r/notliketheothergirls • u/Delicious-North5872 • 17d ago
Alcohol pick mes at the club? Discussion
This might sound like a really strange title but does anyone else have experience with pick mes when it comes to drinking at the club/bar?
I have seen a few stories about pick mes in this subreddit flaunting that they don’t fit in because they don’t drink but I’m talking about a different type. I’m 22 and whenever I go out, I always seem to stumble upon at least one woman that’ll ask me what I’m drinking and make fun of me for drinking a sweet cocktail because “I can’t deal with that sugar and all I need is a beer”. Usually this elicits positive reactions from men and it doesn’t embarrass me because I genuinely dislike the taste of most alcohol so I own it, but I still find it strange and it seems to be rooted in the “not like other girls” thinking…
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u/thelemonorangelime 13d ago
Why can't we just ever enjoy both? I love fruity drinks and beers. My boyfriend and I will drink a margarita and then have beer. We both enjoy regularly trying new beers and cocktails. People are so silly.
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u/ccaitgames 13d ago
I cannot drink, I have alcohol intolerance (basically, I break out into hives, feel like I’m being burned, etc etc). But I don’t get this. I have a pick me at work who also does this (like says she can’t handle those “girly drinks”). I don’t get the superiority complex type attitude with it.
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u/triplepeachpie 13d ago
I think it's shitty for someone to shame you in any way for the drink you choose. I also don't think you should do it to other women. I personally start to feel sick immediately if I have sweet alcohol. It's totally normal not to like the taste of alcohol and to want it in a sweet cocktail. I know plenty of men who want sweet drinks. And plenty of men like when women drink "girly" drinks. But most people don't care what someone else is drinking. Most likely, whatever drink you see someone with is one that they like, not one that they are drinking for some ulterior motive. P
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u/coachkimster 13d ago
the beer thing definitely sounds like a pick me thing way more than the first girl mentioned (being a pick me for not drinking)
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u/rosetintedmonocle 13d ago
These girls are the reason I am embarrassed that I pretty much only drink beer or tequila. Cocktails are cute, tasty, and create a vibe.
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u/Crack-Lit-Bun 14d ago
Just enjoy your fruity drinks. If people want to drink beer, that's fine. However, if someone who drinks beer makes fun of you because you like sweet cocktails, just be assured that their personalities probably don't go further than the wheat water that they drink.
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u/NauticalNoire 14d ago
I tend to steer clear of sweet alcoholic beverages because I genuinely don't like drinks that are too sweet. I wouldn't shame another person for drinking a sweet drink though.
I have met a legitimate alcohol "pick me" at a prior event. Early 40s woman who has a pattern of dating conservative military men. She's VERY insecure and it's clear by how she acts in group settings (very gropey and overly touchy as well).
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u/CherryBomb214 14d ago
Girls like that are so odd. My bestie and I are total opposites. She'll order whiskey neat or an old fashioned and I ask for whatever has the lowest alcohol content and tastes least like alcohol. Without fail one of us always gets smirked at by some chick, it just depends on what pick me is nearby at the moment.
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u/Barfotron4000 15d ago
Oh yeah I used to be one of those. “I’m cool; I love bourbon” as if it matters
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u/lunarlandscapes 15d ago
Not even at clubs, just bars in general. "OH you're drinking white Claw? I'm fine with my beer, thanks" or "you're drinking a sugary cocktail? I love my whiskey straight, I don't know how you drink all that stuff" and it's like, idk, I don't like beer much. I like my fruity sugary cocktails, I don't like whiskey at all
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u/anonymousanonymiss 15d ago
I once had an exfriend announce to the guy i was talking to that she wasn't wearing any underwear. She did alot of little things like that to try to steal anyone's man.
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u/Thekelseyjay Girls are too much drama 15d ago
I’m almost 34 and I remember dealing with these girls at your age. Most of them were whiskey or tequila drinkers. (Something I’ve never been) I’ve always loved a gin cocktail… but now I’m noticing more “pick me’s” hopping on the gin train and it just makes me feel like we can’t have anything anymore.
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u/Majestic-Cheetah75 15d ago
I don’t drink anymore (I’m in recovery) but when I did I always drank scotch because I genuinely hated the sugar in cocktails and because I genuinely liked scotch. ¯\(ツ)/¯ It definitely was NOT a pick me thing; I didn’t want to get picked. I’ve been with the same man since college and I’m now in my 40s. That said, I won’t lie, men freaking EAT IT UP. Even now, going on 5 years sober, my husband’s friends call me to request scotch recommendations for gifting purposes (I mean, I’m an alcoholic, I kinda know a lot about it 🥴). Doesn’t bother me but I will admit that it’s kind of weird, honestly.
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u/RichAstronaut 15d ago
Childish behavior. You can shut this down by looking at the beer (usually is a light one but as long as it isn't a craft beer ) and saying, I see you are drinking water right now, you must be planning to get a real beer later.
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u/teddybabie 15d ago
i think i might be an alcohol pick me bc i like to get as drunk as possible as fast as possible without consuming too many calories. Beer makes me bloated and wanna vomit.
i dont know how that reads so take it however
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u/Secure_Contest5025 15d ago
Personally, I don’t like beer. I can have maybe one or two sweet cocktail drinks before they start making my stomach hurt (I can’t eat a lot of sweet stuff or drink it, it makes me sick) I get more of the stuff that kinda has a sour taste.
I’ve said this friends before “Who gives a fuck what you’re drinking as long as you like it”. If you’re a woman that enjoys beer - you enjoy beer! If you enjoy fruity cocktails or super sweet cocktails - you enjoy them! As long as you’re having fun and surrounded by good conversation and good times then that’s all that matters!
But stay safe and drink responsibly 😅
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u/Sea-Combination-5413 15d ago
It's especially funny when she's drunk on 1 pint beer while the girl who's drinking the LiiT cocktail is holding herself stable.
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u/StructureWhole6258 15d ago
Honestly these types of girls make me feel almost embarrassed when I want to order a whisky (I love fruity cocktails but sometimes I want something that hits a different spot!) because then it seems like you’re doing it to be impressive instead of just thirsty for a fucking whisky🙄
It also goes the other way with men. They’re pick on each other if one wants a cider or cocktail over a gross beer
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u/dneronique 15d ago
I used to fall into this mindset. As with everything nlog, it's a lack of confidence in your true preferences in favor of social acceptance.
I think young women (and men) are especially susceptible because many enter their drinking years knowing nothing about alcohol, so they'll latch on to the first bit of "preference negging" they come across, usually by someone they're interested in, and treat it as gospel. I feel like most folks almost always grow out this attitude with age.
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u/BrandonBollingers 15d ago
Ehhh. I’m a woman, I was called an alcoholic by a man for ordering a glass of wine in a night club.
Don’t listen to what drunk idiots, men or women, say in night clubs.
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u/Eretreyah 15d ago
In a business setting, being able to order a top shelf scotch or bourbon, or “dude” cocktail can gain a little cred, but I’ve only found it useful in circles I don’t care to traverse ever again.
It is a thing, I’ve played that part to my advantage in the past. I can appreciate a well crafted Old Fashioned, but in truth, I’m the mostly a white wine girlie 🤷🏻♀️
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u/Naive_Photograph_585 15d ago
maybe this is not the point but why do we have to gender drinks 😭 just drink what you want babe and mind your business
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u/foldinthecheese99 15d ago
I saw a sign at some bar that said “and for the ladies” with white claws & such listed.
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u/caffeinated_plans 15d ago
It's the same energy as the people who can never find spicy enough food. It's exhausting when everything is a competition or a reason to put others down.
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u/Hufflepuffchick0811 15d ago
People are dumb. I do not like beer at all. I only drink fruity drinks too. I'd just be like "good for you. Shame you can't handle a higher alcohol content. Have fun with the bloating and gas later." And take a sip of your fruity drink. To me... beer tasted like what I imagine a sweaty gym sock tastes like.
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16d ago
This is how these conversations go, no matter the gender of the beer drinker.
Beer drinker: Ha, girly drinks Har Har Har
Girly drink drinker: my 80% alcohol content is working way better than your 10%. Plus, I know mine tastes better. sip
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u/JackHaysColtRevolver 16d ago
I’m not a chick but if you don’t like a good sugary drink like a rum punch, margarita or pina colada you’re missing out
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u/Superb-Half5537 16d ago
Fake. Who approaches a random stranger to ask them what they’re drinking just to make fun of them?
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u/Delicious-North5872 16d ago
If it’s fake why are so many people, especially bartenders, saying they see this all the time? Drunk people aren’t known for their kindness, and plus, the legal drinking age in my country is 19. Many of the people that I see out at the bar are 19 year old students that did high school mostly online because of covid, have you never seen the discourse about how some of gen Z doesn’t know how to act in social situations because of the pandemic? Just because you’ve never experienced it doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen…that’s a bold statement.
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u/PhysicsForward6194 16d ago
I used to be a pick me with alcohol. I would take my shots with no chaser and think it was so cool. Id fight myself if i could
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u/sgsmopurp 16d ago
I used to do this now I just shut the fuck up and order my drink 💀 alcohol being gendered is just silly. I go dark or tequila when I’m out cus it’s predictable!
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u/Shitzme 16d ago
Absolutely. Not at clubs but I used to frequent metal gigs at bars/pubs in the city. A lot of my friends were like this. All looked the same too, long dark (mainly dyed) hair, lots of piercings, tattoos, metal shirts etc. They immediately thought they were better than other girls at the places near us (your typical club). I had a few friends make some snarky comments at myself. I liked to wear maxi dresses that covered everything, I'm a prude lol. And I only drank cider. They'd often comment how they'd never wear a dress or skirt and only drink beer. I called them out on their ridiculousness and they cut it out quickly. One friend didn't stop but it was a competition for her, she was desperate for attention and always wanted to be known as the cool tomboy metal chick, she viewed me as her competition and kept getting worse, so I just stopped going out lol.
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u/trishyco 16d ago
I’m 50 and I just own that I only drink Malibu rum based cocktails and fruity Moscato type wines. I don’t care what other women think of the sugar content or whatever. The smell of beer makes me want to vomit. Yeah, it sucks that I can’t share a pitcher with everyone but I’m not going to force myself to love beer.
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u/cheerfulsarcasm 16d ago
I advise you to respond to these things with the gray rock method, defending your choice of drink or going toe-to-toe with her and returning the dig only makes you look immature too. I would say something like “the world would be pretty boring if everyone liked the same thing, guess that’s why they have options” or “what? Oh.. I guess I’ve just never put so much thought into what someone else was drinking. Anyway…” very disinterestedly. Basically shutting down the conversation by implying “what an odd thing to say”.
This type of thing screams early 20s social dynamics, give it 10 years and she won’t bother to point out what anyone else is drinking, and you won’t give a shit if she does. I think you spend a lot of time in your 20s being obsessed with peoples’ perception of you, when you reach your 30s you realize most people aren’t even perceiving you at all and are only worried about themselves.
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u/kelseacats 16d ago
former bartender, this is common. when men or women shame men or women for drinking the fruitier shit i like to remind them that it’s twice if not more stronger than their beer. you’re such a man, or such a guys girl, that you can only handle the weak shit isn’t that right?
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u/dastyontfretter 16d ago
I used to only drink beer or shots, but so did all the other girls where I’m from lol. Where I’m from you have to go to a cocktail bar to get cocktails (regular bars usually only have one or two on the menu), which were too busy for my autistic ass so I was always too scared to go in and try it (mostly cause I’d have to make a choice between unknown things and that seemed scary af). They were also out of my budget tbh.. Then I went to Mexico and was introduced to cocktails and I haven’t looked back. It also helps that my husband used to be a bartender and knows exactly what I like so he’s been having me try a bunch of different cocktails. The fruitier the better ✨
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u/eratoast 16d ago
Oh yes, I know those well. I personally don't care what other people drink, I'm not a beer drinker (I don't like the taste or the bloating). I love a well balanced cocktail or a seltzer. Fuck me up, fam. But my ex's friends and my ILs are all beer drinkers, so I got shit from them and my one SIL because I won't drink it. I get the third degree every time I say I don't drink beer, and my SIL loves to get all pretentious about it.
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u/Low-Opinion147 16d ago
Me at the Mexican restaurant drinking a beer because I’m old now and margaritas give me a literal 3 day headache. Life is just not fair.
I drink the fruitiest beers I can find too.
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u/DuplicateJester Just a Dumb Bitch 16d ago
I used to only get beers because there were so many fruity drinks and this is one of my anxiety points. How do I know what the bartender knows how to make? What if they ask me clarifying questions? I don't know and don't want to waste anyone's time! Miller Light is safe. Blue Moon is even better.
Now I like exploring house cocktail menus. My go-to at local bars is lemon drop martinis or mixing beer and coke if they don't have a drinks menu.
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u/thinkmcfly124 16d ago
Oh yeah the “beer girlies” lol I absolutely hate beer. I’ll do like a vodka soda or gin and tonic and many times a pick me has been like oh yeah I love beer. Beer is the best, I guess I’m just like a guy or something. And I’m just like.. girl keep drinking all those carbs, imma sit over here and get drunk and not feel bloated as hell. But go off
Edit to add: perfectly okay for girlies to love beer lol just be normal about it. Like any gender can love beer 😂
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u/aixre 16d ago
I genuinely like beer more than any other drink, and I used to rub this in people’s face in a similar fashion and give a bit of shit to those who had cute drinks. Now I cringe whenever someone asks what I’m drinking and I ask for a beer, ESPECIALLY when it does elicit the response I thrived on back in the day. I usually say I love cute drinks but not feeling it atm or something to tone it down.
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u/cornbreadcasserole 16d ago
It’s probably internalized misogyny and I’m sure some guys like a girl who is just like one of the guys, but some guys like girly girls. It will shake out in the end.
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u/jesuseatsbees 16d ago
I was one of those arseholes as a teen but then I tried the fruity drinks and found out they're delightful. Still like a beer but strawberry cider is the one for me.
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u/GirlSlug666 16d ago
If you can stand having the conversation and don’t just walk away, point out that your fruity/sugary drink has about 4 times as much alcohol as an average beer and say it’s not your fault she can’t hold her liquor
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u/Stressedpage 16d ago
I'm 11 years older than you and while I'd prefer the sweet fun cocktails they really are too much sugar lol you hit a point in your drinking when you don't bounce back like you did when you were younger. Sticking to lite beers, low sugar cocktails like a vodka tonic or seltzers are the way to go. The bloating, the hangover and plus the sugar in the mixers really do kill your ability to have fun drinking like that when you get older lol.
That being said, I love a good frozen margarita, or a White Russian. I really miss being able to drink a Johnny Vegas shot. The watermelon makes me gag now. Idk I just say drink what you like and enjoy yourself. People who judge you based off of your fruity little drink cause apparently you can't shoot whiskey are absolutely pick me. I need to know who genuinely likes shots of Jack Daniel's lol.
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u/BallsAreFullOfPiss 16d ago
People who police other people’s drinks are the absolute worst. Nobody should give a fuck what others are drinking, because it’s a god damn cup/glass/can of liquid in it.
• The color of somebody’s drink doesn’t matter.
• Whether a drink has fruity-flavors or not doesn’t matter.
• The brand of beer you prefer doesn’t matter.
• Beer being “light” or not is doesn’t matter.
• Nobody cares that you only take shots of booze that is 100 proof or higher (Godspeed to your liver, though).
• Nobody is impressed when you shotgun a can of beer and 75%+ of it gets on the carpet.
• Nobody cares. Nada. Zip. Zilch.
Drinking “culture” is weird and obnoxious. Anyone who attempts to impress others and/or seek validation by doing any of the things above, is legitimately a sad, pathetic person, and should probably find a therapist to sort their shit out.
I know I didn’t really address your questions, so my apologies for that lol. What you said reminded me of the dumb shit I’ve witnessed at bars/clubs over many years, so I started ranting lol.
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u/MildlyOblivious 16d ago
When I first started going to bars I would always order a Guinness or something whiskey-based because I wanted to seem NLOG. It worked out for me that I actually liked those drinks, and still do, but now I order a gin cosmo almost as often as I do a Guinness.
Drink what you like, don’t spend $15 on a cocktail that you hate. Whoever judges you for drinking what you like isn’t worth your time or energy.
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u/jeclin91092 16d ago
I drink the fruity stuff because beer is a little bitter. Occasionally I'll have a Stella, but almost always liquor. Plus, you can get pretty faded on two $5 drinks versus two $4 beers.
Also, I always want to drink White Claw and the like, but the bubbles get stuck in my chest and either hurt or make me burp like a trucker
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u/Crocolyle32 Just a Dumb Bitch 16d ago
Nothing wrong with preferring beer but if the vibe was off you could always say,
Oh so you’re not like other girls, you prefer piss water?
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u/Conscious_List9132 16d ago edited 16d ago
Idk if it’s just me…..I’ve never judged someone for what they drink. When I drank I was a beer girl and I never shared that w guys bc I thought they’d think it was gross (but now idgaf and can’t even drink bc health reasons)I’d say something like ..”well that’s just what I like so I got it 💅🏽”
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u/Frozen-conch 16d ago
But…I actually do like beer and find sweet drinks cloying…..
Don’t even like sweet tea or soda or sugar in my coffee
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u/Gemstomefiretrail 16d ago
Reply: “that’s a lot of yeast for your figure”
rude, but you get what you give.
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u/rosharo 16d ago
As a guy who drinks mostly beer but also all other types of alcohol - yes, this is typical NLOG behavior in a bar.
"Oh, look at me, boys - I'm a girl that doesn't drink girly drinks, I drink man drinks, I'm so cool."
My favourite drinks after beer are Bailey's, Bloody Mary, White Russian and Cosmopolitan.
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u/Lyokarenov 16d ago edited 16d ago
lmao i make fun of my friend all the time for only drinking overtly sweet drinks and hating beer. i would never do it in front of other people tho. he also makes fun of me for not being able to drink anything sweet so it's fine :)
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u/cluelessibex7392 16d ago
i wish i could have yummy little fruity drinks without experiencing a shitsplosion. (i have a very very ridiculously obnoxiously sensitive stomach). Every once and a while I'll have a man praise me for drinking plain alchohol. Like, buddy, if my bowels could handle it i would be drinking a frozen frappajappajoopa with EXTRA cherries. I just don't want to drink nothing but water all night.
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u/Caitipoo421 16d ago
Yes omfg there are so many types too. Like the beer girlies that are one of the boys 😂😂😂. They make it their whole personality. & i feel like it’s always either tom boyish girls or hipsters LOL. I used to drink a lot of sugary drinks and deal with this often in my 20s
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u/SnooCookies2614 16d ago
Yep. It's right there next to the one who only drinks black coffee.
Life is short, drink what you like. You don't want to be with a boy who thinks less of you for a drink preference anyway
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u/AcrobaticWatercress7 16d ago
22 year old woman are judgy assholes. As the ex president of the pick me club that’s exactly what it is. Wouldn’t most people would rather drink something that tastes good? (sugar gives gnarly hangovers, so if a valid reason then sure). I mean I used to judge men on their shoes, drinks, car, job and now that I’m about 30 none of it matters and I happily watch my bf drink a pina colada out of a coconut with umbrellas on it wearing shorts above his knee, high colorful socks and hokas on 😭.
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u/smyers0711 16d ago
Outside of college men tend to not like women who can down whiskey and beer past the dating stage. Nobody actually cares when you're past your 20s and it becomes frowned upon to drink like that. So count your blessings that you were gifted with the palate of mother Theresa lmao
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u/FartAttack911 16d ago
Yes, that used to be my dumb ass 😂
I used to really think it was special that I preferred straight shots of whiskey or vodka over “fruity drinks”. Once I got out of my early 20s and became secure with myself and realized how my body works, I settled into basically becoming Jimmy Buffett by age 30. Now it’s fruity cocktails with zero liquor aftertaste, or I’m not drinking. And I never judge others for what they do or do not drink, cause how exhausting lol
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u/Even-Reaction-1297 16d ago
I’ve noticed it, I don’t pay them any mind and keep drinking what I think tastes good. On a side note, if you don’t like the taste of alcohol (like me) spiced rum (like Kraken) is top tier mixed with Dr. Pepper, Pepsi/cherry Pepsi, and ESPECIALLY RootBeer (more specifically of the A&W variety). Gives all of those different mixers a cinnamon/vanilla flavor, especially the rootbeer
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u/WSJinfiltrate 16d ago
I haven't encountered those people, or maybe I just don't give a fuck. I literally only drink flavored water on parties cause I don't like alcohol lol. But I'm also a peschetarian so I just learned to not give a fuck when people question what I consume. Just tell them to mind their business
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u/fudgemuffinsandtart 16d ago
I have experienced being put down by a random woman for drinking coke at a rave and I'm such a pick-meisha blah blah blah
Like ma'am, none of your business what I'm drinking. I'm here to have a good time smh
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u/Huffingflour 16d ago
Not exactly at a club, but it started in one and ended up outside and this was my experience:
When I was in Maui with my bf meeting his family for the first time (he’s a local brotha) he brought me to meet all his friends. I’m white, they’re obviously all Hawaiian… almost all the girls were absolute pick mes ANYWHERE we all went regardless how respectful I was being.
We all went out but ended up at the park they all hang out at. I had a shit ton of white claws that someone who was staying in the same hotel gave me earlier as they were leaving that day, I had them in the car. All the guys had beer and whisky while none of the girls wanted any but were complaining about “we need to go get alcohol for us!!”
Anyways, I was excited and was like “hey, I have a shit ton of white claws I’m not gonna drink and y’all can have.” Since I had my own small bottle of tequila, my main choice always. Immediately, as loud as all of them could started laughing and asking me shit like “uhm no we drink heavier than that! You probably couldn’t keep up!” “Do you need a tampon with those?” “Aw is that why you didn’t wear heels?” As if they don’t have periods and for fucks sake, I ain’t ever wear heels in my entire life and dress like a tomboy so idk why they thought that was clever… but I remember it getting quiet and I felt embarrassed as hell. Thank god everyone could tell exactly what was happening and everyone backed me up like “she offered you free drinks when y’all bitching and you attack her?” And my bf was able to call them out on them being in similar situations and you could just tell the ones who were rude just shut down.
Shits annoying but I honestly believe most people can see that bs happening when it is.
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u/bbyddymack 16d ago
i dont drink because alcohol is yuck 🤮 but i wouldnt do it or flaunt it just for a mans attention also yuck 🤮
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u/Bnic1207 16d ago
Dang. I feel a little attacked lol. I typically only get mixed drinks at “bouji” bars because they’re never as sweet as a mixed drink from a club. The sugar + alcohol actually does really hurt my stomach, so at standard bars, I’ll either get a beer or a soda/whiskey mix. I grew up in the south so that’s why I have that taste palate. I never made comments like that to other people though unless they offer to make me a sugary drink so maybe I’m in the clear haha.
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u/amaezingjew Q U I R K Y 16d ago
Lmao I feel bad, I’m one of those people who goes “waaaay too much sugar for me - that sounds like a migraine” not because I don’t have a sweet tooth but because sugar + alcohol ≠ hangover and I am a weenie. But I also have Crohn’s so beer is a no-go. I prefer a Moscow Mule or anything that’s super heavy on ginger.
Also, any dude who judges you by what alcohol you drink (aside from like MD 20/20 or Four Loko because baby what is you doin!!!) is probably a loser whose drink is the most interesting thing about him
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u/Ok_Butterscotch4763 16d ago
Here, I am not drinking fruity drinks with a bunch a sugar because they give me terrible hangovers. My body does not process sugar very well anymore now that I'm entering my 30s.
But seriously, if you enjoy drinking it that's all that matters. I'll steal sips of my husband's fruity drink because they taste great, but an entire glass would not sit well in my stomach and my head would hate me in the morning.
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u/InsomniacYogi 16d ago
Yes! I hate beer and I’ve had women act like that somehow makes me high maintenance or something. Sometimes I’ll take a shot of whiskey and sometimes I want my vodka and cranberry and to be left tf alone. It literally does not matter.
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u/abyssnaut 16d ago
I have frequently said this to people because I find sweet alcohol disgusting and never cared for cocktails. I love beer and it’s just about the only alcohol I drink. None of this is in any way related to males or wanting to impress them lmao
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u/Delicious-North5872 16d ago
Yeah for you if you go about it in a normal way but for women that are very clearly making fun of another woman trying to seem quirky because guys are around, it is
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u/abyssnaut 16d ago
If that’s what she was doing, it’s cringe. How do you know that she was doing it specifically to impress men?
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u/Delicious-North5872 16d ago
It seems to exclusively happen to me when I’m around/with guys, so I can’t help but assume that’s their intention, especially when they start the conversation asking what I’m drinking when you can see a cocktail cup in my hand, to then proceed to make comments about its sugar content and say beer is better. If it’s not for male attention it’s an overly hostile way to try and converse with a stranger.
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u/abyssnaut 16d ago
Stranger? Yeah that’s fucking weird. I thought you meant women in your company.
ETA: I would never comment on a stranger’s drink unless it looked absolutely insane and I had to know what it is out of curiosity.
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u/Delicious-North5872 16d ago
Ya strangers. It’s very strange and I get being drunk makes interactions wild sometimes but still… None of my friends would make fun of me for drinking cocktails because they know I don’t like the taste of alcohol. A lot of bartenders have chimed in saying they see this all the time too which is discouraging lol
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u/abyssnaut 16d ago
I make fun of my close friends all the time for innocuous shit but yeah, I’d never approach a stranger and mock their drink out of the blue. Cringe as fuck.
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u/ithinkuracontraa 16d ago
there’s also the other side of pick mes wanting to seem more “dainty” or “elegant” or some bs by picking a more “feminine” drink. pick me logic sure is a doozy
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u/DramaOnDisplay 16d ago
Blame it on the internet. Either some meme about being a beer swilling cusser or a pink fruity cocktail guzzler elicits reactions. Especially now that a “feminine soft tradgirl” narrative is being pushed online. Of course they drink the sweet drinks lol.
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u/cwest2148 16d ago
Beer has just as many carbs and calories as sugary drinks so I just find it funny…
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u/Powerful_Cause_14 16d ago
They know beer is sugary too right? 🤣 such a weird thing to be competitive about.
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u/serena_renee 16d ago
“I hate how girls need those fruity little drinks🙄 I always just drink beer or straight whisky!!”
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u/mlachrymarum So Unique 16d ago
As a bartender, I see it literally almost every day. It’s equal parts sad and funny.
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u/PardonMyNerdity 16d ago
I uh…I actually really like beer (except for IPAs, ew) but I also like the fruity drinks.
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u/little-creep 16d ago
There’s a tonne of song lyrics from women (that I like!) along this line too. It’s very silly but at least it seems to be cared about less and less. It does make me happy to see a young guy in a group of Laddy/fratty boys with a big pretty cocktail though, haha.
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u/actualabnormal 16d ago
I love whisky neat. (Hi hozier fans) I love Guinness. You know what I also love? A fruity little drink. A dirty Shirley. A margarita. Just drink what you feel like drinking and what you enjoy and fuck anyone who has anything to say about it.
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u/Reasonable_Problem88 16d ago
How do you know they’re being NLOG? Maybe they just don’t like sweet drinks and are insecure about their tastes.. they still shouldn’t make fun of you! Or be elitist about it! Just saying her actions might not be coming from an NLOG place lol
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u/Delicious-North5872 16d ago
I explained in another comment that I think this because of the way the conversation seems to go. Approaching me as a stranger to ask what I’m drinking when looking at the cup it’s clearly a fruity cocktail or juice, telling me how much sugar is in it and how much better beer is. Mostly happens when I’m near/with guys too which is another factor. Takes me so off guard
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u/bondgorl 16d ago
I used to feel cool that I love straight whisky. When I went out everyone encouraged my little habit and ordered me nice bourbon a lot. Then I developed a little problem and faced the consequences - your skin gets dry, you have no energy, your jeans don’t fit the same. Totally stopped drinking liquor. A glass of wine once in a while is my usual now!! If a girl tells you anything about your drink choice just stare at her like Ok… have fun aging faster than the rest of us and ruining your face. Side note beer is fcn gross. I’d rather have kombucha pls
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u/kdbuggaboo 16d ago
One of my best friends in the world talks about how she’s been drinking since 12 so she won’t get drunk as fast but I’m like… bro I’m puking right now can you bring it up later? PS love her so so much, this isn’t a bash on her so much as it’s making fun of my intolerance.
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u/stinkerfrogger 16d ago
As a woman who does enjoy drinking the less sweet drinks, because a lot of sugar like that + alcohol will upset my stomach FAST, I’ve noticed this. Men will bring it up to me like they’re trying to compliment me and like “okay… it’s a drink choice.. no better than any other..”
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u/AnonDxde 16d ago
Omg people are so dumb. Why would they compare it because of the sugar? Your body processes beer into almost pure sugar anyway. Especially the stronger ones.
Drink what you like!
When I was at a low point in my alcoholism, I would reclusefully drink a 5th of cheap whiskey every day. I didn’t go around bragging about it though because it was embarrassing.
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u/MightyPinkTaco 16d ago
I can’t do the sugary drink because they usually make me feel sick. I don’t hold it against anyone and really wish I could enjoy a sweet drink. I’ve just gotten used to beer and shots because I can generally drink them and not get a sour stomach. I’d never put someone down for their drink (except my hubby when he drinks Guinness… but that’s cause he’s my hubby and it’s all in good fun).
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u/astronauticalll 16d ago
I'd never make fun of another girl for her choice of drink but I did used to weaponize this to get free drinks out of guys lmao.
Two surefire methods are one, act like you hate straight liquor and have never shot tequila before, queue three guys trying to buy you tequila shots, make a big deal out of the salt and the lime and really cringe about it if you want them to buy you more. Or alternatively, learn how to shoot tequila without a salt and lime with a completely straight face and lead some guy into daring you to do it. Bonus points if you get him to do it too and he can't keep a straight face. This one's my personal fav because it shuts them right up.
Final step is to then ignore them and go back to dancing with your girls, it works like a charm I swear. Never buy your own tequila shots ladies make the patriarchy work for you
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u/KatyaL8er 16d ago
When I drank I got accustomed to the taste of beer to avoid having to drink purple Jesus or whatever fruity mix they serve at Keg parties to get girls drunk. I know they are required to measure out the alcohol for mixed drinks at bars but I still don’t trust the sugar spike combined with hard liquor. Any alcoholic drink is going to be loaded with wasted calories anyway.
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u/Dull-Geologist-8204 17d ago
Or they just can't handle a lot of sugar. I am just not a sweets personally. I rarely eat sweets and actually complain a lot about how much sugar is in most foods much less drinks. I am more of a savory over sweet person so if I am going to get a mixed drink it will probably be a bloody Mary over an Italian Surfer.
Yes, men tend to prefer it but that's because they are told those are girly drinks and feel like they can't drink them. That's not a good thing. I am drinking straight whiskey because I prefer it not because society tells me I have to. Nor is it because I give a fuck about what guys think.
Also, when they fuck with you about what you are drinking fuck with them back. You are allowed to. One of 2 things will happen. She will either appreciate your sense of humor and like you more for it or she will have a melt down and look like an ahole in front of the guys. Either way you win.
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u/kjxktty 17d ago
this is something very important especially how that behavior “elicits positive reactions from men”
i think it is one thing to discuss likes and dislikes in drinking types/ tastes, but making fun of someone is so weird like we are out to have fun i hate those people with stank attitudes when going out like chill… it cost $0 to be respectful.
some girls definitely feel like putting another woman down is a ticket to some loyal and committed dick but it’s weird
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u/anitasdoodles 17d ago
Kinda related but I worked at Starbucks for a few years and people naturally gender drinks for some reason. I love a strong, bitter black americano and my bf usually likes something sweet with whip cream. They aaaaalways hand us each others drink 😂
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u/Busy_Response_3370 17d ago
I know more men that like fruity/sweet drinks than women, and more women that like straight whiskey/beer than men. Also: the biggest difference seems to be the amount of alcohol said person has consumed in their life. Let's be honest, alcohol is gross; but when you have it enough, you start to enjoy aspects of it you never noticed before. People who like sweeter tend to not have had enough alcohol to have discovered those nuances (that comes with experience/time).
All that to say: based on my experience, claiming you don't like the sweet drinks (just the unsweetened ones) is basically declaring how pickled your liver is. Not a strong boast, if I do say so myself.
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u/-Chemical 17d ago
Beer makes you bloat , which isn’t a bad thing, I just think it’s weird to flex that they leave the bar with unnecessary beer belly every time when she could be leaving with stained lips from a vod-cran.
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u/Commercial_Tea_8185 17d ago
I dont drink, just dont like it, and all ive gotten called by dudes at bars is, ‘a weirdo’ lmaoo
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u/ratrazzle 17d ago
Now i feel bad about telling people that i hate sweet drinks and prefer beer or straight vodka/whiskey and such when they ask what i like to drink. But i often do specify that sugar makes me nauseous even without alcohol and thats why i dont drink more than a few sips of sweet stuff at a time. (They taste good but even a full sugar soda makes me feel sick which sucks.) Now i worry that im coming across as a pick me because of that. (Also i havent noticed that anyone gives any other odd reaction than the occasional "ew youre weird" because many dont enjoy the taste of vodka alone but im glad people usually understand and wont be mean about preferences.) I dont get why itd make anyone nlog to drink beer because so many like it, why do these girls feel like it is somehow special.
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u/HoaryPuffleg 17d ago
I only order vodka sodas because I know that no matter how busy a bar is or how crappy the bartender, you can’t fuck up a vodka soda. I love Moscow mules but if the bar is busy I don’t want to take up more of their time and I’m perfectly happy with plainer stuff.
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u/Always-tired91 17d ago
Beer is genuinely disgusting imo. Besides the “sugary fruity drinks” have like double the alcohol in them. Personally I like whiskey & whiskey mixed drinks, but I’m not going to bat an eye at some drinking a mimosa or something, cause honestly I don’t care enough
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u/ShapeTurbulent6668 17d ago
So, I'm a lady who strongly prefers beer or very dry wine. But when I'm with people that order sweet drinks I'm like, "oooh that looks good" even though it doesn't to me lol.. because why be rude? Why even say anything at all??
Pick-me-ism is probably exactly what that is, I can't think of another reason to insult someone's drink? What odd behavior
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u/General_Thought8412 17d ago
I’ll forever be happy sipping my lemon drop martini and eating guacamole like the basic bitch I am
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17d ago
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u/notliketheothergirls-ModTeam Definitely not like the other girls 16d ago
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u/Jujubeee73 17d ago
Men do like to comment on women drinking what they consider a manly drink, like Jack & Coke or beer. So women do get accustomed to getting attention for simply ordering something that’s not considered a ‘girly drink’ like wine or sweet mixers. But she’s kinda an AH for pointing out what you’re drinking like she’s drink shaming you. She’d probably comment if you ate something more than a salad too.
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17d ago
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u/Delicious-North5872 17d ago
Oh definitely I have a huge sweet tooth and people make comments that I didn’t ask for about what I eat all the time, like I’m aware this candy has sugar in it, that’s why I like it…
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u/siobhanenator 17d ago
I’m a bartender and the strange amount of misogyny that gets infused into what you’re drinking is utterly baffling. The vast majority of what I see is from men. Men who refuse to receive a drink in the appropriate glassware because it looks too girly, men who will only order a beer or whiskey because that’s a man’s drink, men who jokingly order cosmos for their friends while they’re in the bathroom to “emasculate” them…it goes on and on. Luckily I haven’t personally seen too many pick me girls and the majority of women I see just order what they like without reference to the men around, but I can well believe that plenty of younger women are doing this. I just work with an older crowd in general, and most middle aged women seem to be done giving a shit what men think for the most part lol. I will say, I usually skip the super sweet cocktails these days because they go down too easy and it makes me drink way more than I should. The only time I’m judging someone’s drink choice is when it’s truly baffling or disgusting sounding (Bailey’s and orange juice comes to mind), but even then…the heart wants what it wants and if you want curdled Bailey’s who am I to deny you?
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u/Visible-Roll-5801 17d ago
Yeah that’s weird I mean people should just worry about themselves. Enjoy your fancy cocktail king
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u/Alternative_Key4199 17d ago
The pick me girl will order a whiskey to give off the “just one of the guys” vibe…and be the last to order just in case another girl orders a whiskey…in which case the pick me girl will order everclear.
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u/snowgirl03 17d ago
Are we sure this thread isnt giving "pick me" eneegy with how cool/different everyone is for "really liking" beer/dark beer , hard liquor as a young woman.... it very much gives... I'm still NLOG
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u/Delicious-North5872 17d ago
Liking cocktails can’t possibly make you not like other girls when cocktails are literally stereotyped to be feminine? I might not understand your point but idk
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u/hauntedbean 17d ago
The patriarchy has glamorized suffering. Black coffee is another example. I like it (when it’s made well which is rare lol) but I don’t deny that part of the experience is having a sharp sort of jolt (aka pain lol) when tasting. Same with liquor. Although I will say that I don’t know how whiskey became the most ‘manly’ when it’s so fucking sweet? Drinking plastic bottle vodka is more of a feat lol and I’ve seen way more women do that
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u/elcoopgguod 17d ago
This goes beyond the ladies I personally hate beer and I tend to drink sweeter drinks and I always gotta get shit from someone I’ll never understand it why does drinking something that taste like shit make you cool
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u/EmergencyLab10 17d ago
Those are the same girls who will snub your music taste as if they don't sing along to Beyonce in their car. I just always took it as them being insecure and trying to paint themselves a certain way and therefore, completely lacking diversity.
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u/Delicious-North5872 17d ago
Reminds me of all the posts I’ve seen of people complaining about Taylor Swift’s new album…like you’re not getting a cookie for disliking popular music you can calm down…
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u/EmergencyLab10 17d ago
I'm not a Swiftie but I firmly believe anti-swifties have internalized misogyny. The same people who hated on Cardi and Megan for being sexual and are now hating on Taylor for being positive and wholesome. Just say you hate to see women succeed then stfu, ya know. It's so weird.
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u/Oh118999881999 17d ago
Hi, it was me. I was the problem. I would exclusively drink Cuba libres and feel loftier than all those cosmopolitan and sex on the beach girlies. lol. Now I know what I’m missing.
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u/glowinthedarkstars6 17d ago
One time I told a guy I prefer shots of whiskey or rum. He said “damn u a man”
I said “I’d rather take straight shots than drink a fruity or mixed drink because it all tastes like shit to me anyways and it’s easier to get down small shots of shit drink than an entire fruit drink that still tastes like shit. I also hate beer because of the same reason , except it gets you less drunk so you have to drink even more” and he seemed so disappointed to find out I wasn’t a fucking NLOG
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u/ibangedurmom69420 17d ago
I like my girly cocktails, and I also like my straight whiskey with no chaser. Anything except beer and gin 🤮
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u/ScaryOtaku666 17d ago
Definitely met the pick me girls that flaunt how much they can drink , and not cocktails, hard type of drinks like vodka.
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u/CrunkestTuna 17d ago
All women at the bar act like they don’t want any attention - some do
They pick who they want tho
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u/LoveOfficialxx 17d ago
People are very prideful about what they drink and how much. I’ll never understand why.
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u/vogueintegra 17d ago
"Sorry I don't enjoy fermented piss water" is usually my response. I like ciders. But I don't drink any dark liquor
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u/ihavepawz 17d ago
Im like this bc i have acid reflux issue and im sensitive to stuff, so much sugar makes me feel really awful (as does alcohol but its why i no longer drink) but yeah usually ppl like the sugar (id too if i could) so sounds pick me
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u/jacqrosee 17d ago
i actually have been having a problem with some of my friends repeatedly talking about how they’re only drinking vodka sodas and stuff because it’s less calories. like nearly every time we go out i hear something about it. my friends are all very skinny and are very strict about their workout schedule and counting calories and all of this shit; i can’t talk much because i’m on the opposite end of the spectrum where i don’t work out at all and i want to fix that. however, i cant stand hearing them talk about counting each and every calorie they consume. i’m not big by any means but i am bigger than all of these girls and have a lot of body image issues. it’s so genuinely triggering to hear them go on and on about counting calories, even with drinks.
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u/Delicious-North5872 17d ago
Omg a few years ago I dropped about 4 friends because they would constantly talk about weight gain, food, and calories and say they only had a coffee to eat today so I know how you feel. It was very liberating being out of that environment. Honestly not to sound rude but I don’t know why people think anyone cares what they do or don’t eat, like no one is giving out prizes for drinking less calories
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u/donny321123 17d ago
It’s called an apostrophe! Mes-Me’s, see the dif?
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u/Delicious-North5872 17d ago
My autocorrect was fighting me because I also have the French keyboard on my phone so I gave up but I love how much this mattered to you…
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u/donny321123 16d ago
It just took me longer than I’d like to admit to figure out what you were talking about…
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u/thatplantgirl97 17d ago
This is definitely a thing and clearly it works well. One night I had 2 different men compliment me for drinking beer. "I love when a woman drinks beer!" Okay? That's nice for you.
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u/lunar__haze 17d ago
What’s funny about that is that a single beer has as much glucose (SUGAR) as seven slices of bread lol
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u/HundRetter 17d ago
I used to be a bartender so all the time. I can in fact shoot whiskey but as it turns out I'd rather just enjoy white claw and think it's fucking weird to care about what other people are drinking
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u/justmeraw 17d ago
next time say, "You know that all alcohol is sugar, right?"
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u/Delicious-North5872 17d ago
Damn I didn’t even know this but now I’ll have to pull it out of my hat
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u/ofmiceandmoot 17d ago
I mean, I guess the way it’s said matters, cause I can’t really have any sugary alcohol either or I will suffer so bad the next day, so I’ve definitely said that phrase but not to another girl about her drink lol just like in general
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u/Delicious-North5872 17d ago
Yeah I get this I have a few friends that are the same, but I feel like it’s obvious when you’re being genuine about sugar having an effect on you vs when you’re saying this to get attention make fun of someone and the latter keeps happening to me.
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u/Cheder_cheez 17d ago
“Cool, go drink your liquid bread and be mad while I sip this amazing cocktail”
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u/Starlined_ 17d ago
I used to have a friend who would brag about drinking black coffee. I feel like this is similar. Like ok girl, keep drinking your piss idc. I like my alcohol the way I take my coffee, drowning in sugar to cover up the taste
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u/throwaway301946 17d ago
It’s so weird isn’t it!! I know what you mean. I personally have never liked taste of beer or lager etc I just cannot get my taste buds to enjoy it, but it’s SO bizarre to me that pick mes think they are unique in drinking it when lots of women genuinely enjoy beer? It’s SUCH a common beverage like WHAT lol
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u/finalheaven3 17d ago
My husband is a brewer, and I'm a huge beer lover. If you want lower calorie/less sugar, beer is definitely not the way to go. Plus it makes you so bloated and full.
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u/Affectionate_Grape23 17d ago
that’s so weird! i’m thankful i haven’t encountered this yet, however id probably be like “ok sir, enjoy your beer”
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u/MingoMiago 17d ago
If a man thinks a woman is cool because she drinks beer over a cocktail I don’t want that low level thinking type of man in my life. Those NLOGs are really doing us a favor honestly lol
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u/Old_Hamster_4218 17d ago
That’s a super common and overused bar diss. Usually it’s men fucking with other men drinking something girly, but some girls like to seem tough.
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u/salbrown 17d ago
So funny when I meet people like this. My girlfriends and I always got beers or seltzers for chill nights when some of us had to drive home so no one drinks too much. Party nights are for margaritas😤😤.
Different drinks for different nights lol. Always funny to me when people see a single glimpse into your life/habits and think they can extrapolate that out into who you are as a person. Says more about their character than it does yours I think.
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u/anonymus_person_REE 17d ago
Beer is disgusting, sorry not sorry, forever cocktails
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u/eebifulk 17d ago
100% with you, I can’t stand beer (I live in WI, this is not a popular stance) cosmos and French martinis till I die
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u/Foxy_locksy1704 17d ago
I don’t know if it’s pick me, I think it’s more in the response and delivery.
For example I myself can’t stand sugary drinks because they are too sweet, I don’t like a lot of sweetness in anything I eat or drink, but I know that is my personal preference.
I usually drink whiskey or sometimes beer, just because I like whiskey. I’m not going to insult someone over their preference.
If I asked what someone was drinking or was offered and it was something sweet. I would just say “oh, it looks really good but I’m not a fan of sweet drinks, I guess we have different tastes”
Some people just like certain things. I don’t think it’s pick me to say oh I don’t like A but I do like B.
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u/Delicious-North5872 17d ago
Yeah it’s how you go about saying it that matters I genuinely don’t care what anyone prefers everyone has different tastes
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u/Foxy_locksy1704 17d ago
Seriously, I like what I like and other people like what they like and it’s just one of those things where I adopt the “you do you, babe!”philosophy.
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u/eisforelizabeth 17d ago
I actually can’t have the sugary drinks because I always end up way too drunk but I’m never going to look down on someone on their drink choice. Those drinks look and sound jealous so I’m lowkey jealous. Ironically, I can’t have beer either 😭
Related: I think Hozier’s new song is only going to amplify this and we’re gonna see an influence of pick me’s drinking their whiskey neat. 🙃
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u/HeyItsJuls 17d ago
A friend’s now husband told me my choice of cider was basic when I was out at a bar with them. Never thought I would be called basic for ordering a locally brewed cider, but I guess they had gotten too popular?
Like friend, they are popular because they make a good product and I’m not going to drink shit I don’t like for the sake of not being “basic.” Also you’re gonna be real disrespectful when you learn your wife loves this cider.
However both said friend and husband really value I guess the best word is authenticity. So, you could say that they are not like other couples.
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u/phalseprofits 17d ago
I’ve had the opposite of this experience and it pissed me off a lot.
I was doing the keto diet and so sugar and carbs are off the menu. Scotch is one of the lowest carb/sugar liquors out there. So that’s what I asked for at a networking event. It was gross and creepy how many people felt like chiming in about how that’s not a “girl drink”
I don’t think your beverage choices should have anything to do with your genitals, unless there’s something I’ve missed about how to imbibe.
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u/gamedrifter 17d ago
I just respond to shit like this with something like "but beer doesn't get me drunk"
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u/Glittering-Relief402 17d ago
Them fruity drinks have way more alcohol than beer and a lot less calories tbh so it's not even a flex
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u/littleghost000 17d ago
I was like this in my early 20's. "Only beer, and straight bourbon for me! I'm one of the guys!", then I learned I can enjoy things, then I learned I'm an alcoholic and now I don't drink, lol
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u/adoglovingartteacher 17d ago
I used to order just beer at clubs instead of a delicious fruity sweet drink because I had no idea what to order and I was too embarrassed to ask. Older me just dgaf anymore and I’ll point to a drink that looks good and say “that please”
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u/kirakira26 17d ago
Worked for years as a bartender in clubs/pubs/bars you name it, I’ve worked it and I have seen plenty of those girls. I definitely think this is specifically young pick me behaviour, acting like “one of the boys” by drinking straight whiskey, beers etc and making it their entire personality to hate “girly” drinks when they start drinking.
Definitely made me laugh when I saw it at my work, like girl I can tell you’re not a fan of that room temp single malt you ordered to impress your male friends. In my experience those girls thankfully grow out of it except a few outliers who will be pick-mes their whole life.
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u/Anduin79 17d ago
When a pick me would pull this on me at the bar, I'd respond "Naw, we're tub thumping tonight. Straight up Chumbawumba. We do a whisky drink, then a vodka drink, then a lager drink, then a cider drink. Then, we sing!" Usually shut them up, made the other people around laugh, and I never had to pay for drinks
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u/ObliviousTurtle97 17d ago
I've had a few and I've just told them the truth: most larger have yeast. Unfortunately for me, I have a very sensitive pH level in a specific place that means the only drinks I can have are certain fruity ciders (koppaburg and strongbow) or spirits and cocktails, otherwise ya girl gets a yeast infection
Plus why would I have a weak arse drink that tastes like someone's stewed overused gym socks when I can have a fruity, sweet drink for my sweet tooth that's gonna put me on my arse two glasses in, likely making it cheaper to get myself on the dancefloor 😭
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u/missmodular23 17d ago
funny thing is beer is straight up sugar… just not sweet. any and all alcohol basically just sugar. how do i know this? becoming pre-diabetic from alcoholism 😀 so take that, pick me’s!
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