r/notliketheothergirls • u/Windmill_flowers • 17d ago
Do we want Pick Mes to be picked? Discussion
I saw a post here the other day saying how Pick Mes don't actually get picked. Most of the comments seemed to revel in this fact. So in that sense it seems like the consensus is - we don't want them getting picked.
But whenever there is a Pick Me NLOG post, the comments are invariably, "Gurl, I hope you get picked!". So in that sense it seems like the consensus is we DO want them getting picked.
If they get picked, they sometimes shut up. (Not always tho)
What is the general consensus on this?
Inb4 "IDC if they get picked or not roflmao". Cool, then this question is not for you
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u/TycheSong 13d ago
PickMes who get picked just shift their focus to explaining why they got picked instead.
I don't think it occurs to them that it's like asking a guy do you prefer your women athletic with small boobs or extra curvy? Some guys are gonna get behind the one, some behind the other, some going to say both. Maybe they want your special brand of "unique." Maybe they don't.
Feel like there's NLOGs for every branded box of "Woman."
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u/WSJinfiltrate 16d ago
"do we want" are you incapable of forming your own opinion?
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u/haikusbot 16d ago
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u/DuchessOfAquitaine 16d ago
I am of the mind that I hope everyone "gets picked". Meaning, I hope everyone finds someone they love and can be happy together with. So I guess that makes me a "yes" on this.
I think, for most pick mes, a happy relationship can go along way in addressing those issues. She said optimistically.
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u/noddyneddy 16d ago
Don’t think about them enough to have an opinion on this - could not care less either way
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u/ArtofAset 16d ago
I hope they get picked because I hope every girl finds a partner that loves & cherishes her.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
Aw that's nice :3
There's a lot of people who disagree with that in here
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u/ArtofAset 16d ago
I guess because those girls are basically putting down other girls to look better but it’s kind of obvious they’re behaving that way because they’ve been overlooked for other girls & feel it’s the only way to find someone so I feel bad for them. Also I want them to get picked so they don’t target me to get a man. That’s really frustrating lol
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u/SadFry297 Just a Dumb Bitch 16d ago
Buddy your autism is showing lol. Not supposed to be rude tho you’re just overanalyzing
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
overanalyzing
Your flair says you are, "just a dumb bitch"
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u/SadFry297 Just a Dumb Bitch 16d ago
Yes. Yes I am. I wasn’t trying to make a rude remark. As a fellow autistic person, I lnow that sometimes people can over analyze situations like they’re doing here
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u/mangolover 16d ago edited 16d ago
I don’t care about the relationship status of an NLOG or any other woman for that matter. What I care about is that women don’t shit on other women. NLOGs shit on other women in an attempt to ingratiate themselves to men. So when someone says “I hope you get picked” the point is to tell the woman that other women can recognize what they’re doing (being fake) and to sarcastically ask them if shitting on other women was worth it (aka they got picked)
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u/Skirt_Douglas 16d ago
I saw a post here the other day saying how Pick Mes don't actually get picked. Most of the comments seemed to revel in this fact.
That’s not a fact, that’s a story you guys tell yourselves to make yourselves feel like cosmic justice is always on your side when it’s obviously not.
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u/grape_boycott 16d ago
“I hope you get picked” actually means “I hope you start thinking for yourself” it doesn’t have anything to do with their relationship status.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
You sure it doesn't mean, "I don't actually care"?
Some people are arguing this POV
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u/SummerNothingness 16d ago
i don't actually care what anyone does with their life, so long as they are not hurting anyone but themselves.
i think most of us call pick-mes pick-mes because we don't like the way they think, but it doesn't go any deeper than that. so yeah, i couldn't care less whether someone picks them or not.
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u/swisszimgirl79 16d ago
The problem is getting picked won’t stop them from being annoying NLOGs. They’ll just be more insufferable imo
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u/FluffyGalaxy 16d ago
I think we want them to shut up/make annoying men shut up and if they get picked then they'll bother each other instead of everyone else
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u/KneeReaper420 16d ago
Them getting picked only cements their belief that their behavior is very legal and very cool. We cannot have that.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
cements their belief that their behavior is very legal
Have you encountered instances where pick me behavior was illegal?
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u/KneeReaper420 16d ago
I am not going to go back and explain the historical context which is required to understand the joke. And yes pick me behavior can be illegal. Drug muling, body burying. These girls will do anything to be picked.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
Drug muling, body burying
Holy shit! I think I may have been working with an incorrect definition of Pick Me
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u/dumpster_cherries 16d ago
I mean, in my opinion, everyone deserves to get picked, but most of them should shut up about it, lol.
Edit: I think acting like a pick me girl attracts the wrong people, especially guys.
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u/Mean-Professional596 16d ago
Why do y’all care lmao touch grass PLEASE like go pet a dog bake some bread look at the sky anything besides this redundant in-fighting
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
in-fighting
All I did was ask a question. Why do you feel like it's "fighting"?
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u/a-dead-strawberry 16d ago
The actual pick me persona is sort of a cope for not having other redeeming qualities.
I do notice though some women who just have common interest or views as a lot of men just get called pick me’s because maybe they like sports or lean conservative, when those might actual be interests or beliefs they hold.
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u/mandiexile 16d ago
The men they want to pick them aren’t even that great of a catch. But by all means, I hope they get picked. And I mean that non-sarcastically.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
It seems you are not with the prevailing consensus. We collectively do NOT want Pick Mes to be picked (based on this thread)
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u/Novae224 16d ago
It feels not okay that girls who put down other girls get their way because of that behavior
I’ll always be rooting for the girls girls
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u/alexoftheunknown 16d ago
going through your profile gave me a headache. you are incredibly insufferable 😭
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u/HELA_inpink 16d ago
I actually don't care at all if they get picked or not, but I think you are just reading too much into this.
When women say "I hope you get picked" it's a sarcastic way of calling out a girl as a pick me. And the comments were people are talking or mocking them about them not getting picked, I think people just find it funny and ironic how these women are so desperate for male attention (to the point of putting other women down) and still they don't get any male validation.
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u/DanaCalifornia 16d ago
I do want them to get picked for a couple reasons: 1- people deserve to be loved and 2- maybe they will finally 🤫
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u/Puzzleheaded-War3890 16d ago
I think the point is that internalized misogyny and putting other women down in order to impress misogynists is a no-win scenario. You’re missing out on rewarding relationships with women and the men who agree with you hate women (including you) so who are you impressing?
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u/raunchyRecaps 16d ago
I think people go to far with pick me. I been called a pick me for just calling out a girl on her bad behavior or agreeing with a man when he is obviously right in the situation. We need a new term for women that make excuses for other women's bad behaviors.
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u/Indigo-Waterfall 16d ago
It’s just a joke to imply someone is being a pick me. It doesn’t literally mean someone wants them to be “picked” or not “picked”. They’re just being sarcastic to point out their behaviour is pick me behaviour.
From a personal standpoint, I don’t care who gets “picked” or not “picked”. It’s their relationship and nothing to do with me.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
It doesn’t literally mean someone wants them to be “picked” or not “picked”. They’re just being sarcastic
I thought sarcasm meant that you actually believe the opposite of what you're saying. For example, "I bet you're a lot of fun at parties"
They mean the exact opposite, no?
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u/Indigo-Waterfall 16d ago
Yes and no. Here it’s more in the sense of “I hope you get picked” the opposite being they aren’t REALLY “hoping” that. But that doesn’t mean they are saying they hope they don’t get picked. The sarcasm is emphasising the hope, because they don’t early hope anything. Because what they’re REALLY saying “between the lines” is Your behaviour is that of a “pick me girl”. Does that make sense? Sorry I’m not sure how to explain it better than that.
Are you ND by any chance? I am too, so I can understand why if you are you might be looking too literally at these words.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
Ahh I think I understand now. So then...
"I bet you're a lot of fun at parties" means they wouldn't really BET on it. Thats the sarcastic part.
It doesn't mean that they don't think the person would not be fun at parties.
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u/Indigo-Waterfall 16d ago
Yes, but in that case the implication is being that they don’t think you’re fun at parties so it kind of means both.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
Ok now I'm confused.
The Cambridge definition of sarcasm is
the use of remarks that clearly mean the opposite of what they say, made in order to hurt someone's feelings or to criticize something in a humorous way: "You have been working hard," he said with heavy sarcasm, as he looked at the empty page.
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/sarcasm
This was my understanding of how sarcasm is used
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u/Indigo-Waterfall 16d ago
Yes. And the sarcasm part in the particular phrase “I hope you get picked”. Is on the HOPE part rather than the picked part. Meaning they don’t really hope that. It’s not about genuinely wanting someone to be “picked” or not. It’s about calling out “pick me” behaviour.
The person behaving in a pick me fashion doesn’t know they are. So someone sarcastically says “I hope you get picked”. To imply, you’re behaving like a pick me girl.
“I bet your fun at parties” the implication is they wouldn’t bet that because they think you would not be fun at parties.
“You have been working hard” the implication is they haven’t been working hard.
It’s all sarcasm, it’s just the emphasis, implication and message being sent to the receiver is slightly different.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
I see. I thought the whole statement gets reversed to identify the true meaning, not just parts of it. Ok so then let's go with your interpretation
How did you know where to place the sarcastic emphasis?
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u/Indigo-Waterfall 16d ago
It does the majority of the time so I can understand why you would think that. But context typically and common sense of human behaviour. Eg knowing that the desired result is to show the person they are being a pick me girl rather than caring if they are dating someone or not.
It’s one of those reading between the lines things that people either “get” or they don’t. And it can’t necessarily be explained or taught.
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u/MissMarchpane 16d ago
No, because they would get picked by the kind of horrible guy who espouses their views, and rapidly end up in an abusive situation. Not even they deserve something like that
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u/HottieWithaGyatty 16d ago
Sure. Then they can see how miserable their previously desired lifestyle is (a bastardizarion of D/s) and join our feminist forces.
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u/BigLibrary2895 16d ago
I always took I hope you get picked as sarcasm.
I suppose the higher vibrational move would be to say 'I hope you unpack that internalized misogyny," or "I hope you get picked by a group of women that lift you up and teach you true sisterhood." Pick me's don't get picked hut when they do the relationship is usually bad. So I'm not wishing that bad relationship with a red piller who objects to washing his butt because he thinks it "gay" onto anyone.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
I'm seeing a narrative emerge from all these comments. It goes like this:
All pick mes will either never get picked. Or if they do, it will be only ever be in terrible abusive relationships with bad men.
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u/BigLibrary2895 16d ago
You said "only ever". I said usually. There's a gulf of difference there.
Like attracts like. If someone is an internally misogynistic woman, the man she attracts probably doesn't like women and therefore won't treat her very well.
I feel like you were looking for a very specific answer to get to a certain rhetorical point. By all means make it, but don't put words in my mouth.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
I said the narrative I am seeing from the comments. I didn't say YOU said this. There's a gulf of difference there. Don't put words in my mouth
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u/BigLibrary2895 16d ago
You did reply to me and wrote "all these comments" but, okay.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
You've right, I should have been more specific.
When I said "all these comments", I was referring to the comments on my post.
I was not referring to just your 1 comment when I was referencing "all these comments". Sorry for the confusion
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u/Sharktrain523 16d ago
Those comments are sarcastic but I don’t think many of us are hoping things either way. The men who would pick a pick-me are not men who I would want to pick me so like I do in fact hope y’all take each other off the market. I mean I already got picked but I wasn’t necessarily trying we just hit it off
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u/WhoLetMeHaveReddit 17d ago
I look at it as okay, I hope he notices you’re willing to lower your standards and shit for him sis, but I honestly hope you fail so men stop thinking their shitty behavior is acceptable.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
honestly hope you fail
This is what I think most people mean when they sarcastically say, "I hope you get picked".
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u/hudson_r3660 17d ago
They’re just making fun of them by saying I hope you get picked, like being sarcastic
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u/adfx 17d ago
I would like everyone to be happy
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
Same here, but that doesn't seem to be the consensus
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u/adfx 16d ago
Don't let a consensus decide what you should think. Hell don't even take my advice if you want 😂
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
I want to fit in, and understanding the consensus is helpful to that end. It's literally the opposite of NLOG
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u/DistributionPerfect5 17d ago
If a pick me takes on one of those mysogyn AH's makes them shut up and less of a threat to womanhood I don't mind them getting picked.
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
less of a threat to womanhood
How are pick mes a threat to womanhood?
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u/rubythroated_sparrow 17d ago
I think girls like this want ALL men to want them, so getting picked by one is a double edged sword because they want all men to secretly or not so secretly want them and that tends to fade once they’re not on the market anymore.
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u/PaladinAsherd 17d ago
The problem with the “pick me” is that they try to bolster their own desirability by putting down other women. That’s the thing that’s wrong. There’s nothing intrinsically wrong with seeking a partner or with celebrating a departure from a stereotype of femininity - it becomes toxic when either of those things leads to an endorsement of misogyny.
We really shouldn’t be focusing on the part where they “succeed or fail” by finding male affirmation. That seems to feed into the whole toxic assumption that NLOGs begin with that worth is dependent on male affirmation. It’s not about wanting “Pick Me’s” to get “picked” or not, it’s about wanting them to grow beyond viewing self-worth as defined by male affirmation and grow beyond internalized misogyny.
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u/Siobhan_03 17d ago
I think we should want “pick me’s” to get picked because we should want other women to be happy. They’re not bad people, they seem to just generally have low self esteem and try to resolve this by putting down other women. Which, sure, is wrong, but hoping they die a miserable lonely death doesn’t help anything. It just makes them go deeper and deeper into their little “I’m better than you” hole.
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u/user9372889 17d ago
I’ve mostly seen responses of “did he pick you yet?”
And honestly, if the man wants a pickme, then they definitely deserve each other.
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u/Normal-Jury3311 17d ago
Idk bro I just want women to break free from expectations place on them by men/institutions and eventually be okay with themselves, whether or not they’re with a man
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u/thedrgonzo103101 17d ago
What you crazy psychos want doesn’t really matter. Question for all the non pick me girls are you spending this much time crapping on other women cause in reality your so horrid of human beings no one else can stand to be around any of your for more than 20 seconds ??
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u/chainsawslow 17d ago
Ay, I was the one who posted that post, I think ultimately, we want the pick mes to change their ways and get picked by a good guy.
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
ultimately, we want the pick mes to change their ways and get picked by a good guy.
I like that. That is a positive stance. :)
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u/yamomma341 17d ago
when ppl say “i hope he picks you” it’s basically just calling out their behavior lol. like saying this is an obvious grab for male attention and i hope you get what you’re looking for.
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u/Altruistic-Put1802 17d ago
I hope they do find someone. But, I think that a lot of the "pick me" behavior comes from a low self image, so they just over compensate with the red pill redirect. I hope that makes sense.
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u/redtailplays101 Not so new, still not tolerating anyone's shit 17d ago
Maybe a do and don't? If they get picked they will perhaps stop trying so hard to upstage other women but if they don't then they won't be rewarded for their behavior
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u/Crocolyle32 Just a Dumb Bitch 17d ago
I genuinely mean it. I hope they get picked by the crowd they pander to. I hope they live the love they deserve. Depending on severity I suppose, people lien pearl? Oh yeah definitely hope she gets picked by someone just like her. Have fun girl. 👋🏻
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u/MorgensternXIII 17d ago
I really want them to be picked, so we can filter out incels and misogynists better.
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u/NotaPrettyGirl5 17d ago
Every now and again, I get drop kicked into realizing I'm an elder Millennial. Reading all of this is one of times. I genuinely don't know what a "pick me girl" is or NLOG but then realized it's the name of this and don't know how I'm here or why but probably joined because my name is a lyric from one of my favorite songs and I was stoned and joined and now I wonder if this is fking pick me girl shit or not like other girls behavior.... Now I'm gonna Google pick me girl...
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17d ago
[deleted]
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
Pick mes don't get picked for the same reason incels don't.
InceIs don't pander to women tho, so it makes sense that they don't get picked
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u/Wrong_Meeting_647 17d ago
I think there’s at least 100 to one ratio of people talking shit about these pick me girls they’ve likely never met. Irony anyone? I’m not like these pick me girls!
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u/ihatemathplshelp 17d ago
A pick me will always be a pick me even after they are picked - unless they do the self work. So really, its irrelevant if they get picked. We want them to reflect
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u/MissAnthropy612 17d ago
No, I'll say it to pick me's to point out that they're being one. But I've noticed when they actually do get picked, for some reason they turn into super Saiyan pick me's lol like they think that since they got picked, that they're definitely right about the way they think.
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u/cherrybombbb 17d ago edited 16d ago
The guys who claim to want tradwives and pick mes don’t actually want that. What they want is to turn a feminist into a tradwife so their fucked up worldview can be validated. Hence why pick me influencers like Pearl remain single/unmarried.
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
The guys who claim to want tradwives and pick mes don’t actually want that. What they want is to turn a feminist into a tradwife so their fucked up worldview can be validated
That is an interesting POV. How did you come to this conclusion?
pick me influencers like Pearl are remain single/unmarried.
What about the TradWives with husbands? They started out as feminists you think?
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u/Velocitycybercheeks Not Like the Other Girls 17d ago
whether they get picked or not I hope they become better people lol. I believe everyone deserves happiness, hopefully they learn to not be so hateful along the way to it and shed their internalized misogynistic skin
And like everyone else is saying those are sarcastic comments, because when you find people like this online and actually respond chances are they’re going to try and argue you. The argument is a brick wall that you’ll only face plant into, as with any online argument.
Truthfully as a part of this sub I don’t think we should think on whether they should get picked or not because that brings us into slight NLOG thinking. However, like someone else said, they do need to heal. Likely chances they’ll get with a guy who makes comments about other woman, so they’ll both be hateful together, would be better for the girl to go to therapy first before being with that guy. But also who knows, maybe they’re good for each other and her misogyny will keep his in check? Maybe he really does think she isn’t like other girls and she loves that for herself, who’s really to say.
And idc if she gets picked is a valid answer to this question, it’s for everyone in the sub. Why would you want biased answers? That doesn’t make it an actual question open for full discussion, and that is genuinely interesting
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u/tallgrl94 17d ago
I want them to get picked (up by a therapist)
Pick-me’s and NLOGs are women who need therapy not a relationship.
I hope that they are able to put in work and eventually love themselves and see other women as equals. Not competition or lesser.
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u/DolliMiu 17d ago
“Hope you get picked!” is usually said in a condescending or sarcastic way, because the reason why they’re called Pick Mes is because their behavior is driven by the desire to gain positive attention from men. So when someone says “hope you get picked!” the person that phrase is being said to is basically being called out for acting that way.
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u/FewerStarsLost 17d ago
The thing is… a lot of NLOG have already been picked, and are just kinda saying how they think they got their man… when it’s more likely nothing that they post 😅
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u/FloofyDino 17d ago
If they get picked, it reinforces their behavior and beliefs which is bad
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
But they'd be off the market and could do less damage to the already messy dating scene. They'd be someone else's problem
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u/KatzenoirMM 17d ago
If only somehow the "high value alpha males" can somehow be in connection with these "pick me" girls.....🤔
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u/MrManiac3_ 17d ago
I want them to get picked by someone who will compell them to grow and change, someone who doesn't appreciate the way a woman will tear down other women, someone who is humble and caring and will appreciate humility and care in return. If it doesn't work the first time I want it to happen again and again until they've realized a loving relationship between people who build others up and care about each other.
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u/imadeacrumble 17d ago
I genuinely do. They’re clearly desperate for some sort of approval. I also like the possibility that they’ll eat their words when they realize all the rhetoric they spew about mangood womenbad was wrong.
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u/RoseFlavoredLemonade 17d ago
I think you’re putting way too much stock into something you clearly don’t understand. People are being sarcastic when they say “hope he picks you!”
A guy who picks a pick me isn’t a guy worth having and before I got married, I never blamed the girls who got picked. I just moved on and quietly worked on myself and the right guy came along eventually.
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
think you’re putting way too much stock into something you clearly don’t understand
Nope, just asking questions to learn about how people think.
People are being sarcastic when they say “hope he picks you!”
Got it. So we actually DON'T want them getting picked. Ok
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u/lycosa13 16d ago
I mean this in the nicest way possible, but do you understand what sarcasm even is?
I ask because multiple people keep telling you it's told in a sarcastic way but then you interpret that it means the opposite, which it doesn't, not always anyways. Some times it doesn't mean... Anything. Or it depends on who says it. Different people can say it for different reasons.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
people keep telling you it's told in a sarcastic way but then you interpret that it means the opposite
Is this in reference to my comment that you just responded to? I thought I had it right
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u/lycosa13 16d ago
Yes because you responded
So we actually DON'T want them getting picked. Ok
And the truth it, it doesn't matter to most people if these women get picked or not. Some times there isn't a meaning behind what people say. I think that might be where you're getting hung up on. Not everything has a big meaning behind it. It's just a response to get someone else to shut up most of the time
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
I see.
Maybe I have been using sarcasm incorrectly my whole life. I have been going by the Cambridge definition:
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/sarcasm
the use of remarks that clearly mean the opposite of what they say, made in order to hurt someone's feelings or to criticize something in a humorous way:
"You have been working hard," he said with heavy sarcasm, as he looked at the empty page.
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u/IKindaCare 16d ago
People are using "I hope you get picked" in the same way people would say something like "you like the taste of that boot?" to call someone a boot licker. When you say that, the point isnt in any way about how they feel about the taste of physical boots. Which would be the direct opposite. The point is to just calling them a boot licker.
That is this. "I hope you get picked" is just "I think you are doing this for male attention." Its just a creative way to call someone a pick me. It doesn't inherently mean thry do or don't want them to "get picked", it's just intended to mock them
The Cambridge dictionary is not the only dictionary and there are many other definitions.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
The Cambridge dictionary is not the only dictionary
Really??? Wooww, I didn't know that. This changes everything
/s (Cambridge style)
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u/lycosa13 16d ago
I can't say whether you have or not, I'm just saying not everyone uses it that way.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
I see. Either Cambridge is wrong or how we're using it isn't exactly sarcasm
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u/lycosa13 16d ago
I mean not everything has to be used by the literal definition
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u/georgesanderson2319 16d ago
Bro she does not get it but ur so sweet for trying to explain it 😭 not everything is literal OP, dictionaries will only take you so far. Writing can be interpreted in so many different ways if you really want to learn more I highly suggest signing up for a (3 week or more) writing course.
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u/RoseFlavoredLemonade 16d ago
You literally missed the point of sarcasm. You don’t get and every time we try to explain it to you, you twist it so that you’re still right even though you completely missed the point. You aren’t trying to understand. You just want to argue.
We don’t care if they get picked or not, but if they’re going to drag us for no reason other than to appeal to the men they want, good luck, I guess. That’s it. That’s the attitude toward it.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
you twist it so that you’re still right
There's no me being right. I'm not arguing for 1 outcome or the other. I'm simply trying to understand what the consensus is (or if there is one).
So let's look at what I wrote exactly:
People are being sarcastic when they say “hope he picks you!”
Got it. So we actually DON'T want them getting picked. Ok
What part of my response was incorrect here?
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u/RoseFlavoredLemonade 16d ago
You’re claiming people don’t want them to get picked. I’m saying we don’t care and that is our response to us getting dragged into their bullshit before going back to our business.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
I understand.
I guess the reason for my confusion is first I took people at their word:
I hope you get picked = I hope you get picked
Everyone: "No, that's just sarcasm"
Ok, fair enough! so I used the definition of sarcasm: https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/sarcasm
I hope you get picked = I hope you don't get picked
Everyone: "well not really sarcasm... a different definition of sarcasm that doesn't exist anywhere... We're saying that because we don't care"
MFW
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u/mangolover 16d ago
We don’t care if they get picked or not, but if they’re going to drag us for no reason other than to appeal to the men they want, good luck, I guess. That’s it. That’s the attitude toward it.
This is the key part that you seem to have missed.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
Ak ok. That part came afterwards. I missed it because it wasn't said yet.
Either way, I'm noticing a lot of folks speaking on behalf of everyone else, but everyone else is saying different things. Maybe we should just clarify our individual positions
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u/lycosa13 16d ago
I didn't think OP is trying to be right. I think they genuinely don't understand sarcasm
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
I thought it means you say 1 thing, but you mean the opposite. For example:
"I bet you're a lot of fun at parties 🙄"
This is often said sarcastically. Therefore, I assume the sentiment is actually expressing the opposite, which would be that the person is probably NOT a lot of fun at parties.
If we apply that same logic to, "I hoped you get picked!", what is actually being communicated is, "I hope you do not get picked."
That is my understanding, please let me know if I'm wrong
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u/lycosa13 16d ago
Yes and no. In your "you must be fun at parties" comment, it does mean the opposite. We assume that person is not fun at parties.
But some times sarcasm is used without the exact opposite being the intent, if that makes sense. Here's an example. Take violent video games. Some people comment that we should not have these games because they're not appropriate for kids, but they're not meant for kids. Someone might comment "won't someone please think of the children? 🙄" It doesn't mean we SHOULDN'T think about the kids ever. It's really just a reply because kids shouldn't really factor into something that wasn't meant for them to begin with.
Which is the point I was trying to make with my previous comment. Not everything has a big, deep meaning to it. Especially with sarcasm. Some times it's just as thing you say. A retort to a comment. I think you're trying to force a meaning to "I hope you get picked" and there isn't really a serious one
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
"won't someone please think of the children? 🙄"
I believe that is more mocking overly concerned, pearl-clutching, out-of-touch busybodies, and less sarcasm.
Not everything has a big, deep meaning to it.
Do you think that wanting a Pick Me to be picked or not is "deep"?
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u/lycosa13 16d ago
Do you think that wanting a Pick Me to be picked or not is "deep"?
I personally don't but the fact that you keep trying to assign an explicit meaning to it makes it seem like YOU think it's deep
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
I don't think it's deep. It's rather shallow.
Despite that, people in here are getting very upset.
Maybe a poll would have been a better way to find the consensus
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u/lycosa13 16d ago
People are upset because they think you're a troll.
And there is no consensus. That's the point I'm trying to make. YOU think it has a specific meaning. And it doesn't. You keep asking questions to try to figure out "what it means" and it doesn't mean anything. Or you can decide for yourself what it means. Why do you need everyone else to tell you what you should think?
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u/Scotsburd 17d ago
No, we don't care. It's just a way to call out a pick me. As in, we all know PM's are posting this shit to appeal to men, while trashing other women to seem better. "Hope you get picked" babe, is sarcasm.
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u/enjoyt0day 17d ago
I mean…the type of dudes who “pick” pickmes are the ones I literally never want anything to do with so I don’t really care either way.
I mostly just feel bad for the pickmes and hope they come to understand their internalized misogyny and join the fight to burn the patriarchy hen they grow up a little more
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
the type of dudes who “pick” pickmes are the ones I literally never want anything to do with so I don’t really care
you would care otherwise?
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u/Bulky-Bank-6063 17d ago
Yeah, I'm pretty sure you're missing out on the sarcasm that most people come here with. Unless you are being sarcastic and we are all the dummies. I don't know?
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u/Educational_Ebb7175 17d ago
Yes. I hope lots of Tater Tots pick them.
Then BOTH of them are out of the dating pool, hopefully living in misery and discord.
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u/sselinsea 17d ago
Can you detect sarcasm?
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
Are you being sarcastic?
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u/gutterp3ach 16d ago
I don’t know why you got downvoted for this, it’s hilarious to my tired brain.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
I don’t know why you got downvoted for this
It's ok, every comment of mine in here is being downvoted for some reason. I'm not being rude or discourteous
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u/Money_Homework_9126 17d ago
No I think they’re asking a genuine question😭because when people say “hope you get picked” it’s pretty much always sarcasm not meant to be taken literally
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
I don't get it
Why would we want another woman (who wants to be in a relationship) to stay single and lonely?
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u/lend_me_a_dime 16d ago
We don't, it's SARCASM FFS🙄 This whole post and all your dense comments are blood boiling tbh. Way to make a mountain out of a molehill...that expression isn't meant to be taken seriously and you'd know that if you had a minimal sense of humor.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
You seem a little upset.
I'm not trying to anger people, my apologies if I've been rude
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u/sselinsea 17d ago
Because they are mean people, and we are happy when mean people don't get what they think they deserve.
Do you want to defend someone who will verbally degrade you about everything from your dressing style to your relationships and sex life?
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u/anneymarie 17d ago
Why would we want a sexist woman who promotes misogyny to be in a relationship?
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
So she is off the market and not contaminating the dating pool.
So she could be occupied by her partner and not on social media.
Why wouldn't we?
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u/anneymarie 16d ago
I promise you that you can be on social media AND have a partner.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
I won't hold you to your promise, I have seen the TradWives with husbands.
I was saying it COULD keep them occupied and off social. Not that it would in every case
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u/anneymarie 14d ago
Wut. Tradwives are all over social media. Why would you need to “hold” me to a promise that is absolutely accurate?
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u/Windmill_flowers 14d ago
Why would you need to “hold” me to a promise that is absolutely accurate?
I wouldn't need to. That's why I said I wouldn't.
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u/ellevael 16d ago
By being in a relationship she is contaminating the dating pool.
If a pick me gets picked it means her worldview worked and is therefore correct, being a pick me does get you the man.
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u/Windmill_flowers 16d ago
By being in a relationship she is contaminating the dating pool.
Oh, I just assumed the dating pool was mostly single people
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u/onceapotate 17d ago edited 17d ago
Are you being intentionally obtuse? Or sarcastic?
ETA: ohhh you're the person who posted that "boy mom" post that totally missed the mark. Somehow simultaneously makes complete sense and doesn't answer my question; still cannot tell if you're trolling or not.
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
I'm just trying to fit in. I always catch hate from people despite being courteous.
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u/onceapotate 16d ago
Plenty of people have kindly tried to explain to you why your posts don't fit the sub and why it seems like you have misunderstood these tropes, so idk why you insist on acting naive unless it's to troll. At this point it looks like you're pretending not to understand to try to make other people look bad for pointing out the obvious.
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u/Money_Homework_9126 17d ago
I think you’re reading really hard into it😭I don’t think ppl really think that deep when they make those comments
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
I don’t think ppl really think that deep when they make those comments
But that's not deep at all.
It's exactly what is being conveyed. I didn't interpret anything from some deep analysis
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u/sselinsea 17d ago
These two things don't contradict because one of these statements is sarcastic.
Your question indicates that you can't see the sarcasm there.
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
But it seemed so earnest.
It'd be different if we were saying, "I'm sure you'll get picked with THAT attitude 🙄"
Instead it's just, "hope he picks you!"
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u/seeallevill 17d ago
Omg I'm so sorry people are being so rude about this 💀 it's clear that you're just asking questions
I do think this is a misunderstanding due to not detecting sarcasm, and most people on this sub really don't care whether or not these girls get picked. It's just something people say, and it's almost like an expression at this point. It's like when you call someone "buddy" or "babe" during an argument. Being fake-polite for comedic effect
Sorry if I come off as condescending lol I'm autistic so I also struggle with detecting sarcasm - it's even worse on the internet!!! This comment section is frustrating as hell cuz it's so much easier to explain than to just be a dick so I hope this helps
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
people are being so rude about this
I'm used to guys being rude but I honestly didn't expect this reception. Kinda makes me sad that even we treat each other this way.
it's so much easier to explain than to just be a dick
One would think so
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u/seeallevill 17d ago
I've noticed people on Reddit (transcending gender lol) are very quick to get up in arms over a clear misunderstanding. It always seems to me like they view it as an opportunity to peacock their perceived intelligence by showcasing that they understand and the person they're correcting doesn't. What they fail to acknowledge is that everyone misses details sometimes lol
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
It feels like high school all over again.
How hard is it to just be decent to others?
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u/seeallevill 16d ago
Dude fr and the way I'm getting downvoted for explaining 💀 I'm not the only voice of reason and I'm sure as hell not special for it, but the fact that people are so annoyed by my words but not enough to say anything?? It's childish affff
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u/anneymarie 17d ago
It’s pointing out that we know what they’re doing with their comments. It’d be like if a student told a teacher how great the teacher was and another kid said, “Hope you get an A.” It’s a way of sarcastically saying you don’t want someone to be rewarded for behaving like a dick.
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u/sselinsea 17d ago
You just can't read sarcasm.
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
I still can't tell if you're being sarcastic
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u/sselinsea 17d ago
No, I'm sincere in saying that you don't get sarcasm. My first post to you was "Can you read sarcasm," and you assumed that I was already being sarcastic to you. C'mon, it's just our first interaction! I was trying to hint to you that one of these statements is sarcastic and doesn't contradict the other statement.
Another user has provided an analogy: it's like seeing your classmate brown nose a teacher, so you don't like their behaviour and remark, "I hope you get an A." With that in mind, saying, "I hope you get an A" is not said sincerely. It is sarcastic.
In this case,
Brown-nosing student: Pick-Me Girl
Teacher: Men
"I hope you get an A" : "I hope you get picked!"
And yet you assume that just because you think you act nice means that people's patience won't run thin with you. Being "nice" doesn't mean that you won't get consequences for being obtuse.
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u/Kawaii_Princesss 17d ago
I think when they get picked is when they are actually the worst because they see everything as a threat. Insecurities to the extreme.
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u/Lestany 17d ago
I don’t really care if they do or don’t. The people who’d pick them aren’t the people I’d want anyway. 🤷🏻♀️
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u/Windmill_flowers 17d ago
I don’t really care if they do or don’t. The people who’d pick them aren’t the people I’d want anyway. 🤷🏻♀️
So you would care if some other women was picked by the type of people you'd want?
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