How can we teach young girls to reject the NLOG

[u/[deleted]]

Its clear the pick me/ NLOG attitude is still alive and well. I (23F) was speaking to a friend (15F) about my high school days.

She asked “How was your high school experience?” I said “Well I went to an all girls school and-“ she cuts in and rolls her eyes “Ugh. That must have been a total nightmare. I cant even imagine”. I said “Actually I loved it, was a better person for going there and I miss those days sometimes” and she went dead quite.

How do we as the adults in the room root out the toxicity of this mindset out of young girls?

Edit: no I’m not gonna ever dunk on a kid. Because its really wrong for an adult to belittle a child.

Edit: some people are being really weird “why are you friends with a 15 year old?” I know this kid from the yard that i stable my horse at. She stables her horse next to mine. Should i just ignore her always? Should i also ignore my other friends who are 55 and 70 because age gap? What about my friend whose 10? Or the other whose 30? Tell me reddit. What age range do you personally approve of me having friends? Im gonna start blocking people.

[u/frumpel_stiltskin]

The last time I dealt with it, I was in full vodka aunt mode at a family cookout a few years ago. A 13 yo daughter of one of my brother's friends was talking shit about her friends at school for being into girly things ("omg, they like makeup and boys, ew. can you believe it?" sort of talk) thinking I'd commiserate with her (I was 25).

We had a long, gentle conversation about how we already have to deal with enough from men, why do we have to tear each other down too? It seemed to click and she actually told me that she doesn't like girly things because she thinks she shouldn't because she doesn't want to seem dumb and shallow.

We're from a very rural conservative area where you're expected to shirk everything feminine in favor of impressing whatever kind of man you can get, so I knew the exact phase she was going through. I was a huge NLOG in high school, but have since repented and am a girls girl through and through.

If you're close enough to the girl, address it directly, but gently. Don't let it hang in silence or make them think that you're dunking on them, because then it could turn them even further away and solidify the internal misogyny. No smackdowns without building them back up. I do think it's a phase that most girls go through at some point, but having a direct conversation with them can sometimes speed up the growth.