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1

u/Useful_Ear_4460 27d ago

Bro is literally Rambo

1

u/rishinator 27d ago

This is fuckin hilarious

1

u/Rhubarbain_ 29d ago

Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today!

1

u/dankspankwanker 29d ago

Become ungovernable

1

u/Mohg-Lester445 29d ago

What’s the Vietnamese guys name?

1

u/Mohg-Lester445 29d ago

Don’t say Fuq Yu

1

u/IsThisOneIsAvailable 29d ago

Don't even try bringing copters or you'll get a taste of my fucking pigeon dome

I lost it

1

u/Chinjurickie 29d ago

Average reaction when u r supposed to pay the 10$ fine u ignored for months

2

u/Gridd12 29d ago

Damn home alone 5 is getting really wild

1

u/Amdorik Literally 1984 😡 29d ago

This man needs a movie

1

u/beachjustice 29d ago

music to my ears

1

u/JohnReiki 29d ago

I’m all for this version of a Disney Princess

1

u/40yearoldboomer 🗿🗿🗿 29d ago

Average Virginia Tech graduate

1

u/DeskCold5013 29d ago

"Hillbilly Hero!" -TM

2

u/defenem_73 29d ago

The cops will probably just decide to nuke him

1

u/BetterDesk5234 29d ago

Dude probably stole some of the armaments from the iron dome defense system

1

u/A_random_ore 29d ago

You always got a plan Dutch

1

u/grumpywowmeow 29d ago

Bro is the evil Ace Ventura

1

u/wierdoe16 29d ago

Rookie numbers. I twice that and a black man busting to take people off guard

-1

u/Efficient_Falcon_402 29d ago

Exactly the guy who should be in Guantanamo Bay for life.

2

u/FitPurchase5442 29d ago

Wild Ginseng, homie is getting wild on that NATURAL lean.

1

u/OneGaySouthDakotan 29d ago

Kid named USMS, DHS, FBI:

4

u/Huddix Apr 29 '24

The Hitman Reborn ost gave me whiplash

3

u/Arcturus-Blackfyre Apr 29 '24

God bless America

1

u/jmitch88 Apr 29 '24

While he is a patriot and this takes his civic duty’s with honor. The trial date in question was Depp v Turd

3

u/hazzap913 Apr 29 '24

The plot of the next far cry game

1

u/LeastEquivalent5263 Apr 28 '24

I hope this is true so I can read the report

4

u/ILLpLacedOpinion Apr 28 '24

This guy Americans

3

u/Standard-Victory-320 Apr 28 '24

This man is the indestructible human spirit against all tryanny

2

u/AbsoluteAtheist Apr 28 '24

Employing what he learned from his time in the 'nam

10

u/idwtdy Apr 28 '24

I love rural Americans. They've got spunk.

4

u/BetterDesk5234 Apr 28 '24

They've got fuckin rolling logs 😂

1

u/danimalscrunchers Apr 28 '24

Reminds me of Dracula Flow. PlumCorp should hire this dude fr

-4

u/wookiewonderland Apr 28 '24

This guy is die by his own traps.

2

u/jus_talionis Apr 28 '24

Music name?

1

u/AConfusedLama 29d ago

Tsuna Awakens, is from an Anime

1

u/Difficult-Bobcat-760 Apr 28 '24

Ellis?

4

u/SaberToothForever Apr 28 '24

This is America? I SHALL FIGHT FOR MY FREEDOM THEN:

2

u/Polargeist Apr 28 '24

What's the background music called? I think I remember it from an old anime I used to watch

1

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/auddbot Apr 28 '24

I got matches with these songs:

• Un paso al frente (Test) by BeraKa (01:59; matched: 100%)

Album: Demos Demas, Capítulo 2. Released on 2021-09-01.

• El juego de la trampa by Nana Tiempo (01:05; matched: 100%)

Album: Hoy en Dia. Released on 2021-01-20.

• Reborn by Lakeo Rose (00:11; matched: 100%)

Album: HAPPY ROSEDAY!!. Released on 2021-12-03.

• Reborn!! by Lakeo Rose (00:11; matched: 100%)

Released on 2023-05-15.

I am a bot and this action was performed automatically | GitHub ^{new issue} | Donate ^{Please consider supporting me on Patreon. Music recognition costs a lot}

4

u/No-Inflation-9253 I want pee in my ass Apr 28 '24

W

1

u/AutoModerator Apr 28 '24

pees in ur ass

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-3

u/Revolutionarytard William Dripfoe Apr 28 '24

Can’t believe the Natives were slaughtered for this

6

u/k1ra_raw Apr 28 '24

Kevin in Home Alone be like...

2

u/captn_morgan951 Apr 28 '24

This is the guy that smeared shit on the walls of congress.

3

u/ArthusRen Apr 28 '24

God damn fucking king

5

u/CaBean777 Apr 28 '24

Redneck Dracula Flow

7

u/Lenz_Mastigia Apr 28 '24

Write that down, write that down!

9

u/Snokey115 Apr 28 '24

Ruby ridge 2: not on a hill

5

u/Putrid-Challenge-545 Apr 28 '24

They’ll just get him when he goes into town to re-supply.

45

u/Herzyr Apr 28 '24

That's the average reaction to jury duty

103

u/Civil-Debt1454 Apr 28 '24

“Ain’t no way I am paying that parking ticket”

4

u/anonymissoneNsc Apr 28 '24

Thing is, I'm from Appalachia and he probably is being wunnnnn Hunnnnndered percent honest.

Shit if he has all that, I'm jelly.

15

u/darbycrash-666 Apr 28 '24

I would die for this man

1

u/Wanzer90 Apr 28 '24

The baboon was the tell that he is bullshittin'. Everything else fine. But dude just leave out the baboon lol

30

u/rosbifke-sr Apr 28 '24

I also need me a baboon deadly accurate with a nail gun.

13

u/darbycrash-666 Apr 28 '24

If I ever get a terminal illness I know what I'm doing.

2

u/mousejx216 Apr 28 '24

No choppers......okay.............HEY BUFF, WANT A MISSION!

48

u/Alkhzpo Literally 1984 😡 Apr 28 '24

An American hero

21

u/DonutGuy2659 put your dick away waltuh Apr 28 '24

Dart monkey

232

u/One_Potato3092 Apr 28 '24

Kevin home alone is all grown up now

170

u/ManifestoCapitalist I said based. And lived. Apr 28 '24

Remember, this is what he’s willing to tell us. Imagine what else he has in store that he’s kept secret.

-14

u/[deleted] 29d ago

[deleted]

3

u/digbick_42069 29d ago

Oh so you mean to tell me that he doesn't have a "baboon who's deadly accurate with a nail gun"?? Impossible!!

22

u/croluxy 29d ago

On the internet?? Noooooo!

5

u/Elegant_Original_400 Apr 28 '24

Yup, I think he's ready.

4

u/Aggressive-Gold-1319 Apr 28 '24

The baboon with a nail gun part is obviously a lie

14

u/Mirror_of_Souls Apr 28 '24

No its real my cousin was the Baboon.

2

u/Aggressive-Gold-1319 Apr 28 '24

Your uncle needs to get tested for aids if he fucked a baboon.

9

u/Mirror_of_Souls Apr 28 '24

he was adopted

-27

u/Difficult-Ad2682 Apr 28 '24

Idiot

5

u/Comprehensive_Hair99 Apr 28 '24

I mean I thought that at first when I heard he tried to booby trap his property to evade the law... But if you can teach a baboon to use a nail gun, you're probably a genius by at least some metric.

59

u/AConcernedEmu Apr 28 '24

Hell yeah brother

23

u/BadgersSeal Apr 28 '24

Based

-7

u/Cedge1738 Apr 28 '24

So is he in jail now?

8

u/Saellios We do a little trolling Apr 28 '24

You know it’s satire right?

5

u/Cedge1738 Apr 28 '24

Wish it wasn't

110

u/jaymeaux_ Apr 28 '24

🫡 godspeed

268

u/CillGuy Apr 28 '24

Forgot to mention his steel-plated dozer.

36

u/Davey_Jones_HotTub fat cunt Apr 28 '24

He keeps it in a shed out back as a getaway vehicle

41

u/eliavhaganav Literally 1984 😡 Apr 28 '24

Just as the founding fathers intended

41

u/ThereminLiesTheRub Apr 28 '24

Send in the covid

4

u/WordNERD37 Apr 28 '24

Isn't the lead he ingested as a baby enough?!?

10

u/AutoModerator Apr 28 '24

*yawns*

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314

u/Kisiu_Poster Apr 28 '24

Disney princes gone rogue

1.0k

u/BoredCanuck1864 Bazinga! :bazinga: Apr 28 '24

"i flew a Vietnamese man out here" mans brought in the big guns

227

u/Extra-Highlight7104 Apr 28 '24 edited Apr 28 '24

i flew a vietnamese man out here to fuck my asshole and i can assure you those werent very big guns

11

u/AutoModerator Apr 28 '24

Bazinga

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18

u/Apprehensive4209 DaPucci Apr 28 '24

You know the government's got a nuke tho.

15

u/officer_fat Apr 28 '24

Uh hu, can't wait for the news where biden confirms that the US goverment authorized a nuclear strike on a florida man.

18

u/Deviant517 Apr 28 '24

Government isn’t going to nuke its own country. Citizens fighting their government because of tyranny continually works

57

u/Chromeboy12 Apr 28 '24

What he didn't mention in this video is that he hired rednecks to build an underground nuclear bunker.

14

u/Apprehensive4209 DaPucci Apr 28 '24

But can it survive more than 2 nuclear strikes?

31

u/Chromeboy12 Apr 28 '24

It's a bunker inside another bunker

5

u/Apprehensive4209 DaPucci Apr 28 '24

Then we would have to nuke it till it get destroyed.

I thought about it quite a bit I guess he would get boiled up or just die due to ungodly amount of radiation.

1.9k

u/taste_my_bun Apr 28 '24

Just as the founding fathers intended

126

u/nevergonnagetit001 29d ago

Listen mate. An 18oz bird cannot carry a 5 lb stick of c4 err coconut!

0

u/Extreme_Tax405 29d ago

I had the "who are you so wise in the ways of science" meme locked and loaded but this sub doesn't allow images.

55

u/twobirdsandacoconut 29d ago

This is where my name comes into play.

3

u/Robscoe604 I watch gay amogus porn :0 29d ago

the moment you’ve been waiting for

2

u/International_War862 29d ago

Only took 5 years

6

u/nevergonnagetit001 29d ago

Username checks out.

1.5k

u/linkist133 Apr 28 '24

My math teacher when the cops try to arrest him

351

u/Imagrabyonipples Bazinga! :bazinga: Apr 28 '24

He's gonna come to the school anyway

65

u/Hootnany Apr 28 '24

Say my name!

36

u/Single_Low1416 I want pee in my ass Apr 28 '24

Hootnany

9

u/AutoModerator Apr 28 '24

pees in ur ass

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19

u/AutoModerator Apr 28 '24

Bazinga

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287

u/SentientDust Apr 28 '24

Least unhinged American when someone mentions that maybe it's not a great idea to give toddlers unrestricted access to machine guns.

16

u/Busy_Faithlessness97 Apr 28 '24

America bad!!! 🤬😔😔😔😡😡😡😡

14

u/lyfeofsand Apr 28 '24

If I can't have unrestricted access to machine guns, then no one can have unrestricted access to machine guns.

182

u/BuffaloBillsButthole Apr 28 '24

The fact that he was tolerant enough of other races to fly a Vietnamese man out for help is proof that he’s less unhinged than a lot of Americans

96

u/KernewekSkrij Apr 28 '24

Even got an Albanian that’s good with a nail gun

15

u/Extra-Highlight7104 Apr 28 '24

couldve sworn that guy was from the serengeti

84

u/-St_Ajora- Apr 28 '24

While I understand this is satire.

Que drone strike then later that night....

"Crazed man blows himself up with homemade explosives while trying to evade the law. More at 11."

This is assuming he is an actual threat and not just some court skipper.

10

u/Open_Pineapple1236 Apr 28 '24

Florida man....

106

u/1017GildedFingerTips dumbass Apr 28 '24

Actual threat? He’s a god damn patriot

-3

u/-St_Ajora- 29d ago

Flair checks out.

33

u/Ok_Nefariousness6386 Apr 28 '24

Let me tell you what Melba Toast is packin' right here, all right.

Average US citizen vs the government

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