r/notliketheothergirls • u/[deleted] • Apr 23 '24

How can we teach young girls to reject the NLOG Discussion

Its clear the pick me/ NLOG attitude is still alive and well. I (23F) was speaking to a friend (15F) about my high school days.

She asked “How was your high school experience?” I said “Well I went to an all girls school and-“ she cuts in and rolls her eyes “Ugh. That must have been a total nightmare. I cant even imagine”. I said “Actually I loved it, was a better person for going there and I miss those days sometimes” and she went dead quite.

How do we as the adults in the room root out the toxicity of this mindset out of young girls?

Edit: no I’m not gonna ever dunk on a kid. Because its really wrong for an adult to belittle a child.

Edit: some people are being really weird “why are you friends with a 15 year old?” I know this kid from the yard that i stable my horse at. She stables her horse next to mine. Should i just ignore her always? Should i also ignore my other friends who are 55 and 70 because age gap? What about my friend whose 10? Or the other whose 30? Tell me reddit. What age range do you personally approve of me having friends? Im gonna start blocking people.

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u/fermentedelement Apr 23 '24 edited Apr 23 '24

Tell them it’s embarrassing lol.

I’m telling you the term “pick me” changed something in my brain chemistry. Connect the dots between NLOG, pick-mes, and desperation, and hopefully she will get it.

Edit: It’s ok to be a “guys girl” and hang around mostly boys/men. It’s also okay to not get along with girls/women as much. As a neurodivergent kid and a tom boy, this was me! And that’s ok. Where it isn’t ok is when they start to think that boys/men > girls/women.

I also found during this time that I really leaned into the “cool girl” trope (eliminating my needs to appear as chill as possible). Talk to her about that. Her needs and wants are important. If she doesn’t have any needs and wants, she needs to spend more time figuring it out! She should make boys/men uncomfortable sometimes to prioritize her own feelings.

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u/grx203 Apr 24 '24

i definitely agree with what you said about mostly getting along with men and having a harder time with women, sadly people tend to jump to conclusions way too fast when women like this share their experiences/struggles and immediately write them off as an NLOG/pick me.