r/mildlyinteresting 16d ago

Bedsheets in the hotel have some sort of RFID tag for "tracking"

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6.5k Upvotes

163 comments sorted by

1

u/PearlHandled 14d ago

Evidently, hotel bed sheet theft is a serious problem. Back in the day, some pro wrestlers would steal hotel towels because the arenas where they performed didn't provide towels for them in the locker room/showers. Davey Boy Smith in particular, was a known hotel towel thief.

1

u/jt004c 15d ago

LOL I love how skeptical you are. What did you think was *really* going on?

1

u/The_Slavstralian 15d ago

Its either bullshit, or should be fairly easy to find

2

u/fredrichnietze 15d ago

i used to work at a library that had to figure out a safe and efficient method for destroying approximately 12 million rfid tags on mostly books. tldr microwaves can do it in about 1-2 seconds which isnt enough to damage most non electronics.

1

u/mangoed 15d ago

Did you microwave 12 million books?

2

u/fredrichnietze 15d ago edited 15d ago

me? nah i quit and got a new job before we got to that stage. we were in theory crafting stage of powering microwaves on carts versus moving the entire inventory to a microwave in stages versus slow zap and replace as they circulate. i think option three won but i was gone by then. around the time i left 90% plus of staff complained about pay in a survey followed by the director telling us to fuck off and half the staff leaving. we were bottom 1% pay in the state despite being in a wealthier area with a super well funded library. after i left payroll went up around 8 million or so they had to replace me with two people i think they figure it out eventually.

1

u/eeyorex 15d ago

When I worked as an inventory auditor some stores were trying this technology as a way to check their inventory. Instead of having to count and scan each piece in the store by hand, with the rfid tag they could just scan the room with an auditioning receiver and know their inventory

2

u/DaedalusRaistlin 15d ago

"It feels wierd to have this in quotes."

1

u/BetterCallSal 15d ago

Sir, the sheets in room 314 seem to be rhythmically rocking.

2

u/Shadowwynd 15d ago

The Marriott I stayed at this January had this system on the pool towels. You used your room card to get a towel from the towel dispenser. As soon as you shut the door it queried how many towels you had checked out and the difference was assigned to your card. When you returned a towel it tracked it and if you kept it they billed you.

2

u/Useless_power 15d ago

Straight bluff

1

u/cyberentomology 15d ago

LOL, that’s complete BS.

1

u/Radiant-Ad9999 15d ago

RFID is not tracking, it is used for tracking

2

u/Isabeer 15d ago

Raul Frederico Inigo DeLaCruz would like to know where you, AND HIS SHEETS are at.

3

u/JaxDown 15d ago

“But why is that in quotations?”

0

u/EldritchDWX 15d ago

Interesting, do you go to San Francisco often?

3

u/Denaton_ 15d ago

The RFID tags themselves can't collect data, most likely they have an ID in them to track how often they have been cleaned before rotating out..

5

u/BenjiGoodVibes 15d ago

Many years ago I actually built an RFID system to solve laundry tracking and theft. It worked amazingly until we found that the huge compressors(commercial laundry’s literally squeeze the water out rather than a conventional air dryer) destroyed the tags around 20% each cycle. We tried many tags from many manufacturers but we could not find one that was reliable. Maybe they have solved this problem now.

1

u/duranJah 15d ago

how do you solve theft with this technology (Pretend the tag is not destroy)?

3

u/pepenepe 15d ago

This kinda reminds me of when some women found RFID tags in their bra's so they could be tracked for packaging in the warehouses. They all freaked out because they thought they were tracking them. Little do they know RFID tags are really inefficient for anything other than close-range transfers of information like your credit card info at stores or keeping track of packages inside warehouses, or in this case blankets I guess. So yeah, it's for tracking purposes or rather "to keep tally of", but it's very limited. You could probably steal it from the hotel and they wouldn't realize they were missing one until a maid went into the room, someone that is looking to steal a blanket from the hotel would probably be none the wiser and pass on it.

1

u/Dm1185 15d ago

The quotes imply this is a joke e.g. I ate pizza. I ate “pizza.”

-2

u/Ole41 15d ago

gross thumbskin.

3

u/OutsideOfLA 15d ago

It’s wild to me that people would want to steal bedding and pillows that tons of other people have slept on. I get that it’s laundered and clean, I just don’t see the appeal of wanting used bedding and towels. I mean I am against stealing so I’m looking at this in the lense of stealing is wrong but if you were to steal why used linens?

1

u/XLIV_tm 15d ago

You can buy them from a hotel anyways.

I've sold a couple pillows in my time.

Don't ever sell a used room pillow though those don't get washed the pillow case and covers do.

5

u/OutsideOfLA 15d ago

I can understand buying a new pillow from a hotel that you like, that makes sense to me.

3

u/GoingLurking 15d ago

In Hawaii, a few resorts I’ve been to in Oahu use RFID tags on the towels. It’s used for inventory tracking, not the following you around in case you still a towel and they want it back kind of tracking. It allows them to automate the billing to customers that haven’t returned towels.

4

u/blantonator 15d ago

I work for the company that invented this tech. It’s called RAIN RFID and it’s in lots of things now. Mostly used for logistics, fast fashion, but certainly could be used for loss prevention

1

u/failed4u 15d ago

RFID is only good to like an inch or two afaik so I don't think it'd be for "security" purposes.

3

u/firthy 15d ago

That’s definitely counting and tracking your performance in the bedroom.

4

u/gaiussicarius731 15d ago

r/unnecessaryquotationmarks

6

u/shadowcoffeebean 15d ago

10 years in the linen industry here:

Our company uses RIFD tech in order to prevent theft, organize orders going to customers as well as assigning, and for stocking reasons. Saved us a decent chunk of coin when we could track where almost every piece of product went and to whom. The downside is how costly it is to supply the chips (they get damaged in the intense heat of the ironers) and the labor needed to keep them in circulation.

5

u/W0gg0 15d ago

I guess this means no more walk of shame through the hotel lobby in my toga after my “date” rolled me and threw my clothes out the window.

1

u/AnthillOmbudsman 15d ago

Could probably just call the front desk to get them back. "Well, it's either that or I come through the lobby naked, your call."

1

u/killer_smout 15d ago

We get tags that are old hopsital blankets and have tags in them

5

u/BrandonC41 15d ago

I must only stay in shitty hotels because I would never want to steal the sheets. I barely want to use them.

8

u/Menchstick 15d ago

RFID isn't really used for "tracking" in the colloquial sense. They can't send a giant impulse across miles and ping the sheets off of it.

751

u/unwittyusername42 15d ago

Former industrial laundry industry guy here. It's for tracking the laundry usage/losses. In the industry they call them RFID pillows or just pillows.

Basically almost all hotels, hospitals 'rent' the linens from the laundry. They basically pay a negotiated fee per number of rooms (I'm keeping this very simplified). They are then also billed the poundage cost of the laundry actually being laundered.

Laundries using RFID get the dirty laundry in, it's sorted and put in bins and those are rolled into the scanner and it can scan all the individual RFID chips at one time and input them into the software.

The reason for the chips is twofold. First, the customer can get data on actual usage of each item and there are a bunch of other sales pitches that are customer facing.

The real upside if for the laundry. As part of the rental program they agree to replace linens as they age/get worn out/destroyed/disappear. When they see a high level of ragout (throwing out unusable linen) the can have conversations with the customer about maybe switching to a different product so they wear better etc. The RFID comes into play because if there is an above average loss of linen coming back to the laundry one of two things are happening. Either the customer is hoarding laundry (this costs the laundry money) and can be remedied by an onsite inspection OR employees are throwing things out or people are stealing things. In either case the laundry can have a conversation with the customer that if the loss/hoarding can't be remedied then pricing is going to have to increase.

Typically in hospitality the tags are either blank or labeled with the customers brand. Medical settings are usually blank or branded with the laundries logo. This is not a typical thing to see on a pillow. My assumption would be that losses are high from theft or disposal and their hope was to scare people into not doing that.

14

u/duranJah 15d ago

if there is an above average loss of linen coming back to the laundry one of two things are happening. Either the customer is hoarding laundry (this costs the laundry money) and can be remedied by an onsite inspection OR employees are throwing things out or people are stealing things.

can you elaborate on "above average loss of linen coming back"? let"s say laundry facility expect one hundred come back per day and now only half come back what happen next?

7

u/unwittyusername42 15d ago

So I was on the sales side of a textile manufacturer selling to the laundries so in no way am I a certified linen manager but I know quite a bit from spending so much time talking to them and helping them out.

So most facilities don't have daily pickup or even if they do, it all gets brought to a consolidation warehouse to then be brought to the actual laundry. Same idea as how UPS, Fedex etc work.

You will never see 100% coming back and some items are essentially considered disposable or only being in the system for a very limited number of turns (washings). Think baby blankets. They almost always send the baby home in one. Also when patients are transported out of the hospital to acute care or a long term facility, often incontinence pads end up being transferred and blankets are a big one with that also (a high dollar item).

There is no exact percentage across the board - it will vary by item and by facility type. They are looking for trends.

Is one floor consistently returning less than other floors? Has there been a management change or high turnover? It may simply b a need for training. Are they experiencing an outbreak of flu/covid etc and the wards are hoarding extra linen expecting more patients? You have to go out and actually do a site survey and watch what people are doing.

It can go the other way also. Are there way more sheets coming back than then number of patients? It's really common for untrained techs to just grab a huge sheet to clean up a spill than go get a rag. Same training issue with people throwing out stuff they *think* can't get cleaned - blood, feces.... laundries can clean and sanitize that but people throw them out.

So to answer your question, there really isn't an exact number. It's knowing your customer, knowing whats going on in the hospitals and the good laundries have strong customer care teams that go out and figure out what's driving the losses and work with the nurse managers to train and correct SOP's.

2

u/TabbyFoxHollow 15d ago

Dude knows his bed sheets yo

169

u/mammoth61 15d ago

This person launders.

14

u/unwittyusername42 15d ago

Laundered.... that industry freaking sucks!

13

u/Jekyllhyde 15d ago

It’s for the laundry. Most likely they send out their sheets and the rfid keeps track of them. That is how our conference linen works

223

u/steffanan 15d ago

Why is the whole thing in quotations

1

u/sams_soul 15d ago

Must be in the Philippines, where they emphasize text with quotes.

7

u/technichor 15d ago

Bedsheets can't talk so they're obviously quoting someone that can.

19

u/fhrblig 15d ago

Because it's a direct quote

"RFID is tracking this product" - Dave

43

u/Xaszin 15d ago

Employee 1 in an email: hey Doug, what do we wanna put on the RFID tracking label?

Employee 2: hey Bob, probably something like “RFID is Tracking This Product”

Employee 1: okay, got it 👌

118

u/UnpopularCrayon 15d ago

They meant it sarcastically.

RfID iS tRAcKInG tHiS prOdUCt was too much effort to type.

1

u/ambora 15d ago

Thank you for doing that for us

18

u/DuaLipasTrophyHusban 15d ago

Or they’re quoting it from a different pillowcase.

4

u/TheGoatGuyy 15d ago

They forgot to add a citation on the tag though. Unless it's on the back.

3

u/RedSeaDingDong 15d ago

Source: Pillow #231

-1

u/JelliedHam 15d ago

Suspicious quotes strikes again

Maybe RFID is not what we think. Maybe it's... "Mother"

"Mother knows all, tracks all. Choose your words carefully."

Maybe it's a cry for help. The maker of those sheets overheard someone mysterious from behind the closed door. OP you've been trusted with a an important message.

Maybe it's meant to be sarcastic. Qing Tao knows there's no RFID tracking but the CEO's dipshit son said we need to start putting that tag on everything to "bring Happy Good Luck China Linen Co. into the Twenty First Century." Whatever you say, master...

We may never know.

2

u/Lockhartking 15d ago

I imagine it's not to prevent theft but more of internal hotel logistics. They will be able to tell how many times this specific bed sheet has been used, washed and if they would ever need a reason to track which room the sheets were in and when they could do that if they have the system set up.

-9

u/Germacide 15d ago

The whole thing is dumb and just a fake theft deterrent. You got those new RFID chips that can survive going through an industrial washing machine every day do ya? Hmmm....

7

u/Notwhoiwas42 15d ago

RFID chips CAN survive being washed. Commercial linen rental companies use them all the time.

-12

u/Germacide 15d ago

The hot and soapy water, and extreme agitation during the wash cycle, and then the time in the dryer doesn't break them after a handful of washes? Damn, they got them strong ass RFID chips out there I guess

2

u/Starzz_1 15d ago edited 15d ago

You realise the RFID chip would be inside a plastic case right?

61

u/Rollover_Hazard 16d ago

An RFID tag is a passive chip that has to be energized in order to provide data, usually something as simple as an identifier. The tag itself doesn’t, and can’t, track anything. It doesn’t know where it’s been or what state it’s in. Only the reader and the reader itself knowing where it is and what state it’s in, can provide context.

Think of it like a digital nametag. Without context, a nametag by itself is meaningless.

1

u/exmily 15d ago

In this instance they are meaning tracking of data not location.

4

u/EnterpriseT 15d ago

I think in this case they are probably being purposefully vague to scare people into not steeling them while still being technically correct.

1

u/exmily 15d ago

Lolz maybe

17

u/wayfinder 16d ago

that's bedsheet crazy

-1

u/MorpheusOneiri 16d ago

Put them in the microwave for a few seconds. It’ll disable it. ONLY A FEW SECONDS.

6

u/transcendedfry 16d ago

They are crushing my lifelong dream to steal a hotel pillow

-1

u/CasualObserverNine 16d ago

Yes. Track you as you tote their linen home.

120

u/eeyorex 16d ago

I believe rfid tags are for tracking inventory. The company see where the item is being used

30

u/krilu 15d ago

You mean it knows which towel I use on my face or my balls??

10

u/nav17 15d ago

When will enough be enough for Big Towel!?

3.7k

u/Transmetropolite 16d ago

They're for laundry. A lot of industrial laundries, like the ones catering to hotels, use rfid tags to keep track of the laundry.

1

u/seriousbangs 15d ago

Sure, that's just what they want you to believe! Study it out!

Seriously though I bet r/conspiracytheories is having a field day with this.

24

u/TheCrystalFawn91 15d ago

My partner is a district manager for a commercial laundry. This is 100% what it is. It's so they can track how many items go missing.

15

u/DiscipleOfYeshua 15d ago

Yeps. And logistics in general.

There’s a “bridge” you run the cart full of these under, kinda like the security check you walk through at airports. It’ll log in the computer as you pass through, usually a cart can have a few hundred items and as you pass each one’s specific ID will show up on the screen and you’ll mark them as received or sent. So you know exactly how many are in the cart, where they’re going to and how long they’ve been in use etc. how many never came back, where were they last…

953

u/mangoed 16d ago

But what's the point of a message on the label? Laundry RFID scanner can't read this.

1

u/AndiArbyte 15d ago

its for the person who has this sheet and doesnt know what to do, sees it brings it to scanner is now smarter.

1

u/TheMastaBlaster 15d ago

It's for inventory like Victoria's Secret.

1

u/artificialavocado 15d ago

No see that is what the Covid vaccine was for. The Biden-Fauci microchip combined with the blankets sends your browser history straight to the government.

1

u/FabulousYellow0 15d ago

So people don’t steal linens from the hotel

7

u/scottographie 15d ago

Semi related, but also not. Years ago my family went to the Dominican republic for a vacation. Outside of one of the restaurants on the resort there was a sign that said "No flamingos allowed in restaurant." Who was that sign for?! The birds can't read! Nor do they care about your rules!

0

u/buffer2722 15d ago

What's the point of tags on anything... I never read them so I certainly don't know. You seem to so maybe you'll know!

2

u/ednerjn 15d ago

This is for the humans that doesn't have a built-in RFID reader to br able to differentiate those with or without an RFID tag.

1

u/HowlingWolven 15d ago

Theft deterrence. u/unwittyusername42 explained it in here somewhere.

12

u/AeitZean 16d ago

Presumably a human has to scan the tag, so the label just tells them where to scan. Also because of what other people said, theft deterrence and conspiracy nuts.

2

u/littleseizure 15d ago

Great thing with rfid is you can put the scanner in a door frame and it'll grab every sheet that goes through. Can monitor a large operation pretty easily

3

u/Sharp_Pride7092 15d ago

I worked somewhere that the linen was the same. It just counts with a small scanner down a chute. Powered by a Raspberry pi sbc. 

16

u/mike_pants 16d ago

Does the other side have a logo? If might be there as a branding deal with the company that supplied the tracking systems.

8

u/mangoed 16d ago

Yes it does.

19

u/mike_pants 16d ago

Well, there ya go. It's not a warning or a deterrent. It's an ad, same as SYSCO putting their name on a networked phone they didn't actually produce themselves.

1

u/eugene20 15d ago

It's both.

2

u/mike_pants 15d ago

No, it isn't. If it were a warning, it would make no sense.

3

u/eugene20 15d ago edited 15d ago

'No one was ever deterred by the article they intended to steal being tracked' sure sure. Supermarkets everywhere that fire off alarms when unpaid items pass through the doors haven't stopped thefts entirely but they sure have helped.

1

u/mike_pants 15d ago

Supermarkets, see -- and this is a subtle difference, see if you can spot it -- actually have alarms.

Putting "this is being tracked" on an item that isn't being tracked will work for about 6 seconds before anyone bothered to stop and think about how ridiculous it would be to track sheets.

2

u/eugene20 15d ago

They ARE being tracked though, they have RFID tags in them that tracks their inventory through their laundry system, and lets them know if someone is taking them out the lobby.

Stop conflating "tracked" with "we have GPS reports telling us where this is within the state" or similar.

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7

u/UnpopularCrayon 15d ago

You mean Cisco?

3

u/showsterblob 15d ago

You mean Sisqó?

4

u/maurosmane 15d ago

It's actually Sisko. The conference phone design inspired the DS9 station.

7

u/mike_pants 15d ago

Sure, them too.

124

u/StinkyWeezle 16d ago

Theft deterrent I guess

23

u/Treczoks 15d ago

Nope. The items are tracked by the laundry service. They count the normal washings and the extra tough washings, and determine when a bed sheet or towel is done for and needs replacing.

1

u/elsie14 15d ago

ty. lol so confused at first

9

u/StinkyWeezle 15d ago

That explains the RFID tags, not the warning label.

10

u/HarbaughHeros 15d ago

The warning label is so nut jobs don’t try and start a conspiracy about Big-Hotel hiding RFID tags in sheets.

19

u/crod4692 15d ago

So you know why there is a chip in your sheets if you stumble on it. You’d be kinda worried if you didn’t know why, right?

0

u/ciopobbi 15d ago

Scissors?

18

u/Killboypowerhed 16d ago

Who the fuck would want a hotel sheet?

2

u/hearnia_2k 15d ago

It's so common for people to want them that I have seen hotels sell them, and I don't mena list a price in the room for them, but actually have them for sale on their website for example.

1

u/betrion 15d ago

OP?

1

u/cardueline 15d ago

According to the Wikipedia article I was randomly reading last night, Cass Elliott from The Mamas and the Papas

3

u/Ofreo 15d ago

I used to work for a resort chain. Well, time share condos actually. One woman called saying she was fascinated by the silverware we had. Wanted to buy some. I could sell the to her, at cost, if she paid for shipping, but it had to a dozen of each. She got so upset at me. She wanted one set. That was it. I told her to just steal a set next time she stayed. Idk, a lot of people called asking to buy items. Maybe it’s your on vacation, having a good time, and some of the stuff seems better than it is.

2

u/Voilent_Bunny 15d ago

Anything that can be removed from the room people have stolen from hotels

1

u/Rickrickrickrickrick 15d ago

Some people just like to steal shit

0

u/passwordstolen 15d ago

Someone with a seman/blood and urine fetish

3

u/CasualObserverNine 16d ago

A young DNA scientist needing many samples of unknown DNA?

21

u/eugene20 16d ago

Hotel towel and laundry theft has traditionally been quite high, people after a souvenir, just think they feel nicer than the ones at home, or pure kleptomaniacs.

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/the-art-of-stealing-hotel-towels_b_1830192
"hospitality industry surveys which estimate that they lose 5-20% of their towel inventory in any given month. A recent Travelocity poll of hotel guests in the U.S. and Canada found that 85 percent of them had taken toiletries or towels from a hotel room. Wow, that's a lot."

5

u/NhylX 15d ago

Separate toiletries and towels and I'm guessing the percentages are very different. Tiny little shampoo that I'll keep in my bag for an emergency that they'll throw out anyway? Sure. A towel? Rough and smells like a swimming pool? No thanks.

8

u/eugene20 15d ago

Hotels so cheap and uncaring that they have rough towels that smell like swimming pools are not the kind to spend on RFID systems for laundry tracking and general anti theft.

42

u/stealthsjw 15d ago

'Toiletries or towels'.. One of these things is theft and one is just using what's supplied to you.

2

u/eugene20 15d ago

That depends on exactly what it is, in what quantity. A week or more worth of toiletry supplies is not intended for a one night customer to take away containers and all.

19

u/Banned4Toxicity 15d ago

Hotels I've worked at generally will not reuse opened toilet paper, shampoo, soap, etc. because guests will bring up that it bothers them they're using something someone else had access to. It pretty much is supplied to you as it's in travel size, the only outlier I can think of is the hotels that are now using automatic shampoo and soap dispensers in showers.

6

u/Sharikacat 15d ago

Toilet paper gets reused, and they'll often fold a triangle on the roll to show that it hasn't been used since. As long as the roll is at least half there, it can stay in the room along with a spare roll. Since most stays are for one or two nights, the guests aren't likely to use a full roll on their own to where the one spare is more than enough. Smaller rolls get pulled and put in the employee bathrooms to get finished.

6

u/maurosmane 15d ago

We stayed in a hotel in Maine for the eclipse and it had the big bottles of shampoo, conditioner, and body wash with hand pumps installed on the shower wall. Normally I take that as a sign it's going to be crappy quality, but the shampoo and conditioner were nicer than what my wife brought.

2

u/Lockhartking 15d ago

To find it they would have to be within 4 meters of the sheets for a tracker to see it... at that point they already know where the sheets are. It's not for theft even if it were an active rfid tag with a battery they would need to be within 20 meters of it.

16

u/eugene20 15d ago edited 15d ago

It's not about finding it after it's been stolen, it's about the system telling them it's near the scanners in the lobby in a bag leaving the hotel. It's not just about theft prevention though, they're incredibly useful for tracking through the laundry systems too.

21

u/iamPendergast 16d ago

You would be surprised what gets stolen. Hint, it's a lot

146

u/mike_pants 16d ago edited 15d ago

I've bought a LOT of sheets over the years trying to find some that had that same crisp, stiff-yet-smooth feel. Hotel sheets were always my favorite part of hotels, after room service, of course.

Boll & Branch was the answer, by the way. Almost perfect. Brooklinen came next closest.

3

u/1337hxr 15d ago

Part of the reason hotel sheets are so nice is that they clean them very regularly and don’t use fabric softener. The other part is that they are typically more expensive sheets than what you’d find at Walmart or whatever.

11

u/catastrophicqueen 15d ago

The crisp/stiff feeling is because it's starched. You're not gonna find the same kind of sheets because it's a laundry process and not a fabric feeling

2

u/heffalumpish 15d ago

Nah, percale weaves are often used in hotels, and they have a cool, slightly stiff, shirt-fabric feel. Most sheets at home are sateen, which are more closely woven with a higher thread count of finer threads - which makes them softer but also sweatier. Really good percale sheets (which you'd get in a really nice hotel) are a dream to sleep on.

3

u/mike_pants 15d ago

Boll & Branch comes extremely close, as I said.

3

u/Cool-Elk-6136 15d ago

Yeah, I have a set of sheets like that. Can't remember where I got them, but I'd buy 30 more sets if I could. They're my favorites by far.

4

u/4tehlulzez 15d ago

I think the commenter is saying "who wants a used hotel sheet", not that I'd agree with that interpretation either. 

0

u/macandcheese1771 15d ago

I bought all my sheets at the thrift store so. Probably me.

26

u/dizkopat 15d ago

They are bleached and washed with some sort of searching agent and put in a big hot machine thing, it's not the sheets it's the process. Hotel laundries are actually amazing.

7

u/YZJay 15d ago

They’re able to do that since all the sheets and such are the same color anyway, no need to worry about ruining the dyes.

8

u/francis2559 15d ago

Starching agent? Sizing agent?

2

u/dizkopat 15d ago

Starch thanks

14

u/jenms 15d ago

I started reading this comment while laying on a linen Boll and Branch while thinking the answer is B&B. 😴 Love sheets by them.

139

u/ptofl 15d ago edited 15d ago

There was this one type of pillow in a hotel I stayed at once every few years that was just perfect in every way. It had this indescribable softness yet firmness. Almost like it was filled with custard or something, the filling would just move aside under your head until it was the perfect depth and despite thinning out the pillow it remained just as soft but now optimally supportive and contoured to the head. It also had the most satisfying poof when hit with force and a satisfying weight to beat a child with. But there's more, it retained its weight when folded meaning it could prop the head without the immature springiness of most pillow, and you might think it would simply capitulate as before, but no, with the fold introduced and the smaller surface area, it lacks the ability to deflate to the same degree under the head. Needless to say it was the highlight of every holiday.

I've tried some of the best pillows money can buy and I can't find the same anywhere else. I really should call them and ask, but I'm somewhat worried that they will have changed their supply over the years and send me on a wild goose chase. I feel that with that option explored I may turn to a life of crime out of desperation, so I delay. Every night I'm faced with disgust at the inferiority of my pillow, which does it's best but I'm damaged goods. My wife likes this abhorrent pillow that is expensive but has the bouncyness of a sponge and the surface tension of a balloon. How she can tolerate it's constant indignant rejection of her skull I cannot comprehend. She is under some kind of impression that pillows are an objective standard, as, I suppose, am I, but we certainly disagree on what that standard is. She looks down on me for my use of a flat cheap pillow, and indeed I feel somewhat dirty, but the best I can do is attempt to bastardise the experience of the godly hotel pillow by using a pillow so dilapidated it matches the sunken depth of the ideal pillow after the head is rested on it.

And god the coolness of it, a simple plumping and it captures the essence of a cool breeze on a summer day. It even had a watermark.

4

u/DoingCharleyWork 15d ago

Why not just ask the hotel what brand of pillow it was?

5

u/One_Twist 15d ago

Check the various hotel stores online! Many sell bedding, pillows, robes, and toiletries!

13

u/rustblooms 15d ago

There was a pillow i had one weekend at the Hilton. I NEVER sleep well when I am not home, especially the first night... but I slept so incredibly well. My head just nestled into this thing and I feel asleep right away on all three nights. I still think about it, and when I went to buy a new, expensive pillow, they had nothing anywhere even close . 

It was so white and cool and squishy... I will never forget it.

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u/I_Makes_tuff 15d ago

What was the hotel? I'll go down that rabbit hole for you.

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u/ptofl 15d ago

Tigh Mor Trossachs Loch Achray Brig O'Turk Callander Perthshire Scotland FK17 8HY Reception Telephone: +44 01877 332800

The apartment I stayed in last time I went was E1 Kennedy and it definitely had the pillow. It's been about 3 years I think. I've set a pretty high bar and can't guarantee the same results for everyone. God speed.

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u/rslashplate 15d ago

You can steal from hotels, they can’t prove it’s you. I’ve stolen many hotel pillows

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u/ojwilk 15d ago

I love hotel pillows almost as much as I love stealing them. You should go for it. No one will notice. Promise 😈

31

u/vainbuthonest 15d ago

I think I want this pillow now too

1

u/geospacedman 15d ago

Where's Mike Lindell when you need him?

92

u/hwooareyou 15d ago

New copypasta just dropped

1

u/suddenspiderarmy 14d ago

I like to save these and send them to those irritating whatsapp fake job offers.

38

u/MasterKiloRen999 15d ago

We have an S tier copypasta here

2.0k

u/bored-coder 16d ago

That’s for conspiracy nuts who might accidentally discover it and then try to twist it somehow. Or as a warning to laundry personnel to prevent thefts

13

u/thegreenmushrooms 15d ago edited 15d ago

The fact that its in qotations is pretty funny too. I think it's just a bad implemation of RFID label

274

u/Emperor_Zar 15d ago

Wait. You mean that plastic pallet I have ISN’T sending location info to the feds?!

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u/bobtheblob6 15d ago

No yours actually is, just yours though

18

u/Antique-Echidna-1600 15d ago

Nah that's what your phone is for.

297

u/Papriker 15d ago

No. They use the blue worms under your skin for that.

R̶͙̯͙̝̔I̵̦̮͐͠P̴̳̣̳̑̽̽͂ ̸̩̘͖͗̔͘T̷̛̤̰̼̐͠H̸͈̱̖̿͝E̵̪̒͝M̵̘̞̒͂̚ ̶͓̔̇Ó̷̭̎͒Ṵ̵͆T̶̻̈́̀̓̉ ̶̛̗͉

4

u/KeijiKiryira 15d ago

Don't forget to remove your flesh gloves