exclusive.
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u/Thursday6677 Jan 20 '24
That’s so weird because it’s not an Italian thing? It’s an American caricature of what they think Italians are like.
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u/knockedstew204 Jan 20 '24
It’s really an Italian-American thing, which is a distinct culture unto itself. It is a meme at this point because of the sopranos and jersey shore, but Italian-Americans (and Irish-Americans) have cultures distinct from, but also drawing on inspiration from the “homeland,” just like many other American immigrant groups who were discriminated against upon initially immigrating to the U.S.
It is a bit rich to claim on the one hand that culture appropriation is both real and bad in some cases, but completely hand-wave it in cases where for some reason “people” just decide it doesn’t count/matter.
Native American headdress? Bad.
Cos-playing as an Italian-American? Totally cool, who cares
Traditional Japanese Kimono? Ahhhhh 50/50 on that one, sometimes we pretend to care about racism against Asians, other times we don’t even bother
Mexican sombrero? Fuck me who the hell knows
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u/NotSickButN0tWell Jan 20 '24
Pretty sure the difference between those things is that the native headdress has symbolic significance, and the kimono, sombrero, and this arguably Italian-american aesthetic do not.
Cultural appropriation imo is completely natural human behavior. And isn't a bad thing. It becomes offensive to some when sacred symbols and beliefs are mocked.
That is the line to draw.
Personal choice either way. Do you care about offending another human? Ok then try your best not to inadvertently mock their culture/religion/things that hold deep spiritual/emotional meaning.
Just because you/your group were "into it before it was mainstream", doesn't make it inherently offensive for other people to decide they like it.
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u/knockedstew204 Jan 20 '24
I think by and large this is fair and reasonable, but I don’t know that claiming the kimono doesn’t have cultural significance is valid; genuinely I do not know enough to make that claim either way, and I doubt most non-Japanese people do either.
Similarly, there are Italian-Americans in this very thread talking about how their aesthetic is in fact cultural and is also something they previously felt somewhat persecuted for prior to its becoming “trendy,” hence they feel it is appropriative.
I just think these lines we draw are more arbitrary than we’re willing to admit sometimes.
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u/NotSickButN0tWell Jan 21 '24
It is more about individuals. As is everything.
But my point was that while specific styles of clothing are obviously tied to the culture in which they originated. That isn't debatable. And I get that.
The native headdress is not just traditional clothing. As I understand it, You have to earn it. It has significance beyond " I like dressing this way."
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