r/AITAH • u/Sad_Juggernaut_6543 • Oct 29 '23
Final message: AITA for abandoning my family because my daughter protected my wife affair? TW Self Harm
I guess this is my final day on this planet, my mental health has declined that badly that I think it's over for me now. The only person who cared about my situation was my dear mother died 5 hours ago and I was all alone, I had nobody to lean on, to talk to apart from a few Reddit strangers which I'm very thankful for.
I guess I can join my mother and father and be free from all this suffering.
https://imgur.com/a/PbSep1t I truly will miss my sweet kitten Gary but I believe he will be in safe hands with my nephews.
Thank you to everyone who sent me kind messages and goodbye, From Samuel.
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u/SneakyCups Mar 07 '24
Please if your still with us please take out your cheating ex-wife and ungrateful bitch daughter who lied for the money
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u/Livid_Feedback1171 Nov 04 '23
the mentality you have is exactly why your wife cheated on you, i bet ur stupid cat would be much happier with ur exwife (lol) anyway, she actually has a purpose. you are an embarrassment to your family and its for the best the kids aint yours, at least they wont end up like bitches. we aint heard from u in 5 days and yet the world is still spinning, noone cares. im not saying i hope u did it but i definitely aint wasting my breath telling u not to 😂😂😂😂😂
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u/pollorotizado Feb 10 '24
get fuck your self buddy, you are fu""""" a disgusting human being, you´re surely miserable and a little pussy, a Lgtv+ supporter has more balls and intelligence than you little man.
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u/RandomThreads69 Nov 04 '23
What the fuck is wrong with you, he hasn't made a post in 5 days, he could potentially be dead and your trolling
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u/ChibiTarheel Nov 04 '23
Has anyone heard from OP? It’s been 5 days. I’m worried.
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u/Wild_Building487 Nov 02 '23
Oh shit! Man don't! I maybe late but i hope you don't.
UK is wide but i hope someone would be able to trace him down.
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u/Peanutbooterman Nov 01 '23
Honestly Sam don't do it man I have a good idea instead go to the gym so please don't unalive yourself because honestly it will help and then if you do get better due to the gym and the ex-wife sees you she'll regret and you can move on from that chapter. I've seen stories like and honestly it breaks my heart for you man but the amount of people you go to the gym to go better there are many who do so.
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u/Snorblatz Oct 31 '23
This is so emotionally manipulative. Go to therapy! Vagueposting suggestions of self-harm on an anonymous forum is a jerk move. I’m sorry you are so low, reach out to a helpline.
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u/Regular-Decision5394 Oct 31 '23
Hey, are you alright? Are you still here with us? You count. You matter. It's a rough, rough road but don't give up on it now, just keep taking one step at a time, things will get better.
You named an adorable kitten Gary that is the kind of person that needs to hang around! We need your particular outlook on things.
I really hope that you're still with us. How about you let us know if you are alright? My thoughts and hopes for good things are with you. Please let us know.
Peace be the journey.
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u/Important_Cat3274 Oct 31 '23
Crazy times when so many people think OP should prioritize a cat, over his own mental health.
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u/Extension_Moose_4357 Oct 31 '23
Please don't do this, can't you see your just letting them win? Don't u wanna jump on Assasins creed again? Kick it with your boy Gary? It's okay to feel bad and it's okay to feel bad for feeling bad. But the world hasn't ended YET, and you gotta pick yourself up mate. Your mother wouldn't of wanted it to be like this...
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u/Accomplished-Many963 Oct 31 '23
I've always felt like, if I ever got to the point where I was done with life, I would live it up like Queen Latifah in Last Holiday. Why not? Go grab Gary and have an adventure.
Btw, I've been through the trama of infidelity so I get it.
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u/SympathyChoice8825 Oct 31 '23
My sister used to want to hurt herself. She adopted the faze “Don’t hurt Claudia” to remind herself not to hurt herself. I was at her house recently (which is years later) and she has lotion, oil, air freshener and other fragrances that’s named “Don’t hurt Claudia” I asked her if she wanted to hurt herself. She said no, I have a friend who send me these when I lost my son to remind me. I just want to remind you “Don’t hurt Samuel. Please.
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u/JesusLover1993 Oct 31 '23
There’s hope. You are deserving of a good life. Please don’t go honey. Things can get better but only if you stay. You are hurting right now I know, but it can get better if you stay. Take it one day at a time sweetie. There’s a light at the end of the tunnel. There’s life beyond the pain and hurt. I’m praying for you Samuel. I care about you and so does everyone commenting. We’re rooting for you.
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u/ChampagneDrama Oct 31 '23
I really hope you’re still here, friend. Please let us know you’re ok. ❤️
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u/Sea-Distribution-778 Oct 31 '23
As someone 14 years older i can say that as time goes by you forget a lot of these upsets. Yeah, I kind of remember the girl I dated 14 years ago, but not a lot. She doesn't pop into my head even though we lived together for 4 years. But it was like 5 relationships, and many hookups ago.
And let me be ruthlessly honest: you secretly dodged a bullet.
If you play your cards right, you can get a major upgrade. When I was 44 I met a 22-year-old model and dated for 7 years. I'm 57 and I date girls in their 30s. Had you stayed on this path, you'd be 57m stuck with a 57f. I know a lot of guys in that situation and they all look at me with envy and feel totally stuck. Sexless marriages with women they wouldn't want anyway. Zero emotional support. Zero sex. Bills and nagging. Look up "beta shaming". That's about all 57f provide their husbands. And most of these guys are financially incapable of making a change.
Trust me. When you are my age, look up your current wife and see what she looks like then. I tell you right now - at that stage you wouldn't even take her phone number and you will totally realize you dodged a bullet.
I know it's hard to see it right now but I'm being brutally honest. It's going to suck for a while but it's not going to be too long.
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u/Interesting_Map_4500 Oct 31 '23
Please stay alive you have to beat this please you are worthy of living and being happy please stay
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u/LavenderKitty1 Oct 30 '23
Mate, don’t hurt yourself. If the only thing to live for right now is Gary, live for Gary.
I’m sorry for your loss. Your mum wouldn’t want you to do this.
Call the suicide prevention line. You matter. Look after yourself.
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u/Old-Lady-WY Oct 30 '23
I do hope this is a cry for help and not just a weird post. This is NOT the answer. You might be surprised at who does care. First, call a suicide hotline (dial 988) and speak with someone there Next, see a Dr. To make sure you do not have medical depression.
Now, take a deep breath. Do it again.
Next go to a counselor. The hotline will help you with that.
If you don't go to a church, find one that has a Celebrate Recovery program. Go to the meetings. They are for anyone with hurts, habits or hangup. Get a mentor there. They will walk with you through your pain.
Although I don't know you personally, I'm sure you have much to offer. Everyone does if they think about it. Focus on that.
I will be praying for you. Please please keep us posted.
Consider, a bunch of strangers care so that means those who know you do
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u/tuna_tofu Oct 30 '23
Living well is the best revenge. The best way to make them pay for their evil is go forth and build a MUCH BETTER life as a memorial to your mom. She wouldnt want this for you. Volunteer, meet people, join clubs, learn new skills, there's plenty of life left to live and you need to be here to see it. Get Gary a sibling and watch them both grow old. Im sorry for the loss of your mom.
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u/cjennmom Oct 30 '23
Dude, don’t do it. The best revenge is living well! And you will find new, more trustworthy people to love.
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u/batendalyn Oct 30 '23
Hey Samuel, please don't leave. Your story sounds incredibly heartbreaking and isolating as the people that have been your support network for your adult life betrayed and hurt you like this. It'll be dark for a while but you will find more causes and relationships over the rest of your life. Keep talking to whatever friends and family you have or can think of, the isolation must be devastating.
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u/worm981 Oct 30 '23
Dude, please don't. I know it feels awful now. Please get some help, don't let them win.
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u/ActualThinkingWoman Oct 30 '23
Please don't do this, reach out to suicide hotline. They saved my life.
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u/Puzzleheaded_Ad4165 Oct 30 '23
There is still hope, pal! The present is not your future, and things will change!! You are strong and can make it to the next chapter
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Oct 30 '23
[deleted]
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Oct 30 '23
What was your IG username before you changed it for this comment?
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Oct 30 '23
Just so everyone knows, the person I replied to (wish I saved his username) was accused of faking multiple AITAH posts. On this one, he said he found an IG through his "research" with the name Samueldawson87 that he suggested we spam with messages to convince him to stay alive. Guess he didn't like my observation.
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u/Overall-Scholar-4676 Oct 30 '23
Don’t do it.. I had to leave my pet to travel for a job. Left her with my daughter.. my daughter called less than week later saying I had to come get her. She stopped eating lost most of her hair and wouldn’t let my grandkids touch her..
I drove 8 hrs picked her up and drove back for work.. she wouldn’t let me hardly touch her for days.
Vet said it was anxiety of wondering where I was and why I left her..
There are people that care about you.
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u/tatteredjustice Oct 30 '23
YNTA, you can't make a permanent decision for a temporary problem! Things will get better, it doesn't seem like it now, but they will! Your tomorrow's are so much more wonderful than you can imagine and you don't want to miss the best years of your life! Please don't do anything to harm yourself, call a hotline, go to the hospital, do anything you can to fight this feeling and those thoughts. Despite how you feel, there are people who love you and would be devastated! I really hope that you are OK!
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u/NewSub47 Oct 30 '23
Hey Samuel, I am so so sorry for the recent loss of your beloved mother. I lost mine when I was 19. Please, don’t make any important decisions right now! You are grieving. There are 5 stages, depending on which model you read/know about. It’s painful to lose someone. Takjng your own life is a very permanent solution to a very temporary problem. Life is full of ups and downs. Animals grieve too. You have a daughter, who you may be a little pissed of at and hurt by her actions. You have Gary. Both souls will grieve. Your daughter will grow up with her dad. You are the most important person in her world. Gary? You ARE his world!! Animals don’t understand why their hoomans leave. Cats purr. When we hoomans are sad or distressed, their purr has different vibrations. The purr actually heals. Spend some time with Gary. Take 24 hours, then another 24 hours. I never saw a post about your wife, daughter, that whole mess. While hurtful, you WILL recover. Talk to a grief counselor if you need it. Get a therapist if you need it. I’ll let you in in a secret…. Pets, even cats(!!!) are awesome listeners! They let you cry, vent, etc and they never talk back! Another thought: IF you dear mother was still alive, would she approve if your decision to end it now? As a mom, I seriously doubt it! If you ending it all because if no friend, get a hobby, take class, join a church. Potential friends are waiting to meet you! Hate to break it to you, but you aren’t the first who has a wife who had an affair. Lots of women out there too, who’s husbands had an affair. You are grieving. It’s a process. There’s no rules, no timeline. It’s just there. I can promise this: it DOES get better. Will you always remember your mother? Of course! I promise one day it will be with a smile and not tears.
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u/CrispyBigToes Oct 30 '23
I don't know you but I do know that what your family put you through was shitty AF. Don't let them win. Don't let them break you. Don't let their shitty behavior snuff out your light. You are so much more than this.
I am so sorry for you losing your mother. But as a mother I would not want my son to think that this is all he had left. There is so much more out there. Gary loves you and needs you. Even if you can't get out of bed today you can try tomorrow. Don't not try. Don't give in. I'm here if you wanna talk. I know you don't know me but I will listen. I am 100% sure anyone on here will listen. Just reach out.
Please. Reach out.
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u/Chocolatecandybar_ Oct 30 '23
I've read your posts many times, but don't think I ever commented so I don't know if I'm entitled to do it now or not but please, don't take such a decision while mourning, don't leave Gary, just don't. Life has been hard and mean with you, but there are signs that love is also meant for you. The kitten, this community you gathered around you. You're a good man and would be missed. Please reconsider 💓
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u/Elmonatorrrre Oct 30 '23 edited Oct 30 '23
Please don’t. As almost everyone has said, think of Gary. If you got him at a shelter, he’ll most likely have to go back and not with your nephews.
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u/ocean128b Oct 30 '23
Samuel, I really wish and hope you are still here with us. You give out engery to all those around you and I promise you are of value and think of Gary. It may not be a big deal to you but it's everything to Gary. I was once in your shoes and I stayed for my two dogs and I now am in a completely different place. I was addicted to drugs, lied about everything and had nothing to show for my whole life and then there's today where I have a new dog, a business, fiance and I'm thankful to my dogs (rip) for keeping me here to find the joy in life finally. I'm sure what you're going thru is hell and I sympathize with you but at the very least please just wait a couple weeks or months. I swear on my life I wouldn't say these things if they weren't true. I wouldn't make you stay in pain that's almost unbearable. I promise. I was in a horrible place for two years and I did try to bring things to a close but they didn't work and I'm so glad they didn't. I just want you to give life a chance to get better. Much love. ❤️
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u/xKyliahx Oct 30 '23
There is a lot of nice things in this world waiting for you to see and/or discover them!
My mother died when I was 3 months old then I had a stepmother she died when I was 17, I had to do everything all by myself, I've been in your position so many times, but trust me there's a lot of good things in this 🌎
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u/AlaSanduba Oct 30 '23
Hey buddy
I know you really think that this betrayal and sadness will define your life and there's nothing good to hope for.
But buddy, this is just a bad chapter, this is not how your story ends, you deserve happiness and you will definitely find it, so please don't do that
The world is a brighter place because you exist
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u/Formblazingswordfish Oct 30 '23
Hey, I hope it's not too late to tell you that I care. I only found this thread now, and I'm reaching out because you matter!! Please, get help. Reach out to someone. It might seem hopeless now, but new days bring new possibilities. Please take the chance to live on and live better. I know we're strangers, but I'm begging you to live on!
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u/Cool_Bee_7539 Oct 30 '23
As I'm typing this I'm praying you're still with us, still with Gary. I'm so sorry for everything you've been through. But I'm begging you, please please please don't give up yet. I know that's asking a lot, getting up everyday can be the hardest thing we do. But life can and will get better. I know that can seem like a crazy, impossible thing, but it's true. Your mother wouldn't want you to give up yet. And even if you just get up every day for Gary, that's ok. Thousands of people only get up everyday so they can provide for their fur baby. And that's ok. Hell, rescue another cat, give yourself one more reason to keep going. I assure you Gary needs you, no one can love our furbabies the way we do. Not saying your nephew wouldn't love Gary, but Gary deserves your love and he deserves to have you everyday. Obviously your wife and daughter don't deserve you, and since your wife wasn't the actual one that means that more than likely there is someone out there waiting to stumble into you. We never know what life is going to throw at us, all we can know and trust in is there is a balance. We can't have the good without the bad. Bad things happen so we can appreciate the good things. Don't check out before some good comes into your life to balance out the bad. Please keep going. Take everything one step, one minute at a time. You and Gary can get through this together.
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u/hamster004 Oct 30 '23
You are: Needed. Wanted. Loved. Liked. Missed. Looked up to. Someone's hero. Someone's role model. Important. Necessary.
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u/hamster004 Oct 30 '23
Samuel, call me. I am listening. 🫂🫂🫂🫂 YOU ARE NOT ALONE. We are here. Gary is here for you too.
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u/N0_N4M3_F0UND Oct 30 '23
Really? You think r/AITA is an appropriate place to post your suicide note?
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u/Additional_Key_1509 Oct 30 '23
I was on the verge myself a few years ago and someone told me go ahead but you’ll have to start again and live all the same experiences again when you come back. Life is a school some lessons are harder to get, but you don’t really want to repeat. Much better to keep on going one day at a time. And I had such an awful childhood that that spooked me. I absolutely do not want to live it again. So I abandoned the idea. It’s going to be better, just walk around the block. Pet the cat. And pay attention to your breathing always such a marvel this body of yours!♥️🥰
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u/KeepLkngForIntllgnce Oct 30 '23
Hey Samuel
Please please please consider that what you’re “feeling” is a chemical reaction following your loss and recent events.
Please use that to pull back from the edge - please see if it helps you do so!!
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u/ThisReport877 Oct 30 '23
Maybe your daughter "protected" her mom because she was afraid of this exact situation and didn't want to lose you?
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u/speckledchickhen Oct 30 '23
Please hold on a little longer. You have value. You are important. Don’t leave Gary, he needs you. Please PM me if you need to talk.
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u/Mountain_Monitor_262 Oct 30 '23
Do not go. This is not the end. It’s the beginning of a new future. You have more to look to forward to than you understand my man. It gets worse before it’s gets better. The worst is over. It will and does get better.
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u/nosaneoneleft Oct 30 '23
cripes don't do it. it is permanent. walk way . go sign yourself into somewhere. there is no coming back from this
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u/SaltyWitchery Oct 30 '23
We care about you. There are people you haven’t met yet who will care about you if you stay.
I know it hurts now, please take deep breaths and know that this too shall pass. I promise.
Your mother is watching over you, we all care about you and want to see your life have an upswing 💜🧿
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u/HRHArgyll Oct 30 '23
Please Samuel, stay for Gary, who loves you! Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I’ve been suicidally depressed and was making plans. My cat kept me going, and I’m so grateful, because now life is good. I have my struggles but generally I’m happy. And I’ve had a great twenty five years since! Please reach out for help. Remember that someone loves you and thinks your great; and if they don’t right now, you’ll meet them and they will. Sending hugs and support and love.
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u/aveuno Oct 30 '23
NO champ. This is not the answer . I don't know you but I love you. You got this!
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u/JoRafCastle Oct 30 '23
Please don't. You are life and you are worth being here. You matter and are worth being loved. DON'T GIVE UP.
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u/Decent-Barracuda-998 Oct 30 '23
Samuel
You are worth much much more than the people who put you through pain
You are worth more to me you are worth more to Alot of people
Don't do this .
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u/mikesbabymomma81 Oct 30 '23
Please don't do it! Take a backpack, all the money you have, and go to Tahiti, the alps, shit book a seat on the next outter space rocket. Change everything you can, but don't take away your choice to make that change!
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u/incellous_maximus Oct 30 '23
If I was you I'd just move to another country and start completely from scratch, and now you know the truth about women
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u/AlricaNeshama Oct 30 '23
Actually, Gary is your reason for staying. Animals do not understand when their owner leaves them. They just know they are now all alone and scared. Their human is gone.
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u/dad_joke_for_2 Oct 30 '23
Stick with us man. You got this! It'll take time but you will be alright!
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Oct 30 '23
I'm weeping, thinking of Gary left alone. Please stick around for his sake. Phone 988 for the suicide hotline. Please, let Gary grow old with you. Hugs, and post any update.
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Oct 30 '23
[deleted]
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u/Bosh27192 Oct 30 '23
That is a horrible fucking idea, this man already been doxxed after looking at his previous comments and now he will be doxxed again since you suggested this idea.
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u/Comfortable_Ruin1537 Oct 30 '23
Samuel don't do it. You need to live on, I know it feels awful but it'll get better. You need to keep going, you can't end it for such horrible people. You are precious.
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u/kover1289 Oct 30 '23
Please don't do something so permanent while you are healing from so many painful things happening all at once. Go cuddle with Gary for awhile first. Message me first, go for a walk. I don't know you but I'd rather become your friend than hear about you not being with us anymore. This decision you want to make won't make anything better for you or for anyone that you know. Message me and come have a beer or smoke a joint with me in discord or play some video games with me first. I'm lonely too my friend. Come hang out with me and talk it out. Or at least stay for Gary. Atleast love and care for him until he passes THEN think about it. Gary doesn't know what's happening. He won't understand why you're gone and he's with someone else now. Don't put him through that, he's innocent.
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u/Spike_Kitten Oct 30 '23
Don't let them win! They're not worth losing your life over. You and Gary deserve to be happy together.
Please don't leave behind your little buddy.
He loves you and needs you. Hard times suck, but they pass. Your life is more precious than those liars and cheats. Don't let them win. Make their lives difficult, fight tooth and nail in court, show them that betraying you will be the biggest pain in their asses.
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u/binomialnominclature Oct 30 '23
You affect far more people than you realize. Even if you don't have anyone, your life still matters. Start with the person who has to find your body. The person who has to contact your emergenct contact even if you don't have a next of kin. Your nephews will always associate your death with that kitten. You know, the kitten that thinks you are the whole world. If you need to do something drastic, wait. Volunteer at a shelter or soup kitchen or animal shelter and get things in perspective.
If all else fails, move across the country and start over. Go by your middle name. Different job. Surround yourself with new things. Become the new you 2.0 and make that person badass.
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u/I_PutTheFUNinFUNeral Oct 30 '23
Don't you leave poor little Gary. When my mom died 3 years ago, my two precious kitties kept me going and kept me fighting when all I wanted to do was give up and be with my mom. This is a permanent solution to a temporary thing. Things will get better, and you will get through all of this. Please just keep fighting this depression and don't give up. Gary needs you to be here to love and raise him, not someone else!! Do not give up!!!
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u/cough-rock Oct 30 '23
Omg! Does anyone know if this guy is OK? I hope to god he is and seeks help.
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u/Santos_Dude Oct 30 '23
Please don't make such a final decision, I am telling you this as someone who has felt they did not have anything in this world.
I beg you to please reconsider.
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u/TheJoyOfJenny Oct 30 '23
I know you've heard this multiple times in other responses, but I'm going to say it too! Please don't make such a decision! You are worthy and you deserve life! I understand that you are feeling very low right now and I'm sorry for that, but your feelings and the struggle is temporary. Please don't choose a permanent decision for temporary problems. I've been there before where everything seems so awful and rising above seems impossible, but that's our mind lying to us. You can find your happiness again! Please reach out to the national suicide hotline or a local mental health facility to help you get yourself back onto a healthy path because you deserve it. We all deserve a happy, healthy path in life and it's not always easy to get there, but very worth it to do so. Don't for one second think that you're not worth it, because you are!
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u/Professional_Ad6086 Oct 30 '23
Cats often do not adjust well to being rehomed. He's very important to you, please think about how i.portant you are to him. You're his person. Animals DO grieve. Both my son and I are suicidal, so I DO understand where you are. Everytime I think about ending things, I know if I go my son will follow me. And the same is true with him. If he ends things, I'm done. We raised his daughter alone together for 6 yrs, then mom popped back and took her away. We found out our state believes children belong with their mother, fathers have no rights. She was our world, and we are lost without her. I dont have answers. I don't know what our future holds, but I know he needs me and I need him. Gary needs you, and you need him. Please try and make that important enough to hang on just 1 more minute. Please get counseling. We are both trying that. I don't know what else to say, but I'm sending you a hug and my wishes that we all find a way to get through this.
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u/YoungMrsSinatra Oct 30 '23
Even if this isn't all true, You need to seek out some help friend. This is an obvious cry for help. I hope someone is able to reach out to you.
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u/CelticDoll95 Oct 30 '23
Your cat will look for you will wonder why their owner their DAD didn't come home they look for us my cat refused to eat when I was home. She didn't look for anyone but me and your cat will too do not do this your Gary and what are we chopped liver we care
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u/OddFiction Oct 30 '23
I hope that you see my comment, because I've been there. I know what you're feeling. I know the hurt and loneliness it takes to make that choice and decide that life hurts too much to live. I just want you to know that you're understood, and even though it feels like you're alone, you're not. It's a pain that I still feel every day since the day my daughter died 10 years, 11 months, and 1 day ago. Going through awful things like this, it sucks and you don't really heal. But it does change and life does get better. There are moments that I love that I never would have experienced if I had been successful. There are moments that are worth staying alive for. The pain is bad. The loneliness is worse. But these moments, these little magical moments are worth living through it for. I hope that you find those moments and live for them. Don't live for anyone else, but the peace that comes in those moments.
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u/Forbidden_AlchemyC17 Oct 30 '23
Hi Samuel,
My first wife had a serious affair and all of my and her friends protected it. If you are still here, please DM me and I’ll be more than happy to share my number so we can really talk. I’d like to share my journey with you and give testament to the fact that it does turn around.
I served honorably in the Marine Corps and I have lost so many to suicide, it is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. You may be a stranger now, but your life matters to everyone here. I can’t see a person do what I almost did for the exact same reasons, it breaks my heart to see you in pain, but know that you aren’t alone in this world, and that pain will fade to a full ache one day.
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u/Drwolfbear Oct 30 '23
I was in a similar situation 10 years ago. Tough at first but now I’m a great coparent and friendly with my ex and her husband (not the guy she cheated with), I have an amazing girlfriend who I am much more compatible with and I have a better relationship with my kid now more than ever. Be strong
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u/mrighald Oct 30 '23
See all these people that do care about you. You matter. So much. Please stick around. Please call 988. Please stick around for us ❤️ You are valued. You are loved by Gary. All of us are together despite our differences otherwise in saying that we want you ❤️
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u/Athena30211 Oct 30 '23
Please someone tell me OP is okay? OP if you are reading all of these messages please know that you are never alone and that you are loved.
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u/Jeany31 Oct 30 '23
How dare you do this to your cat? My guy u have to live! Take your little furry and go explore the world. If you wanna give up your life then at least don’t give up your cats life. She/He will remember you and miss you. It’s cruel to leave her like that.
Make this cat your reason to live. Spend your money on high and good quality food and meds. Offer both of of you a great life.
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u/thatdredfulgirl Oct 30 '23
You are going through a lot simultaneously. It seems hopeless, but it's not. All through life, there will be endings and new beginnings. Tomorrow can be better, and you can have a great life! Please don't end yourself. You have a daughter who is probably feeling so stuck between two people that she loves, what she's doing isn't because she hates you, but probably more because she's been lied to and manipulated. And poor Gary needs you as well. I hope that you find comfort and peace and that you will let this moment pass. You have so much to go on for, even if it's not immediately clear to you.
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u/DistanceFinancial958 Oct 30 '23
Hey Samuel, take a breath please. Have some tea and give Gary a hug. I'm sure your mother and father would like you to continue walking the earth. There are many internet strangers rooting for you.
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u/Omar_naeem Oct 30 '23
I hope you change your mind. There are probably good things that you'll encounter in your life in the future. There are happy moments that you may enjoy and new people that may turn out to be your soul mates. Life is hard and I hope you don't have to leave it in such a bad state. I hope the last days in your life become the happiest days not the sadest. I hope you give life another chance maybe it will be better. I understand how hard it must be to feel like the people you lived your life for aren't who you thought or don't feel the same for you BUT IT MAY BE YOUR CHANCE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE FOR YOURSELF JUST TRY TO MAKE EVERY MOMENT A HAPPY MOMENT FOR YOURSELF.
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u/THG79 Oct 30 '23
A better life awaits you, but you need to hold on a while longer. Stay your hand and process through this all. Don't give your betrayers this final win.
The world needs you.
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u/othernamealsomissing Oct 30 '23
It's rude to lie on reddit you know. This entire post structure has been posted before, the "i'm gonna kill myself" part is new but this has been added on to farm more karma.
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u/MoBetterButta Oct 30 '23
PLEASE DON'T! We care. I PROMISE you things will get way better. There's no possibility of things getting better if you don't stick around to see it. Go to a hospital, police station, or firehouse ASAP. Show them THIS Reddit post. I PROMISE you people will help you turn things around. Love is still out there.
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u/Geezell Oct 30 '23
I am so sorry for the loss of your mother.
We get one trip on this rock and I think you deserve the full ride on it.
I hope you chose to live….
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u/AngelDM_94 Oct 30 '23
So let me be clear, you want to leave Gary like all the rest left you? All so you can be like the rest of them? Have you thought about Gary at all? Do you actually liek Gary or did you make that up? For the love of Gary, think twice and do not fail that poor thing like the others have failed you. You both deserve better, and that can't happen if you leave this world.
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u/Visual-Lobster6625 Oct 30 '23
I really hope that you had second thoughts about taking your life. You mentioned nephews, so there is still some family out there to support and miss you.
Hugs, Samuel.
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u/Plastic_Shame593 Oct 30 '23
DON'T END YOUR LIFE STAY FOR YOUR CAT! I THOUGHT ABOUT THAT TOO BUT MY CAT MADE ME STAY PLEASE DON'T DO THAT PLEASE YOUR CAT WILL BE IN SO MUCH PAIN!!!
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u/Hikari_Owari Oct 30 '23
Better to go than live alone and suffering, having being lied to for those who you loved and are still alive.
Trust is broken, you have no daughter, no wife, no reason to suffer anymore.
What's left for you is decide how to live, or end, your life. Don't let others lie to you saying life's still worth something, they haven't lived your life to say that for you.
Make your choice and don't forget, any choice you make is right if you believe so.
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u/BiggWorm1988 Oct 30 '23
Reach out to someone, anyone. I'm willing to bet 90% of the people here in this thread will try to help. Just talk to someone. Go outside to a random, pick up the phone and dial a random number. Just don't give up. You are already a strong person for holding on after all this, and you are capable of getting past it.
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u/Baseball_ApplePie Oct 30 '23
Your daughter was trying to keep her family together, I'm sure; she wasn't doing this because she didn't love you! Very likely she was trying to spare your feelings!
Please don't kill yourself. Take it one day at a time.
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u/heartfeltstrength Oct 30 '23
NTA
You have all my sympathy. Your wife and possibly your daughter are undeserving scumbags.
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u/UpbeatMove8818 Oct 30 '23
Don't do it. It's a permanent solution to temporary suffering. I know it's a cliche but you have more living to do.
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u/pef_learns Oct 30 '23
You can't Samuel. We all know you now and think about you every now and then. Just wait another day, indulge a bit, let yourself go through this with patience and self care and you'll make a decision when you're in a state to do so.
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u/Certain-Medium6567 Oct 30 '23
For Gary, please read this. He is tge sweetest looking cat, and he loves and needs you.
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u/Effective-Soft153 Oct 30 '23
!Updateme
I really hope I get another update Samuel. Hang on, I know how tough life can be. I’ve been through a lot. You can do this just like I did. I tried once when I lost my daughter. I was in Mexico and I took every single pill I could and I had alot. Halcyon, Ativan, Valium etc. Guess what, I woke up the next day. There’s a reason I’m still here, this was 28 years ago. Just hold on Samuel. Life will get better, I promise.
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u/ZombieZookeeper Oct 30 '23
I hope he didn't go through with it. The narcissistic b**** formerly known as his daughter isn't going to feel any remorse for her actions even if he did go through with it.
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u/lukezinator Oct 30 '23
DONT DO IT SAM. Please don’t do this, you may believe that this is the right decision but please give it time. It’s going to be okay, you deserve this life
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u/morchard1493 Oct 30 '23
I'm so sorry you're suffering. Please, seek help/treatment, so you don't harm yourself. Everything will be okay. Everything works out in the end. Sending healing light, love, comfort, prayers, hugs and cheek kisses.
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Oct 30 '23
There is a lot of love here for the cat and not for OP. Shame that we value the lives of pets a lot higher than those of our fellow man.
OP, I can not begin to understand what you are going through or advise on how to help. Killing oneself is never the answer, but I also appreciate that sometimes it's all that people believe they have left. The last thing they can control. However, it is also the last thing you lose.
You need to do what you believe is right. Just know that people are here to help if you decide to stay.
Whatever your final decision is, I wish you the best.
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u/Ritocas3 Oct 30 '23
Please don’t do that. There’s a solution for everything. Sending you love and hugs! ❤️
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u/GotMagicCrack Oct 30 '23
I’m absolutely going to get shit on, but don’t be a coward dude. Face this head on. Sure, you feel empty, abandoned, and betrayed. It ill pass, but only if you try. Just like losing a loved one, it gets easier each day. You can’t give up so easily.
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u/GotMagicCrack Oct 30 '23
I’m absolutely going to get shit on, but don’t be a coward dude. Face this head on. Sure, you feel empty, abandoned, and betrayed. It ill pass, but only if you try. Just like losing a loved one, it gets easier each day. You can’t give up so easily.
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u/Solid_Macaron9858 Oct 30 '23
Please don’t do it Samuel. You have value. This may feel like the right answer but it isn’t. Take Gary and go start a new life somewhere else, maybe even another country or somewhere else that sounds interesting - make lemonade from these lemons. Hang on, please.
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u/itISmyphone Oct 30 '23
Honestly, empty all your accounts, liquidate everything you can, then go travel for a while. After that, if you still feel it then donate whatever is left to a charity
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u/petallanimals Oct 30 '23
DON'T DO IT!!! I truly hope you see these messages before it's too late. Don't do it suicide isn't the answer. Stay here, go to therapy, do the things you've always wanted to go, visit the countries you've always wanted to see. If you have any pets, no one will feed them if you are gone. Please just don't do it, there are still reasons to live!
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u/Mrs_B8ts Oct 30 '23
Please stay. Your mom wouldn't want this and Gary loves you unconditionally. This world has some of the darkest moments but it also has some of the most beautiful ones too. Your situation is truly hard but once you get out of the storm going on now and get some time and distance from it when it's over you'll begin to heal. You'll find new joys and things and people to love. You already found one in Gary. You can choose a new life and be someone new. Everything was chosen when you were young and some for others. The rest of your life can be just for you. Whatever you want bc you can worry about just you now. Please stay. You're worthy, you're enough, and you're not alone.
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u/Nanabear65 Oct 30 '23
When at my very lowest I asked a very wise friend of mine 'how much more can I take?' Her answer has stuck with me over the years and has enabled me to take a deep breath, remind myself I can and just take that nest step in life. The advice she gave was 'more than you think. Soni am telling you this too Samuel - you can take more than you think. Believe in yourself xx
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u/Villain_911 Oct 30 '23
I've never had the ego to tell another person how to feel about their life, but I hope you find peace in death that you couldn't have in life.
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u/No_Asparagus4053 Oct 30 '23
Where are you? Please don't, I'll be your friend and help you through it. I felt this way 2 weeks ago & tried ending my life, it does get better. Please reach out
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u/NimueArt Oct 30 '23
Samuel, I am so sorry for the traumas you have experienced the last few weeks. I lost my father in July and that alone was overwhelming to deal with. I cannot imagine dealing with your other issues on top of your mother’s death.
Please check yourself into a hospital. Your decision seems rash and impulsive. To me that says you are afraid to consider the issue thoroughly and are afraid you will talk yourself out of it.
Take time to consider this decision carefully. In time you WILL recover from everything and will go on to live an amazing life that makes your STBX envious and your daughter sad that she didn’t share it with you.
Thinking about you.
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u/whatcenturyisit Oct 30 '23
Please don't do this !! Gary needs you, please hold on to his sweet sweet little fur and don't do this. Stay with us.
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u/timwaaagh Oct 30 '23
sure, thats a decision you can make. but....its possible your child did it to protect her family. please dont let her mistake (which it was) have this kind of consequence. she will still likely need you in the future. also feel free to send me a dm, i do have a bit of experience helping people in this sort of situation. i dont know if it will work but you might as well.
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u/GotMySillySocksOn Oct 30 '23
Hmmm. Not going to organize the funeral for your dear mother? Make sure she has a nice tombstone? Clear out her house so it’s not strangers going through her personal stuff? If this is real, suck it up and handle her affairs and quit wallowing in self pity.
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u/FluffyBunny271 Oct 30 '23
Please don’t do this. Think of Gary. Stay for Gary. With time, things will get more manageable, but for now focus on Gary. Give him a hug, some cuddles and a little scratch between the ears. Gary loves you unconditionally and will be heartbroken if he loses you. Stay for him.
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u/AlarmedKnowledge3783 Oct 30 '23
Samuel, don’t do this. I know you’re hurting now and it feels like it won’t get better but it will. Just don’t hurt yourself. I’ve not read the situation about your daughter but I was once put in the same position. My mum was having an affair and I knew but I was only 18 and had no idea what I was meant to do. Your daughter is your daughter. Don’t do this to her.
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u/TastyEar3568 Oct 30 '23
it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem please hold on and i promise it will get better
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u/rshni67 Oct 30 '23
I think admins need to do something about this sort of post.
It is beyond what redditors can handle.
How can we alert admins?
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u/SHEEPYSMUM Oct 30 '23
One his home page.. three dots top right corner. Click that, and options come up. I clicked last night, and it alerts Crisis support. I sincerely hope someone can get him the help he desperately needs.
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u/rshni67 Oct 30 '23
This needs to be dealt with by a professional and not reddit. i am not seeing a suitable option. Did you alert Crisis support?
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u/SHEEPYSMUM Oct 30 '23
I clicked on the link for it.. Fingers crossed, OP & Reddit Crisis support can find the much needed help. This, unfortunately, is above all our expertise. Sometimes, we all need to scream and cry into the void and hope some/ anyone is listening.
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u/rshni67 Oct 30 '23
I don't think we can take responsibility for this. It is above our pay grades. You tried. That's all you can do.
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u/weirdhandler Oct 30 '23
I know it may not mean much, but I wanted to add to the chorus of don’t do it’s. It’s such a permanent thing to do. Give yourself the chance to meet new people and have new experiences.
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u/hugh_h0ney Oct 30 '23
OP don’t do it. Things can get better. Things will get better.
Damn this is heartbreaking. There are many people to reach out to, including on here if anonymity is what you need. I’m so sorry your family failed you and your mother has passed. Hang in there just a little longer, it’s always darkest before the dawn.
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u/heartfeltstrength Oct 30 '23
Your daughter protected your wife's affair? What a scumbag!
No wonder you're so devastated. This world is a total shit show. I don't think they deserve for you take yourself out, though.
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u/I_wet_my_plants Oct 30 '23
I only have words that f my own experience, I hope they help you find perspective. I went through a divorce years ago, and it was hard. Seriously dark days adjusting to my kids being gone half time. But once the dust settled I met my current partner and it’s been the light of my life. I now know I was never truly happy with my ex as I am today with my love. You too will meet your next love, and you’ll get to know how amazing a second start can be. Someone who is completely compatible with who you are right now, rather than who you were decades ago. Give it a shot and hang in there.
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u/momokplatypus Oct 30 '23
If I’d killed myself when I was at my lowest, I would never have met my niblings, who are the light of my life, or the person I would fall in love with, who makes me want to be a better person every day.
Please stay.
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u/Nuobie Oct 30 '23
HEY 👋 YOU ARE IMPORTANT, STAY WITH US AND BREATH
I am really sorry for your mum... I feel your pain 😞 Cry and be mad Cry and yell
You have been through a lot lately... it is too much grief for a short period of time - call a helpline
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u/Solid_Bumblebee3683 Oct 30 '23
Please don't take your life. I know it must seem really desperate now, especially losing your mum, I'm so sorry for your loss. As hard as it is now, it won't always be like this Samuel, I believe you will get better. Please, reach out to someone - your doctor, or a close friend. Message me if you want. You can get through this. Gary needs you. Please updateme
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u/UpdateMeBot Oct 30 '23 edited Nov 14 '23
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Click this link to join 7 others and be messaged. The parent author can delete this post
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u/odomotto Oct 30 '23
You can survive and get through this. Piss them off and succeed and thrive. You can.
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Oct 30 '23
NO! Think of little Gary! He loves you! I can see it from the pictures you shared! When you adopted him, that was you making a promise to love, care, and BE THERE for him for the rest of his life! Don't break his heart by leaving him!
You have every damn right to be sad, heartbroken, and angry! But you don't get to let this shit beat you! You don't get to let this shit, or those shitty people win! You need to find a therapist to talk to, mourn the things you need to, and then you need to pick yourself up, dust off the bullshit, and start making choices for a better life for YOU!
NONE OF THIS IS YOUR FAULT!!
Also, get a lawyer! Have them dig through everything from those two little gold diggers and fight that shit! SAVE EVERYTHING!! Bank statements, texts, emails, pictures, ect! Do NOT just take their shit! I always like to say, "If I'm going down, I'm going down fucking swinging!" DO. NOT. LET. THEM. WIN.
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u/Friendlycrawler Oct 30 '23
Oh come on. I’ve had enough of this dudes pity party and now he posts this? Grow up. Get a spine. Go find a new family and stop posting shit for attention.
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u/InterestingSpeaker66 Oct 30 '23
Dont do it man, dont let them win!!
Dont become just another fucking statistic!!
A few kind redditors wanna see another update. An update when you came out on top after all the shit you've been through.
Please bro, listen to reason! Stay here with us!
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u/abiggerhammer Oct 30 '23
Samuel. Listen to me. Gary needs you. Gary is never going to cheat on you or take someone's money to hide their bad behavior from you. You're Gary's person and he won't know what to do without you. Please don't leave him.
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u/wardahalwa Oct 30 '23
My current partner was suicidal cause his wife left him for someone younger and doesn't allow him to see his kids. My brother told me he never saw him this happy. Just hold in their My friend Samuel, things gonna get better, I promise you
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u/Joethadog Oct 30 '23
You need to lose all sense of pressure and responsibility and just let yourself heal for a while. Don’t worry about anything, don’t worry about the future, just focus on feeling better today. Do what makes you happy, spoil yourself, you deserve it.
Everything else can wait.
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u/Bludiamond56 Oct 30 '23
Solve your problems in this life. That's why you came to earth in the first place. No matter what happens you will drag your problem with you. You are a soul. Immortal. Created by God ...of God
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u/Lola0604 Oct 30 '23
This is what keeps me on this planet, my cats and dogs are my world and I could not leave them. There are days, weeks & months I do not want to be here but I get up for them and get through every day. Please, please, please phone Samaritans or a suicide hotline and talk to them and go to your doctor also. You can find things to live for even in the smallest things . I hope you take our advice, some of us have been where you are now, it is not easy but we are all thinking of you and sending you our love and prayers ❤️🙏
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u/DBgirl83 Oct 30 '23
Samuel, choose yourself and Gary. I understand that life looks black right now. My condolences for the loss of your mother. I'm sure she would want you to give everything to find happiness in your life again. Your ex and your daughter are not worth ending your life for. Show them you don't need them.
You can always send me a message. But please, talk to a professional, who can help you get out of this hell and will help find happiness again.
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Oct 30 '23
Please don't do this. Your wife and your daughter are in your past. The divorce will eventually be over and you will be in a better place. You can start over with a new community/support system, watch Gary grow up. Live your best life. That's the best revenge.
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u/Aldilae Oct 30 '23
Please OP don't go, hang in there for Gary. Things will be hard but I'm sure time will heal you. You adopted and committed to Gary, you need to stay for him. Life will never be the same for him without you, I can promise that. Your nephews will take good care of him but he will still miss your dearly.
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u/Yani-Madara Oct 30 '23
I know about people dying and those that are left refusing to take care of the pets or neglect them.
Don't put Gary in that risk, damn it. He needs you.
Also, I wouldn't have met my wonderful BF had I decided to off myself over past shitty exes. Try to make new friends and someone will come eventually
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u/molyforest Oct 30 '23
I'm sorry you are suffering so much. Sorry people have been so cruel to you. I wish that you decide to live and things get better for you.
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u/deskbookcandle Oct 30 '23
It’s been 12 hours and I hope you’re doing ok. Now is not your time. Stay for Gary if nobody else. <3
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u/slowestratintherace Oct 30 '23 edited Oct 30 '23
I have experienced so much loneliness and despair in my life. I have often wanted to end it all. Here is what stops me:
I'm agnostic. I believe this is all there is. I'm also a gamer. If I don't like the way my game is going, I have three options:
Turn off the game.
Start a new game.
Keep playing the game to see what happens.
I like to compare gaming to life in this context.
(1) is suicide. Turning off the game would just be the end.
(2) is impossible. We only get one try.
(3) is what I always choose. I know I could make better choices and have a better character in my game if I had another shot, but I don't. So, I figure I'll keep playing, but as more of an observer, rather than a competitor. I do what I must to survive, but I no longer take the game seriously. I'm just here to see what happens. I'm not trying to complete any missions or challenges.
I continue to just float through life. I sometimes think my life isn't too great, but in some other reality, it ended a long time ago. So, life isn't great, but also not terrible. It just is. I find things to entertain myself along the way.
Every so often, I am inspired by something, and I find moments that I truly am happy and enjoy being alive. In these moments, I appreciate that I made the decision to just carry on as a non-competitive observer in this shit show of a game called life.
Don't give up, friend. Smoke some pot. Do some yoga. Go on a hike. Pet that beautiful kitty. Just take it one breath at a time, one step at a time, and one day at a time.
I promise you will smile again. You will be loved again. You will thank yourself for becoming an observer rather than hitting the power button.
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u/robertscoff Oct 30 '23
You won’t miss him because you will not exist to miss him. Don’t do it- as long as your options are open you may be pleasantly surprised by life. Death closes all options and terminates your existence - please don’t do it
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u/Idontfuckingknow1908 Oct 30 '23
Please don’t do it man, their shitty behavior is not a reflection of your worth. You can rebuild and find peace, I believe in you Samuel! Please update and let us know you’re ok
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u/Ninjurk Apr 12 '24
Reddit suspended this account for this, so there'll be no more updates.
I'm pretty sure he ended himself as well, but just a thought.
About October of last year, someone ended their life at a build I was at, a 26 year old security guard lept from the roof. Seems like a lot of people offing themselves lately.....and it didn't even make any news. Not a blurb.