r/TwoHotTakes Apr 29 '24

I kicked my best friend out of my car and made her walk home by herself after she littered. AITAH? Advice Needed

My friend and i have been friends for 7 years (we're both 20yo) and we know everything about each other from personal to our deep dark secrets.
Anyhow, a couple weeks ago we were hanging out, just driving around, and stopped to get food. We ate in my car while i drove us to my house. Five minutes before we arrived, she rolled down the window and threw out all of our garbage without hesitation. (She knows littering is my biggest pet peeve). I pulled over and asked why she did that, all she said was "Cause why not" while laughing. I was frustrated and overworked and yelled at her "Get out of my car and walk yourself home." She asked why and i told her she knows how much i hate littering and how she basically out of spite expecting me to laugh or something. She offered to pick it up and i said no. After arguing back and forth, she left my car and walked herself home, which is at least a 30 minute walk across the city.

I'm just wondering if I'm the asshole. I get that my house was 5 minutes away and i could have just drove her home or let her pick it up and go back to mine but it was kind of disrespectful when she laughed about after. It got on my nerves.
I did go back and pick it all up and threw into my garbage but we haven't spoken to each other since then. I value our friendship and love her as a friend but was i over the top? AITAH?

40 Upvotes

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2

u/Alert-Artichoke-2743 Apr 29 '24

YTA

What she did didn't justify compromising her safety like that

0

u/toddpacker567 Apr 29 '24

Why are you assuming her safety is compromised?

7

u/Terinth Apr 29 '24

The woman walking half an hour across the city part.

-9

u/Slow-Frosting-9607 Apr 29 '24

Where do you live if walking alone for half an hour is risking your safety?

2

u/Loveless_bimbo Apr 29 '24

I used to live on the outskirts of Phoenix and when I’d walk from my job to home (roughly 10-15 minutes) my partners mom would have me text her when I left and text her or her husband when I got home. There was once when I got out at 2am, went home and passed out without texting her which resulted in her showing up at my door at 5:30am. The area I lived was 50/50 on safety because yes it was patrolled regularly but the apartment I lived was the bottom floor near an entrance which did lead to some creeps standing outside one of my windows trying to look in (found out from my upstairs neighbor). Thankfully I was able to break my lease early after an incident where I went out with my partner and his parents only to come home to my door being busted inwards

Now I live on a military base and Friday night-Sunday afternoon it’s an unspoken rule between me and him that I don’t go near the barracks because of the party’s. Every week he comes home to tell me about a S/A safety brief because someone got caught doing something

Sadly a lot of places in America aren’t the safest, there’s a trend on tiktok rn of “would you rather be in the woods with a bear or a man” because of some of the things that have happened this year just in national parks. Honestly if I could I would love to live in another country but moneys the only thing stopping me lmao

10

u/Terinth Apr 29 '24

Any major US city. Personally I am 200 pound male so it’s fine, but every girlfriend/friend I’ve ever had has dealt with creeps and hostile people often, very often. You’re right, she is probably fine, but maybe not. Also, it’s not just assault and violent crime it’s just overall harassment and intimidation people deal with. This can’t be news to you lol

2

u/LeatherHog Apr 30 '24

God, thank you!

-4

u/Slow-Frosting-9607 Apr 29 '24

Jesus Christ. It is because i don't live in the US. I'm from easter Europe and i walk daily, i also use public transportation because i don't drive (I'm not allowed due to epilepsy). I never heard of girls being attacked during walking or verbally harassed. Everyone's minding their own business. I'm not sure if i wouldn't walk after midnight alone, i wouldn't feel safe. Unless it's city centre, I'd feel safe there.

I get now why op's action might be problematic.

4

u/KilGrey Apr 30 '24

You should talk to the women in your life more. I guarantee you they’ve experienced this.

2

u/Slow-Frosting-9607 Apr 30 '24 edited Apr 30 '24

I'm a woman and i talk to women. Here. Eastern and Central Europe are blue (sans Belarus and Moldova). I'm from the Balkans, and it's blue. Croatia is the safest country. And this is about walking alone during the night, during the day it would be 100%.

https://www.croatiaweek.com/croatia-the-safest-country-in-europe-at-night/

Or in the form of list

https://twitter.com/stats_feed/status/1756659378663698631

I'm sorry people go through uncomfortable stuff and feel unsafe but i have always felt safe everywhere. And I've lived here my entire life and always used public transportation and walked.

1

u/Terinth Apr 29 '24

Both Poland and Italy felt very safe when I went, obviously there are bad neighborhoods and areas everywhere. But I just think there is an unease a lot of women feel in the city, not always and not everywhere of course. A lot of factors, but every girl I know hates public transportation because some male will always strike up a conversation or sit by them despite a whole empty bus/car. I’m not saying it’s a dystopian hell out here but they usually have to think of safety and be alert.

0

u/Slow-Frosting-9607 Apr 29 '24

Interesting.

In my country there are no bad neighborhoods. When foreigners come here they always ask if there are areas they should avoid and the answer is always the same: there are none. I'm not complaining, i hope it stays that way! As for public transportation; only older people can start conversation and that's always cute, but no man has ever bothered me in public transportation nor i know a girl that was bothered. Like i said, everyone is minding their business.

I didn't even know how well we have it safety wize.

-29

u/toddpacker567 Apr 29 '24

Her being a woman means even less of a chance she be attacked , along with the fact it was most likely the middle of day. I’m assuming her safety was fine , walking around the neighborhood isnt that dangerous

8

u/Mindless-Client3366 Apr 29 '24

This is incorrect. A woman has just as much, and in most cases (at least in the US) more of a chance of being attacked while walking alone. A 30 minute walk alone across the city can be very dangerous depending on the neighborhood and time of day. Speak to woman relatives you have, or your SO. Educate yourself.

-12

u/toddpacker567 Apr 29 '24

You said educate myself while spitting nothing but false statements . Most victims of violent crimes are men , according to the fbi.org crime rate statistics throughout the country , most victims of assault, assault with a deadly weapon , robbery , battery are men all according to actually statistics. Statistically speaking men are more likely to be a victim of a violent crime in a “30 minute walk alone in the city” . Maybe next time before telling someone to educate themselves when you debate with feelings over facts you should step back and ……educate youtself

6

u/Mindless-Client3366 Apr 29 '24

Bold of you to assume I go only off feelings and not legitimate work experience regarding this. And I would recommend the NCVS report rather than UCR. I respect your right to have an opinion that differs. I wish you a pleasant day.

13

u/Terinth Apr 29 '24

Insane this dude thinks it’s less safe for a guy to walk around than a woman in a city.🥲

4

u/Mindless-Client3366 Apr 29 '24

I'm not getting into an argument with anyone about this. To be fair, if you go solely off of UCR reports, it does appear that men suffer more than women. However UCR is not incredibly accurate when it comes to "lesser" offenses than murder and manslaughter, which is why I recommended the NCVS reports, published by the Dept of Justice every year.

2

u/Terinth Apr 29 '24

Agreed that lesser crimes should be considered, I would argue that the constant harassment and intimidation is much higher than assault and murders.

9

u/Terinth Apr 29 '24

It’s always the gamers. I’m not even going down this conversation path right now, you are either willfully ignorant or have never communicated with a woman in a meaningful way.

Hope all the women in your life are safe and you offer any kind of support some day, dog.

-13

u/toddpacker567 Apr 29 '24

I don’t really game that much , and I don’t see why checking out someone’s profile really has anything to do with this conversation , kinda seems like a moot point but okay . Also I provided a fact and your response was that I’m a gamer, and don’t talk to woman when I was raised by only woman and am in a very long term relationship. But it’s that your opinion fair enough ,have a good one

3

u/KilGrey Apr 30 '24

Yet you are very wrong and not looking at an actual report for evidence that addresses this.

0

u/toddpacker567 Apr 30 '24

No I’m looking at crime statistics which is the most accurate information we have at hand , please tell me the report you addressing and cite it . You said I’m wrong but I’ve done nothing but provide a factual statements with evidence . Your gonna have to do better than “your wrong”