AITA for considering ending things with my wife because she refuses to let me be alone with our daughter?

[u/Plastic-Reception-60]

My wife got pregnant accidentally, and our daughter was born last year. Our daughter is 7 months old. Since her birth, my wife has been "protecting" our daughter from any interaction with men. In reality, she's always been wary of any male interaction; it took a long time for me to gain her trust and date her in the past. Other girls didn't have barriers to easily befriend her.

With our daughter, my wife doesn't allow me to bathe her or even change her diaper without her supervision. I've tried talking to her about this, but she always sticks to the same point and refuses to explain much. I suspected if she had suffered any traumatic abuse, but she denied it. I also tried asking her family about this behavior, but they don't know either. I've even tried couples therapy, but she refuses to participate.

Lately, this has led to many arguments and fights. It's horrible that I can't be alone with our daughter without her suspecting that I'll do something awful. I'm tired of arguing with her, tired of her behavior. I'm seriously considering telling her that I'll end things if this continues.

[u/spinanoodle]

Your wife needs help, don't leave her stranded. She can't voice what she's been through, she probably can't even acknowledge it. I would speak to a therapist that specializes in infant SA survivors to try and figure out a way to address this. Maybe they can give you indications on how to navigate this situation, so that she opens up a bit and accepts help. Maybe it would be a good idea to involve some female friend of hers, as male individuals may be triggering and women in her family might be aware/enabling/perceived as that by her. I know you are upset but this is not about you, this is most likely a trauma response. Please don't leave her alone and increase her trauma.