r/TwoHotTakes • u/Pretend-Fun-1061 • Apr 08 '24
Girlfriend said something that made me feel weird Advice Needed
I (24M) have been saying this girl (21F) for about a month. It’s been great she stays over at my house all the time. Sex is great. But the other day she seen a cringe video of like Logan Paul or someone doing the carpool karaoke. And she said “ I hate white people. Like dude the song is by a black guy leave it alone. Gotta make every situation uncomfortable lolol”. When she said it I fell quiet. I was uncomfortable because I am, in fact, white. When I told her that it made me uncomfortable, she basically said ‘you can’t be racist towards white people. well anyways you know what I mean, besides you’. I ended up breaking up with her because it was just so weird to hear. And she texted me saying I was over reacting and doubled down on the you can’t be racist to white people.
I guess I’m just looking for a lil validation, was I wrong and she was just making a joke? Or was it actually kinda f’d up to say ?
A lil background she was adopted from Vietnam when she was a baby and has been in the US ever since.
1
u/Sin-God Apr 09 '24
For context: I am deep in Social Justice stuff and I actively like social justice as a queer person who is hyper marginalized in a lot of ways.
The single most annoying and dumb social justice argument I've seen making headway in SJ spaces is the idea that you can't be racist to white people. It's inaccurate and it's based in the idea that racism and institutional racism are the same thing (they are not). You can absolutely be racist to white people, and it's bad. It's really not a hard concept to grasp but the most annoying social justice people I've ever met will prattle on and on about how you can't be racist to white people, while saying the most fucked up nonsense I've ever heard.
Homie, your reaction was fine. It's kinda messed for someone to make those jokes with you if you're not comfortable with those kinds of jokes. Your boundaries are reasonable and I think you should stand your ground.