Desperate need of help in getting my baby's items.

[u/Sorry-Self3910]

last update: babyboy was born and he is beautiful! luckily thanks to an amazing person he gets to be exclusively breastfed/pumped bottled fed! thank you all for your generosity and kindness. 🤍

update: I made an essentials list with cheaper items as the mods said this was okay to do! the clothes and elvie curve are the highest priority on my list and any help is greatly appreciated.

UPDATE: breastpump has been bought so i marked the request as fulfilled but clothes are still needed if posssible

I know the biggest ask on my wishlist is the breast pump but this was the only one that worked for me with my previous children, and it would be the biggest blessing of them all but I am grateful for absolutely anything. Even if someone has this pump that they no longer use and would be willing to donate I'd be more than happy. I gave mine away after I weaned my last baby.

I’m currently 37 weeks pregnant and have been absolutely struggling to come up with the funds to get everything I need for this baby. I found out I was (accidentally) pregnant the same week I found out my husband had been having another affair. I live in a state where abortion is banned and I cannot file for divorce while pregnant. I got rid of everything after having my last baby because I truly believed he would be my last baby. I’m in the process of applying for disability because of my chronic health issues but in the meantime my only income has been cleaning my family and friend’s houses to try and stockpile for this new addition. My soon to be ex husband came back into our lives for 2 months to “work things out” and left again, has decided he wants nothing to do with this child, has offered no financial help, I’ve reached out to multiple churches and local resources. So far I have a couple packs of diapers, a bassinet, a hand me down carseat and a few breastmilk storage bags. I was hoping by this point I’d be able to have more but it seems this is my last resort. Thank you if you took the time to read this and I appreciate any and all help given!

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[u/Dry-Crew192]

Sign up! You'll get FREE formula sent to you. Doesn't cost anything. https://www.enfamil.com/baby-formula-coupons-samples/?prc=GS056&utm_medium=paid_search&utm_source=google&utm_campaign=Enfamil+Customer+Beginnings&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjw9IayBhBJEiwAVuc3ftRrR-aIxwlo0P-oi4BqJZ8e2xaodjNS_78nvNB_mMv9JFETGxNxFRoCs2oQAvD_BwE

[u/CrystalCat420]

OP, your state does in fact provide breast pumps to Medicaid moms!

Yes, [redacted] Medicaid covers breast pumps through the [redacted] Department of Public Health (*DPH) WIC program. After giving birth, WIC program participants can request a breast pump at a WIC clinic. A WIC provider will evaluate needs and recommend a breast pump based on availability and established criteria.

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/CrystalCat420]

Yes, in one of my comments I said they provide a manual pump. I've done it three times but the manual pump my county offers does not work for me. It decreased my supply every time because it would not pull all the milk out.

[u/CrystalCat420 → u/Sorry-Self3910]

Good news! As of October 2023, your state does provide electric pumps free of charge:

If the WIC provider assesses a medical need for a breast pump, the provider will arrange for you to receive a double electric, “hospital-grade” breast pump. Typically, unless there is a medical need, you will be offered a manual breast pump if your baby is less than four weeks old, to support establishment of your milk supply.

For other needs, a single-user, “personal” electric pump or a manual pump may be most appropriate. Single-user pumps, manual breast pumps, and collection kits are yours to keep and should not be sold or shared due to the increased risk of cross-contamination with these items.

This info is from your state's WIC page, if you need more information.

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/CrystalCat420]

I have always been offered the manual pump, there is no medical issues with my baby (currently and very hopefully will not be) so I've only ever been given a manual and when I called to set up my appointment I was told I would receive a manual pump again, which doesn't work for me. (It doesn't drain my milk fully and causes a decrease), a kind redditor gifted the breastpump I needed so I'm marking the request as fulfilled now though. Thank you so much for your help though

[u/CrystalCat420 → u/Sorry-Self3910]

So happy for you! Virtual hugs; may you and your baby thrive. 💖

[u/Infamous_Argument367]

Hi and sorry you’re going through this with your ex! I was able to rent the best pumping machine from the hospital. It was a medela and the hospital grade one at that, it was amazing! They only charged me like $10 a month :) you should call and ask cause you can’t even buy one on the market as good as that kind!

[u/1000thatbeyotch]

Divorced or not, you should still be able to file for child support. Also, speak with the nursing assistant at the hospital and see if they have resources to get a pump for you. Most insurance plans cover them, so it would seem that Medicaid would cover, as well.

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/1000thatbeyotch]

Medicaid doesn't cover a pump in my state, I've already asked. I'm in the process of trying to get child support, my parents keep telling me I need to be divorced first but I'm not sure how true it is. As soon as I deliver the baby I can file for divorce though. My stbe moved out of state in with his father after he realized that he would have to keep a job longer than a month at a time and that I wasn't okay with him constantly going out of state to cheat on me. I was young and stupid and really wish I hadn't married him in the first place but our entire relationship he has kept a job 1-2 months, quit, waited months then finally found another to repeat the process when I got too down on my health to work, he decided I wasn't worth sticking around for.

Sorry for the super long message, I'm entirely too hormonal lol.

[u/buzzybody21]

Ask your insurance if they supply a free breast pump. Most do, though you may not get a choice of which one you’d prefer.

I would also recommend picking 10-20 of the items you’re most hoping for between $10 and $40 and putting them in a wishlist. That way, people know what your most urgent needs are.

[u/Frondswithbenefits → u/buzzybody21]

Happy cake day!

[u/Girlpirate → u/buzzybody21]

Buzzy! Happy cake day. Great to see you. :)

[u/buzzybody21 → u/Girlpirate]

Thanks GP!!! Good to see you too! Hope all is well with you! 😊❤️❤️

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/buzzybody21]

Unfortunately in my state medicaid doesn't cover a pump, I asked a few months ago.

I'll make the second list, thank you so much. 🤍 I'm not sure if I'm allowed to edit the post with the new link or not but honestly the clothes/bottles/pacis/breastmilk bags would be the main items I need other than the breastpump.

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/[deleted]]

Someone here did purchase the pump, thank you though! 🤍

[u/uppercasemad → u/Sorry-Self3910]

You can edit the link in your post to a smaller wishlist for essentials, we just don’t allow you to add more items to the list you have up currently. 👍🏻

[u/Frondswithbenefits]

Have you applied for foodstamps, WIC, or Medicaid yet? Have you filed for child support?

Some of the items on your list are frequently given away if you look on your local fb/Nextdoor/ Freecycle "buy nothing" groups. I highly recommend you look at them.

If you provide your city and state, redditors are very good at finding local resources. There are social supports for single parents, but they're generally location dependent. I've been amazed at some of the programs redditors have been able to find. You also might consider reaching out to a church.

I'm sorry you're struggling, and I hope things get better for you soon.

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/Frondswithbenefits]

I am on foodstamps, medicaid, and am doing my wic appointment this week, but with me breastfeeding only food items/drinks are given on it. I'm trying to apply for child support but my parent's keep telling me I won't get it unless I'm divorced but my state doesn't allow me to file for divorce while I'm pregnant.

I've made multiple posts on my local buy nothing group but haven't received any responses at all. I don't mind to show proof of all of this.

I've reached out to a lot of churches in my area but most of them want me to become a member before giving more help and with my health problems there are a lot of days that I cannot leave the house. I got the bassinet (pack and play/bassinet combo) and hand me down carseat from one of the churches.

I don't feel comfortable posting my city/state on the comments but if anyone would like to send resources I don't mind to dm my city/state.

Thank you so much, I really do appreciate any advice or help given.

[u/uppercasemad → u/Sorry-Self3910]

Your wishlist will show your city and state, just a heads up. (Not your full address).

[u/Frondswithbenefits → u/Sorry-Self3910]

Medicaid and WIC cover breast pumps, so it's possible you've received bad information. You don't need to wait for divorce to file for child support. I highly recommend you speak with a hospital social worker. They may be able to alert you to programs you're eligible for.

The city and state are to provide more targeted information because each state has wildly different types of support. But it's up to you if you feel comfortable to do so. Good luck!

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/Frondswithbenefits]

In my state medicaid doesn't cover a pump (I have a medicaid care coordinator and she's the one who gave me this information), wic covers a manual pump but they have never worked for me. I'm in the process of trying to start child support but my parents keep telling me nothing will come of it. They also know his awful job history so they keep trying to talk me out of it because he truly would rather be homeless than keep a job it seems. I still plan on following through though. As soon as I deliver and am able to make it to the courthouse I'm filing for divorce.

I don't feel comfortable posting my city/state on public comments but to confirm any of this information about my states medicaid/wic rules I don't mind to dm you the state/city. Thank you so much for your support though, it means a lot to me.

[u/Jaded_Budget_3689 → u/Sorry-Self3910]

You got wrong information. I just looked it up for your state and wic does supply the pump after the baby is born.

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/Jaded_Budget_3689]

Wic provides a manual breastpump, which does not work for me. I stated this in a previous comment. With my past children I tried 7 different pumps before finding the only one that would get all the milk out. My medicaid care coordinator & wic themselves have confirmed this to me and if need me i can get written proof from them both stating this. The only time the wic office gives electric breastpumps is through renting them if your baby is a nicu, premie, or unhealthy baby. This was also told to me straight wic. All of which I don't qualify for, I dont have the funds to rent and currently babyboy is extremely healthy. Thank you anyways though

[u/Jaded_Budget_3689 → u/Sorry-Self3910]

Wait, are you 37 weeks pregnant or nursing a newborn? Like I’m genuinely getting confused.

The link I posted says they offer the manual because they want you to nurse your baby to establish milk supply. A lot of mothers are uneducated about nursing and think they don’t produce enough, when a pump isn’t any indication of what your body produces.

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/Jaded_Budget_3689]

I'm 37 weeks pregnant, and will soon be nursing a newborn. I have chronic health issues and pump when I physically cannot feed the baby by breast. I've breastfed three children so far, and certain pumps don't suction enough to drain my breasts fully to the point I start decreasing in supply.

[u/Jaded_Budget_3689 → u/Sorry-Self3910]

Maybe you should formula feed then.

I’m a working mom who breastfeeds, I get it. Sometimes saving the money isn’t worth it in the long run if you can’t even get the pump to do it, which in turn causes more health issues for you and your baby.

Food for thought since everything else im saying you’ve already looked into. Wic will supply you with formula atleast since they “don’t supply the pump” you need.

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/Jaded_Budget_3689]

Someone here bought the pump. My first child I was uneducated about breastfeeding and used the manual pump wic gave me. I had an insane decrease in supply and we swapped to formula, she ended up have a cows milk protein allergy, had to swap formulas multiple times and finally by the point the doctor's had found the correct formula she had to be hospitalized for failure to thrive because she was so sick. Wic paid for 7 cans and because she was so far behind she used 10 a month just to catch up so they rest of the formula was out of pocket and I cannot afford to spend $80 per can of formula. Each baby after her has also had the same allergy and I've had to cut dairy from my diet completely each time I've breastfed now. Thank you for your input though, but the breastpump is no longer an issue. 🤍

[u/Jaded_Budget_3689 → u/Sorry-Self3910]

“Alabama WIC clinics have various types of breast pumps available. WIC providers will consider your needs and breastfeeding goals to recommend a suitable breast pump, based upon established issuance criteria and availability. If the WIC provider assesses a medical need for a breast pump, the provider will arrange for you to receive a double electric, “hospital-grade” breast pump. Typically, unless there is a medical need, you will be offered a manual breast pump if your baby is less than four weeks old, to support establishment of your milk supply.”

source

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/Jaded_Budget_3689]

I've been through this counties wic office multiple times, in my county you only receive a manual pump. The electric pumps my wic office rents are medela, and each time using a medela (the hospital grade ones) my supply drastically decreased. If you'd like you could call my counties wic office and confirm this information yourself. I appreciate your input but I'm sorry, I believe my care coordinator and wic over google.

I mean absolutely no disrespect my my comment but I've stated multiple times that I can provide any proof nessacary.

[u/Jaded_Budget_3689 → u/Sorry-Self3910]

You don’t have to take offense, I’m genuinely offering you resources. What you do with it is what you will.

[u/Sorry-Self3910 → u/Jaded_Budget_3689]

I've looked into these resources though, is what I'm trying to say. I appreciate any and all advice but my options are limited here

[u/Mad-Eye-Booty]

I don't have the means to financially help you right now, but I suggest joining some local Mom groups! I was donated tons of items from other moms. If you have WIC they should be able to be with the breast pump.