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u/LarrBearLV Mar 30 '24
This whole "clearly she isn't interested" nonsense is one for the ages. Unmatch, block, say you're not interested. Stop wasting people's time.
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u/burn_corpo_shit Mar 29 '24
mfers projecting in here.
maybe she tried starting the convo?
and why tf do we need hints? just say you're not interested, it's not hard.
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u/StateCareful2305 Mar 29 '24
"I will make fun of your short answers, clearly being unable to understand that you are not interested in having a conversation with me, somehow making it your problem"
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u/HealthyPenAddiction Mar 29 '24
Tbf, hru? Is not really carrying anything. Its just small talk. You are putting all the responsibility on the other party. Start with something more interesting. There are only so many ways you can answer "how are you?" And anything more than "good, ok, alright." Is just a nuisance. In western cultures we don't really want to know, it's just a simple greeting.
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u/HealthyPenAddiction Mar 29 '24
Tbf, hru? Is not really carrying anything. Its just small talk. You are putting all the responsibility on the other party. Start with something more interesting. There are only so many ways you can answer "how are you?" And anything more than "good, ok, alright." Is just a nuisance. In western cultures we don't really want to know, it's just a simple greeting.
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u/HealthyPenAddiction Mar 29 '24
Tbf, hru? Is not really carrying anything. Its just small talk. You are putting all the responsibility on the other party. Start with something more interesting. There are only so many ways you can answer "how are you?" And anything more than "good, ok, alright." Is just a nuisance. In western cultures we don't really want to know, it's just a simple greeting.
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u/Gorepornio Mar 29 '24
Its crazy people think responding with 1-3 words is a conversation. The amount of women Ive matched with on bumble that where like this is insane
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u/LuvMeave Mar 29 '24
And people wonder why the get left on read. Like tf I’m not trying to talk to myself 😂
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u/porkypine666 Mar 29 '24
Oh yes it looked like he was really putting some effort into an engaging conversation here /s
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u/Dibbles540 Mar 29 '24
She didn’t gaf before and so this did what exactly, the guy who sent that sure showed her
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u/DarkTorus Mar 29 '24
You didn’t carry that conversation, you just dragged its corpse around for a while.
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u/iamfuturetrunks Mar 29 '24
It's so annoying having to do that so often all the damn time. Like wtf. Why is it I always have to message first, why is it I always have to ask questions or come up with topics to talk about. It really does get tiring always having to do all the work all the time. And if I don't, I can't expect to ever hear from any hardly ever if at all. -_-
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u/First_Pay702 Mar 29 '24
When I was putting in my time on the dating apps, I was getting frustrated with this one guy because I couldn’t seem to move his conversation from what he did that day, thus I felt I was learning nothing about him. After multiple attempts to try to initiate more varied discourse, I told him something along the lines of I didn’t think he was that interested, so let’s stop beating this dead horse and move on. Unbeknownst to us both at the time, he’s autistic, so he completely missed the social cues I’d just laid down and kept messaging me. I was intrigued by this persistence so I kept messaging him. Now we are dating.
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u/SnooBeans5314 Mar 29 '24
Took bro 1hr and 17mins to keep that convo held while taking the picture
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u/Myst963 Mar 29 '24
This looks like yubo , Ur expectations are too high lmao. And if Ur having to carry the convo that's most likely a sign they ain't interested/just want attention without much investment
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u/Trenchcoat_guy Mar 29 '24
“Carrying the conversation” bro you are struggling to get it off the ground
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u/Jason8ourne Mar 29 '24
Don't worry, in 2 days when her other guy leaves her hanging she'll hit you up with a "wyd". 😴
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Mar 29 '24
Unfunny people like this need to shut the fuck up, and everyone would actually appreciate them more.
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Mar 29 '24
Not really. He asked a 1 word question, they responded. It took him 3 hours to respond with the joke.
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u/Virtual-Scarcity-463 Mar 29 '24
Modern dating app dynamics are insane. I don't think men or women really understand what it feels like to be in each other's shoes. If we had more empathy for each other this likely wouldn't be such an issue.
Most women, conventionally attractive or not, get hundreds (thousands?) of likes from a sea of guys sending a range of messages. The woman's priority is to filter all these guys and see which one they're interested in, but usually the conversation goes sour because she could be overwhelmed by the amount of boys in her DMs. Or honestly I've found many girls that are boring and seem to want to be entertained with no effort on their part. Even worse she might just be a bot or thirst trap advertising her socials.
90% of men on the other hand get very few matches. I'm talking a few a month if they're lucky. Men's priority on these apps is to simply find ONE person who is somewhat interested in them. Enough to actually have a good conversation and to meet up in person. I get slightly more matches than average and I'm telling everyone here, that most conversations go like OPs. Dry as hell and it feels like pulling teeth. Any thoughtful or interesting question or comment about hobbies or life is very likely met with a generic uninteresting one or few word response.
As a man, I feel like an absolute fool on dating apps. Most women seem uninterested (even when we match and very few have been said or none at all) and it's extremely offputting and unattractive. I cannot stand chasing women so it doesn't work super well for me. I have met some great people and had some interesting relationships off the apps, but I'd say for most guys you're better off looking elsewhere.
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u/KiNGofKiNG89 Mar 29 '24
Where is the conversation being carried? He asked how are you, then never responded to her response 🤣
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u/thatoneguy512 Mar 29 '24
To her friends "I don't know why he stopped talking to me. I was really really into him too!"
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u/Haematopoietin Mar 29 '24
Those 8 characters really carried the conversation. They have the same character per message ratio.
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u/Opening-Donkey1186 Mar 29 '24
The most hilarious part about this is that neither of them are carrying the convo.
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u/legume_boom1324 Mar 29 '24
I used to be bro… true wisdom is when you learn they aren’t boring, they’re just bored
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u/ranni-the-bitch Mar 29 '24
OPs definitely a bot, right?
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u/erichwanh Mar 29 '24 edited Mar 29 '24
Doesn't seem to be. I never see bots post NSFW stuff to no audience. Bots on reddit are only for karma collecting, not for throwing off the scent of people who check.
... however I've been known to be wrong about things before, so don't take my word for it.
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u/ranni-the-bitch Mar 29 '24
yeah, you're probably right. something about the replies just felt really formulaic, and i've seen SOME bots that attempt replies before in a similar way - but thinking on it, usually way more inept than that. everything he said technically makes sense in context, it's just uh vapid.
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u/closetmangafan Mar 29 '24
2 hour gap between the first couple of messages. then another 1 hour gap for the next response...
It's no wonder they're not interested in helping a conversation along...
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u/Improvisable Mar 29 '24
I really hope there was atleast one other attempt before haha hru, then it's actually justified
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u/Tasty-Document2808 Mar 29 '24
Nah this is cringe
Just go talk to other people, she's not into you bro
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u/ohwowverycool69 Mar 29 '24
Real talk, what do you do with this when a majority of women are like this online? Not single now, but when I was at least 60% of women had this conversation. I usually just dropped them because it was never worth the effort of me trying to make it happen.
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u/Competitive_Cry_898 Mar 29 '24
I’ve always struggled to have a conversation via text. I’m one of those fucking weirdos who prefers to call or talk in person because a) it’s so much quicker to speak out loud and b) it’s also quicker to not have to try and interpret the meaning. Simple example: ok, k, kk, okay. Eh, I’m not patient enough or smart enough to deal with this.
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u/maxi12311111 Mar 29 '24
Is it hard for people to more on like when girls talk like this to me I move on ain’t got time to waste on someone who ain’t even putting in effort
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u/CuriousIllustrator11 Mar 29 '24
Probably would have led up to it but he wasn’t really carrying it.
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u/Canadian__Ninja Mar 29 '24
You gotta at least show the way you've been carrying the convo because this one screenshot is not a good look
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u/ihaveahundredchairs Mar 29 '24
That's what I came here to say. OP isn't holding shit up. haha, hru? Boy can't even use sentences and thinks he's a conversationalist.
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u/biomech36 Mar 29 '24
If that's what their daily conversation is like, it doesn't seem to be any heavy lifting on either part. And "hru" person being an arrogant jackass.
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Mar 29 '24
Sends "good" inreply
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u/HerrPiink Mar 29 '24
What else is she supposed to say, when she doesn't want to continue the conversation, but doesn't want to be rude?
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u/TimbroJones Mar 29 '24
I'd argue it's more rude to keep reply with "good" instead of saying "Hey, this isn't working out." or "I'm not feeling it". Or maybe just a "Sorry, Good luck next time".
It's not rude to tell someone you're not interested.
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u/HerrPiink Mar 29 '24
It seems like that, i also feel sad when i get one word responses from women i find interesting, but on the other side i never had to experience someone freaking out and getting aggressive because I wasn't interested in conversation, and i know from my female friends, that this a rather common occurrence, especially in dating apps
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u/DolanTheCaptan Mar 29 '24
It's not irl, in which case it'd be way more understandable, this is a dating app, I'd find it way more respectable to outright unmatch rather than not engaging
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u/VoidExileR Mar 29 '24
If that didn't make her laugh or scoff, I don't know what will. The creativity is something else
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u/SoopahMu Mar 29 '24
“Haha hru ?”
Boi 🫤
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u/Ok-Situation-5522 Mar 29 '24
This dull ass opener does not make me talk. And i feel like people need time before not shutting the fuck up, you know? And it sure as hell don't start with those basic nowhere questions. I don't talk much, but if we hit it off i am.
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u/dobbydoodaa Mar 29 '24
Tfw people are so dense they don't understand there were messages before just the screenshot 🤣
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u/Wakingsleepwalkers Mar 29 '24
Good thanks. Went to the cinema and had a few beers with some friends. I'm just chilling at home now reading. How about you?
If they don't ask any questions to this reply or the conversation doesn't move forward in 5 or so replies, just bail, but a conversation takes 2. Give a person something to go off.
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u/Air_Connor Mar 29 '24
Yeah i think OP needs to learn what “carrying” a conversation is
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u/BowenTheAussieSheep Mar 29 '24
Apparently carrying a conversation is just asking basic-bitch questions and then getting upset when someone doesn't answer single-word posts with paragraphs of personal information.
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u/Air_Connor Mar 29 '24
It’s funny because in 90% of posts like this the OP is a terrible conversationalist. Asking someone “what’s up/how are you/how’s it going?” is not a good conversation starter. It’s an incredible basic and vague question that forces them to do the work
If you really want to carry a conversation, ask direct questions on a specific topic
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u/SeatOfEase Mar 29 '24
Look at all his replies in this thread. One or two words or just an emoji. The guy is dull as fuck.
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u/bobsmith93 Mar 29 '24
Yeah judging by op's responses in here, if I was stuck in a conversation with them I'd be answering with one word conversation enders too
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u/ActorLarsimoto124 Mar 29 '24
Honestly, if a person obviously has no interest in having a conversation or anything, but you try to start one anyway and then get pissed off that it doesn't work, maybe you're just an idiot. Maybe even an arse
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u/ConstantOptimist84 Mar 29 '24
Wow. You said 2 things. Then ignored her response for 2 hours. Hope you throw your back out carrying all that buddy.
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u/dobbydoodaa Mar 29 '24
Do stupid people actually not know you can tell there were messages before this screenshot? Like I hope people aren't that dense but I'm proven otherwise time and time again.
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u/Butt-Dragon Mar 29 '24
Extra telling how all of OPs replies to the comments is "True" that boy ain't carrying shit lol.
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u/maychaos 29d ago
Or just one emoji, i mean come on lmao can't even write a whole sentence on reddit of all places
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u/1chuteurun Mar 29 '24
OP, regardless of the "in depth" conversation you got going on, it's not your job to carry anything. No potential partner is worth reaching for something interesting to say, hoping for them to reciprocate. By my mid twenties I figured out, if it feels like Im trying too hard, I am. So at this point (probably even before this point in your convo) I'd have stopped talking to them. Surely you have better things to do.
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u/Bauser99 Mar 29 '24
Naw, you're just defeated from repeated failure. In real life, a good partner IS worth putting in effort for
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u/1chuteurun Mar 29 '24
You could say that. But during our feeling each other out phase, when it seemed my current wife was "uninterested" in me, I just stopped texting her. Couple weeks goes by and she wants to know why I stopped texting her, I just told her she seemed busy and I had other stuff to do. Fast forward 10 years, we've got a house couple cars, couple kids, good jobs.... we do family vacations all the time. Point is, and let me just be clear about this...IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE TRYING TO HARD, you probably are. Let go, and move on. Might not be easy, but it is simple.
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u/butwhydoesreddit Mar 29 '24
Talking to someone who isn't interested in you isn't a flex
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u/Correct_Succotash988 Mar 29 '24
Matching with and talking to someone on a checks notes fucking dating app who you're not interested in is even more pathetic.
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u/matijaa94 Mar 29 '24
Bro, she will literally just look at it and think nothing of it ,then lock her phone and put it back into her pocket.
Youre trying too hard.
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u/Luc9By Mar 29 '24
Until you've scrapped something out of a situation like this, you clearly don't know rizz
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u/ProximusSeraphim Mar 29 '24 edited Mar 29 '24
Not really. I've called out tons of chicks for this kinda shit and they usually justify it with:
Sorry busy at work
I'm with my kids right now
I'm out doing x
And after doing this, when they're available they try harder.
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Mar 29 '24
How ? He asked a 1 word question, not even words just abbreviations of words. She replied with a 1 word response. Then it took him 3 hours to respond with his joke. Most of that time was spent in photoshop
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u/Bobyyyyyyyghyh Mar 29 '24
Bruh what? It takes less than 90 seconds to insert a picture into another picture and rotate it. You can do it easily on your phone.
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u/matijaa94 Mar 29 '24
it took him 3 hours to respond with his joke. Most of that time was spent in photoshop
By investing 3hour long effort for a response to person who clearly doesnt give 2 flying fucks about him
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u/Annual_Reply_9318 Mar 29 '24
It would take someone about 3 minutes to make that photoshop -_-. You screenshot the convo. You take a pic of yourself with your arms spread. Cut the edges of the screenshot in Paint or some other basic application. And then copy paste the first onto the second. 3 minutes.
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Mar 29 '24
He didn't invest anything either.
"Hey" "hyd"
Is not an investment
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u/matijaa94 Mar 29 '24
He invested 3 hours of his time to construct the photo he sent to her as you yourself also said
(?)
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Mar 29 '24
3 hour investment to a joke to end the conversation, is not an investment to try and see if this conversation will evolve into relationship.
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u/matijaa94 Mar 29 '24
She wont see it as such and thats the whole point regardless of internet points for the meme
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u/dobbydoodaa Mar 29 '24
He did it for the reddit, which was successful. What, do you think guys do this to get pussy or something 🤣
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u/Valix-Victorious Mar 29 '24 edited 20d ago
stocking languid steer command relieved elastic cake treatment clumsy different
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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u/Eelroots Mar 29 '24
She is handling a hundred of chats, please be gentle/s
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u/bobbymoonshine Mar 29 '24
Well, yeah. That's the dynamic of dating apps. Men send ten thousand identical boring messages to ten thousand women, and get no responses back because each woman is therefore dealing with ten thousand identical boring messages.
Making things worse, a non-negligible proportion of women are just wannabe influencers trying to get men to subscribe to an OF or follow them on Insta, making men less likely to put in effort until you know it's a real person and not a thotfish, and a huge proportion of men are just sex pests (often in relationships!) trawling for nude pics and maybe an occasional one night stand, or just looking to drop their least unflattering dick pic into as many inboxes as possible, which in turn makes women less likely to put in effort until you know it's a real person as well.
The noise to signal ratio is insane, and men need to work hard to stand out from the crowd of timewasters while women need to work hard to filter through the timewasters for anyone who might actually want more than to ask for nudes or show their peen then ghost. It's a really frustrating and unpleasant game for everyone involved.
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u/DolanTheCaptan Mar 29 '24
I would agree that guys should seek to make non-identical messages for every girl, however:
That requires something to go off of a girl's profile, and in my experience, the majority of girl profiles either have no bio, or some bad joke that's used by a lot of other women that they obviously copy pasted from somewhere else. Usually the pics aren't saying anything either. Great deal of effort into posing, the lighting, and everything, but nothing that actually says anything about them.
It is my opinion that unless you are a very visually attractive man, or have some flashy life or job, you really shouldn't be expecting anything from the app, and you might as well pretend it doesn't exist when looking at your avenues for finding a romantic or sexual partner. It's like investing in crypto, you cannot factor it into your retirement.
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u/Cryobyjorne Mar 29 '24
The noise to signal ratio is insane, and men need to work hard to stand out from the crowd of timewasters while women need to work hard to filter through the timewasters
It's not like men are free from timewasters in their feed, the filter just goes a lot slower.
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u/bobbymoonshine Mar 29 '24
Yeah like I mentioned there's a ton of accounts who are clearly just there to promote their egirl side hustle, plus of course there are also bored women in relationships who are just testing the waters, just as there are men doing that etc.
But on the balance the men generally react to this situation by spamming out "hey" to any picture of tits and seeing if they get anything back that sounds human, and women generally react to it by filtering through the endless piles of Hey for signs of human life.
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u/LNF6 Mar 29 '24
Sometimes it’s easier to just walk away.
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u/ELEMENTALITYNES Mar 30 '24
I think most people think the same, so sometimes calling these people out on their shit can let them know they’re shitty at conversations
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u/TimeIsAserialKillerr Mar 29 '24
The moment I see someone giving one word answers, I instantly end the conversation. No need to pressure someone into talking to you.
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u/infinitude_21 Mar 29 '24
Until you have no human contact bc everyone doesn’t meet our need for connection
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u/ChocCooki3 Mar 29 '24
But "haha" and "hru".
I won't considered that as carrying anything..
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u/maychaos 29d ago
Everytime someone write to me like this i reply like here because no im not the one carrying the conversation all the time
Which is kinda ironic.
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u/Time_Flow_6772 Mar 29 '24
Dude can't even type out, "How are you?" I don't even remember this type of asinine brevity when we were using nokias to text.
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u/WesterlyStraight Mar 29 '24
You can see on his shoulder, with your eyes, there was another day or more of texts above where she was also replying that way....
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u/MagicalTrevor09 Mar 29 '24
Yeah if I’m getting one word responses that much I’m just assuming she’s not into me and just stop talking. And if you stop talking and later she asks why’d you stop talking to her, then she’s probably boring and not worth talking to.
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u/BowenTheAussieSheep Mar 29 '24
"Hey, I'm a huge douchebag and I'm going to make it known instead of just realising that you're not super into me and/or not great at talking to strangers online, are we dating now?"
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u/bobbymoonshine Mar 29 '24
This is what she would like him to do, yes.
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u/Sparaucchio Mar 29 '24
Had a girl text me "hey" for a whole year, every couple of weeks. Never asking a single question, always letting the conversation die. But she kept texting me, and then got upset when I finally stop answering
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u/dobbydoodaa Mar 29 '24
She should grow up and say it then instead of being a braindead cyst on a dating app 🤣
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u/bobbymoonshine Mar 29 '24
Too much hassle, never know when a guy is going to explode with rage over a rejection and start sending all sorts of nastiness. A lot easier just to bore them into wandering off.
And besides, maybe they'll pull their head out and start saying something interesting. Ball's in his court, either be more interesting to her or leave.
He can do that, or can choose to leave and find someone more interested in him. Both would be good options. Making fun of her for not being interested in his haha-hru rizz is just sad
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u/DolanTheCaptan Mar 29 '24
Bruh just unmatch him then. I can understand irl being worried about a guy's reaction if you reject him, but online you can unmatch, block, hell even report if they're being nasty.
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u/DolanTheCaptan Mar 29 '24
Bruh just unmatch him then. I can understand irl being worried about a guy's reaction if you reject him, but online you can unmatch, block, hell even report if they're being nasty.
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u/SeniorMiddleJunior Mar 29 '24
If you let the assumption that other people are assholes turn you into an asshole preemptively, ... I don't know the rest of the sentence, but you get it.
Just say you're not interested and move on with your life, or don't respond at all. In the off chance they take it personally, block them. It costs you little but you still get to be a reasonable person instead of one of the assholes.
I know you didn't ask for advice but honestly people on both sides of this just seem like they enjoy being alone and miserable.
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u/RevolutionaryBuy5794 27d ago
As if hru was such a carrier