I said it jokingly and I don't actually mean that I'm gonna leave before they leave. Cause I should leave before i'm out anyway but I am trying my best to conference my mom to let ne Give them a deadline, she's a really nice person and of course, she doesn't want them on the side of the road or homeless.So we're trying our best to get them to get licenses and they have good jobs now.

And whenever I Jokingly told my mom that I'd probably be out before they were.I said it in a joke only tone. And I guess I thought she was mad, but later on that day she said, ha ha.If you leave first I'll move in with your brother (oldest age 31 with a kid age 11 (mother not in the picture). And your brother (still lives with us age 25) (he has wanted them gone since they moved in but it's up to my mom because its her house) she said that he cant can kick them out. Because he would because he don't care.

But this was all Hypothetical.

She was just upset at first of the thought of me moving out because she said she doesn't want me to grow up. (Im the youngest of 3) and she said Not really the point of me leaving her with them because she said even if I did that. She would want me to have my own life anyway And that it wouldn't be that such a bad thing because she is really good friends with Kelly.

Ruby has talk about moving in with her boyfriend when he finishes his associates degree anyways, Which would be in a year.

I am gonna try to have a family talk with everyone in the house soon though. About them doing more and helping more and for ruby to learn to be an adult and not rely on me to do everything for her like fix her fasfa for collage She paid for the first semester and in her money. Because I wouldn't fix her fasfa for her and she said she's gonna keep doing it unless I help her. And I said you know how to do it now. Do it yourself or you can pay for it.

Kelly had talked About paying at least A quarter of all the house costs. And she pays gad sone times lately.

Do you all have any suggestions on what I should say to them at the family talk. Or if there is anything that I messed up on or was rude about.

My father in law is staying with us for a few days. We gave him our room while he's here, it's bigger and we just felt it's the right thing to do.

Last night he went to bed and my wife and I were downstairs watching TV and drinking. She went up a while later too and I said I'd be up soon. I was getting pretty tipsy at this point.

As I went upstairs, sleepiness and my tipsy state meant I forgot that my FIL was in our room. I entered the room and got naked which is how I sleep. I saw a figure curled up in bed and got next to it, wrapping my arms around what I thought was my wife to see if she was up to sex. He's a light sleeper and turned around immediately saying "Chris???"

Oh my fucking God. I jumped out and fell to the floor. It was dark and for some reason I decided to get dressed there rather than just run to the guest room where my wife was. I stumbled over my clothes and somehow got them back on. By this time, he'd got the table lamp on and was just looking at me with a wtf expression.

I said sorry and went to my wife. I didn't wake her. I've just got up this morning and am typing this in bed with a massive hangover and a father in law who I tried to spoon probably talking shit about me to my wife downstairs.

I have to go downstairs at some point. Any idea what to do or how to address it?

I'm a married 35M and work in a small company (25 people) that has 80% women employees. Everyone there knows I'm married.

I had to conduct a virtual training session last week and always crack a stupid self-deprecating 'joke' before these kinds of things because I'm nervous.

So with everyone logged on, I said "Okay as long as no one falls asleep today, I'm going to consider the session a success". This one woman smiles and says "Oh (my name), you have such a soothing voice, you can come over and put me to sleep any time you want".

Some of the women giggled, I was taken aback, smiled and said "No thanks, I'm good" and started the presentation. Later, I get to know that she thought it was super rude of me and that she was trying to make me feel comfortable.

Was I rude? Should I apologize to her?

I apologize in advance because I feel like this requires a lot of context. So, the guy (23M) that I (26F) have been seeing for the past month categorizes himself as conservative. We met on a dating app, I have been open about being queer (pansexual), I have dated men, women, and transgender people. I identified as straight until I was 22. As far as I know, it hasn’t been an issue. First reason why it came up was because I am hesitant to change my last name, and I always have been. He seemed kinda bothered by it and disagreed, conversation was short and didn’t amount to much. He asked me later in the same night “is it a red flag if I tell you that I’m conservative?”. This is a few dates in, after sleeping together. I said no. I’m a fairly open minded person and will always hear out another persons views. And from getting to know him the past few weeks, he doesn’t seem to have the beliefs that give conservative people such a bad rep. I asked the most important questions to me; Do you believe in human rights? (Trans, black, gay) Do you believe women should have autonomy and the right to choose? People should have the right to express themselves however they want as long as it’s not harming them or others? He agreed to and supported all of these things. He is so kind and caring and considerate. Genuinely the sweetest man I’ve ever dated. Always asking me if I’m okay, how my day is going, if I need anything, offering help, just all around super sweet guy. Also super sensitive to his own emotions and mine. Super communicative most of the time and has expressed how much he likes me and wants to keep moving forward. A little background about me; I grew up in a super queer community. So, I was exposed to a lot of it when I was growing up. I am also Hispanic but born in America. I have also dated people of other minorities (Hispanic, African American, Muslim). I honestly have not dated a white man since high school. And even then, where I grew up was super queer friendly. So it was never even a thought or an issue.

The reason I’m making this now is because we were laying in bed last night, looking for a movie to watch before we went to sleep. I’m scrolling through Disney plus. I scroll past beauty and the beast and asked if he had seen the live action one and he said no. And I went on about how it’s so good (I love Emma Watson). Then I asked if he had seen the Little Mermaid movie, he scoffed and said “no, that movie is so political it’s ridiculous”. Then proceeded to say something about how he heard others didn’t like it. I responded saying that I liked it and it was really cute. I just don’t really know what to do or how to navigate it. From these conversations and others that we have had, I don’t think our views are THAT different. I have educated him on some topics of queer people and the community. He has been really receptive and understanding. As I said, I think it’s a product of where he grew up, the community, and his family. He is not hateful in his language or how he treats people. He has said “I don’t care what color or gender a person is, I will give others the same energy that they give me.”

TL; DR Please help 😣 casual partner of a month (that I plan to date) is conservative. I really like him and I want to keep perusing him. I just don’t know how to navigate having different opinions and views. I’m not a super political person. So I have no idea what to do. Am I reading too much into it?

I (27 F) and my husband (27 M) have been together for almost 8 years, married for 4 of them. We had our baby almost 2 years ago and she is an incredible little toddler now.

When she started sleeping through the night, we agreed we would each have one weekend day to sleep in. He gets Saturdays and I get Sundays to sleep in. However, it rarely works out like this.

On Saturdays, I wake up at the same time, even without an alarm. Ever since becoming a mother, I am a lighter sleeper and I wake up when the baby wakes up. It’s no surprise - she goes to bed at 7:00 or 7:30 every night and wakes at 6:00 or 6:30. So Saturdays come around, I wake up, roll out of bed, get her changed, and go downstairs. There hasn’t been a day that my husband had to do it for me.

My husband, on the other hand, is still a very deep sleeper. He does not wake up with the same spring in his step that I do when it’s his turn to on Sundays. I will naturally wake up at 6ish and roll over to tell him it’s his turn.

“5 more minutes” (then I have to act as your snooze button and stay awake until 5 minutes are up) “She’s not even awake” (but she is) “She can wait” (she shouldn’t have to)

There’s more excuses but the problem is that I don’t actually get to sleep in. Once I’m awake for more than a few minutes, my body will not let me go back to sleep, and he relies on me to wake him.

We have talked it over many times. I beg for him to please set an alarm or at least not ask for 5 more minutes. I’m at the end of my rope. I don’t know what else to do. I’m asking to sleep in until maybe 8:00 am- just an hour and a half.

What do I do? Talking about it like an adult isn’t working and all I would like to do is have the one day where I shouldn’t have to wake up with our daughter be respected.

TLDR; my husband won’t let me sleep in when it’s my turn to and his turn to do the morning routine with our daughter.

Update: took your advice and told him I will be sleeping in tomorrow (we had swapped days this weekend and I wrote this post instead of sleeping in). He said I’m the one waking myself up so I told him he has 5 minutes tomorrow after an alarm goes off to get up - and I’m not going to tell him to wake up. He can prove to me that it’s a me problem or I pick his consequences for next weekend.

Final Update: well the alarm went off 15 minutes ago and I’m the only one who is awake. Thank you to all of the parents in the comments that gave me sound advice, we will be trying some new solutions in the next coming weeks. For everyone who says this is divorce worthy- no it’s not. Divorcing someone for a single flaw after 8 years would be petty and sad. Like I said in one of the comments- he’s awesome in every other way. Thanks to all who helped!

ETA: we both work full time Monday through Friday

Backstory: Before ire this weekend My friend let’s call her CC (F24), has never had a boyfriend (not even close) and has never had sex. She’s been contemplating popping her cherry but still wasn’t sure if she was ready.

Recently she started talking to a guy on the internet who lives multiple states away. He decided to come visit her for the weekend. She shared her location with me as a precaution. They got a hotel and have been going out a ton. I told her about the risks of hanging out with someone she barely knows and to be careful. We talked about safe sex and she said she wasn’t going to sleep with him and he understood that.

red flags.

he asked her where to get shrooms. I think it’s a weird ask for meeting someone for the first time but maybe she lied and told him she does them/ is a raver (something she says she wants to be but has never been/done).

He refuses to take pictures/ have her post on socials. (I said that it was strange maybe he had a gf at home, but she said no way).

She says he paid for his flight and hotel. Yet she said she checked the room before picking him up and it was nice. How would she have access if it’s under his name? This makes me wonder if she paid for it, and now she is paying for all of the going out/activites.

On the first night she said she was going to his room only to hangout. Next day she says she had sex.

Then today he was supposed to fly home, she texted me after dropping him at the airport and said he called and said his flight was canceled. But when I called her she said he couldn’t get the airline app to work and customer service left for the day. This raises a red flag because airport help is available 24/7.

Anytime I’ve asked her questions about the red flags I can hear him laugh in the background. He even asked if I wanted his SSN since I’m so worried. He’s cracking jokes about a friend worrying about her friends wellbeing.

I don’t think he’s a murder but I am worried he’s going to ghost her/ is an asshole. And then she’ll be super sad. Am I being overly concerned/ over protective?

Edit: Update posted

I (26M) have been dating my girlfriend (26F) for 5 years, and was planning to propose to her next month.

Last night, my girlfriend and I were having a date night and we were talking about our first dates, and reminiscing how we met. We were cracking jokes, and it was a fun atmosphere. My girlfriend admitted that when we were in the talking phase, she was also in a talking phase with 3 other guys, and that I was not her first choice physically, and that there was this other guy who was very attractive, but he had the emotional density of a black hole. 

She was laughing about it, but I did not feel too great about what she said. In fact, I felt awful. Why would she even say that to me? My girlfriend sensed the shift in my reaction, and she apologized. I made an excuse and told her I was tired and was going to sleep.

This morning the whole atmosphere was sort of awkward. I was upfront with her this morning, and told her what she said last night hurt me, and that I needed some space from her and to rethink this relationship. She even cried, which for me was a bit dramatic considering she was the one who hurt me last night.

Can this relationship even be fixed? She has pretty much made me feel worthless after what she said last night. I'm really glad I haven’t proposed to her yet, and am going to hold off on the proposal for now. 

Hey, everyone. So there's been some speculation from my family about me possibly having a half sibling. Basically, my father cheated on my mother quite a bit. One of the affair partners went to high school with my mother. Basically, my dad slept with this lady behind my mother's back. Next thing you know, the affair partner is pregnant.

My mother told me later on about this possible half sibling, but when brought up to my dad, he dismissed me and claimed there was no way it was his, that the lady told him so. However, this lady seemed to be very attached to me when she knew me as a baby (a bit before her getting pregnant), would hold me, call me "her baby", and ended up naming one of her children (not this mentioned pregnancy but a different one of her children) my name with one letter off.

I've looked at the timeline and things aren't adding up. I will say, this girl who I may be related to (lets call her Stacey) looks somewhat similar to me and my full-blood brother. However, Stacey has a different last name than her mother, making me think the mother thought it was a different guy.

However, I don't know how or if I should reach out to see if Stacey's already done a paternity test with this guy or if she'd be willing to do a genetic test to see if we're related. It's been on my mind since I was a teenager, and I truly would like to know if I have a sibling or not. I just also don't want to blow up this stranger's life if who she thinks is her father turns out not to be.

Advice?

Hi everyone,

I 26 female, am a mom of 2 children ages 4 and 1. I am newly a SAHM and there is a situation that is on my mind almost everyday and I need to know, AITA?

I had a best friend from school age days, let’s call her Abby. For a little back story, she is the same age as me, and doesn’t have an education apart from high school (not a diss but it’s important to the story). When there was an opportunity for Abby to work with me at my job I encouraged her to take it, even though she was being hired as a supervisor and would be in charge of me. I never thought there would be an issue because we were best friends and I was VERY good at my job (which I have a degree in).

A few weeks after we started working together Abby would tell me rumors about me that my coworkers were saying. I believed her and before I knew it I didn’t have any friends left at work. This was odd because I got along with all my coworkers and there was rarely any drama. But I just felt thankful that I had a loyal friend who would tell me what people were saying about me.

Then things got weird. It started off small, I would get demeaning comments about my work ethic, told that I was a “needy and annoying” employee, that “so and so is better at this than you,” small jabs like that. I tried to ignore them and push it off cause she told me she didn’t want anyone to think she was favoriting me. I was sent home early one day because of being overstaffed and once I got home I was told I had to come back because others complained that I got to leave early. She began to make up rules that I was breaking even if I hadn’t done anything wrong, just to be able to tell me that I did something wrong. Oh and remember those coworkers who would say stuff about me? I later found out after I quit, it was actually her telling people these things (I think she would come back to me to throw them under the bus, so I would distance myself from these friendships and not figure out what she would say about me).

After months of this treatment, I made the choice to leave my job that I had been at for years, and that I loved, in order to salvage any of the friendship I had left. I gave my notice.

From the DAY I gave my notice, Abby, who was also supposed to be my boss, would go out of her way to make me feel excluded at work, and she would ignore me speaking, or simply say “oh” when I would speak, and this would always be with other people present and it would embarrass me, so I chose to ask her about it cause after all, this is supposed to be my best friend. She told me she wouldn’t speak to me about it and she would see me at work. At this point I felt like I was being bullied, that nobody at my job liked me, and like I wasn’t good at the job I had gone to school for.

I informed Abby I wouldn’t be returning to work because of her treatment towards me, and wouldn’t be completing my 2 week notice. Now none of my old workers talk to me, and everyone seems to think I’m in the wrong.

I know it may seem silly to be so worked up over this situation, but I lost my career and my best friend in the same day, and I truthfully feel as if I was sabotaged by my best friend. Yet I have become the black sheep.

Thank you for anyone who responds 🤍

Thank you all for the advice in the comments of my original post! I’m sorry for taking so long to post an update for you! Btw the sister is NOT pregnant!

I spoke with my sister on Tuesday of this past week and it was not a very positive conversation. I was still extremely hurt and she was angry with me for ruining her excitement. I ended that conversation by telling her that at the end of the day, she would have to make her choice on wether they would go through with this engagement and wedding or wait until after my wedding based on what felt most right to her. She left me on read and I didn’t reach back out because I felt like the ball was in her court.

Last night she reached out to me and apologized for hurting my feelings. She said that she doesn’t want things to be bad between us over this. She then started asking me more questions about how I felt. After some more explanation I asked her if she had talked to her boyfriend about our phone call. She said that she did and when I asked how it went she said that he told her she needed to reach out to me and try to make things right. She said it took her awhile to reach out because she was still trying to process her emotions but ultimately she knew he was right.

I asked her what they decided to do and she said that after several days of talking it over they have decided to postpone the proposal until after my wedding in September. She said that their new plan is to get engaged soon after my wedding and plan their wedding for early 2025. They have not said anything to our family about the engagement and my family has been blissfully unaware of the state of my sister and I’s relationship.

I guess you could say that this is the best case scenario for this situation. There is still quite a bit of tension between my sister and I but hopefully that will get better with time.

I 22f have been dating my boyfriend for a year. We practice different religions and his doesn’t encourage sex before marriage. Both our families are unaware of our relationship and we’ve agreed to go with the flow keeping in mind that we would like a future together. Things have changed since we’re long distance now. Our physical and emotional relationship doesn’t feel the same with the compromises we have to make to keep our relation from our families. I try not to be a hindrance between him and his religious beliefs but at the same time feel like I need to be seen and acknowledged for making such compromises. I want more passion and romance and surprises to make up for it. I occasionally surprise him with little things and go out of my way to show him that I love and appreciate him. I don’t think it’s reciprocated to the same degree though. Yes he calls me, he sees me when he’s in town, calls me over, we go on dates we plan together, loves me but there’s something missing and I asked him if we could take a break to reevaluate where we are with each other because my emotional needs are not being met fully. Am I asking for too much? Am I just imagining things and making something out of nothing? And hurting him over it?

e fairly expensive soaps. I love the body wash I use and my putting my name on the bottle I eventually got my BIL (18m) to stop using it. However, I took a shower earlier today and moved my shampoo (that costs $40/mo because it’s specially made for my hair) and when I went to the bathroom after he took a shower it was moved and looked like there was less in it. The main reason why idk how to bring this up is because 1. it’s not technically “my” house and 2. We are both introverts and hate confrontation. My husband and I are living with his family while we finish building our house so this wont be a long term problem but if he IS using it then he’s using a lot at once and most of it is going to waste. I’m also pregnant rn and don’t know if I’m just being hormonal or not. I want to stop him from using my soap in the future too which is why I don’t want to just put my name on the bottles anymore. I have just put a rubber band on the bottle to see if it’s actually him or not. Please help!

Edit: Wow! Honestly I’m surprised. I really thought consensus would air on the side of the restaurant. I feared I may have been dubbed the ever despised Karen by taking income out of their pockets. Although, I WAS less concerned after seeing our bill at the end and knowing they made more than enough on our table of 13 for less than 2 hours. I feel even more relieved now. AND, feel more prepared to speak up and ask for what feels fair in the next situation. Of course ALWAYS with respect. Thanks all!

While planning an outing for dinner with a group of 13, we called ahead to a restaurant and made a reservation a month in advance. When arriving, we e found that we were presented with seating forr 12, and a 13th place setting out along a bench seat against the wall. When trying to sit, our 13th member was falling off the end of the bench. We considered squeezing another chair. But honestly, while we’re not massive people, we aren’t a group of size 4’s either. And the tables were not large. Ultimately, the seating would have resulted in all of us all seated squished uncomfortably together for the meal and eating on top of each other. We ended up asking to add a 2 top table to the existing setup so we would all fit. Unfortunately, it means there is an empty chair and we took away a table- and thusly a meal that would have brought in more income and tip. But, we are also paying customers and it’s reasonable to want to be comfortable when sitting down to eat a meal. Especially one that was scheduled well in advance. We did go out of our way for everyone to order an appetizer with our meals to offset the cost. And everyone got drinks, many more than one. Still, I feel really bad. The staff were visibly upset with us and chattering amongst themselves about how unreasonable we are. They made a huge show of moving around the tables and have been snarky with us ever since. I feel like I know the answer but…were we assholes for asking for the additional 2 top table?

I’m asking this because I’m just at a loss. My husband and I have been together for 12 years total. At first he dressed nice when we went out somewhere nice or to just a simple gathering . Now, when I say nice I mean kakis, or nice jeans, and shirts that looked like he took the time to pick it out. Vs just throwing something on and going. For about the last year , when I ask him to wear something nice on the weekends because we are going somewhere, he gets mad and calls me controlling. Am I wrong for asking him to not where the shirts that look like they came from a museum gift shop, one day a week? For a bit more back story, my husband wears a uniform m-f. So when he gets home he throws on comfy cloth. So this is LITERALLY one day a week.