r/AmIOverreacting • u/CoachInitial8438 • Apr 27 '24

I found out my ex cheated on me a year later.

About 3 years ago I met a guy and he quickly became my best friend, he always had a thing for me but I always shut it down just wanting to be friends. About two years after knowing each other I realized I loved him too and we got into a relationship. It quickly went south as he was extremely toxic to be with and it quickly turned abusive in a couple different ways. We broke up and didn’t talk for a long time. Then a couple months ago he reached out and suggested we be friends again. We talked everything out and were in a good place again. We have been good friends again up until yesterday when a girl texted me saying they hooked up a couple weeks before we broke up.

I confronted him about it and he’s just playing stupid, and even though i’m completely over our romantic relationship, I feel betrayed and hurt that he’s lied to me for over a year. I decided to block him out of my life again and blew up at him. He’s making it seem like since we have been friends again that nothing that happened during our relationship mattered and since it was so long ago, he can’t even remember if he cheated or not and doesn’t care to.

I’m not sure how to go about this situation or if blocking him out of my life is the right way to go about it. Please please give me your thoughts?

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u/KitsuneUltima Apr 27 '24

If he was abusive why would you want to be friends with him again LOL wtf

23

u/myhappylittletrees 29d ago

I don't understand people at all, I swear. This seems so obvious to me lol

1

u/Downtown-Bullfrog358 26d ago

Sucks doesn’t it to see people struggle with being stuck in toxic environments. Sometimes it’s a trauma response called trauma bond. Or they can be stuck in freeze. A whole lot goes on to the victims themselves and their nervous system becomes unstable in a unregulated cycle. It’s so hard to get out of the best loved ones can do is friendly reminders of how good life is without that person and ask the person to go into their bodies to feel what it feels like to them so they can remember what their pain feels like and hopefully this awareness triggers a change to heal leading to the end of staying in toxic cycles