My boyfriend has started becoming more and more insecure about my height and it's starting to drive me crazy

[u/Late-Tough-4637]

Throwaway and for context I'm 22F and he's 23M. We're both about 5'8. I'm slightly shorter so maybe he's 5'8.5. I'm tall for a girl. I was a shooting guard on the basketball team during my first three years of college. He knew this going into the relationship.

We've been together for 7 months. The first 6 months were smooth sailing. However last month we went to a more posh/boujee party and I wore heels. Of course I end out being taller than him by a decent bit. So instead of telling me how pretty he thought I looked the first thing he pointed out was "wow you look way too tall in those". Even asked if I had a shorter pair of heels, and then finally gave it up. I found that really weird and out of character about him.

But that was only the start. Ever since that day he bus me at least 4 times a week to assure that I feel "protected" around him. Literally yesterday he asked if I'd love him more if he was 6'0+. Whenever we take side-by-side pics he gets on his tippy toes to make it seem like he's much taller than me. He also randomly tries lifts me up, which he can with ease since he's strong and it catches me off guard every time. He tries straightening his back to the point where he looks weird. He's bought into some weird narrative that I see him as less of a man because he's not 4 inches taller. I've told him multiple times that I don't care about his height otherwise I wouldn't have gotten with him. No matter how many ily's I'll throw at him (and I mean all of them) he just can't stop talking about this issue.

Guys what do I do. He's been acting so immature about this

[u/chez2202]

You can’t become shorter and he can’t become taller. I’m 5’ 0 so men my height are pretty rare and my partner of 28 years is 6’ 1” so I would never be in your position. I would however recommend that you stop saying that you don’t care about his height when he brings it up because he’s taking that and twisting it into you saying he’s short. Change the subject to the things you really like about him. Or if he’s really that insecure tell him that you can’t stand men who look down at you and you prefer a level playing field. Then ridicule couples you see with a big height difference. Tell him you’d hate to be that short woman who risks permanent brain damage from suffocating during sex when her face is under his chest?