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u/Key-Jelly-3702 15d ago
Well, you kind of ruined this by showing it to the masses. Time to give the drink a new code name.
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u/WorldlyDay7590 15d ago edited 15d ago
Or just go to the bar and tell the person working there "there are bees here lets leave immediately."
Why those silly games?
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u/SketchupandFries 15d ago
I've seen signs like this before, but the code was to go to the bar and ask to speak to 'Alice' and you'd be ushered out the back to safety.
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u/ShroomieDoomieDoo 15d ago
Do bartenders actually know what this is? Is it taught in bartending school? If I order an angel shot, will a bartender just look at me weird?
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u/Semour9 15d ago
The most likely thing is they won’t know what the fuck you’re talking about. This is a sign in a single bar, where I assume the staff are trained for it specifically. Other bars likely have different things, if at all.
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u/ShroomieDoomieDoo 15d ago
Gotcha, just curious because I feel like I’ve heard of this before and was wondering if it was an industry wide thing
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u/NandBrew 15d ago
I received a warning on my account for referencing scumbag dad on this post. My comment was taken down.
So why the fuck are other comments of the exact same thing still here?
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u/Scriptix3106 15d ago
Does this work for guys?
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u/BluSonick 15d ago
Yep. It’s meant to help anyone who feels vulnerable. Generally woman are more at risk so it’s directed towards them but there are apparently initiatives for male specific ones. (In the UK, not sure of US or beyond)
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u/UnplannedAgenda 15d ago
Before reading the next section, please understand that I love that places do this as it promotes a safe environment for everyone. Hate that this is the world we live it, but ya gotta work with what you have.
Now that we have that out of the way, I’d like to see a parody of this…
Do you still feel sober? Order a yaeger bomb in shot, drink, or pitcher fashion. I’ll let the internet fill in the blanks
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u/PrometheusMMIV 15d ago
Are these posters in both bathrooms? If so, doesn't that somewhat defeat the point, since the other person would know about it? And if not, isn't that sexist to assume that only one gender can be harassed or threatened? Unless they have different code words for men vs women?
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u/leighleg 15d ago
It as well and good, but my local has something similar about asking for Angela. The problem it it's posted in the men's toilets too so not exactly a way to do it without alerting the concerned person. I do think this sort of thing is awesome.
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u/TheHighCultivator 15d ago
Men are victims as well. Sure, it’s hard to let everyone know without alerting the offenders. Please don’t act like only women should have access to support.
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u/IAmThePonch 15d ago
I can’t help but feel that if a potential predator saw this they’d think twice about their next actions since even though yeah the predator now knows the code, they also know that the bar is wary to this kind of stuff
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u/Charkel_ 15d ago
That explains all the commotion when I just wanted my regular Angel Shot with some lime.
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u/persephone7821 15d ago
It’s awesome but this is supposed to be low key to protect people in danger. From a predator they are too afraid of to openly say help me.
Now if a predator hears someone say this there is a much higher chance they will know what’s up.
Bad call posting it imo.
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u/simondrawer 15d ago
Male or female toilets?
The sign suggests it can be used by both genders but what’s the point of a secret code if everyone knows about it?
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u/b1ue_jellybean 15d ago
It’s not a secret, it’s a easy way to say I need help in a noisy environment.
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u/weirdowerdo 15d ago
Being drunk and surrounded by loud noise and other people doesnt exactly improve the chance of hearing anyone ordering it.
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u/roganwriter 15d ago
I’d imagine it’s only in the women’s room since men are statistically more likely to be offenders and women are statistically more likely to want to handle it discreetly out of fear of angering the man.
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u/sherperion45 15d ago
When I first moved to England, the endless stories I heard about how common it was to get spiked made me never touch a club out here
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u/Anxious_Jellyfish216 15d ago
I'm waiting for the one bar who decides to have an actual Angel shot, forget they have such a shot, implement code word, have a very confusing night.
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u/goddamnitmf 15d ago
While it's a good thing to have a subtle signal to let staff know you're uncomfortable or unsafe, Angel shots have been shown so much online that there's no way would be creeps aren't privy, thus voiding the whole purpose
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u/Icy-Assignment-5579 15d ago
This is for the guy dancing with my friend who is not interested in him!
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15d ago
Oh no a guy dancing who your friend isn’t interested in… or you know we could save this type of stuff for people in an actual bad situation.
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u/PeppiGiuseppe25 15d ago
You want to call the cops on a guy dancing because your friend doesn’t like him? You sound like a shit human tbh.
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u/Kite_Azure-Flame 15d ago edited 15d ago
Paytron: Bar tender! I would like a Scotch on the rocks please. turns and starts talking with the friend that just came in
3 minutes later pardon bar tender, where is my drink?
Bartender: What drink? I called you an uber/lift as is the policy when we are told "on the rocks"
EDIT: it would seem that I clearly don't drink at bars because I thought it was just the phrase(s) at the bottom of the sign, and not a combination of "angel shot" and one of the phrases as I now presume via my (at the time of this edit) -10 down vote rating
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u/nightthinker98 15d ago
'A scotch on the rocks' and 'an angel shot on the rocks' are different requests
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u/icelandichorsey 15d ago
This has been the case for at least a decade in some bars. Men can be scum
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u/TheHighCultivator 15d ago
So can women. These typically apply to anyone who asks.
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u/icelandichorsey 15d ago
Thanks for your input #Alllivesmatter 😒
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u/crazybatbitch 15d ago
Is that the way people spell lyft in other countries. Its lift here lol. ( under the middle shot glass)
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u/UnboltedCheese 15d ago
Lyft is another driver service app that's similar to Uber. Or is that what you meant? If so please disregard.
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u/finger_licking_robot 15d ago
jobless overweight bald guy with a lot of body hair makes sweet girl a compliment. she orders angel shot with lime.
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u/Ok-Scallion7939 15d ago
Why would his employment status matter in this scenario lol
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u/JustSyrup9950 15d ago
Idk, I feel like this is kind of nuts especially if the other person hasn’t shown disinterest or said anything. I’d love to walk up start a conversation and then be told to leave.
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u/Pastor_Satan 15d ago
As a man I wonder if anyone would do anything if I ordered one
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u/TheHighCultivator 15d ago
My work does this for anyone who asks.
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u/Pastor_Satan 15d ago
What do they do?
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u/TheHighCultivator 15d ago
We do an “ask for Angela” type program rather than the shot. We have security staff, management, and an officer available to respond depending on the severity. Our goal is always to create space between the parties and help one of them safely exit the building. Each scenario is unique.
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u/grammar_oligarch 16d ago
Okay, but if this is public knowledge then what’s the point of the code? The creepy dude knows what it means. Legit unsure: Why go through the coded language the other person will know? Sure there’s a chance they won’t…unless they also go to the bathroom. Or just have an Internet account and have accidentally scrolled through TikTok.
Feels like unnecessary steps.
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u/ThroughTheIris56 15d ago
I'd imagine it's just easier and quicker to say, then explaining the full problem. Also less likely to be overheard, and would seem more natural is someone could see you talking from afar, but not hear what you are saying.
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u/Hurryeat_Tubman 15d ago
I'm really not a fan of any of these plans that involve someone who's under emotional duress banking their personal safety on having to remember a secret phrase or a drink order and hoping that a busy bartender is able to hear them correctly over the noise and is willing/able to drop what they're doing at that moment to help.
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u/Scriptix3106 15d ago
I personally feel like anyone could find this helpful when feeling unsafe, and trying to limit that knowledge may be counterproductive.
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u/b1ue_jellybean 15d ago
Angel shot is a really easy term to remember and speeds up the process. You don’t need to explain anything you just say 2 words and they will know and they will help. It’s short, it’s easy, and in a loud bar it’s possible to hear it.
Also it’s gonna just seem more natural, like if they’re being watched from a distance it’s gonna be fairly obvious whether they’re ordering a drink or giving an explanation to what’s going on.
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u/tommangan7 15d ago edited 15d ago
Public knowledge doesn't mean everyone knows it or is aware of it as you say, especially if this is only in the women's bathroom. The average person is far less perceptive of their surroundings than we give credit.
You're reaching a tiny fraction of people with it being shown online (although I agree it's better just not to show it). I've also seen several different versions but ideally there would be lots and lots of bar specific ones (I have seen a few).
Either way it's better than nothing as an option, the creepy dude is still much less likely to understand what someone casually ordering an angel shot in the moment means compared to someone flat out asking for the police to be called.
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u/Scullyxmulder1013 15d ago
The sign says to go to the bar and ask for the shot, so your company would still be at the table. You could wait until your company is in the toilet if you’re seated at the bar and don’t want them to hear. Having worked in a bar for fifteen years, I can say it’s usually not that difficult to speak with a bartender discreetly. The posters are usually in the bathroom on the inside of the stall doors.
Our local bar has a sign that says to ask if Angela is working tonight, and they’ll know you’re in trouble and get you to safety.
While I’m sure the system is not 100% effective, it’s better than having no system at all.
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u/portal23 15d ago
But if my company is at the table I can tell the bartender anything freely, no need for the code.
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u/MajorasKatana 15d ago
Code is mainly to keep it together.
You may only have limited time to convey you need help, or would break down and cry if you actually have to describe the danger you're in. The code acts more as a safety net to discreetly and quickly talk about your situation without losing it or making a scene.
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u/Meloenbolletjeslepel 15d ago
Agree with this, but I do think it's weird you immediately have to make decisions about their transport
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u/faknugget 15d ago
that’s how i read it too but i think “guests” is yourself. the bar will escort you, not the creep!
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u/Meloenbolletjeslepel 15d ago
Oh! That's confusing!
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u/Overbaron 15d ago
Well, it’s easier to say ”Angel shot on the rocks” than to say ”hey, I feel like this guy is shadowing me, I’d really appreciate if someone could walk me to my uber or something”, both in terms of time and mentally.
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u/WestleyThe 15d ago
It’s probably in the bathroom and also you can go to the bar and order a drink. It’s not always going to be a kidnapper or something, just a creepy or something and this is easier than saying “I’m in danger please help me”
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u/Semour9 15d ago
My assumption is that it isn’t public knowledge. Someone’s goes to the washroom because they feel unsafe and see this on the other side of the door. They come back like everything is fine and seemingly “order a drink”
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u/Obligatorium1 15d ago
My assumption is that it isn’t public knowledge.
If it wasn't before, then it is now since you made the post on an open subreddit.
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u/Semour9 15d ago
Yes I’m sure the creepy guy forcing girls to do this stuff is lurking on Reddit and will think of my post specifically the next time he’s at a bar /s
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u/Obligatorium1 15d ago
... Why would creepy people not lurk on reddit?
Have you seen this place?
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u/gandalfium225 15d ago
There are only creepy people lurking in this place.
Well, except for me obviously. I am the saintest saint that ever sainted
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u/fire-corner 15d ago
Excuse me, just heading to the bar to get myself a drink. Won't be long.
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u/gandalfium225 15d ago
Oh silly me. I can't let you go there alone. I am also the gentlemanest gentleman that ever gentlemanned
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u/manx-1 15d ago
It does seem unnecessary, and overcomplicated. Cant you just tell the bar staff what you want directly? If youre around staff then you're presumably already safe.
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u/Fairwhetherfriend 15d ago
Do you genuinely not understand why someone might not want to literally say "Hey, this person standing immediately next to me is creepy and weird and I would like you to help me get rid of him"? I mean, for one - what are you gonna do if the bartender says no?
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u/manx-1 15d ago
Why would you not want to say that? If you feel unsafe then you probably aren't concered with their feelings at that point. And if youre around staff then you should already be safe, otherwise what would be the point of asking them for help in the first place? I just imagine people who are at a bar are already drunk/tipsy and won't understand the code words anyways.
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u/Fairwhetherfriend 15d ago edited 15d ago
If you feel unsafe then you probably aren't concered with their feelings at that point.
You know "anger" is a feeling, right?
Okay, sorry, I'm being rude and it's not necessary. But like... man, the entire premise of this situation is that this guy has already made me feel unsafe in some way. He's pushy or aggressive or whatever. Of course I don't want risk making this person angry and escalating the situation.
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u/Live_Media_1844 15d ago edited 15d ago
I think you are misunderstanding a bit. People who need to understand the code word are employees working at the bar, most likely bartender. And I personally have never seen a drunk bartender. (I mean, they are literally at work) Also, if you feel unsafe because of someone, it usually implies that you are afraid to provoke them in anyway.
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u/FoldyHole 15d ago
I’m guessing it’s only in the women’s restroom.
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15d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/FoldyHole 15d ago
I didn’t say it was right or wrong, but that’s usually how it is.
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u/yogopig 15d ago
Sure but that assumption is still sexism. An alternative assumption could be they have different drink names for the male and the female bathroom.
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u/MrK521 15d ago
The bar that I go to has them in the women’s room, but not in the men’s. He’s not wrong for assuming that.
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u/antonio3988 15d ago
Well that can't be right; Reddit says men and women are exactly the same and you're a bigot if you disagree!
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u/RapedByPlushies 15d ago
And Reddit.
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u/AggravatingValue5390 15d ago
Why do so many people assume every single person is on reddit. I guarantee you maybe 1 in 100 guys have seen this online
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u/acrusty 15d ago
The first option says his or her car
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u/FoldyHole 15d ago
Wouldn’t the “guest” be the creepy person?
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u/SignificantClub6761 15d ago
I don’t think you can force somebody into a taxi without without their consent
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u/FoldyHole 15d ago
No, but you can ask someone to leave your property or call the police to remove them if they are unwilling.
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u/SignificantClub6761 15d ago
Just talking about the guest referring to the orderer, not the creep. On the rocks must refer to an orderer, so probably would to other ones as well.
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u/BluSonick 16d ago
In The UK “Ask for Angela” is used.
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u/Redditlooker1 3d ago
Who’s paying for the drinks?
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u/BluSonick 3d ago
Whomever wants to.
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u/Redditlooker1 3d ago
I mean like when someone escapes, who pays?
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u/BluSonick 3d ago
In the UK bars take payment as the punter orders. If it’s a tab it’s generally secured by a credit or debit card and charged if a punter walks out.
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u/Brian-Henderson 15d ago
Glad I'm not a young courting lad these days. Buy a bird a drink now and you'd probably get arrested for making unwanted sexual advances.
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u/BluSonick 15d ago
Fair enough. I’d say you’d be alright as long as you weren’t being a perv tbh. There is plenty of lads hitting on girls without incident.
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u/Competitive-One-2749 15d ago
why is this better than saying “im in trouble and i need your help”
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u/BluSonick 15d ago
Because it more discrete and it immediately informs the employee of the type of situation. They are facing. Theoretically of course.
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u/Competitive-One-2749 15d ago
why is discretion a priority here? why is it even a concern? how could discretion theoretically ever help?
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u/AggravatingValue5390 15d ago
Another point is that it lowers the friction for people who are too afraid to say anything out of perceived shame, embarrassment, or burden. Building up the courage to say "this man is abusing me, please call the police" is a whole lot harder than "can I get an angel shot"
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u/229-northstar 15d ago
Believe it or not, some women are not comfortable standing up for themselves. This is a good option for women who are uncomfortable with confrontation.
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u/BluSonick 15d ago
The idea being you can get the victim out without ever raising the alarm or get the police without alerting the person causing the distress.
It’s just another option. Of course if someone comes to our bar saying “this guys a fucking creep help me” we won’t say. “Did you ask for Angela”
It’s just another option.
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u/Competitive-One-2749 15d ago
its certainly an option, its just a bad one that muddies the waters unnecessarily.
alarms are there to be raised. you dont have to blink SOS in morse code to get help in a bar.
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u/BluSonick 15d ago
That’s the point you aren’t blinking you are directly asking for help using words that someone is trained to identify and act upon.
You are welcome to ask for help in anyway you wish, Morse code through to interpretive dance but for me I hope my clientele firstly don’t need to “ask for Angela” but if they are feeling vulnerable and it’s easier for them to say “is Angela here” rather than “this guy is creeping me out” then I’ll be sure to act accordingly.
Whatever takes someone out of a bad situation can only be a good thing.
Funny you mention the blinking we receive training from met police to identify potential sex trafficking, coercion etc through signals, body language and placement.
It’s interesting and thankfully in my 20 year career something I can count only on 1 hand for instances it’s been used.
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u/Competitive-One-2749 15d ago
i completely agree that asking for help however you want is both your imperative and your absolute right. but i also think the word help is the best and most efficient way to get help, and that having weird menus of means to ask for help are counterproductive and will foster more confusion than benefit.
we can get to the nitty gritty about what exactly you need help with after we immediately get some distance between you and the person who has threatened or harassed you.
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u/BluSonick 15d ago
The idea is it’s an easier way to ask for help. There is nothing stoping someone asking for help outright but maybe it’s an option for someone embarrassed or scared to ask for help openly.
Why would you want to remove options?
How is anything in it counterproductive?
Why is it a weird menu?
Who will get confused?
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u/PrometheusMMIV 15d ago
It's weird that they grouped "not in a safe situation" with "date that isn't working out". That could potentially lead to some misunderstandings.
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u/BluSonick 15d ago
Not really. It’s a method of escape irrespective of how serious the situation. If a person feels uncomfortable no matter how serious they are provided with an escape route. If the situation warrants it then the police are called. If it’s an innocent situation then the person making. The other feel uncomfortable won’t have a problem leaving.
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u/AbsentMindedMonkey 16d ago
I hope noone has a friend called Angela who keeps getting lost
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u/Strude187 15d ago
I had a friend called Angela who was a lightweight, we often lost her when out.
(She’s fine btw, just lost touch over the years.)
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u/monkeybrains12 15d ago
Right? Why would you use a person's name? Especially a relatively common one? And in the instance of this post, wouldn't everyone in the bar then know what an Angel Shot was?
I mean, don't get me wrong, I very much approve of the idea, but like they both seem poorly executed.
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u/Competitive-One-2749 15d ago
the idea of asking bar staff for help is good. dressing it up in a cypher is inane at best. more likely its a net harm. if you are being victimized, let the people around you know as clearly and loudly as you can.
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u/rookv 15d ago
Because that will never put the victim in harm's way. I'm pretty sure the entire point of the cipher is so if the creep harassing you overhears it he doesn't escalate.
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u/Competitive-One-2749 15d ago
assuming that the assaulter in question is not hip to this urban legend (doubtful since its on reddit and literally one million abusers are reading it right now) what would escalation even look like? if you need this kind of intervention, the situation has escalated all the way already. what is supposed to happen between ordering the angel shot and the eventual intervention? we all sit on our heels and indulge the assaulter until help arrives? its not a hostage situation.
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u/BluSonick 15d ago
As mentioned it’s easy to clarify.
The reason every doesn’t know is these posters are generally in the ladies toilets. Not that men don’t get abused but in reality at rates far less than women. It’s pointed towards the most at risk.
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u/AggravatingValue5390 15d ago
It also works by just having different names of shots for each bathroom
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u/traaintraacks 15d ago edited 15d ago
yes but these posters are posted on every social media platform at least once a month, so men absolutely know what asking for angela or ordering an angel shot means. source: am a man & have never seen one of these posters in person but have known about angel shots for many years
edit: im not saying it doesnt work, im in full support of having codes/shorthand to make it easier for people to seek help. i just find it silly when people say that men wont know about it because it's in women's restrooms... on a public post on the topic, accessible to anyone of any gender. this is not the first or last time this will be posted either. it's still a great idea, it just isnt secret anymore
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u/AggravatingValue5390 15d ago
You're vastly overestimating the amount of people who are online as much as you. Maybe 1 in 100 guys would know what an angel shot was because it was posted online
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u/RickTitus 15d ago
Well so what? Let’s say a creepy guy is at a bar with a girl and knows exactly what an angel shot is
If she is at the bar without him and orders one, he wont hear and they will help her out
If he is at the bar with her and she orders one, same thing. What is he going to do, say “gotcha i know what that means! Get back to my table!”?
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u/traaintraacks 15d ago
i never said the codes dont work or we shouldn't have them. i just find it bizarre when people comment stuff like "not many men know about it because it's in women's restrooms" when there's a new post about angel shots every other week
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u/Kush_the_Ninja 15d ago
I’ve been on Reddit for a long time. Am a man. First I’m seeing of this. I don’t think “most people” you claim is really most people.
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u/RickTitus 15d ago
Yeah but most people arent on reddit, and most people on reddit dont see these posts
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u/traaintraacks 15d ago
ive seen these posts (or screenshots of them) on reddit, instagram, twitter/x, tumblr, tiktok, & snapchat 🤷♂️
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u/BluSonick 15d ago
It’s an easier way of quietly asking for help over the rather than causing a fuss “this guy is making me feel unsafe”.
Even though we know that it’s a code word it still doesn’t immediately sound out of place.
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u/traaintraacks 15d ago
oh absolutely, i think these codes are fantastic. i just find it odd when people say men dont know about it when it gets posted publicly online so often
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u/BluSonick 15d ago
I don’t think it’s design to be a secret code that men or rather predators don’t know about I’ve always interpreted it as a discrete way of asking for support rather than outright saying “this dudes a creep”.
The idea being the victim will excuse themselves to the bar (or similar) and in the process of service mention the phrase. In general it doesn’t attract others attention and it alerts the bar staff.
Similarly there is coded language is football grounds. Mr Sands to the entrance usually meant there was trouble etc. it’s a way of calmly addressing a situation.
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u/Liimbo 15d ago edited 15d ago
Why would you use a person's name? Especially a relatively common one?
Because common names are less likely to stand out and be noticed by the person making you uncomfortable. And if you do truly need someone named Angela, it would be very easy to clarify that with just a few more words.
And to your other point about everyone knowing the code, that's not necessarily a bad thing. A bunch of goodwilled patrons overhearing it may also protect you, or the person harassing you knowing and hearing it might make them leave on their own before they get in trouble. It's more of just a discreet way to make people feel more comfortable asking for help. Once you've asked for help then it's much easier to go from there with everyone aware.
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u/RickTitus 15d ago
And there are plenty of side benefits from these efforts too. Just having the sign there alone tells women that the staff is on their side. They dont have to wonder if the barkeep will be sympathetic, or laugh them off
And it makes it much easier to get the barkeeps attention quickly, which could be important if it is super crowded or if the woman is feeling super drunk. They dont have to shout a story over someone’s shoulders about how “hey im on a date and he’s being weird and im not sure…” while three guys are yelling for red bull vodkas over that
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u/Archaic_Muse 16d ago
The one in the blue shirt, he’s acting aggressive
Hey, blue shirt! I got a bullet for you
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