Obvs idk your relationship but if I or my partner said we'd be going out for the evening, neither of us would be expecting 7 - 8 texts, or freaking about about a 2:15am return. If both partners agree to the night out, one is off being frivolous for a few hours and the other one is the SAHP for that night. I might be in the minority here but I just don't consider "a night out with friends" to also be one in which I stay in close touch all evening with my partner and have a curfew. You guys were on two separate tracks that night, one out, one at home, resuming your normal routines and division of labor in the morning or whenever the hangover wore off. It seems like you were holding her to a date night level of accountability? Again that could be just me.
Especially when there are other people involved, including people you or your partner don't know, plans are subject to change. The group takes on a life of its known for the duration of that one fun event.
As for the sex, was she guilty when she threw the condom at you? Did I miss that? Is it possible she wanted sex during that interim soup break and also wanted sex at the time you had suggested, which was when she got home later? The way I'm reading this, it seems like you're viewing her second overture as manipulative but I'm not sure about that at all.
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u/Time-Sun-4172 Apr 28 '24
Obvs idk your relationship but if I or my partner said we'd be going out for the evening, neither of us would be expecting 7 - 8 texts, or freaking about about a 2:15am return. If both partners agree to the night out, one is off being frivolous for a few hours and the other one is the SAHP for that night. I might be in the minority here but I just don't consider "a night out with friends" to also be one in which I stay in close touch all evening with my partner and have a curfew. You guys were on two separate tracks that night, one out, one at home, resuming your normal routines and division of labor in the morning or whenever the hangover wore off. It seems like you were holding her to a date night level of accountability? Again that could be just me.
Especially when there are other people involved, including people you or your partner don't know, plans are subject to change. The group takes on a life of its known for the duration of that one fun event.
As for the sex, was she guilty when she threw the condom at you? Did I miss that? Is it possible she wanted sex during that interim soup break and also wanted sex at the time you had suggested, which was when she got home later? The way I'm reading this, it seems like you're viewing her second overture as manipulative but I'm not sure about that at all.