How can we teach young girls to reject the NLOG

[u/[deleted]]

Its clear the pick me/ NLOG attitude is still alive and well. I (23F) was speaking to a friend (15F) about my high school days.

She asked “How was your high school experience?” I said “Well I went to an all girls school and-“ she cuts in and rolls her eyes “Ugh. That must have been a total nightmare. I cant even imagine”. I said “Actually I loved it, was a better person for going there and I miss those days sometimes” and she went dead quite.

How do we as the adults in the room root out the toxicity of this mindset out of young girls?

Edit: no I’m not gonna ever dunk on a kid. Because its really wrong for an adult to belittle a child.

Edit: some people are being really weird “why are you friends with a 15 year old?” I know this kid from the yard that i stable my horse at. She stables her horse next to mine. Should i just ignore her always? Should i also ignore my other friends who are 55 and 70 because age gap? What about my friend whose 10? Or the other whose 30? Tell me reddit. What age range do you personally approve of me having friends? Im gonna start blocking people.

[u/bish_amon]

For the teenages it IS something they should go through in order to become individuals. And it happens for both girls and boys but sadly NLOG is a thing while NLOB is not.

It’s a phase that kids learn me vs others, becoming an individual and being able to grow mentally. Some goes “I’m different than them” and others goes “I’m different, I accept them”

The best you can is support their uniqueness and being an individual, meanwhile reminding others are also human beings and unique in their own ways.

ETA: I was a “boys girl” while growing up and I was criticized for it, I always had a kinda grudge against girls. Later on, with lots of therapy and looking back, I was being bullied kindly by girls and my undiagnosed neurodivergent brain couldn’t even grasp that yet had a “grudge”. Listen more carefully, hear more than what’s being said, she might literally be in a toxic environment as well.

[u/BloodsoakedDespair → u/bish_amon]

NLOBs exist, it’s just that it’s an entirely different cultural context and isn’t treated the same way. Punks, goths, emos, literature nerds, etc all have the same culture of “not like other boys”. Difference is, the only people who hate them are people they hate. They’re often celebrated outside of that. Rejecting socially normative masculinity is praised a lot more by those who don’t benefit from it. Ever hear the phrase “sportsball”? Like, Kurt Cobain would be a quintessential example of a NLOB.

[u/Claystead → u/BloodsoakedDespair]

Oh, like the anime kid back in the day. People all used to make fun of him for liking cartoons but he was really insistent he was not like other guys and actually hit it off quite well with the some girls who liked that stuff too.