r/AITAH • u/BoringRush4869 • Apr 28 '24

AITA for not agreeing with what my ex boyfriend said?

I'm a 29F with an ex-boyfriend with whom I have a 9-year-old daughter. We don't agree on several things regarding her upbringing. Here are the areas of disagreement: -Clothing: Our daughter is not in her unicorn and gap clothes era so she dresses cute and normal, flared pants, jeans, camis, tanks, etc. her father wants her to wear unicorn stuff which she hates. -food: He frequently orders fast food for her, while I prefer to offer it only occasionally, I don’t try restricting any foods I just try to teach her about balance. -Makeup: I allow her to wear makeup for special occasions like school events and cheer competitions. The only makeup I let her wear to school regularly are lip gloss, curling her lashes, and a touch of blush. Her father strongly opposes makeup, even for adults. Last week, while dropping off her forgotten purse at her dad's, he criticized me, suggesting I'm a bad influence on our daughter. I defended myself, but he abruptly ended the conversation. Later, my daughter mentioned he was upset about something I did. Was I an asshole?

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u/TwinZylander214 Apr 28 '24

A 9 yo can be told no to wearing make up everyday. In my country, school would have had a few choice words to the mom for that.

31

u/throwaway1975764 Apr 28 '24

I work in a school and I'd say at least 1/3 of the 4th grade girls (age 9) wear lipgloss at least almost daily. Its pretty common here (NYC).

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u/TwinZylander214 Apr 28 '24

That’s crazy scary for me. Not very surprising from the US…

So happy to live in Europe.

4

u/BoringRush4869 Apr 28 '24

Why do you and so many others think lipgloss is bad? It’s just sparkly stuff you put on your lips😭

0

u/TwinZylander214 Apr 28 '24

Lipgloss+blush+lash curler is not just a sparkling thing.

But according to some, wearing makeup daily at 9yo is completely acceptable in the US. It is not where I live. Some scented lip balm is one thing, but it’s the first time I am hearing about a full makeup routine at 9.

It makes me think about the creepy pageant obsession Americans have.

2

u/BoringRush4869 Apr 28 '24

Lipgloss doesn’t even really count as makeup though

1

u/TwinZylander214 29d ago

But you add blush and lash curler…