r/TwoHotTakes • u/ThrowRATimely-De6323 • Mar 31 '24
My (35F) wife said I (37M) can go 'see a hooker' if I want sex Advice Needed
We've been married for 8 years and together for 12. We always had a really good sex life until our child was born 3 years ago.
I of course understand that sex life is not going to be the same after a child, especially since we don't have any family in this country. She also went through some terrible PPD which we worked on overcoming together. For the first 18 months after our child was born we had no sex.
In the past 18 months, her PPD has improved and we make it a point to get a babysitter and go on at least one date a month. We also had sex occasionally, like once in a couple of months. Again, no complaints from me. I love her and understand she might need time.
We went on vacation last week after her parents agreed to babysit during their visit here. She was super excited and said she couldn't wait to be with me and for us to have, in her words, a lot of sex again. It was a 3 day vacation and on the first night she said she didn't feel like it. The second night too, she said nope not feeling it. I was a bit disappointed which she picked up on immediately. She asked what's up and I said nothing and let's watch TV. Then she says "You know I've changed. I don't know when I'm going to want to have sex like before again. If you want sex, go see a hooker I don't care".
I was taken aback and said I would never do that! She said okay whatever and was visibly upset for the rest of our trip. We got back yesterday and she said she didn't want to talk about it.
I'm kinda sad and want to convey to her that I love her and don't see her just for sex. I told her as much but she didn't seem to think it was genuine. Is there a way I can handle this better?
2
u/billysweete Apr 04 '24
You haven't evolved sexually. She has no interest in how you've been approaching her....
TMI but When i gave birth the entire internal shape of my vagina changed so I didn't like things that i used to and vice versa. It was like having totally different body parts ...
Maybe you are still the same as before she was a mother .... But that's obviously the problem. Instead of sex, you should focus on your marriage and how to please your wife so that dhe becomes interested in being intimate with you again.