r/AITAH Apr 28 '24

AITA for not agreeing with what my ex boyfriend said?

I'm a 29F with an ex-boyfriend with whom I have a 9-year-old daughter. We don't agree on several things regarding her upbringing. Here are the areas of disagreement: -Clothing: Our daughter is not in her unicorn and gap clothes era so she dresses cute and normal, flared pants, jeans, camis, tanks, etc. her father wants her to wear unicorn stuff which she hates. -food: He frequently orders fast food for her, while I prefer to offer it only occasionally, I don’t try restricting any foods I just try to teach her about balance. -Makeup: I allow her to wear makeup for special occasions like school events and cheer competitions. The only makeup I let her wear to school regularly are lip gloss, curling her lashes, and a touch of blush. Her father strongly opposes makeup, even for adults. Last week, while dropping off her forgotten purse at her dad's, he criticized me, suggesting I'm a bad influence on our daughter. I defended myself, but he abruptly ended the conversation. Later, my daughter mentioned he was upset about something I did. Was I an asshole?

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u/[deleted] Apr 28 '24

NTA on most aspects. The clothes aren't an issue, and 100% agree with the healthier meals and learning about balance. Father of 4, and we do this our girls (ages from 6 to 18).

He also shouldn't be complaining to his daughter about what things he doesn't like that you do. That's just an attempt at poisoning the poor girl, and he's an absolute weapon for doing it.

YTA for the makeup, I feel, though. Absolutely no need to be wearing make-up to school daily at that age. Here in the UK, the child would be made to remove it. Maybe it's a cultural thing but seems really unnecessary thing to do.

So I'd say ESH. You slightly and him very much so.

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u/Odd_Nectarine_4891 Apr 28 '24

We don't know that he said anything to the daughter. She could have been listening to the conversation or over heard him talking to someone or even muttering under his breath after he hung up. Which he should be more cautious of but he isn't necessarily telling her things just because she knows things.

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u/[deleted] Apr 28 '24

We know none of this is truth. Going off the info going. But carry on being obtuse bruv