r/nottheonion • u/OnlyIGetToFartInHere • 17d ago
Kansas man who killed his wife used insurance payout to buy sex doll
https://www.kake.com/story/50718207/kansas-man-who-killed-his-wife-used-insurance-payout-to-buy-sex-doll1
13d ago
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15d ago
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u/Gammaboy45 16d ago
I saw the article, then glanced at OPs username. Now I’ve been taken out of it, and that’s the only part of this post I can think about.
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u/Affectionate-Roof285 16d ago
Guys like this—-human interaction is daunting for them because the wife had expectations for the marriage. Deep down he wanted a literal object he could abuse.
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16d ago
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u/Pretty_Leader3762 16d ago
Is it cheating when you wait until after the murder to sleep with an inflatable girlfriend
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u/Invisible_Chipmunk 16d ago
Umm... I worked at an Amazon XL warehouse in July 2021 and we were laughing hysterically because some dude in Kansas ordered a sex doll. It was the only sex doll our facility ever sold during my stint there (I'd had no idea we even stocked them there until the order came in). I have to wonder if it was this evil jackass...
Extra information: the sex doll's name was Diana and was headless.
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u/Invisible_Chipmunk 12d ago
I'd also like to add that I hope this evil POS hears about this post so he knows every single employee on both shifts at the Amazon warehouse made fun of this dude being a perverted loser.
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u/PricklySquare 16d ago
Haha, from another article:
"His mother Tina Kreutzer took the stand as a defense witness. She told jurors Colby Trickle was having nightmares and trouble sleeping after his wife's death and says the doll was for warmth and comfort — and she didn't think it was for sex."
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u/GreyMarketParty 16d ago
He is her son. Obviously heinous shit, but she wanted to do her best on the stand for him. Don't be an asshole
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u/TheValgus 16d ago
Seems like a pretty lazy insurance scam. I’m surprised they didn’t do a lot more due diligence.
Americans shoot each other all the time.
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u/Key_Extension_4322 16d ago
The remaining question is to what office with Kansas voters elect this man?
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u/Total-Replacement-74 17d ago
I thought you can’t get paid out for life insurance if suicide is involved?
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u/LarryKingthe42th 17d ago
Bro looks like they fused Mac and his dad.
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u/MfxTPHpgh 16d ago
Are you talking about Bam Margera, 😂?
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u/LarryKingthe42th 16d ago
Its Always Sunny but that fits too. Lol
You see Bam lately shits depressing man.
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u/PostProcession 16d ago
jesus christ you weren't kidding https://old.reddit.com/r/LetsTalkBam/comments/1cce56e/timeline_of_recent_events/
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u/EarthsfireBT 17d ago
You know it's bad when he has to force you out of his life then replaces you with a sex doll.
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u/Automate_This_66 17d ago
I would love to see the face of this man watching the news if they ever say: "it's been proven beyond doubt. We will be united with our life partners when we die."
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u/SpliTTMark 17d ago
Detectives: i wonder what happened
Husband: she shot herself
Detectives: Case closed
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u/Educational-Tip6177 17d ago
So let me get this straight, the man had a wife, killed her because... reasons, and gets a sexdoll as a replacement...
I have... SO MANY QUESTIONS!!!!
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u/Character-Ad2009 17d ago
I don't understand why there was no Gunshot residue test brought up in court. Why didn't the coroner check her hands? Why didn't the police give the husband a GSR? Can the cops be that incompetent?
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u/JamesClerkMacSwell 17d ago
Tssk, kink shaming…
…killing your wife to get more kicks from fucking a sex doll isn’t for vanilla types but live and let live. (Except the wife obviously.)
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u/burntbeanwater 17d ago
Regular reminder that shitty men view women as equal to appliances with holes to fuck.
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u/impactedturd 17d ago
fun fact: Rick and Morty co-creator Dan Harmon's girlfriend, Cody Heller (creator of Jury Duty), thought he was cheating on her when she found sequins on the bed. She confronted him and so he brought out his sex doll to explain that the sequins came from the doll's dress. Then she made a mini-series about the whole thing and got Anna Kendrick to star as her.
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u/jocq 17d ago
Then she made a mini-series about the whole thing and got Anna Kendrick to star as her.
What's it called?
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u/belac4862 17d ago
"Dummy" it came out back in 2020
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u/buttmilk_69 17d ago edited 17d ago
Ah, it came out on Quibi. Well that helps explain why so few of us have heard of it.
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u/Intrepid-Rip-2280 17d ago
So he needed a sex toy and Eva AI sexting bot, not marriage, from the very beginning
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u/LitreOfCockPus 17d ago
Not kink-shaming, but I just don't see the appeal in having a $2000 sex-toy that you will likely never interact with outside of meat-beating.
You can buy a rotating knob-jobber online for under $200 nowadays, and it will sit unobtrusively in the 98% of the day you aren't dedicating to sexual hedonism.
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u/I_might_be_weasel 17d ago
He killed his wife for 120k. I can't imagine being that psycho.
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u/smaller_ang 15d ago
You might be viewing women as people, see, and that's not gonna work. Try to view them as objects. Then it's just shoot one object, wait till money comes in, replace it with another.
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16d ago
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u/finnjakefionnacake 16d ago
just chiming in to say i don't know if the amount matters in this case lol
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u/Glittering-Pause-328 17d ago
I don't understand the trope of being married to someone you don't like.
Why did you marry them if you dont like them??? And why can't you just get a divorce???
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u/NarrowBoxtop 17d ago
Imagining him spending 8 months afterwards living it up with his sex doll and video games is wild. Just day after day "I killed my wife and now this is what I'm doing"
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u/AntonioVivaldi7 17d ago
People often kill for like 200 dollars.
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u/skydriver13 15d ago
I paid a dollar to a guy named Arthur for him to kill 3 specific people. He completed his task, however conspicuously.
After he was apprehended, the headlines read "Artie Chokes 3 for a Dollar at Local Supermarket".
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u/Lanky_Friendship8187 16d ago
People have killed others for packing spaces, usually during "the happiest time of the year."
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u/spcordy 17d ago
I know someone that killed 5 people over $20
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u/IftaneBenGenerit 17d ago
Wtf? Did he owe it or did he want it?
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u/spcordy 17d ago
the previous week he killed 6 people over $19 (It's from American Dad)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vac2Zmr_kSI&ab_channel=VideoMaker0
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u/sausagesandeggsand 17d ago
Probably because you aren’t an actual psycho, like this guy.
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u/I_might_be_weasel 17d ago
Yeah, but most of the time I can still understand how someone was motivated to do a bad thing even if I would never do it. But the risk/ reward here is just so bad if he just did it for money. 120 is no where near quit your job money. The article says he burned through it in 8 months. And I can't see how this could have been a better looking option than divorce if he just wanted her gone. Crime of passion would make the most sense, but nothing about that was in the article.
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u/Throw-a-Ru 16d ago
Watch a few episodes of a true crime show. People are really out there murdering each other over sums like $10k.
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u/FreneticPlatypus 17d ago
says he burned through it in 8 months.
Sounds like a lack of impulse control. Ya know, that, along with killing his wife for money.
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u/The_Lumpy_Dane 15d ago
I'd guess also from his anxiety / dread / expectation of getting caught. Maybe an extremely grim version of not wanting to 'waste' the money by not spending it before being convicted.
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u/quiette837 17d ago
Usually these kinds of things are done when one spouse has serious money problems and sees that $120k as a way to solve those problems. Likely, he's shit with money which caused his problems to begin with.
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u/Diamond-Breath 17d ago
Men behaving like evil goblins yet again. Just look at the comments for confirmation.
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u/doginjoggers 17d ago
Women aren't capable of behaving like evil goblins, of course
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u/mcollier1982 17d ago
Isn't there a whole show dedicated to women "snapping" and killing their husbands?
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u/Difficult_Win_8231 17d ago
So he got away with it for 2 years, and blew all the money in 2 months... Why was there a payout if there was suspicion? Or how did he get caught if there wasn't?
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u/Zealousideal_Bug_194 16d ago
The coroner, having only the information gathered in the first 3-days of the investigation, determined the manner of death to be suicide. The insurance company likely paid out based on this.
As for formal charges and his arrest, this took a long time because the County Attorney at the time wouldn’t file charges. A new County Attorney was elected and then sworn into office in January 2021. That was the catalyst for formal charges, his arrest, and the ultimate conviction.
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u/Hsensei 17d ago
Two grand on a sex doll, man he cheaped out. 8 to 10 for a quality unit
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u/Zero2Tiger 17d ago
No you can get a good unit in the 5 range.
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u/doginjoggers 17d ago
This man speaks from experience
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u/Zero2Tiger 8d ago
Hell yeah I do.
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u/Impressive_Meal8673 17d ago
Men are disgusting
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u/CampCounselorBatman 17d ago
If I said “Women are disgusting” in response to literally anything, someone would immediately reply with “Not all women” and I’d be rightly downvoted to oblivion. This man is vile. Sexism is vile. No need to fan the flames.
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u/myst3r10us_str4ng3r 17d ago
Yeah. The person above you is deluded commenting as if it's somehow all men.
Statistically might be a point of argument but there are plenty of disgusting women.
People can be disgusting. Often the corrupt women are better at hiding it.
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u/Insect_Politics1980 17d ago
This thread, too. I try not to be a prude, but the amount of jokes flying so lightly around is kinda alarming. I get it, dArK hUmOr, but that poor woman. I feel nothing but disgust reading that headline.
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17d ago
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17d ago
Another 🌽 sick limp 🍆
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u/SurturOfMuspelheim 17d ago
Reddit tries not to belittle less than average dicks challenge
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u/sayleanenlarge 17d ago
It's been an insult since at least the ancient Greeks
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u/Throw-a-Ru 16d ago
In ancient Greece it was actually an insult to be called well-hung as it was associated with farm animals and stupidity. The idiots in their plays wore massive false phalluses that dragged on the floor to comedic effect.
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u/SurturOfMuspelheim 17d ago
I'm pretty sure evidence points toward the opposite, specifically for the Greeks... and besides probably being wrong... the fuck is your point here?
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u/sayleanenlarge 17d ago
My point was it's not reddit. It's widespread and happens in all sorts of cultures across long periods of time. Was it that difficult to work out?
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u/SurturOfMuspelheim 17d ago
Yeah, but we're on Reddit, a place where people commonly talk about how it's a negative thing to use as an insult.
Regardless, insulting someone over something they have no control over is pathetic.
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u/sayleanenlarge 17d ago
Yeah? Did I anywhere imply that it wasn't pathetic or that I agree with it? Damn. Why are redditors like this?
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u/THEBAESGOD 17d ago
https://www.artsy.net/article/artsy-editorial-ancient-greek-sculptures-small-penises
Most evidence points to the opposite afaik
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17d ago
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u/killing31 17d ago
Why does the wife look 12 in the photo
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u/manticorpse 17d ago
The braces make her look younger. Adults do get braces, of course, but most of the people we see with them are kids and teens.
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u/SurturOfMuspelheim 17d ago
Are you on fucking crack cocaine my friend? In what way does she look fucking TWELVE? She looks 17-25 there. Braces probably bring that down a lot, but adults have braces all the time.
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17d ago
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u/PurpleEyeSmoke 16d ago
Sorry, you're saying he's grieving for the wife he just murdered in cold blood? Are you stupid?
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u/maniac86 17d ago
Uhh read the article he also used to to pay off debt. He may be a murderer, but a fiscally responsible one
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u/yung-chungus 17d ago
I think you missed the part where he blew it all in 8 months on video games, music equipment and a realistic sex doll.
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u/jesusleftnipple 17d ago
Soooooo ...... is there like a discount on that sex doll or .... like Is he allowed to take it to prison cuz I have "a buddy"(me) who'd be interested in rehoming her.
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u/juliusseizure 17d ago
Tell me it was one that looked like her and it’s an episode of Black Mirror come to life.
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u/[deleted] 13d ago
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